A/N: This mini-chap is a bit sappy. Just a conversation between Shep and the Doctor over lost loves. Definite Shweir and Ten/Rose. I just think those are really good fit for the characters. I'm not against Sheyla, but I favor Shweir. Here it is.

Reflections

Note to self: 900 year old aliens with nothing to do are dangerous. I ducked as something sparked in the TARDIS's consoles as the Doctor fiddled with some aspect of his ship's computer. I wearily asked the TARDIS, Is this normal?

Yes. Very. He gets bored so it gives him something to do and it makes me feel special when he gives me attention. The disembodied voice of the TARDIS answered. The fact I was talking to a ship was not lost on me. I thought back to when I finally decided to look at the strange blue box supposedly stored in one of our storage rooms.

***

"You travel in that? It's a bit small." I pointed out to the Doctor. He just rolled his eyes.

"Humans. Always thinking that what you see is what you get." He sighed in exasperation. In response I looked harder at the seemingly plain blue Police Public Call Box. Suddenly my eyesight shifted. I nearly tripped as I started backing up. Like a ghost of an image there was a massive ship connected to the innocent-looking doors. The ship seemed to ignore Atlantis and it faded straight into the walls, continuing for untold lengths. I gaped and my eyes almost crossed in an attempt to see both the Call Box and the actual ship. The Doctor looked at me curiously. "What?"

"I can see it! How does that thing fit in here? It's enormous." I was in awe. The TARDIS was at least half the size of the city and it was sitting conveniently in one of our storage rooms. I blinked and the image was gone, leaving the blue box. I turned to him. "What was that?"

"You could see it? Amazing. Evidently you possess the ability to see alternate dimensions at will. That's brilliant." His eyes shined at this information. "Oh, and that's the TARDIS. It's trans-dimensional. On this dimension, it's a blue box while another dimension has the ship. They're connected. For your purposes you can say it's bigger on the inside. I find most humans will go with that."

"Wow." I rubbed my eyes then watched as he pulled a golden key out his pocket. He inserted in the lock. "Just a key?"

"Yep. Used to have a bio-scanner to let only me and people with me in, but as the TARDIS grew up, I decided it wasn't necessary. Really this key is just a formality. Even if you have the key, the TARDIS isn't about to let a stranger in without my approval. She's sentient after all." He opened the door. My head almost exploded. The singing from before the barrier broke was back with a vengeance. My eyes filled with tears and I nearly cried. I usually wasn't one to cry, but this music was pure emotion, mainly sorrow and a deep sense of loneliness and loss. It was a lament for the dead. I instantly remembered the Doctor's heartbroken recollection of his people's demise. The ship had a reason for such a mournful song: it and its operator were the last of their kinds. The song was haunting, yet eerily beautiful. The Doctor noticed my vacant expression and grabbed my arm. "I wondered about that. You can hear it, can't you?"

"Yes." I whispered. At that last statement, the TARDIS's song changed drastically. Suddenly the music was joyous and frantic. I listened in wonder. I caught fragments of words.

You… here! … Help him… find…. The TARDIS sounded happy and expectant. I wasn't sure what she was asking, but I tried o soothe her.

I'll do what I can to help. I promised.

"It's OK, girl. Calm down. I'm sure the Colonel would like to be able to hear after he leaves." The Doctor patted a control lovingly. The TARDIS's voice slowed accordingly. Finally she was a mere hum in the back of my mind, extremely similar to the feel of Atlantis when I was in the city. I filed that fact away for future reference. "She likes you."

"Well, what can I say? I'm just one of those guys. Don't tell Rodney though. He'll have a field day with it. He already calls me Kirk; you don't need to fuel the fire." I joked. The Doctor chuckled politely then began to mess with one of the panels.

"I'm just gonna do a little maintenance. Took a hard landing when I got in your universe, don't want that to come back and bite me." He grabbed a strange silver cylinder with a blue tip. When he pushed a button it came to life. A blue light and a slight hum emanated from it. At my curious look he grinned. "Sonic screwdriver. Never leave home without it."

***

"So when you he calls you Kirk…" The Doctor's voice from under the controls jarred me out of my memory. I sighed.

