I am not JK Rowling, no matter how much I wish I could be.

The Marriage Flaw

When marriage goes horribly wrong for the Wizarding World.

Mucho thanks goes to both of my beta's Rusty and Krystle! The title of this chapter is dedicated to Rusty Weasley for his quick wit and quite possibly the best line in this chapter ;). Also sending love to the Mom's that type fanfic one handed while feeding their children (looking at you Krystle) ... like i am now lol

Chapter 10

Hermione and the rest of her traveling companions made it safely back to the Burrow.

"Glad to see you are back dears! How did it go?" Molly Weasley asked as she finished up the lovely lunch she had just prepared.

"Pretty well Mum. Got our forms right here!" Ginny exclaimed as she set her form down on the table.

"Wonderful, we can have a nice lunch and then you can fill out your surveys together, yes?" Molly tried to hide the anxiety she felt about these children being forced to marry so early, and matched up by a stupid form. She felt that there was no reason to let her sadness show, so she busied herself with food preparation.

Hermione interrupted "Actually, I think I am going to fill mine out back at my flat. I am knackered and I don't have much of an appetite."

"What? You can't leave now! That will spoil our plan!" Ron shouted as he stopped mid-bite into a pumpkin tart.

"Don't be silly, Ronald. There is no 'plan'. It's foolish to think that filling out the form with the same answers will guarantee our pairing! For one thing, we may not be the only 2 people that choose that sequence of answers. For another, what about the old saying that opposites attract? Did you ever think you may actually interfere with our match by choosing the same answers? There is nothing we can do now, so I am going home to have a nice long soak and then I will be promptly filling out my survey truthfully. If I have to marry someone I want the best match possible!"

Ron grumbled under his breath and Hermione gave him a quick peck on the cheek before turning to Molly.

"Molly, thank you for preparing lunch. I appreciate it very much, but I must go now. Please accept my apology." Hermione turned to her friends and said, "

I will see you all later. Best of luck in filling out your surveys. I will Owl someone tomorrow so we can meet." Without giving them a chance to interrupt, she quickly apparated away to her flat.

Severus returned home grumpier than ever.

This blasted survey … certainly the last thing I want to do at the moment. He let himself into his house and immediately set the kettle to boil for a nice cup of tea.

He sat the survey down on his kitchen table and began to peruse his refrigerator for something to eat.

Blast! I guess I am going to have to go to the market, he thought as he stared into his bare refrigerator. He grabbed the items to make a ham and cheese sandwich and got to work. As he finished making his sandwich, his kettle whistled, and he sat down at the table to peruse the survey...

Hermione entered her kitchen to prepare some beans on toast and a lovely cup of tea. Once she was finished, she turned around and headed, with food and tea in tow, to the little bistro style table she kept in her kitchen area.

"Well, better now than never," she said aloud. "At least if I fill this blasted thing out the Ministry won't come knocking on my door." She sat down at the table to peruse the survey...

Please state your name and blood status:

Hermione Granger, Muggle-born

Severus Snape, Half-blood.

Question 1: Would you date someone that held different beliefs?

Why yes of course! It would depend on the belief, but I feel being open-minded is important in a relationship. I always think that people have the capacity for change and growth is important for each of us.

What sort of insipid question is this? Why should I care what anyone thinks?

Question 2: Is it ever acceptable for a mature witch/wizard to be in a relationship with someone under the age of twenty-one?

I believe it's perfectly acceptable. Love should be about the people, not their age. I feel that it is what is inside that counts. Besides, witches and wizards tend to live very long lives and just a few years doesn't matter in the long run.

If the man is the older one is question, he will no doubt be labeled a fool. An intelligent fool, but a fool nonetheless.

Question 3: Which of these options most closely describes what you're looking for in your next relationship? Choose as many as you wish.

Friends with benefits

Someone to come home to.

Marriage and family. I'm ready to settle down with the person of my dreams.

Someone to always be there for me and if that includes marriage then so be it.

Someone to go out with.

Someone who's there only when I need them.

Someone to come home to. Someone to always be there for me. Also, ideally, Marriage and family WITH SOMEONE I LOVE - which I would like to point out you are TAKING THAT OPTION FROM ME!

Friends with benefits (I am a man after all). Someone to come home to.

Question 4: Do you believe you have the right to forbid your significant other anything?

Yes of course, if it is something harmful or foolish to themselves, but I would hope that the person I am paired with does not make those types of decisions rashly. I think it is important to spend one's life constantly learning.

If required, yes.

Question 5: What type of lover are you?

I am NOT going to answer this question on a Ministry form!

Extremely proficient.

Question 6: How are you most likely to show your partner you care?

Words, actions, gifts and touch and that's just the start, there so much more to showing love. It's the everyday little things, as well as romance. I think it important to communicate so that one knows what the other appreciates.

I shall protect them.

Question 7: List your favorite hobbies and activities

Reading. Studying at the library. A nice long soak. A good cuppa. Spending time with friends. Speaking to anyone with intelligence. Research.

Communicating with anyone that has interesting thoughts. Reading. A good cuppa. Spending time alone. Brewing. Research.

Question 8: Do you have any physical preferences for your partner match?

Not in particular. I am attracted to nice eyes and strong facial features though.

Seeing as you are not offering me a choice in the matter, what she looks like is irrelevant.

Question 9: What is the most important quality to you in a relationship?

Honesty. Bravery or a sense of service. Dependability. Intelligence.

Patience, since I have none.

Question 10: What is your star signs?

I was born on September 19th, so I am a Virgo, almost on the cusp, but definitely a Virgo.

I now see that the arcane sciences have worked their way into the Ministry. My birthday is January 9th. Work it out for yourself.

Please sign here when this form is completed:

Thank you for filling out the Ministry mandated form. A ministry-approved owl should be arriving shortly to collect your items and your match results should be sent to you in a timely manner. Do not forget to send your blood samples and a copy of your family tree with the owl. Thank you for participating and the Ministry of Magic wishes you all the best.

"That's it?" Hermione asked finishing up the form. "Ten bloody questions and they will have your 'perfect match'? I can't believe that's all they asked - and one of them was 'What is your star sign?' Bloody hell. That seals it. I'm going to pack my bags."

Hermione magically drew the blood needed for the sample, filled out her family tree, and attached them to the tawny owl that had arrived promptly 5 minutes after she finished her survey. She promptly went to the hall closet where she stored her overnight bag and began to plan for her departure from the Wizarding World.

Please sign here when this form is completed:

"Well now that's finished." Severus said to himself as he signed the form and waited for the owl to arrive.

I wonder which poor soul is going to be paired with me? he thought as he drew the blood for the test tube lying on his table. A snowy white owl cooed at him from the window. He filled out his family tree and attached the survey, vial, and family tree to the owl.

Now that is over and I can return to my normal life for a while, he thought, making his way down to his potions lab to start a new brew.

Curious as to the results? Stay tuned - the matches come back in the next chapter!