AN: I am very sorry for the delay! I meant to update this last Wednesday. Oops. I was suddenly very busy with actual life and then FF was down ... Anyway thank you for being patient!

It's midnight when her parents force her home. She refuses to leave twice before Robb offers stay the night with Jon, in case he wakes up. They all know he won't, and it's only said to get Arya to leave the hospital.

She showers because she feels like she needs to. She needs to wash off Jon's blood (metaphorically and literally, unfortunately). She needs to wash off Gendry. His scent, his hands, his lips, his mouth… It's all over her.

Her skin is raw by the time she collapses into bed. She closes her eyes with a small sigh and waits for sleep to take her away.

But her mind will not shut up. After three hours of waiting, she knows it's not coming.

Arya pads downstairs into the kitchen. She wants tea. That always helps her sleep, helps her relax. And maybe she'll have a snack. When was the last time she ate anyway?

The lights in the kitchen are on. She comes closer and sees her Dad at the bar sitting over his own tea, the steam wafting up into his face.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Her father nods, grim. "You too?"

"Yeah."

She moves about the kitchen in silence, grabbing her favorite mug from the cabinet and tearing the troublesome teabag wrapper with her teeth.

"Are you alright, Arya?"

She looks up to him and raises a brow. "Are you?"

"Yes," he answers. "Well, no. But I didn't see Jon get hit by a car."

"Oh." Arya's gaze drifts down. She stares at her mug and tries not to picture it.

"Arya, why were you at Jon's?"

She is frozen at his words. She searches for an excuse. Why was she at Jon's? Why? "Umm…"

"You know you can tell me anything."

Arya looks up at his words. She is caught under his knowing look. "You've been out a lot lately, and very vague about where you're going. When I saw you with him tonight, the way he …" he drifts off. "I just wish you would have told me."

Arya swallows. "It wasn't you. Not really. It was Jon we didn't really want to know." She bites her lip. "But I wasn't sure how you or mum would react…"

He nods and says, "He's a bit old for you."

The words are instinctive at this point. "We're only three years apart." She looks away. "It doesn't matter now, anyway. It's… over. Tonight we broke up."

His brows furrow. "At the hospital? Why?"

"We…" Her vision grows blurry. "Jon got hit by a car. Because of us. Because Jon caught us."

"What do you mean?"

"Jon saw us together. He freaked out. He tried to hit Gendry and he moved out of the way… They didn't see the car." Arya doesn't remember starting to cry. "It's because of us."

His hand moves over hers. "Arya, look at me." She does. "You did not cause some drunk to run over your brother."

"But we—"

"It's not your fault. It's not because of you or Gendry. It's because someone didn't see Jon in the road. If it's anyone's fault, it's theirs."

"Then why do I feel so guilty? Why do—"

Her father stands to hold his crying mess of a daughter. When she finally calms down, he makes her a new cup of tea, because the original is cold.

Arya stops him when he is about to go back up to bed. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I was afraid you would compare them, think that he…" She bites her lip and admits, "Robert Baratheon is—"

"Gendry's father," he finishes for her. A nostalgic smile spreads across his face. "I know. I remember getting the call, the day he was born. I've never heard Robert so happy—"

"You knew?" Arya is aghast. "And you let him fucking leave him? Leave his wife, leave his child—"

"I can't control what Robert does. No one can. I learned that a long time ago." Arya grits her teeth. "And as far as I can tell, the only thing Gendry shares with his father are his looks."

She softens. Arya finds herself wishing Gendry were there to hear that.

It's been three days. Jon hasn't woken up. Arya practically lives at the hospital. She would sleep there if her parents would allow it.

Perhaps she would sleep better if she was there. Arya spends most of the night tossing and turning, thinking about Jon, thinking about Gendry. She has had exactly seven hours of sleep over the course of three days. She counted.

Arya peers at her reflection in the mirror. She wants to cringe at the dark circles beneath her eyes. She wishes that the tired, blank expression she wears would fade. Her body is exhausted and sluggish. She thinks at any moment, it will simply just give out on her.

She walks around the house like a zombie, and her family is deeply concerned. Everyone leaves her alone. Except for her father, who tells her that maybe she should go talk to him.

Even if she wanted to talk to Gendry, she isn't sure he would want to. She thinks of his fist slamming in to the vending machine, the fury in his eyes. She hurt him. He must hate her.

Sometimes, she thinks that she made a mistake. Arya will admit that the accident was perhaps not directly their fault. She still feels guilty. But maybe… maybe she could get over it.

A knock at the door pulls her away from her thoughts. It is her mother. She offers Arya an unsure smile as she enters her bedroom. "Mum? What's up? Is Jon—"

"Jon's fine." Arya breathes a sigh of relief. Her mother continues, "I just… we're all worried about you."

"I'm fine, mum. You don't need to worry about me."

"You're not, Arya." Her next words are hesitant, "Your father… he told me about Gendry."

"Oh." Arya figured this would happen.

"I'm sorry, dear." She approaches, putting a hand on her shoulder. "I know it's difficult, especially everything going on with Jon… but perhaps this is for the best."

"None of this is for the best," Arya says before she can bite her tongue. "Gendry is…." She shakes her head and sighs, "Why do you think that anyway? I thought you would want me to have a boyfriend. You're always wanting me to be more like Sansa."

"That's not true, Arya." Her hand falls from her shoulder in offense. "I love you just the way you are. Sometime, yes, I wish we had a little more in common, like Sansa and I do. But I understand that you and your sister are different people, and that's okay." She brushes back her daughter's hair, "I just think you're too young for something so serious. So is Sansa."

