Shit.
Here I was again. The pain twisted inside my stomach as the feeling I knew all to well returned. It had been a year since I had last seen Sora, and it had been a year since I had started feeling alive again. Everyday I felt regret for what I did, and every day I thought of the one I watched leave. Curiosity was there as well. Had he ever finished the story? If he did, did he care? And if he didn't…did it matter? There was no way for me to tell. It was KILLING me not knowing what he was doing… how he was doing. I didn't even know what part of Italy he was in. But the question that continuously ate at me, was if it would have worked… I know that a good part of me wished that once I was published, he would decide that he didn't care. But inside I knew that it wouldn't have been ok. He would have been just as angry if I would have told him, as he was finding it on his own. I know it was my choice to write something like I did, and part of me still believes that I should have kept it, rather then leave it at his house. Still…I wished he would have let me explain.
When I came to him, I was just some guy who wanted to find out what it was like living with someone as spontaneous and…. flaming, as him. I was fresh out of college, doing part time journalism, and when the idea of a novel was presented to me, I immediately went to my notes. Throughout college I had wrote down things that might have interested me. I'd always been attracted to fictional stories and being able to entertain. I figured that if I wanted to write a fictional story, I would need someone to inspire me. Besides, who wouldn't be interested in finding what would happen if a straight guy lived with a gay guy? Sure, I was living with Axel, and he would have been a project worth trying, and for a moment I almost used him! But once Tidal Wave told me about Sora, I knew I couldn't pass this chance up. Almost immediately I started working on a plan; a way to get into Sora's apartment without any questions being asked.
Business was a surefire, unquestionable reason to be down in Sora's part of California. Lucky for me, it was near Axel's place, and mine so I wouldn't need to pack all of my research stuff with me.
So there I was. Sitting at the top of the best idea I had ever come up with for a story, when something completely unexpected happened.
Love.
Axel had always told me that living with him would change me, and that I wouldn't stay straight forever. Of course I just disregarded his opinion on the subject of my sexuality, though it might have done me some good to listen to him. Maybe it wouldn't have come as such a shock the first time my heart stopped when looking at Sora. That first time, was the time that Sora and I were sitting like idiots in the kitchen with ice packs on our heads. I didn't know what came over me, but when he touched my leg…something just clicked.
At first I wanted to leave. I wanted to take the information I had, and leave. I didn't want to ruin my weeks of planning for some silly feeling. And even though I knew it wouldn't end happily, I stayed. I couldn't bring myself to leave. I didn't want to.
That was probably why I couldn't feel anything but regret and self pity…and pain.
So, here I was again, the feelings of over a year ago fresh in my mind. I might have just broken down. Yea…right there in the middle of the bookstore. If it weren't for the newfound anger that came along with the other feelings, I was pretty sure I would have. I was standing in the fiction section of the local bookstore I always went to, when I found it. My book.
The one I wrote, and didn't publish because I left the information with Sora. Yes, the same information Sora had "disposed of".
Skittles and a Ferret.
When I had come up with that name, I had intended to change it. It was sort of a… placeholder for a much better title; one I would come up with later. Plucking the book from the shelf, I opened it up to the front page: The acknowledgements page. I scanned down the list of names and reasons, until I came to the very last one.
One I hadn't written.
" And most of all, thanks to Kairi Skires for getting this published for me when I was unavailable. I love her lots!"
Love her lots? Who did she think she was? How in the hell did she get her stupid little hands on MY book!? Who told her she could do that? What fucking publishing company LET her do that!? I would have to push the painful feelings aside while I took care of that stupid bitch.
Closing the book, I tucked it under my arm and walked to the cash register. After paying for it, though I wrote it, I walked outside into the sun filled shopping area and over to the benches. Sitting down on an empty one, I started flipping through the pages of the book, remembering the things I wrote as I saw it. Once I got the end, the last chapter I stopped. Here it was. My explanation. The reason why I did what I did, and the one thing that might make Sora hate me less.
And yes, it was only Sora I wanted to make hate me less.
After the party, things were kind of chaotic. Axel and I were kicked out of our homes, and we were forced to go back to our old apartment. Of course, we both got insanely drunk and weren't conscious for an extremely long time, but we got over that the day Roxas came over and kicked out asses.
Eventually Roxas got over it, letting Axel move back in with him, and soon after, he forgave me, but what good did that do me? It wasn't Roxas I wanted to forgive me. It was my Sora. Anyway, as for Tidus, he was still living under Roxas and Axel's roof. He could have been out of there already, but with the diner chick he met and his house troubles, he didn't exactly have the will power to leave yet. Plus he enjoyed living with someone for a change.
--
I closed the book; looking at the back- this only worsened my anger. Near the upper left corner was a small black and white picture of me, next to a short summary.
Not only would Sora know what I wrote, but now the entire world would be in on my secret. How was I supposed to fix something like that?
Well let the Geek in the Pink take a stab at it,
If you're liking' what ya see, baby wink at it..
I pulled my cell phone from my pocket and pushed the "Ok" button, pressing it to my ear.
"Hello?"
"Did you see the book yet?"
"Tidus? You saw it?! Why didn't you-"
"Shut up for a second. Sora is a good friend of mine, and you said he wouldn't get hurt. Hurry and go fix this problem before he finds the published copy of your mistake. You should know by now what to do. If not, then you don't deserve Sora anyway."
Click.
I stared down at the screen of my phone, my jaw very close to dropping. I thought about what he said for a moment, and with that, I was on my way. It only took me a few minutes to wave down a Taxi and tell him my destination. Where I was going, I wasn't sure was where I should be headed. I was confused and disoriented, and my methods of fixing problems weren't exactly orthodox, but I didn't know any other way. I was a dumb ass in love and I wasn't about to let things end now.
As I arrived at my destination, I threw a wad of cash at the driver, not counting the bills. I leapt out of the car and ran inside automatic doors. As if fate were, for some reason unknown to me, on my side, there were only two people in the line I needed to be in. I sprinted threw the crowds of people before entering my designated line. Once it was my turn to make my purchase, I took a second to catch my breath. I didn't want to think because chances were I would talk myself out of doing this, so instead I stepped up to the counter.
"One ticket to Venice Italy please."
A/n- I feel awful for leaving you all for so long. I don't have a good excuse really so I'm not going to make one. As you all know, this is chapter ten. The last chapter of my Skittles. I hope you enjoyed reading my story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I love every one who read it even if you didn't like it. :D
I have a surprise.
The answer to all of the confusing parts such as "Tidal Wave" and "Axel and Riku living together."
100 Days is the Prequel to Skittles and a Ferret. You have to read it to understand those confusing parts. :D
I have another surprise.
There is something coming.
Something by the name of….-drumroll-…..SEQUEL!
3 you all
--Ten-Second-Tom