Take a breath

I pull myself together

Just another step

Until I reach the door

You'll never know the way

It tears me up inside to see you

I wish that I could tell you something

To take it all away

Sometimes I wish I could save you

And there's so many things that I want you to know

I won't give up til it's over

If it takes you forever I want you to know

Castiel found Sam outside room 7B. The concealed room inside had been consecrated before retrieving Dean's body from Hell. The hardest part, so far, had been wrestling Dean into it. He'd not gone willingly but Castiel knew the hardest part for Sam hadn't even begun. From the depths of the room, Dean was screaming and cursing, threatening to kill anyone who came through the door.

Sam was sitting cross-legged in the floor, his back against the wall, tears in his eyes. Castiel hunkered in front of him.

"Sam, are you okay?"

Sam's face told Castiel he was anything but okay but Sam stubbornly nodded his head. "I can do this. I have to do this."

Sam's eyes were swimming with pain and Castiel hated himself for having to add to it. "There's something you need to know before you start."

"CASTIEL! I HEAR YOU OUT THERE. I'M GOING TO RIP YOU APART!"

Dean's words seemed to awaken something in Sam. He grasped Castiel's arm. "Cas, what did you do with the First Blade?"

"It's safe, Sam, but you need to know what Crowley told me about the Mark."

"SAMMY! LET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Sam cringed at his brother's voice. "Tell me, Cas."

"Crowley said the Mark was making Dean sick before he died. The First Blade's purpose is to kill and combined with the Mark, it's probably the most powerful weapon we'll ever come across but its power can't be contained by a human body. As long as Dean has the Mark, the First Blade is going to demand that he kill and if he doesn't…..." Castiel found he couldn't finish the sentence. They didn't go through all of this just to watch Dean die again.

"What am I supposed to do, Cas?" Sam's voice broke. "I can't leave him like this."

"Crowley is looking for a solution. There has to be some way to remove the Mark."

Sam scoffed. "And Crowley is so reliable."

"In this case, yes. He doesn't want Dean coming back to Hell. You should have seen him when I found him." Castiel tried not to laugh at the memory of leading Crowley around like a dog on a leash. He sobered quickly when he remembered doing the same thing to Dean just hours ago.

"Then I'm going to start the cure. If Crowley is scared of Dean, he'll find a way to get rid of the Mark and if he doesn't, I will. I'm not going to lose him again." Sam got to his feet and Castiel followed. "So, how should I do this whole confession thing? We don't have a church. Can I just confess to you?"

"You already did, Sam."

"What? No, I didn't." Sam gave him a puzzled look.

"Yesterday you confessed to me why you had to be the one to save Dean. There's nothing you can say after that to make your blood any purer." Castiel clasped him by the shoulder. "You're ready, Sam."

Sam took a deep breath. "I hope so."

Dean ceased his yelling when Sam poked his head through the door. The kid looked like shit, death on a cracker.

"Is this when the fun begins?" Dean eyed the syringe in Sam's hand. "Do you really think that's gonna work on me?"

"Yes."

Dean sneered. "Come on, Sam. You're supposed to be the smart one. I'm not your average demon."

"Maybe not but you're still a demon." Dean heard the doubt in Sam's voice. He had no idea if this would work, which gave Dean hope.

"I'm also still you're brother. Do you really want to make me suffer?"

Sam hesitated. "You're not my brother."

Dean laughed. "You keep saying it but you know it's not true. I'm fine with this, Sammy. It's who I was meant to be."

"No, it's not." Sam inched closer to him and Dean could see fear etched with unbearable pain on his brother's face. "You were a good man, Dean, a good brother. I know that man is still in there somewhere."

"If that story helps you sleep at night, then okay." He peered at his brother. "But I don't think you've been sleeping very much."

"Whose fault is that?"

Dean chuckled. "I missed you, Sammy. I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"Then send me a card next time and stay the hell out of my head!" Sam moved so quickly Dean didn't have time to react before the needle was plunged into his neck. Too late, he made a grab for his brother but the collar around his neck limited his movements. Castiel had made sure to give him no slack. He could barely move.

As Sam hurried from the room, slamming the door behind him, Dean screamed: "IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK, SAMMY!"

Dean began to laugh loudly as he heard Sam weeping on the other side of the door.

"YOU CAN'T SAVE ME, SAMMY! YOU NEVER COULD!"

"Sam, it's time."

Sam jerked awake at the sound of Castiel's voice. Somehow, even with all of Dean's yelling, he'd managed to doze off. He'd been dreaming. It was a dream from his childhood, more like a series of memories…...Dean walking him to school, Dean cooking his dinner, Dean giving him advice on girls. Dean had been more than a brother to him. He'd been a father, a mother, a best friend…...his world. What he had to face now was not his brother. He had to remember that. It was the only way he could finish this. His brother was not in that room, but at the end of seven more hours, he would be.

It was almost time for injection number seven and up until thirty minutes ago, Dean had still been yelling every obscenity he could imagine at the top of his lungs and unfortunately, he had a good imagination.

"It's almost over, Sam." Castiel said encouragingly.

Castiel had been keeping a close eye on him. Sam knew he was still worried about the possibility of the procedure resuming the trials but Sam felt fine…...if you could call exhausted, terrified, and slightly drunk fine. He grimaced as he swallowed the last of his drink, wondering how many he'd had.

He grabbed the syringe from the table and jabbed it into his vein. The irony of his blood being able to cure a demon suddenly struck him. His blood had been tainted by demon blood since he was six months old but he'd felt as though the trials had been purifying him, cleansing him of the burden he'd been forced to bear. Was that true? Had he been cleansed? He hadn't given it much thought until now but he had seen the effect it had on Crowley. Confession wouldn't have done anything to his blood unless…...

