The first thing Seras became aware of when she came back to consciousness was the smell of Jan's cigarettes subtly invading her senses; this was followed briefly by feeling the familiar suede couch under her body, letting her know that they were back at the loft. Before she even moved or opened her eyes, Jan spoke.

"Moon's up, Baby Bat," he said softly, as though not wanting to ruin the dark ambience. "Wake up."

Obediently, Seras opened her eyes and sat up, seeing that they were in the lounge, seated in total darkness with only the dim illumination of Jan's cigarette giving off any kind of light. The dim light reflected brightly against Jan's golden eyes, which were pinned to Seras's form, and Seras could see that his pupils had gone from circular to elliptical.

Jan took a drag from his cigarette and exhaled slowly, keeping his eyes pinned to her. "A bit overwhelmin', wasnt it?" he asked, and Seras knew exactly what he spoke of, forcing herself to keep the shiver from the memories down.

The blood.

The carnage.

The POWER.

Jan's power.

Letting out the tiniest shudder, Seras shifted her eyes up to Jan only to find he was leaning barely inches away from her, his golden eyes glowing softly, the hardness in them DARING her to scream. She flinched, but didnt dare draw away or scream. Jan's stone-hard gaze kept her pinned for the longest time before he reached up with his free hand to get a hold of her jaw, though not hardly tight enough for it to hurt.

"You saw it, didn't ya, Baby Bat?" he asked rhetorically, a hint of fang glinting from his smirk. "Ya SAW what real vampirism was, didn't ya?"

Oh, she saw alright. She saw a REAL goddamned vampire in all his Hellfire horror and glory. She had FELT him, like his very presence had merged with the air around him and was suffocating everything with it, just so it would die and become part of him...

Snapping back to the reality where Jan demanded vocal answers, Seras quickly nodded. "Y...yes," she breathed, swallowing hard. Jan's smirk broadened.

"An' how did it make ya feel?" he asked, his eyes glowing slightly. Seras swallowed hard and answered honestly,

"Scared." Another swallow. "...Small. I...it made me feel small and..."

"...Weak?" Jan supplied, smirking at the small flinch in Seras's eyes, letting him know he'd hit the nail on the head. "Well, ya aint lyin'." He took the final drag of cigarette and let the smoke twist and slither from between his fangs, his eyes glowing brighter with glee. "Ya ARE weak, Baby Bat." He poked at her forehead with the tip of his finger, as though SOMEhow, it would emphasize his point.

"Ya think that just because you can lift five times yer weight an' break a spine in two with a flick of yer wrist, THAT makes ya strong." He flicked the cigarette butt away. "Yer fuckin' WRONG." The fingers around her jawline clenched tighter. "Fer a REAL vampire, yer fuckin' WEAK, Baby Bat. Th' weak link in th' chain that'll be CUT if ya dont learn what it MEANS t' be a vampire!"

Seras was taken back to the conversations she had with her former master Alucard; he had been saying almost the same thing before throwing his hands up- metaphorically speaking -and resigning her to the fate of a 'daywalker'.

Looking back on it, she thought she called disappointment in his eyes and a hint of disgust at the term 'daywalker', like it was a disgraceful thing to be.

Back then, she didnt understand WHY it was disgraceful, but now she had a feeling that Alucard had been trying to teach her something. But what? What was so disgraceful about being a 'daywalker'?

"Everything."

Seras jumped slightly, her attention brought back to the present, and to Jan, who was staring unblinking at her, his eyes glowing slightly. It took her a moment to realize that he was skimming her thoughts, and resisted the urge to rub at her head, as though to shake his presence out.

Jan snorted softly and sat back in his chair, splaying his fingers out as though holding up a proverbial picture. "Think of it this way, Baby Bat," he began in his 'lecture' voice. "Picture vampires as a breed of dog. Purebred studs, the textbook fuckin' definition of perfection. Top o' th' food chain creatures everyone covets, but only a select few can possess.

"The pedigree o' these 'dogs' are strong, powerful, an' rare," he continued, knowing he had her undivided attention. "They make their way to th' top by doin' what they do best." His eyes flashed brightly with Hellfire. "By killin'. These dogs are KILLERS. Th' PERFECT hunters. Th' PERFECT predator. They kill an' fight an' eat through even their own kin t' get to th' top of th' pile o' shit that breeds nowadays."

There was a pause, as though he wanted Seras to add her input, or ask questions. Though many questions filtered through her head- most of which consisted of WHY a vampire had to kill and fight and such -she remained silent.

"Ya aint human anymore, Baby Bat," Jan continued, speaking bluntly. "No matter how much ya wish ya were, ya aint goin' back." He fished out another cigarette and lit it up. "You spent yer whole life tryin' t' be a good human...so why now spend th' rest of it NOW tryin' t' be a good fuckin' vampire, eh?"

Seras stared at him, her jaw slightly slacked. She had NEVER expected something so...clear and conciese on the matter from HIM of all people. It was scary just how much SENSE someone as insane and maniacle as Jan freaking Valentine could make, especially on this dilemma.

Oh, yes, her former master Alucard had tried, but he never put it into frank terms like that. And if Jan was ANYTHING, it was frank. Profane, but frank.

As she sorted through those thoughts, Jan's mouth curled into a smirk, a hint of fang glinting in the dim light. He knew giving her a feel for true vampirism would make her a little more open to the general idea; the hatred of killing would be overrode by the hatred of humans who would toss their humanity out the window for a thrill. For as long as Big Red had been walking the Earth as an undead, he really didnt know how to deal with Seras. Indulging her had only increased her fear of what was to come.

Jan knew that as many souls as she had devoured, only her fears and inhibitions had kept her from utilizing the power those souls could provide. If she would only let that wall cave in, she should already have the power to perform the basic vampiric abilities.

But she had to WANT it first. She would have to WANT the power. She already felt it and feared it...but she was also intrigued. Awed.

...Covetous.

She had a seed of covet in her mind, and now all he had to do was nurture it.

As Seras dwelled in silence, Jan began to draw up a new gameplan.

Nurture versus nature, he thought to himself.

What would win?