"I wasn't going to move in with him or anything, mum." She stops herself from rolling her eyes. "And Sansa… Sansa's happy. She seems to really love him." Arya thinks back to the hospital, to Sandor comforting her sister. His pain-stricken face, the sympathy in his eyes… it was the first time she's seen the big brute show any emotion. "And he seems to really love her too."

Her mother sighs, "I just wish she would have gone to university first."

She is at the hospital. Again. And this time Sansa has joined her.

They are at Jon's bedside. His heart monitor beeps steadily. It's comforting. Together, they sit in the loveseat beside the window.

The room is nice. Her father paid for a private room. It's spacious, with a lot of windows and light. The windows are a request of her mother's. She says it makes everything less "gloomy". Arya is glad it makes her mother feel better, but it doesn't make her feel any better.

"Arya?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't want to pry, or for you to get mad … but Arya, you look awful."

The corner of her mouth quirks up, "More awful than usual?"

"That is not what I meant." Her sister's lips are pursed. "When was the last time you slept?"

"Last night." This is not a lie. She slept for two hours. "Sansa, really. I'm okay."

Her sister doesn't push it any further. They fall back into silence.

"Sansa?"

"Yes?"

"I just…" Arya sighs. "I'm sorry, okay? About Sandor. I understand now, he makes you happy. And you should be able to be with whoever makes you happy."

This touches her sister. Her eyes glisten with unshed tears. "Thank you, Arya."

For once, Arya is the first to move in for the sisterly embrace.

It is a Friday night when Jon wakes up. At exactly seven minutes past midnight, she gets the call.

The whole family rushes to the hospital. Everyone is crying and wants a hug from the disoriented Jon.

"I'm so sorry," Arya whispers to him.

"It wasn't your fault, little sister. I shouldn't have attacked him, I'm sorry."

School starts back up the following Monday. Arya sits at her lunch table, silently picking at her macaroni and cheese with a flimsy plastic fork.

Her classmates are in deep discussion, something about Hot Pie's bread that she tunes out. Jon is awake, but stuck in the hospital. She hasn't seen Gendry in over a week. Arya wonders if he's even gone to the hospital to visit his roommate. She feels like she would have seen him, if he had.

She wants to see him. To talk to him. To say that she is sorry that she hurt him. To say that he means more to her than she could possibly explain. To say…

"Arya," Edric Dayne interrupts her thoughts. "Arya."

She snaps, "What?"

"Easy," He puts his hands up in surrender with a chuckle. "Just wanted to ask if you were alright. You were spacing out."

"Yeah," Hot Pie says. "Were you listening to anything I was saying?

"Oh," she starts. "I'm so fucking sorry that I'm too busy thinking about how my brother is in fucking hospital, to pretend that I'm intrigued by your croissant and honey-wheat crossbreed, which sounds fucking disgusting by the way! You don't know half of what I'm going through, so please just leave me the fuck alone!"

She shut them up. Until Hot Pie finally breaks the silence. "Are you on your period or something?"

"Fucking hell."

School is over. Arya goes straight to the hospital. Jon smiles when she enters.

Gesturing to where it lay on the sofa, "You left your jacket last night."

"I was wondering where that went," she says as she retrieves it. "Been freezing my ass off all day."

He gives her a half-hearted chuckle. She joins him on the bed, and they fall into silence as they stare blankly at the TV.

Things are slightly awkward between them. Her brother knows she and Gendry are finished, and he knows that he is the reason. She is almost always lost in her thoughts, moping, and sleep deprived.

Eventually, Jon mutters under his breath, "You're even worse than him."

She catches it. Her heart stops. Jon has seen Gendry. She is worse than him.

"Fucking say something, Arya," Jon pleads. "Stop being quiet, stop being tired, stop…" He drifts off. His voice is small when he speaks again, "Stop being sad."

Arya is taken aback. She looks into Jon's softened eyes. They are ashamed, guilty. They plead with her.

"I'm so sorry, little sister." His face is pained. "You were happy. You were both happy. And I… I'm sorry. I was wrong. I was trying to protect you, but I… I only hurt you."

She doesn't know what to say. Jon had been the reason. He was her validation. He was her reassurance. He was the only thing that justified the breakup. She took solace in that, and now it is gone.

I fucked everything up.

The realization hits her hard. What did I do? What did I do? He loved me, he loved me, and I ruined it. I ruined everything—

"Arya, are you okay?"

She still doesn't know what to say. Words refuse to come to her. Luckily, she is saved by another's entrance. Ygritte, her brother's mystery redhead, comes through the door.

Arya has met her a few times now. From what she gathers, their relationship can be a bit rocky. She's caught them bickering a couple times. They apparently had a fight the night of Jon's accident, which explained her brother's early return.

But the both of them seem to care greatly for one another. Arya remembers Ygritte's sad, reddened eyes the night she came to the hospital. She hadn't heard about the accident until after Jon had woken up.

Arya remembered how her brother had smiled when he first saw her.

Ygritte recognizes the tense atmosphere upon entering the room. "Everything okay?" She glances to Jon and then to Arya. "I could come back later…"

"No." Arya finally finds her words. "It's fine. I've got to head out anyways." She rushes to leave. "It was nice to see you again," she tells Ygritte before flying out the door.

"Arya, wait—" Jon tries. She ignores him.

She wants Gendry back, she does. She knows that now. Jon made her realize that. But he won't take her back, will he? She fucked it up and now he is angry with her. She knows that she hurt him.

She drives aimlessly around town for about an hour.

Until her subconscious takes her to the pub. Their pub. The Peach.

Arya thinks that she could use a drink.