Chapter 10 (!)
When they reached their door, Ian breathed in relief but also felt his heart begin to beat faster. She was going to question him, any minute now.
As soon as he closed the door after them, she turned to him. Her beautiful green eyes were insecure, sensitive, she looked lost and unsure. All he wanted to do was erase that. All he wanted to do was make her smile again, see the warmth in her eyes. But he knew this was it.
"You have feelings for me." She stated and bit her lip, not meeting his eyes.
"You have feelings for me too." He said, his eyes fixed on her. It didn't matter that she couldn't even look at him, all he could do was stare at her.
She took a deep breath, still not meeting his eyes. "Ian... Why have you been such a jerk to me all this time?"
His eyes softened. "Because you've been with Jake."
She shook her head and took a few steps closer to him. "That's what you said last night."
This time, her eyes reached his, demanding.
His breath was stuck in his throat. "I didn't want to get any closer to you while you were with someone else."
Her eyes started to tear up, but still were looking at him in shock. She obviously didn't understand. "Ian..." She took a deep breath again and wiped her eyes. "You've been a jerk to me for years."
He sighed, there was no escape. "Have a seat, love."
She sat on the bed, and he sat in front of her on the bed, looking gently into her eyes. "When Natalie was in the hospital after the accident with the Vespers, you were always near. You didn't leave my side, you always kept coming to the hospital, wanting to know if she would make it. She was so close to death, and I... I cherished every moment of you being there. You made me stronger, you made me realize I didn't have to be alone." He said gently.
He paused for a minute, and then continued. "...Cara was there too. Back then, I didn't think of anybody as my girlfriend, I just knew she was the one. All I could think about was Natalie. And when Natalie finally got better... I started to notice the world again. For me, the situation was very clear. There was no one who has been through what I've been through like Cara. No one. She knew exactly how I felt, and she was there, and she was lonely too. She had to be the one. But... I started to feel... jealous, every time I saw you with him. He came so often with you to the hospital, and when I started noticing... I couldn't help but hate it. Without knowing it, I decided to stay away. I lost my chance with you, and obviously anyway you weren't for me. I used to think you'd never get me like she does. You'd never understand everything I've been through like she does.
So I stayed away, and two years passed... and then one day, after a Cahill meeting which Jake and Cara attended with us, Cara and I came back home in silence, and she removed her jacket and put it on a chair. Then, she turned to me and said - 'You still want her, don't you?'."
Ian took a deep breath, meeting her shocked eyes. "I told her I had no idea who she was talking about, and she told me to stop playing games with her and with myself. She wasn't even angry or furious about that, just factual. She said she tried to figure out why it wasn't working well between us, why we were fading away all the time, and that she finally understood. She said she couldn't be with me when I'm obviously still in love with... you."
They were both quiet for a moment, but then Ian decided to keep talking. "I didn't think she was right, at first. and even if she was - So what? You were taken. I was in denial, I didn't want to even think of the possibility of still having feelings for you. What would come out of that? Nothing. You guys were obviously going to marry. I saw the way he looked at you. He knew he couldn't make any mistakes, or else there would be someone else in the picture for you."
Amy exhaled, shaking her head. "All... all this time?"
Ian breathed out. "yes."
"And you never..." She rose her eyes to his. "You never said anything."
"What could I say? You guys were it."
"Well, not," She looked upset for some reason. "We broke up."
They were both quiet again.
"I didn't see it coming," He said eventually. "And the years passed, and all I wanted was to move on. It was just a stupid crush on a stupid girl, for god's sake. So.. I tried to keep my distance. And that's your answer."
Amy closed her eyes. "Ian, I... I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything."
She took a deep breath, and Ian took the opportunity to gaze at her. Her ginger hair was wet, wetting her blue sundress. Her pale cheeks were bright red and her eyelashes black and long. She was beautiful.
He knew he would have to tell her the truth eventually.
She opened her eyes again. "I feel like an idiot for not knowing."
He rolled his eyes, flexing his arms' muscles in the process. "I'm a Lucian, you could never know without me letting it show."
It made her smile, he managed to lighten the mood so easily. He got serious again suddenly, and then looked into her eyes. "Amy, I'm sorry."
