Sock-clad feet sat propped on the edge of the wide ledge as Regina Mills stared inattentively through the wire-meshed window, her ever-present notebook resting open in her lap while she idly twirled a pencil in her right hand.
Early afternoon sunlight dappled the verdant hospital grounds as it filtered through the vibrant reds, oranges, and yellows of the autumn leaves that swayed in the gentle breeze. A profusion of colorful flowerbeds dotted the grassy area that was often used by patients and staff alike. Even now with winter edging ever closer, there were more than a few individuals seated on benches or taking a leisurely stroll along the paved paths.
While Regina had yet to avail herself of the little park, her focus always on more important things, the desire to explore it had been growing since her… encounter with Cameron.
She'd taken to antagonizing the nurses as a distraction, but that had quickly lost its appeal with the threat of restraints. Every nook and cranny that had already been carefully examined was searched again just for the hell of it and speaking with the other residents had proven to be nothing more than a frustrating waste of time and energy.
After that thoroughly eventful day, Regina had run out of ways to divert her attention from the chaotic swirl of conflicting thoughts and emotions churning inside her and wandering the lush garden would have been preferable to the hours of restless pacing she'd indulged in instead.
Each time the memory of delicate lips issuing that soft whimper of surrender invaded her senses, it sent her mind reeling and released a kaleidoscope of fluttering butterflies in her belly. The fact that, at the time, she'd thought Cameron was actually Emma did little to pacify her conscience, especially since her heart still insisted on tripping over itself whenever she thought of the young doctor.
Guilt immediately followed these thoughts only to turn into simmering anger that she no way to release. The rational part of her mind, that constantly reminded her that this was all fake, was unable to counter the irrational sense of hurt and betrayal at Cameron's continued evasion and Regina felt the doctor owed her an apology for behaving like such a child.
Despite her best efforts, Regina was aware that her ire had boiled over into her waking world where Emma and quite a bit of her court had borne the brunt of her ill temper. Fortunately, Henry had been completely oblivious to the building tension between his mothers over the last few days and had left earlier that morning to spend some time with his grandparents.
While Regina knew she would miss his cheering presence around the castle, she'd taken hold of the opportunity presented and pushed aside all her meetings for the next several days in order to spend the extra alone time with Emma as an apology. They'd already started, in fact, skipping supper in the formal dining room and opting to spend the evening feeding each other in bed instead before falling asleep wrapped in each other's arms.
A smug grin pulled at one corner of her full lips at what an excellent distraction that had turned out to be for both her and the blonde.
"Regina," a voice called from the entrance of the cafeteria, breaking the brunette from her thoughts.
Regina turned to lay into whoever had dared interrupt her, most knew to leave her be by this point, but her brown eyes immediately softened when they landed on the plump form of an older lady clad in white scrubs.
Jeanie was the sole person that she'd met so far in this nightmare that she truly liked. The nurse was the only one on the ward who could stand their ground against even her most piercing glares plus, Regina was pretty sure the other woman was well aware of the fact that she hadn't taken any of her meds since that first night, but had yet to say anything about it.
A dark eyebrow rose in question as Jeanie waved her over. Caramel eyes rolled at her stubbornness and the older woman huffed in irritation that Regina knew was just for show.
Somehow, this strange bond had formed between them and Regina had no problems conceding to the other woman's requests most of the time; didn't mean she always made it easy, though.
"Come now, child," the nurse said in her slight Southern lilt, "don't make me walk all the way over there and drag you out by your ear. We ain't goin' far and I think you'll be happy with what I wanna show you."
"It wouldn't happen to be my discharge papers by any chance, would it?" Regina asked drolly as she rose from her seat and placed it back under the table before following the older woman out into the hall.
"Oh ha-ha, smart ass. Would you just hush? You'll find out soon enough."
"I'm getting a roommate?" the brunette asked when the duo entered her room, eyeing the black duffle bag resting on one of the beds with clear suspicion.
"Heaven help the person that ever has to room with you," Jeanie chuckled. "No, the nurses in reception said someone dropped that off for you last night. They had to go through it for any prohibited items first, of course, but it checked out and now it's all yours."
Regina tossed her journal on the bed and opened the bag, spying an assortment of neatly packed clothes inside; her clothes she realized when she came across her favorite black turtleneck.
"Did they say who brought it?" she asked curiously.
"Now that you mention it, no they didn't. I figured it musta been a friend or neighbor," the older woman answered with a shrug.
Regina hummed non-committedly as she pulled out the various shirts and jeans the mystery person had packed for her. She had an idea who it could be, but was unwilling to dwell on it, knowing the possible motive behind such a caring gesture would only add to her already conflicted emotions.
"All right, young lady, I gotta head back out there, but I'll see you later this evening. Wouldn't want wanna hand off the difficult task of your nightly meds to anyone else," Jeanie said with a teasing grin and a subtle wink before heading out.
