A/N- I'm so sorry it's taken so long for an update. I know I don't have a huge following, but I still want to apologize. I started a new job and also started reading Isolation by Bex-chan and I was addicted. I also really liked how she gave some song recommendations for her chapters so I thought I'd give it a shot.

A/N Song choice: Yesterday's Feelings- The Used

Leave- Glen Hansard

Chapter 10

He was sitting up against a stack of pillows when she entered through the doorway. His face was relaxed, his eyes closed. Despite the anger she'd been keeping pent up inside, she couldn't help but admire his vulnerable beauty. The door closed behind her, creaking slightly and startling him. Their eyes locked.

"Hermione…," he began, his voice raspy from lack of use. His pale eyes searched her face.

"Draco." She strode to his bed, pulling up a chair and seating herself next to him, sure to leave some distance between them. "How are you feeling?"

"Ok, I guess. I'm a bit nauseous, but Pomfrey says that's normal, considering everything…"

They both fell into a tense silence. Hermione was the first to speak again.

"How could you?" She was looking at him with measured eyes, watching his reaction. These were the only words she could muster.

"How could I what?" He was staring at the bowl in front of him, fiddling with his spoon.

"Do this to yourself, obviously!"

"What's it matter to you? I distinctly remember you saying we should just 'be friends' and that you didn't 'trust me' so why should it matter to you what I do in my free time?"

"If you would have just let me talk instead of acting like an idiot then maybe you'd have heard my explanation."

"I didn't care to hear what you had to say. In case you hadn't noticed, Hermione, I have feelings too. I know that must be so hard to wrap your head around, but it's the truth. God forbid you let go for once. You've been hot and cold with me from the start, basically writing out a pros and cons list in your head every time you got too close to me. How did you expect me to react? One second you're naked in my bed, the next you want nothing to do with me. And people think I'm losing it," he scoffed, staring heatedly at her.

"Well, it was no picnic for me either." She lowered her voice and continued. "In case you'd forgotten, I hadn't ever had...sex… before. And you basically threw me out after I asked you to stop! I felt awful! I still do, as a matter of fact."

"I'd hardly call what occurred between us sex, Hermione. Don't worry, you can still fuck the Weasel without feeling guilty." She was stung by these words. The animosity in the room was palpable. She could see the hate flash behind his cold eyes. He could be very cruel and degrading when he wanted to be.

"I chose you. It was hard, but I'd made up my mind. I still hadn't let go of all inhibitions yet, though I was trying. But now… I don't know what I was thinking! Even if you've changed, you still have that underlying callousness. I could never be with someone who's first instinct is to hurt me." He was shaking his head as she spoke, rolling his eyes. "You act so tough, but you're not! I wish you'd just quit with the facade! You try to look so flawless on the outside but I see right through you, Draco. You are a good person, but you're destroying yourself for things that aren't your fault." She reached for him instinctively but then thought better of it.

"Ok Hermione, I get it. Perfect little Granger, always fixing everyone's problems. You think you can just analyze me and tell me how to cope with my past and everything will all of a sudden be alright? That may be how it works in your cushioned life, but the rest of the world is a lot harsher than you seem to think. Not that it matters anymore because I'm no longer your fucking concern. I don't want your pity and I don't want your psychological analysis. I know I have issues, and there mine to deal with. Alone. I've had enough of your rants for one day. I'm sick of getting scolded." His face was flushed, his lip was curled and he refused to look at her anymore.

"My life is not cushioned. You're not the only one who has nightmares. You're not the only one who's had loss. I just don't see the point of destroying everything in my path because I'm angry at events that are out of my control. Stop acting like a child, Malfoy, and people will stop treating you like one." She stood abruptly, accepting his dismissal of her. "Get it together. Next time, I won't be there to save you."

"Yeah, well I didn't ask you to save me, did I?"

"No, you didn't. That's just who I am." And with that final sentiment, she left the room.

Hermione spent the last couple of days of the holiday in her dorm, exiting only for meals. She was ready for term to start again, so she could get back to her classes and to Dueling Club, knowing that they would take up most of her time. She hadn't heard from Draco at all, but she knew she needed to speak to him, specifically about whether or not he was going to continue teaching with her. If he did, that posed a problem, and if he did not, she would still need to find a replacement which was a problem within itself.

