Gorillaz Song One-Shots

Ch. 10
2Doc: Radio-Friendly Pop Song

Stuart Pot A.K.A 2D took a deep breathe and walked into the well lit vibrant office to see a man with a very practiced, perfect smile placed in his face.

It's a pleasure to meet you my friend, come take a seat at my desk

2D plops down into the chair across from the well dressed man, who seemed to never stop smiling. He already didn't like him.

I gotta tell ya kid, the whole team is more-than-impressed
Your melodies soar and all of your choruses shine

"Listen Mr. Pot," the man started. "Everyone is in love with your angelic voice that speaks volumes."

That made 2D smile slightly.

The lyrics are sound and your voice is fundamentally fine

"Every lyric you sing comes out perfect and sound." 2D started beaming.

But face it, if you wanna make it onto radio kid, you gotta do as I say

"You have to do everything I say if you want to be a star kid."

2D started to lose his delicate smile. Did he know? Of course he knew.

Change all the 'him's into 'her's
And just don't tell the world that you're...SHHH!

"Just don't tell anyone your a fag." 2D had a look of utter despair and horror on his face. "Get a girlfriend, change any guys into girls and don't say a word." The very idea made him think of a man with mismatched eyes and green tinted skin waiting for him back home.

Happy to help, take my card, please think about what I've said
But this is an industry where people make money, so your art has to sell
And you should never seek to challenge an audience

The man handed him a laminated white card with his information on it. "Think about it kid, don't challenge the audience, just get a girlfriend and don't speak a word and your art is going to sell."

That thought really made 2D think.

They buy what they're told and we never get it wrong
Go write us a non-offensive, tasteful, conventional song...

"Go write a beautiful song about your new girlfriend," the man smiled and 2D blew lightly at a lock of blue hair that fell in front of his face. He couldn't imagine doing that.

Like this one:
Girls like boys and boys like girls
And that's the way it should be
Forever

"Just remember Stuart: boys like girls and girls like boys, and nothing is going to change that." 2D had tears welling up in his eyes. Memories of him and that green skinned man flashed through his mind. Meeting, talking, laughing, hugging...kissing...fucking...loving each other.

Welcome to tinsel town kid, I'm gonna make you a star
You got the fire in your gut and everything that you need to go far
You're a talented guy, you could shake Hollywood to the ground
And with us on your side, plus your looks, you're gonna conquer this town

"You have fire and determination in you that will be the embers of your career. You'll go far and bring Hollywood to its knees."

But face it; if you wanna break into this business kid, you gotta play the part
And you'll never play a leading man if you let on to your fans the truth about who you are

"But they'll never accept them for who you are so play the part." The tears started rolling from 2D's blood-filled eyes but the man didn't noticed as he continued talking.

Just remember that...
Girls like boys and boys like girls
And that's the way it has been
Forever

2D sat their for a good 20 minutes as the man went on and on and on talking.

Yeah, girls like boys and boys like girls
And that's the way it will be
Forever

Why wouldn't he just shut up?

On the radio
In Hollywood
On the TV shows
For the greater good
He said, "think about the children, think about the children"

2D had a lot to think about as he let that office and went home. His husband, Murdoc, stood on the porch waiting for his return.

"So? How'd it go?"

You wanted me to write a hit record for the radio
Are you never gonna get it?
The kids already know...

2D wrote a song with his beloved husbands help. A song that was going to take the world by storm. They'd show everyone.

Some girls like girls, some boys got a boyfriend
I like guys and they like me
We hold hands, make out do all the things that lovers do

2D relished in the horror on that smiling man's face after he saw it when 2D showed him the video they made. He couldn't even do anything about it now. It was uploaded to YouTube this morning. So what if he was gay? So what if he liked men? He could still succeed with his music career and he would.

Girls like boys and boys like girls
And that's the way it has been
Forever
Yeah, girls like boys and boys like girls
And that's the way it will be—
Whatever!

It was his damn life anyways.