Regina shut the door behind the departing nurse, quickly stripping off the sweats she'd been stuck in the last several weeks before pulling on a pair of dark wash jeans and her black turtleneck. The scent of apples and cinnamon wrapped around her, soothing in its familiarity, but hidden just beneath was something new, something she couldn't place but seemed to recognize.
Brushing it aside as something to pursue later, the brunette picked her journal up off the other bed and got comfortable on her own before opening it to the last entry and continuing where she'd left off.
Monday dawned bright and clear and while definitely chilly, it promised to reach the low 60's later in the day; not bad for mid-October.
Taking a moment to settle into her office after the morning staff meeting, Dr. Alison Cameron placed a call to ward three before she lost her nerve, informing the charge nurse that she would be able to resume her sessions with Ms. Mills that afternoon.
It'd been nearly a week since the kiss and she hoped that they'd both be able to do the adult thing in this situation and just pretend that it never happened. Today's session would be stressful enough without adding that awkwardness to it as well.
As it always does when one is dreading something, time flew quickly and before Cameron was adequately prepared, there was a knock at her door.
The younger woman watched as Regina waltzed in, her normal aloof demeanor intact, giving no indication that anything unusual had ever happened between them.
Cameron had the sinking sensation that all the doubt and confusion she'd suffered over the last several days had been entirely one-sided before pushing it away as inconsequential. Regardless of how the other woman felt, the brunette was definitely off bounds, not only had she recently lost her wife and child, but, more importantly, she was a patient.
"Doctor," Regina greeted coolly as she sat primly in one of the provided chairs.
"Good afternoon, Ms. Mills," Cameron returned professionally, focusing on the other woman's chocolate eyes so that her own green ones would not be tempted to travel over the lithe body encased in designer jeans and a light blue button-up.
"So how have you been since our last session? Any problems with your meds or…"
"I take it there's a reason you resumed our sessions after nearly a week," Regina interrupted, annoyance edging her tone, "and that it wasn't to check on my health; the nurses keep you well informed on that, after all. Now, if you'd be kind enough to just get to the point so we can return to completely ignoring each other's existence and be all the happier for it."
Cameron's head nearly snapped back at the unexpected verbal assault launched her direction. She'd anticipated some anger for invading the older woman's privacy by going to her apartment, but Regina's vitriolic response hadn't even mentioned it and there was a note of hurt lacing the brunette's voice, though that was probably more wishful thinking on her part, that baffled the doctor.
"Very well," the fair-haired brunette acquiesced, shifting uncomfortably in her seat a moment before starting. "I went by your apartment complex this weekend and spoke with one of your neighbors, Audrey Stevenson," Cameron paused a second waiting for a sign of recognition that never came, "and she loaned me the spare key to your apartment so that I could bring you some of your own things. You don't seem surprised by this."
"Your lack of response to my newly acquired clothing was very telling, Doctor. Besides, you're the only one presumptuous enough in this facility to actually enter into someone else's home without their permission, or am I just one of the special few?"
"It's not something I make a habit of nor was it my original intention," Cameron defended, slightly miffed at the brunette's insult even if it was a fairly warranted, "but, while Mrs. Stevenson was very informative about your past, your apartment gave me a greater insight into how you've been dealing with it."
"In what way?" Regina asked, irritation coating her contralto voice. "We've been over my situation countless times and yet you still refuse believe me. While I realize that is unlikely to ever happen, you should know me well enough by now to recognize the fact that I am just as stubborn as you and just as unlikely to believe anything you try to tell me as well."
"Therein lies the problem, Ms. Mills," Cameron countered frankly. "I don't know you and I had no reason to believe anything you said before now. Here, look at these," she handed over two of the images she'd taken from Regina's apartment, noticing the immediate relaxing of the brunette's posture and the soft smile that edged across her mouth at the images.
Audrey hadn't been exaggerating when she described the way Regina lit up when talking about her wife and son. Until this moment, Cameron had only seen them as an abstract delusion and not the living beings they had been. Now she realized what a great disservice she'd done not only to their memory, but to the woman sitting in front of her as well.
Brown eyes shown with such love and devotion that this Regina looked to be a completely different person from the one the doctor had witnessed the past several weeks and she was forced to ignore the small pang that jolted her heart at the sight. It would do her no good to be jealous of a ghost.
"Of all the people you drew, these two were pictured the most. Am I correct in assuming that they are Emma and Henry?"
"Yes," Regina answered, her earlier anger fading away, "but I don't do portraits; abstract is more my thing."
"Well these were found in your living room with at least a couple hundred others, so whatever form of expression you pursued in your professional life clearly wasn't the same as in your personal. I am curious as to how you're so sure that's Emma when you can't even see her face, though."