She spotted him for the first time at breakfast on the first day after holiday. He was sitting alone at the table as usual and avoiding eye contact. She knew this because she was purposefully staring at him to try to get his attention. He stayed seated at the table until the bell rang and quickly dodged her by joining the throng of students that stood up at the same time to leave. Futile efforts really, Hermione thought, as they had Potions together first period. When she entered the classroom however, he was seated in the back of the class next to a pretty Slytherin girl who Hermione only knew as Greengrass. She felt a flair in her stomach, watching the two interact. He was smirking at her and she was blushing and succumbing to a fit of giggles. Malfoy shot her a fiery, pointed glance before replacing his charming mask for the girl. Hermione could feel her face burning as she quickly took her seat at the front of class, anger bubbling like a hot cauldron. Parvati Patil had chosen the seat beside hers.

"So," Parvati began, "what's been going on with you and Malfoy?" Hermione looked at her, baffled. She was saved the trouble of responding however, as Professor Slughorn entered the classroom.

"Morning, morning," he said briskly, "The break never seems quite long enough, does it? Oh well, no matter. Please turn to page 186, if you will. This chapter is going to cover Healing potions. We dove into it a bit with the Wiggenweld Potion in first term, but now our studies will become much more extensive. We've got to prepare for your N.E.W.T's, you know. Anyhow, useful as healing potions may be, they can be a bit tricky. Anyone interested in becoming a healer?" A few tentative hands were in the air. "An excellent field of work, good choice ladies and gentlemen. I have taught quite a few exceptional Healers. Why, Hubert Pollingtonious was a pupil of mine! Author of The Healer's Helpmate, as you may know, and still asks for my help when he's developing something new!" His chest puffed out at the mention of one of his numerous famous ex-students. Apparently he'd given up on the Slug Club this year. She'd never heard mention of it and Professor Slughorn wasn't the type to keep things quiet. "Today, we'll be starting the Blood-Replenishing potion. This will take all of your concentration, so pay close attention to the instructions. You have until the end of class to place a labelled phial on top of my desk. You may begin." There was a lot of scuffling as people retrieved ingredients from their bags and began stoking their fires. Some ingredients had to be borrowed from Slughorn's store cupboard as they weren't common in most potions. She waited for Malfoy to rise to get his supplies and she cornered him by the cabinet alone.

"I need to talk to you," she rushed. He glanced over his shoulder, winking at the Greengrass girl, then turned back to Hermione.

"I think you've said enough, Granger. As you can see, I've found a new, more... willing distraction. So, if you'll excuse me." He made to push past her but she stood in his way.

"Look, do what you want. I don't care who you're snogging-"

"Oh, we've been doing more than snogging-"

"Shut up and listen for once. Are you still going to help the Dueling Club or not?" Her knotted stomach was flopping around like a fish on land. She wasn't sure which of his responses she was hoping for.

"Only if you ask nicely." He sneered at her, as if he expected her to beg.

"Forget it. Just forget it. I'll find someone else." She turned on her heels, ingredients in hand, and returned to her seat at the front of class.

By the end of the lesson, there were a lot of frustrated faces and lack luster potions. Hermione was sweaty and mentally exhausted, but proud that she had concocted the only successful batch. Parvati's had never changed from murky brown to the scarlet color it was supposed to be and she was satisfied to see that Malfoy's cauldron was smoking uncontrollably. The two girls placed their phials upon the desk and headed to lunch, both starving after such an excruciating lesson.

"So, are you going to tell me about Malfoy now?" Parvati asked, giving Hermione a sly look. Apparently she hadn't forgotten about their conversation.

"There's nothing to tell. We were friends is all, but we're not anymore," she said with a note of finality.

"Oh come on, you can tell me. I saw you at the supply cabinet. And I saw the way he was flirting with Greengrass. That's not a coincidence. Who am I going to tell? All of my friends have left. You're the only person I know. And you haven't said more than two words to me all year and we live in the same dorm!" Parvati was speaking heatedly, and Hermione noticed a wetness in her eyes. She felt guilty. It's not like her and Parvati had ever been close. She'd never been on the same page as the other girls in her dorms, not having the same kind of interest in boys and clothes that they all had shared. She'd mostly avoided them. And she'd been best friends with Lavender Brown, who had hated her. But Lavender was terribly injured in the battle of Hogwarts and had never returned. Parvati's twin hadn't returned to school, choosing to start her career at the Ministry instead. Hermione decided to confide in the girl.

"Oh alright. But not here. In the dorm later. It's quite a long story." Parvati seemed satisfied with her response and left her alone to eat her fish and chips.

A/N Song choice: Standard Lines- Dashboard Confessional

(Draco)

He watched her back as she left him alone again in the hospital wing, her bushy ponytail swishing fiercely. He'd seen the glimmer of a tear in her eyes, but she'd held it together. He respected her for that, despite the fury he had at her for the lecture she'd just delivered. Awake for a half fucking hour and she was already having a go at him. Like it wasn't her fault he'd ended up here in the first place. It was her actions that pushed him to the state she found him in.

