Naruto was rather surprised to see Shino on the monument. He was taking a break after training with the Pervy Sage for a bit. Jiraiya had been beyond angry that Orochimaru had dragged the Fourth from the grave.
He was very happy that Shino had prevented Orochimaru from using the former Hokage against them.
"Hey Shino, what's up?"
"I just found out that I have family here in Konoha."
Naruto didn't get it.
"The woman who left me here came to visit her cousin. That cousin had a son who is currently in our year..." said Shino, trying to avoid telling Naruto.
"Yeah, and? Who's your cousin?"
Shino decided to get it out. Naruto would never let him hear the end of it if he kept stalling like this.
"You are."
"Hah?"
"According to the Hokage, Petunia Dursley came here intending to drop me off with your mother, only to find out that she had died. She left after leaving me on the doorstep of the Aburame compound."
"Wait, so we're...?"
"Related by blood?"
Naruto sat down hard. He had family! And best of all it was Shino, who he had always considered a brother in all but blood!
"Wow..."
"Tell me about it."
The two sat there for a few hours, before Naruto broached the subject of Hogwarts.
Shino winced.
"I don't really want to go, but something tells me that until I do, that old man will never stop harassing me. Fortunately the Hokage has informed me that when I decide to leave, I can take a full team with me."
"Count me in!" said Naruto.
"Always."
"So basically we have to escort Jiraiya and find Tsunade?" asked Shino.
"The only way to clear Minato for duty is to find her. And possibly blackmail her into taking this job if we can't keep Minato," muttered the Hokage.
Naruto could care less either way. After learning Shino was in fact his biological cousin, Shibi had decided to finally adopt Naruto into the clan. Naruto was currently living across the hall from Shino.
Remus and Snape had reluctantly returned to Hogwarts, mostly because Dumbledore had made it very clear they couldn't leave without formally resigning.
Remus had taken to heart what Shino had said about Sirius. Snape had already informed Shino about the circumstances behind Sirius' imprisonment, and Shino had done what any shinobi would have done.
He had looked underneath the underneath.
Shino had theorized that Sirius Black had been framed by the fourth Marauder, since the man actually had nothing to gain by betraying the Potters.
Pettigrew, on the other hand, had a lot more to gain from the act. Plus the way he had supposedly died was far too sloppy to be convincing.
There was absolutely no way that he could have exploded and left a finger untouched by the flames.
Which was why Remus was going to look for Sirius and hopefully get the full story from the man.
Naruto was actually eager to leave the village.
Since coming back to life through Orochimaru, the Fourth had been making a nuisance of himself. Naruto was actively trying to avoid the man for the oddest of reasons
While he respected him for defeating the Kyuubi no Yoko, Naruto couldn't help but feel a bit bitter towards him for sealing the fox inside him.
So yeah, he was eager to leave. Particularly since the Fourth couldn't leave the village for fear of Orochimaru coming back and finishing the control jutsu on him.
Shino had volunteered to go into the casinos while Jiraiya took Naruto to the bars. Shino had put the fear of lightning into the Toad sage to keep him from going anywhere near the bathhouses.
(Kakashi had words with Jiraiya, warning him about the fireflies that could electrocute him.)
Jiraiya didn't want to feel what being electrocuted was like. He had seen that movie with the white haired chick frying the toad kid.
(The first X-Men movie with Halle Berry.)
When they met up again, Jiraiya was gawking big time.
Shino had gotten bored and spent his allowance playing poker.
He was currently the one to beat at the table, and had over a million ryo in the pot.
"Royal flush," said Shino, laying down his cards.
The swearing could be heard from the street. Shino walked away having fleeced the entire table of nearly fifteen million ryo.
"Remind me never to play against you," said Jiraiya, shaking his head.
Naruto guffawed. Even he knew better than to go against Shino at poker. He had the best poker face among the genin and the chunin!
They immediately headed to the next town, to avoid anyone seeking revenge for being beaten so thoroughly at poker.
Shino opened the door to reveal...a blue skinned shark? He blinked.
"Oi, Naruto, seems like someone delivered sushi."
The shark person growled. He hated sushi lovers. (LOL. All hail the Tobi Show on Youtube!)
Naruto stared wide eyed at the shark person, then he spotted the Mist headband and grabbed his kunai.
Shino's attention, however, was drawn to the man down the hallway.