"Rodney has an active imagination. Yes, girls do tend to fall for me, but I don't go looking for it. When we first got here, Teyla, the woman who had the baby, trusted me more than my CO at the time because I didn't look through her and saw her as an equal. Smart thing, too, 'cause she can kick my butt at stick fighting. Then later we met Chaya. She was the Ascended who healed me when my parents had to leave to fix the barrier; though we didn't know she was ascended at the time. She's exiled by the Council to protect her planet. It doesn't sound that bad, but she can only protect her planet. For someone who cares about humans, it's a curse to sit by and watch the rest of the worlds get ravaged by the Wraith. She was lonely. When we came to investigate her planet and learned that they had never experienced a culling, we went to talk to the High Priestess for their "god" Athar. It was Chaya in disguise. She walked among her people to feel their innocence. But she came back to Atlantis to spend time with me. I didn't want to believe Rodney's claims that she was something other than human. When she finally had to admit that she was ascended but couldn't help us, she told the entire conference room she came to see me. Then the Wraith attacked her planet and she went back to face them. I followed to help if I could and we shared. You wouldn't believe how long Rodney went around saying I had glowy sex. Finally Sam told him he was wrong when Chaya was here." I shook my head. "Then there was Teer. She was nice and really wise and all, but not only did she end up ascending, but she wasn't for me. She didn't know anything about me besides my face. It never would have worked out. And Mara? She was a snob. Don't get me wrong, she was hot and all for me, but she only wanted me for my ability to control Ancient tech. I really don't understand how people see Larrin as a conquest, because she really kidnapped me. And had me beaten. While she was good-looking, she was an egotistical and ruthless woman. Not gonna happen."

"You really did have a lot of female encounters, didn't you?" The Doctor stared at me. I smirked and shrugged. "But I know someone who's even worse than that. Captain Jack Harkness. Mind you, he's not really a captain. He stole the identity of a man in 1941. Used to be a con man. I don't understand how he can flirt by saying hello. And let me tell you, because he's an ex-Time Agent from the 51st century, he is very diverse. If that's what you call it here. He hit on both Rose and me when we first met him. I suppose he was normal for the time period he came from, but he was an eye opener to travel with."

"Rose? Isn't she the one who got stuck in the parallel universe?" I asked. His face gained a sadder look and his voice grew soft.

"Yes." He looked away. "She was special. Human, but she had so much compassion. She stopped me from killing a Dalek. It almost killed her, but she saw that it was mutating. It had used her DNA to repair itself and in doing so, it contained a tiny sliver of Rose Tyler in it. And it figured out that killing wasn't everything. It learned to love and it learned what freedom means. And she saved it from me. I was never more ashamed. A simple human was a better person than I was. She fixed me. And I lost her. So many friends over so many years and I never told the one person who really mattered the most that I loved her. I used the energy of a supernova to say good-bye and when it came down to it, I couldn't say what I needed to in time. I was an idiot."

"I know how that feels." At his raised eyebrows I explained. "I let regulations and people's expectations to put off telling someone that I cared for them. She's gone, lost to the Replicators. And what's worst? I was forced to say goodbye when I was running away. I left her behind. She could be dead."

"Who was it? If you don't mind my asking." The Doctor leaned back against one of the supports and watched me carefully. I considered his request.

"Dr. Elizabeth Weir. Former expedition head." I replied gruffly. He nodded. Suddenly he jumped up and started wandering through the ship. I hesitantly followed. After several twists and turns we arrived at a small kitchen with various appliances and cabinets. From one cabinet he pulled out two wine glasses; from another, a bottle of wine.

"This wine is vintage 1947. I've had it a tad longer than that, but it'll work." He poured some in each glass and gave one to me. I stared at him. He raised his glass in a toast. "To Rose and Elizabeth. To lost loves."

"To love." I echoed after I realized what he was doing. I sipped my glass. "To Elizabeth."

***

A/N: Awww. The boys are so lost without their girls. I don't know 'bout y'all, but I think it's sweet. I hope you don't feel that Shep's too emotional. I can envision those two kind of hitting it off. Not as much as Rodney and the Doctor, but still good friends.