Just looking at him right now felt like a dream. So many girls would kill to just take her place right now. He was gorgeous. He didn't put on his shirt, and his muscles kept showing. His eyes were intent and serious.
She nodded, trying to stay focused while staring at those eyes. "I accept your apology. I understand why you did what you did, though I never have before."
"I'm sorry about Korea too," He kept going. "I was supposed to kill you, and locking you guys at the cave was the thing I had to settle first with Natalie. Everything was crazy back then. I had to make sure you had a chance to make it out alive, and it was the only option. The other option was getting killed along with you guys."
She started crying. Damn it. "So..."
"And I never left before I saw you getting out of there." He proceeded, his eyes blazing. He got closer to her without knowing, taking her hands and making her look into his eyes. "Listen to me, I never left. It wasn't a game for me, you were never a stepping stone, you were the first fucking thing that mattered in my life."
She sobbed without control and he brought her to his chest, his arms caging her close.
After a few moments, Amy calmed down and pulled away from him gently, blushing. "I'm sorry, I..." Being that close to him was messing with her head. "I guess I've never let that go before."
He smiled at her and took a piece of her hair back. "That's fine, I haven't either."
She giggled and then looked in his eyes again, hesitated. "Ian... What do you want?"
His eyes darkened, and she felt every cell in her body come alive. "You really don't know?"
She felt herself breathing hard. This was not like her at all. "Tell me."
"You."
And that was it. She got closer and kissed him lightly, as if she was only trying it. She pressed her lips to his gently and put her hand on his hard chest, her other hand went to his shoulder.
the heat was too much, he groaned under her lips. One of his hands went to her waist, keeping her tight to himself, and the other went to her hand, taking it in his and holding it up.
By instinct, he turned her and pushed her against the soft mattress, his hand keeping hers above on the pillow and his lips and body pressed to hers.
Her soft pant was swallowed by his mouth, and if she could she would squeal in happiness because ever since their kiss earlier, all she wanted to do was kiss him again.
It was like magic, like a spell. She could get addicted to it easily, just the feel of his lips, his groans, his body. Believing that a guy that looked like him could be interested in her was near ridiculous.
Of course, in her brain, she knew she looked good. But for some reason, the nerdy part of her had a better control on her confidence, and she never really felt attractive.
...But she felt like Ian was looking more into who she was, rather than how she looked like anyway.
His tongue was licking at her lips and then diving into her mouth, and she moaned. She felt completely different, when was the last time she had it with anybody? Like this?
His mouth left hers and stared trailing soft kisses down her neck. It was amazing how he wasn't too aggressive, he kept holding himself so he wouldn't be too heavy on her, but all she wanted was to press herself harder against him.
Suddenly he stopped and brought his head back to hers, his forehead touching hers. They were both breathing hard. "You look so beautiful right now it actually hurts."
She blushed and stared into his eyes boldly. "So... so what now?"
He panted one last time and then rolled aside and laid next to her. "I think... one of us should go take a shower now."
"Oh," She rose up, feeling confused for some reason. "Okay, so -"
"Amy."
She turned to look at him, his eyes were closed tight. "What?"
"This..." He rose up and looked at her. "What happened right now, cannot happen again if you want to be only friends with me."
She nodded and bit her lip. "Yes, I get that." She sighed and got up. Her blue dress was sticking to her body and her wet hair was sticking to it. Ian wanted to scream at her for making him see this.
"Is that means..." She turned to him, concern in her green eyes. "That you want more?"
His eyes blazed when he got up and walked to her, stopping a few steps away. "I want a fair chance. Back then, when we were kids, it wasn't fair to any of us. I need to have my chance with you properly."
She nodded. "I think... we can try." She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry for what you've been through, I had no idea. I always thought you just didn't like me."
He chuckled. "Who couldn't like you?"
She blushed and averted her eyes. "I guess many people, I don't know."
He rolled his eyes. "That's plain stupid, love."
She laughed softly, great full she was going to shower. She needed the opportunity to digest all of this, all of him. She was surprised at her reaction to him, she was way too calm then she would've thought. "I'm going to shower now."
He nodded, his eyes soft. "Ok, Love."
Amy closed the bathroom door behind her. The second he heard the water running, he picked up his phone and called Sinead.
Ok, so... This is chapter 10! Yayy !
Hope you liked it !