For the ladies xx

'Hello Patrick.' She smiled as she opened the door to him

'Hello Shelagh.' He smiled back at her. The residents of Nonnatus House had gone to visit Chummy in the hospital, no births were scheduled for the morning so they had all left except Shelagh who had been deemed too fragile, too at risk, to visit the hospital. She had phoned Patrick and he had agreed to come around so they could finally have the much-needed talk, the talk they had been building towards for many months now. Even now, over 12 hours since the dramatic events that had unfolded between them, neither could believe they were finally in a position to have this talk. They stared at each other in awe. He cleared his throat.

'Can I come in?'

'Oh. Right. Yes of course. Come on in.' She stepped aside blushing deeply. They walked through to the sitting room. 'Would you like a cup of tea?

'Please.' She hurried through to the kitchen and grasped the counter. Why was she suddenly so nervous? There was no question anymore of where they stood with each other. They loved each other. They wanted to be together. So why did she feel so queasy? Was she having second thoughts? No. If there was one thing she was sure of it was that she wanted to be with him for the rest of her life. And what a different life it would be from the life she had thought she would live for so long. Gone was the ambitions of Sister Bernadette, no longer would she be able to take over the running of Nonnatus House and be the Sister-In-Charge, no longer would she be able to dedicate her life solely to Him. Now there were two new hims in her life. And oh how she loved them both. She may have lost prestigious nun status, she may have scuppered Sister Julienne's post-retirement plans but she had gained so much. Her new men already meant so much to her and they would only continue to grow in her heart. But it was so different from what she knew. What is she messed up? What if she couldn't be as good a wife, for she was sure that was the endgame of this pursuit, as Marie had been. What if she failed as a stepmother? What if she was too harsh on Tim and he came to resent her or she was too lenient and Tim became bad and Patrick blamed her? Her life so far had made her woefully under prepared for this new path.

'Shelagh?' Patrick appeared in the doorway behind her. She spun around. 'Are you okay?'

'I'm fine.' She smiled strainedly at him.

'You've been staring at the kettle for three minutes.'

'Have I?' She blushed

'Yes. What's wrong?' He took a few hesitant steps towards her, careful not to spook her by lunging towards her and wrapping her in his arms and crushing her to him as he so dearly wished to do. She had been a nun, he reminded himself, yesterdays overt affection may have stemmed more from her relief at his words and the stress of Nurse Noakes' hospitalisation than from her natural affectionateness.

'Nothing. Honestly.' She smiled tightly though he could see the trouble brewing behind her gaze.

'Are you having second thoughts?' Her face struck horrified at his question. She lurched forwards to stand feet from him. She stared up at him imploringly as she responded.

'No! Absolutely not. I couldn't be more certain. You?'

'I am completely certain.'

'Good.'

'Come here.' He stretched out his arms and she fell into them once more. He dropped a kiss into her hair. 'My darling what is it? What troubles you? I only want to be able to help you.

'It's just so overwhelming. I was a nun and now I'm here with you. I've never been happier, I love you so much, but yesterday I woke up as sister Bernadette then I was Shelagh walking to a future with you then you never appeared and I was Shelagh whose future was unknown then Shelagh who was heartbroken and then I was finally in your arms and it just... I can't quite believe this is real.'

'Oh my love I'm sorry. We can take this as slowly as you want. I want you to be comfortable.'

'I am comfortable, I'm just nervous. I don't want to mess this up. And I don't want this to go at any particular speed. I want it to happen as it happens. I know I'm not about to change my mind and I hope you aren't either.'

'Never.'

'And we can't hide it from the others. You professing your undying love for me and then me kissing you in front of them was a bit too noticeable for that.'

'Just a little bit maybe.' They laughed. 'Now let's make that cup of tea and have a talk.'

'Okay.'

Reviews appreciated xxx