Draco pushed his food to the side, unable to eat another bite of his cold soup. I need a sodding drink, he thought to himself, knowing full well that that was going to be near impossible now. He could thank Granger for that later too.

The search of his personal belongings left a disgusting taste in his mouth. Slughorn left no stone unturned, claiming all of his aged firewhiskey. It would most certainly end up in his own private stash, as Slughorn had an affinity for the refined and Draco drank nothing but the best. Never in his life had Draco had his privacy violated in such a way. His anger for Hermione was beginning to overwhelm him as he watched the contents of his drawers get dumped to the floor, yet he had no way to release any of this tension thanks to her.

No way, that is, until the rest of the Slytherins returned from holiday and his eyes fell upon the slender figure of Daphne Greengrass. She'd been friends with Parkinson when he'd been shagging her briefly, but he doubted she'd mind that little transgression of his. The Slytherin girls were competitive and he was definitely the most eligible of the Pureblood bachelors. He was sure Greengrass would view him as a prize to be won. Their eyes locked and she gave him a sassy smirk, a mischievous glint in her dark eyes. She looked willing enough, Draco thought to himself smugly. Let the games begin.

Daphne was easier to coerce than he'd anticipated, which was disappointing to Draco. One of the things he'd enjoyed about Granger was the chase. As much as she'd infuriated him with all of her virtue and indecisiveness, it had driven him mad with desire. Daphne had tugged him up to his room hours after her arrival back to school. He'd been more than willing to follow, after all of the build up that Granger had left him with. Once the door to the room was shut, she'd pounced on him, her teeth clashing with his, her tongue forcing itself into his mouth. It took him by surprise at first and he'd almost pushed her away. Then his natural instincts had taken over and he returned her kisses with equal vigor. Before he knew what was happening, she'd stripped down to nothing and was lowering herself to her knees, unzipping his trousers and slipping her lips around his throbbing member. He closed his eyes, allowing his mind to drift away. All he could think about was Hermione. Her innocent body lying beneath him, quivering and nervous. Her natural, unwavering beauty. That little pink mouth and those supple lips. Then he pictured her pushing him away, rejecting him. Draco's eyes shot open, angry at himself for thinking of Granger when he had Greengrass's lips wrapped around his cock. He pulled Daphne onto the bed and bent her over, entering her angrily from behind and slamming her face into the pillow. He gripped her hair and thrust hard and fast into her, a moan of pleasure escaping her lips. She let out a series of screams, that Draco found ridiculous and most likely fake, but he didn't care. This wasn't about her. He needed this release and he'd use her as long as he needed to. He pumped into her steadily until he felt himself finish. He pulled out and reached for his trousers, finished with Greengrass and hoping she'd take the hint. She lifted her face from the pillow, watching him with a smile on her face. She was obviously comfortable with herself, lying there naked in front of him. Her breasts were much bigger than Granger's, he noted. He walked over and cupped them in his hands. She was already tugging at his pants again, writhing on the bed and begging for more. Draco shrugged and removed his pants again. He wasn't the type to deny himself pleasure.

Daphne had tried to stay in his bed that night, but he'd managed to kick her out without tarnishing his chances of shagging her again later. She'd looked disappointed but he knew she'd be back. He found himself alone in bed, once again thinking of Hermione. As much as he'd enjoyed his little romp with Greengrass, he couldn't help the feeling of guilt he had in his stomach. He'd wished it was Granger with him a number of times that evening, especially when he was forced to have a conversation with Daphne. He'd drifted away from her superficial words, her voice lulling him into a comatose state. She never got offended though. She would never dare argue with him. He hated how much he missed Granger already and Daphne made it both better and worse.

On the first day back for term, Malfoy made it a point to ignore Granger as much as possible. He could feel her eyes upon him at breakfast. He'd ducked behind the first group of students that passed him when the bell rang and met up with Greengrass in Potions, making sure to be seen flirting with her when Granger walked through the doors. Her face fell instantly, he'd noted, but she had regained composure like a professional, taking her usual seat at their desk. Her desk now, he thought sullenly.

He'd thought throwing Greengrass in her face would make him feel like he'd beaten her, but he'd been wrong. It wasn't nearly as satisfying as he'd anticipated. And when she'd refused to beg him to participate in Dueling Club, his heart had sunk. He wanted her to want him as badly as he wanted her. He wanted Hermione to grab him right there in class and kiss him, to claim him. But there was a small part of him that knew, if she had, he'd have pushed her away, rejecting her as she'd done to him. Draco's heart and mind were becoming equally unstable.