Unless it was human blood.

He began to laugh while tears ran down his cheeks.

"Sam, are you okay?"

"I'm better than I've been in years, Cas."

Castiel seemed doubtful.

"I'm fine, Cas." He stood up, syringe gripped tightly in his hand. "Open the door."

As Sam approached Dean, he appeared to be sleeping.

Demons don't sleep.

"Dean?"

Dean raised his head and Sam braced himself for the barrage of obscenities that was sure to follow.

"Sammy?"

Are those tears in his eyes?

"Yeah, Dean."

"Do you remember what our lives used to be like before?"

"Before what?"

"Before demons, before angels." Dean gazed at him earnestly. "We used to have good times, didn't we?"

Sam nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. "Yeah, we did."

"I shouldn't have messed with your head, Sammy."

You still are, Dean. Only this time Sam wasn't sure if it was Dean's intention.

"I'm going to give you another injection." Sam held up the syringe for him to see.

"I know."

Sam approached his brother (not my brother, not yet) cautiously. Every other time he'd had to dart in quickly and jab the needle into his neck but this time all of Dean's fight seemed to be gone. Was the cure working or had Dean just found a different mind game to play? He knew how this process worked. He could use it against Sam.

When Sam got close enough to administer the dose, Dean only stared at him with tear-filled eyes. As he watched his blood drain into his brother's neck, he said, "I'm going to save you."

Sam flinched as Dean's eyes flashed black. "That's what you said when I went to Hell the first time."

"SAMMY, I'M SORRY!"

For the last hour Dean had done nothing but plead with him through the door. He'd begged for Sam's forgiveness, begged for his release, and had even begged Sam to kill him. The sound of it simultaneously broke Sam's heart and filled it with joy.

As he extracted the last syringe from his arm, he knew without a doubt in just a matter of minutes, he was finally going to be reunited with his brother.

"Sammy, please, make it stop." Dean began pleading with him as soon he opened the door.

Sam held up the syringe. "It's all going to be over soon."

Dean sagged against his restraints. "Thank you, little brother."

Sam trembled at the sound of Dean's voice. It already sounded so much like his brother but he knew he had to complete the cure in order for Dean to be whole.

"Cas, you ready?"

Castiel nodded at his post by the door. It was the only time Sam had allowed Cas to enter with him. He had to have the angel in order to heal Dean's wound. It was the one thing he was unable to do, although he wished with all his heart that he could.

Dean made no attempt to resist as Sam plunged the final dose of blood into his neck. His eyes locked with Sam's as Sam tossed the syringe aside and began reciting the exorcism.

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus. Hanc animan redintegra lustra!"

Sam reached for the knife he had tucked into his back pocket, his eyes never leaving Dean's.

"Finish it, Sammy."

Sam sliced into his palm, barely registering the pain, heart pounding in his chest as he placed his hand over Dean's mouth. Dean screamed against his hand, his back arched in agony as his eyes flashed from black to green.

"Castiel, loosen the neck iron! Hurry!" Sam held his hand firmly in place, transfixed by the war raging in Dean's eyes.

"Sam, I don't think it's a good idea."

"It's going to choke him!" cried Sam. "Do it now!"

Castiel unfastened Dean's chain from the wall but didn't remove the collar from his neck. Dean collapsed to the floor, pulling Sam with him.

"Cas!"

Castiel knelt beside Dean and placed his hand on Dean's chest. Sam retrieved the key for the neck iron and removed it from his brother's neck. As he reached for the cuffs, Castiel shook his head.

"Just in case."

"You saw him, Cas. It was Dean."

Dean remained unresponsive on the floor and Castiel frowned.

"Dean, hey, come on." Sam held his brother's shackled hands in both of his own. "Come back to me, Dean. You gotta come back to me. Please."

"It's not working, Sam."

"THEN KEEP TRYING!" cried Sam. "Come on, Dean, please….."

Dean's eyes flew open and he gulped in a great breath of air. "S-Sammy?"

"Yeah, Dean, it's me." Sam smiled.

"Sammy, what…..." Sam saw the realization of everything that had happened cross Dean's face in a matter of seconds. The eyes that had been black only moments before were now bright green and shining with tears.

"What have I done?" whispered Dean.

"Dean, it's gonna be okay." Sam gently reached for his brother's hands to free them but Dean scooted backwards across the floor, scrambling toward the door. Castiel blocked his escape and Dean cried out in anguish.

"Dean…..." Sam approached his brother slowly, again reaching for the cuffs encircling his brother's wrists but Dean jerked away at his touch.

"Don't touch me, Sammy." Dean looked around helplessly, tears coursing down his cheeks. "I don't know what I am. Sammy, I-I don't know w-w-what I am. I've done…..horrible things. The things I d-did to y-you….."

Dean couldn't finish the sentence as sobs overtook him. Sam enfolded his weeping brother in his arms, burying his face in his brother's neck, his own tears mingling with Dean's. Dean moaned against him, his shackled hands clutching at Sam's collar.

"I'm s-sorry, Sammy. 'm so sorry." Dean's moans turned to a wail and Sam held him tight, relishing the feel of Dean's heart beating against his own.

Dean finally pulled away from him, his face tormented by memories of the horrors he'd committed. In a broken voice he asked, "W-what am I, Sammy?"

"You're my brother, Dean." Sam reached for the restraints and this time Dean didn't resist. As the cuffs fell away, Sam grasped his brother's grief-stricken face in both hands, resting his forehead against Dean's. "You're my brother and you're home."

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Until next week...