"I don't believe it. Itachi?"
"Hello Aburame."
Shino's attention was brought back when he heard Naruto squawk. The Shark had grabbed him by the collar.
"Let my cousin go or I'll show you why the Copy Ninja fears me," snapped Shino.
Itachi raised an eyebrow.
The shark yelped when Shino's firefly swarm started to sting him repeatedly with sharp, but powerful jolts of lightning. The man was obviously a water type, which meant his lightning would hurt more than usual.
"We're here for Naruto," said Itachi.
"Not going to happen on my watch. I'm not letting you kidnap my cousin."
"Cousin?"
"Naruto's mother was the cousin of my own," said Shino.
Everyone was surprised when the hallway grew colder, and the shark looked very shocked to see Haku.
"Uncle Kisame, why are you harassing my boyfriend?"
"Haku? Boyfriend?" said Kisame, his eyes darting between Haku and Shino.
"Uncle Kisame?" said the Leaf nin.
"I take it this is the same Haku you've mentioned before?" asked Itachi, raising an eyebrow.
"Considering my boxers are turning to ice..." winced Kisame.
"ITACHI!" shrieked Sasuke.
Shino had had enough. He sent all his bugs after Sasuke, Kisame and Itachi.
Soon the only people with enough chakra to fight were Naruto, Shino and Haku.
"Right. Could someone please explain what the hell is going on?" asked Shino, his eyes twitching behind his glasses.
Itachi looked at his partner, then at Shino.
"We are after the tailed beasts, and that means we intend to kidnap Naruto."
"Heard Itachi was in the area," admitted Sasuke.
"Decided to keep Sasuke from getting himself killed," said Haku.
Shino pinched the bridge of his nose. Some days weren't worth getting up for.
"Right... Sasuke, I seriously doubt Itachi killed your clan without a good reason. And frankly I found the rumors as to why you killed them rather ridiculous."
Itachi raised an eyebrow. Someone had actually seen through that farce?
Shino looked at Kisame.
"I don't care if you are Haku's uncle or not. If you try to hurt my cousin, I will strangle you barehanded and use your sword as a paperweight."
Shino looked at Haku.
"And as for you..."
Haku tried for innocent and failed.
"What? You think I was going to let you run off without me?"
"...Point. So it seems we're at a standstill. Any suggestions?"
"...Can I kill Itachi?" asked Sasuke.
Shino walked up and whocked Sasuke on the head. The boy cursed, and rubbed the lump that was starting to form.
"Continue trying to kill him at your skill level and I will use a genjutsu that forces you to date the banshee," said Shino flatly.
Sasuke looked at him with wide eyes.
"You wouldn't dare."
"Try me. If I can keep Kuranai Yuhi under a genjutsu for an hour without her being able to break it, then what's to stop me from doing the same to you? Especially since your Sharingan has yet to encounter a proper genjutsu?"
Sasuke winced and Itachi cracked a grin that was hidden by his cloak. Shino knew how to hit Sasuke and good.
"So gentlemen, do you have any suggestions?"
Itachi knew it was probably a bad idea to cross Shino, particularly since it was obvious he wasn't going to let Naruto go without a fight. He looked to his partner and said "Come back later when he's alone?"
Kisame looked at Itachi as if he was nuts.
"And leave my impressionable niece at the hands of someone like him?"
Haku kicked Kisame in the shin.
"Please, he's been trying to get me away from the Twilight series for weeks and onto Icha Icha," she rolled her eyes.
Kisame twitched.
He looked at Itachi, eyes pleading. They needed a vacation from this ridiculous hunt dammit! Their leader never once let them have a break, and some of the other members were starting to get on their nerves! (coughTobicough)
Itachi remained stoic as ever. Shino was starting to develop a migraine...and then an idea hit him.
He could send these two to England and make that old man's life hell. It would get them away from Naruto and give them both something to do.
"I may have a solution to your problem..." started Shino.
And then he outlined his idea. Itachi and Kisame were all for it. They could cause some chaos and still be out of Shino's hair. Plus it would double as their vacation!
It was a win-win for all.
Jiraiya returned ten minutes after the two had left, with an unconscious woman in tow.
Shino raised an eyebrow, clearly wanting to know why he had her with him.
"She was under genjutsu and I rushed back?"
"Riiight...and we're supposed to believe that one? I need some aspirin..." said Shino.
