Chapter 10

Katniss

I wake up feeling like my stomach is about to come out of my throat. I throw the cover off me as I swing my legs over the bed and run towards the bathroom. I get to the toilet just in time. When I'm finished puking, I groan and stand up. I flush the toilet and walk up to the sink and wash my mouth and brush my teeth. I look in the mirror and see that I'm pale, but also that my face color is starting to get back now when I don't feel sick anymore.

This is starting to get annoying. I've felt sick for a long time now. For like two months, soon three. Maybe I should just go to the doctor. Prim has been telling me to do so for a week now. I think I'm going to follow Prim's advice and just go to the doctor.

So after I walk out of the bathroom I pick up the phone and call. I get a time at 12:10 pm today. I walk into the kitchen where Prim is eating a cheese and ham sandwich. I also see that Haymitch is here. And he's smelling bad of alcohol. So imagine my surprise when he now wrinkle his nose as I walk into the kitchen.

"Have you been sleeping in a trashcan sweetheart?" He asks.

"Yeah Katniss you stink puke", Prim says and wrinkle her nose.

I think we're both so used to Haymitch smell that it doesn't really bother our noses anymore. But when I stink everyone reacts.

I roll my eyes. "I am going to take a shower I was just going to tell you that I have time at the doctors at 12:10 pm today", I say trying not so sound offended.

"Okay you've told us, now go shower and scrub yourself four times okay sweetheart?" Haymitch says.

"Why you little..." I start but Prim interrupts me.

"Shower! Katniss", she says and points at the doorway.

I roll my eyes and stomp out of the kitchen and towards the bathroom. How dare Haymitch say those things to me when he smells like he hasn't taken a shower in at least one hundred years. I take the shower and the next time I come into the kitchen Prim tells me that I smell like coconut and that she likes it.

"How's it going with lover boy?" Haymitch asks when I sit down beside him by the kitchen island.

I glance at him and then look at my water glass before taking a sip of it.

"Have you done it yet?" He asks slyly.

"Haymitch if you don't shut up I'm going to make your head fit into that bottle of yours", I threat referring to the beer bottle he has in one of his hands.

"You wouldn't dare", he challenge me.

"Wanna bet?" I ask slyly.

"Oh come on guys, knock it off", Prim says tired of hearing us all the time.

"Only for you princess", Haymitch says and I roll my eyes at him as I turn to the bowl of fruit and take up a green apple. I take a big bite of it. Green apples are the only apples I like. It tastes sour and sweet at the same time, and are so good. And bonus it's green, my favorite color. What is there not to like about green apples?

I continue to argue with Haymitch during the morning until I have to go to get in time for my appointment.

When I get to the hospital I register and sit down to wait until a doctor comes out and call my name. As I sit here I have time to get nervous. What if I am seriously sick? What if I am deadly sick? Okay that would be me overreacting, but seriously, what if I am sick. I don't want to be sick.

It's not good for me to sit in a hospital and think things through, I get way too dramatic and predict my own death like seven times before I actually get to see the doctor. God I'm pathetic. Oh well.

"Katniss Everdeen", I hear someone call and I look up.

A doctor stands there looking around. I stand up and he sees me and smiles. I smile back. I didn't know I would get Haymitch old friend.

"Beetee", I say in a happy voice.

I follow him into his room and when we're there I give him a big hug. I haven't seen Beetee in ages.

"How great to see you", I say.

"Yeah it's good to see you too Katniss", he smiles. "Although I don't think you're here to see me... What's wrong?"

So I sit down in a chair, Beetee sits down in his, and I explain everything about my problems to him.

"Oh I see..." He says thoughtfully, it looks like he already knows what's wrong with me. "Could you lay down here Katniss?" He point at the bed.

"Yeah", I say and lay down.

He starts to feel on my stomach. "I know this is a sensitive question Katniss, but, have you had sex lately? Are you sexually active?" He asks as he feels.

It takes me a while, but I explain about everything on Mallorca, he's after all a doctor and is sworn to secrecy.

"I understand..." He says thoughtfully.

He puts some jell on my stomach and does something with a machine. "Yeah I thought so", he mumbled as he looks at a screen.

"What?" I ask worried.

"Katniss... You're pregnant", he says.

My whole world starts spinning. Pregnant?! No way it can't be... Okay well I guess it can be possible after all. I remember the day after Peeta and I... Yeah. Oh god.

"What?" I say in a choked voice.

"You're pregnant", he says. "About two months I would say, maybe three".

"Are you sure? Can you check again?" I ask not wanting to believe what he says.

"Katniss you're pregnant", he says again and dries off the jell.

I sit up.

"Are you sure?" I ask again.

"Katniss I'm sure", he says.

"Oh my god", I mumble and put my face into my hands. "Oh my god, oh my god".

This is not happening.

"I'm sorry Katniss", Beetee says.

Yeah...

"Sure", I say trying not to panic. "Well thanks, I'll call you later or I'll tell Haymitch to call you".

I stand up and walk out, not waiting for Beetee to say anything back.

What am I gonna do? I can't destroy Peeta's life, but I can't kill a life either. I never wanted children and now I'm pregnant. I don't understand. Why is this happening?

On my way home from the hospital I try to think everything through. On the bus I see a mom and a dad with a stroller. They're not too young maybe twenty five or twenty six or something. They seem happy. The mother is now taking up their baby. A boy from what I can see. The father looks happily at his girlfriend or wife and their son.

I don't think that can ever be Peeta and I. It doesn't feel like it's possible. We're too young as it is right now. But yet, as I see that baby, I can imagine how my baby may look like, and I feel even stronger about never wanting to do an abortion. Maybe I can let it get adopted...?

When I walk off the bus I feel how it has started to rain. I stop in my moves and looks up at the gray sky and now whole face get wet of the water. I walk slowly, trying to make a decision. When I come into the gatehouse, I know what I have to do. I hurry up the stairs and open the door.

Prim and Haymitch are sitting on the couch. They look at me as I walk through the door. It's dripping water from me down onto the floor, but don't care.

"Pack your bags", I say, looking at them. "We're leaving".