A small chuckle escaped the brunette as she finally turned her attention back to the doctor, "Believe me, I'd know those golden curls and that horrendous jacket anywhere. I was so glad when it got lost in the transition back to Fairytale Land but Emma was so upset I had my tailor design a similar one for her."
"I'm sure she appreciated the gesture," Cameron responded evenly, playing along with the brunette's fantasy now that she seemed open to sharing in a way she hadn't before. "How did you two meet?"
"Emma is Henry's biological mother, but I adopted him when he was just an infant. When he was ten, he got the bright idea to hop on a bus and go down to Boston to find his birth mother and bring her back to Storybrooke. I did everything in my power to chase her out of town, but she never left."
"So it wasn't love at first sight then?" Cameron asked as she unobtrusively took notes on the yellow legal pad resting on her lap. Already, the brunette's version of events was different from the story she'd heard this weekend and the doctor was curious to see how cohesive Regina's fictional life was.
"Gods no," the brunette practically snorted. "She threatened to unravel the world I'd sacrificed so much in order to create and if that weren't enough, every day Henry grew closer to her and pulled further away from me."
"So what changed?"
"I don't think I can pinpoint one specific moment, but eventually our antagonism turned to something more and I finally got the happily ever after I thought I'd never see."
"What about Henry? How did he take handle the relationship?"
"It was rough at first. He thought it was some spell the 'Evil Queen' had cast upon the 'Savior', but in time he came around and our relationship is stronger than it ever was before. He's fifteen now," Regina said as a wistful smile crossed her face. "He's turned into such a remarkable young man and will make a fine king one day, but sometimes I miss my little boy. I guess all parents go through that at some point though."
"I'll admit that until Mrs. Stevenson mentioned them, I hadn't actually believed that they existed. I figured they were all a part of the fantasy world you'd created, but when I got home Saturday night I expanded my search and was able to find them."
"You found them here, in this world? I'm honestly surprised by that. I figured whoever created this place would want me to assume that the never existed at all."
"Be that as it may, I'll warn you now, Mrs. Stevenson's versions of events, as well as what I was able to dig up, doesn't really match anything that you just told me," Cameron said gravely, trying to impress upon the other woman the severity of what she was about to reveal.
"Oh please, did Emma steal my fortune before running off with a stripper? I doubt anything you show me would be truly troubling; this is only a dream after all."
Pulling out the articles she'd printed, Cameron handed them over to Regina, closely studying the older woman's reaction as she read through them. She'd organized them carefully starting with the ones she'd found yesterday outlining Regina's career as Erin Mariam Gellis, another shock for the young doctor since 'Erin' was her favorite artist, and finishing with several on the car accident that had ended Emma and Henry's lives and nearly taken Regina's as well.
At least now she knew where all the other scars on Regina's arms and legs had come from, relieved that they had not been self-inflicted as she'd previously believed.
Long, quiet minutes passed as the brunette slowly flipped through each page, a myriad of emotions playing out on her elegant features. Reaching the final few, Cameron watched as silent tears began to stream down high cheek bones, unsure if the painful memories were finally resurfacing and breaking through Regina's delusion or if it was something else entirely.
Delicate fingers flew to the brunette's lips and a strangled gasp filled the air when Regina reached the final article. Brown eyes rolled back into her head as they fluttered shut and before she even realized what she was doing, Cameron was out of her chair and around the desk catching the older woman as she slumped unconscious into her arms.
All around them the printed pages detailing the tragic turning point of one woman's life drifted to the ground while one remained tightly clutched in her hand. The crumpled paper showed the smiling couple dressed to the nines for Regina's latest opening with their teenage son standing proudly between them on one side while the other depicted the mangled metal skeleton of the car they'd driven home in later that same night.
A/N: If you follow me on twitter (JadziaDax86), then you'll probably know that I've been struggling with this chapter. It's just that Erato & Melpomene were fighting and Calliope was trying to moderate while Thalia was taking notes to use it in one of her plays. Urania was completely useless in her own little world and the rest of the Muses were nowhere to be found. (Yes, each one has a specific reason for being mentioned where they were. Nerd humor.) So, I'm sorry it took so long to get out. I really do want to post weekly, but I just could not get it together for this one and, honestly, I'm still not too pleased with it, but it does what I need it to so I won't complain too much. On the plus side, I am nearly finished with the first chapter of one of my bonus fics. Now all I'm waiting on is for us to hit those numbers on this story. Which, we're only 20 away in reviews and follows so that's great! We still have a bit to go with this story so I know we'll get there. A heartfelt thanks to all my reviewers. I have seriously entertained the idea of scrapping this story more than once over the past two weeks, but remembering all the wonderful comments I've received help me suck it up and plow through. Hopefully, it'll only get better from here. Much love you guys!