Shino stared at the two women they had been sent to find. Was that...a pig with pearls around it's neck?
"You expect me to return there?" demanded Tsunade incredulous.
Shino had been suffering a rather nasty headache for days since Itachi left. Jiraiya still couldn't believe Shino had already figured out the Uchiha massacre was a ruse, even if he didn't know the real cause of it.
Haku was the only reason Shino hadn't sent his hive after the sannin. Her use of senbon had managed to do what aspirin couldn't.
Shino gave the woman a flat look.
"Just because of a few issues in your past you think it's necessary to drown yourself in booze and make a joke of yourself?" he asked annoyed. His migraine was growing worse.
Tsunade glared at him, and he gave his best one back. He was tired, cranky and his head felt like it was splitting in two. It didn't help that he had been stuck trying to help Naruto learn the Rasengan while Jiraiya taught him new seals to use.
In short he was in the mood to kill something, and her attitude was making her his prime target.
Aside from hearing the terms laid, Shino was not a happy camper. He had his beetles follow the woman to a local hotel, and to his delight it was completely made of wood.
If she was going to be a pain in the ass, then he was going to play her game.
Her cry of rage when she returned from the hot springs with her apprentice was particularly satisfying. Their roof was completely gone...not even a splinter left.
Baffled by this occurrence, the owner gave them another room. Only for the two to discover it had suddenly developed a leak within a few hours, and both ended up completely soaked courtesy of a minor rainstorm.
To say they were annoyed was an understatement.
Shino found the perfect way to relieve his migraine as he made sure neither of them got any sleep that night. It took Tsunade a good twelve hours and three hotels to figure out that the reason the roof and walls kept vanishing was because of a sudden termite problem that kept following them.
The two decided to sleep under the stars in a makeshift tent.
Tsunade shot him a glare the next morning.
Itachi was bored. After coming to England, he had learned a few things about the country that made him wonder how it had survived so long.
A week upon coming to England, he had discovered a secondary community of people he had originally believed to be shinobi. That thought was quickly changed the longer he was exposed to it.
The people were ignorant, lazy and above all cowards. They wouldn't last a minute against a real shinobi. Plus they all seemed to be searching for a boy named Potter.
Itachi already suspected that he had met this Potter, and the chances of him being their so called savior were absolutely slim to none.
Shino never believed in prophecies and certainly wasn't as good as these people believed.
Kisame had already chosen their next destination. It was a country called Scotland.
The two followed what appeared to be train tracks to a small village, and promptly stole enough gold coins to get a room for the night.
The village was called Hogsmeade, and it was rather quaint. Itachi could feel his nerves calming down while he was there.
Though he wished that the dog he saw in the village would quit following him around...
Tsunade stared. The brat who had been pranking her nonstop was asleep in the lap of what appeared to be a Mist nin. His glasses were off, and he had a few senbon in him.
"What the hell?"
"His migraine has gotten worse. I don't think my senbon are going to cut it for much longer," said the girl.
Tsunade, seeing a chance to get the kid to leave her the hell alone, moved to the boy's side. His breathing was shallow, as if he was fighting some inner pain.
"Let me take a look."
Tsunade tried not to wince as she scan the kid. Something was blocking his chakra output, and it wasn't because of the senbon. The girl clearly knew a thing or two about the human body, because she had never hit any points that could cause this.
Tsunade carefully tried to unblock the boy's chakra. Since he was an Aburame, she knew if she didn't do something he would be dead within a week at the most. Possibly sooner, judging by the amount of insects the kid had.
It wasn't that she liked the kid or anything, just that if she didn't do something then he was likely to annoy her even more.
Shino woke up during her examination, and Tsunade tried not to gasp at the color of his eyes. She had never seen such pure green.
"What are you doing?"
"Trying to unblock your chakra."
"...It's not my chakra that is blocked," he said.
Seeing her confused look, Shino sat up. His head was absolutely murdering him at this point.
"I have a secondary power that was rarely used until now, but recently I've been training with it. It still hasn't stabilized," said Shino.
Years of not using his magic had caused it to stagnate. After waking it up by training with Snape and Remus, his magic was trying to take over. Shino's chakra control would be shot until he got it back under control.
Unfortunately, it also meant he wouldn't be able to use his full hive until it was back to normal. If he tried it could kill him.