Helloo my lovelies ^-^ here's the next chapter! I kinda hate it, because I just can't seem to get it right… grr. But here. Just angsty Clace in this chapter, but no worries! Sizzy and Malec in the next lot. Mwhahaa. Anyway, thanks for getting this to 100 reviews! Eeep! More much loved! x
Clary could tell something was amiss the moment they returned to Alicante. Jace could sense it too. Like the city was on edge.
What had they missed?
Clary wasn't feeling sick when they returned, so she put off her visit to the Clave doctor. It couldn't be something bad, otherwise Tessa would have told her what was wrong. Clary had made the girl promise before she left to tell her in a letter what happened concerning Jem, her and Will.
"Home." Clary smiled as they walked through the door, the cases following them right after. With a smile of his own, Jace pressed a kiss to her cheek and sighed out "I want to see Alec, but he is apparently in New York." A frown creased his forehead and Clary stole a kiss from his lips, telling him softly. "I'm sure you will find out soon enough."
"I certainly hope so. I bet he has hooked up with someone. Finally."
A pause and Clary realized something, blinking a little and taking a step back- where was Simon? Jace had been good on his word and sent a letter to his father to take in the boy, but he wasn't here. At least, she thought so.
"Do you think Simon is still at the Lightwoods?" Clary asked her husband in surprise. He looked thoughtful, then nodded "Father in his letter back told me he was staying there a little longer than he planned. Isabelle Lightwood requested his presence."
"Isabelle Lightwood?"
With a nod, Jace stepped behind Clary and caught hold of her waist, pressing his lips to her cheek as he replied "I would say he has become Izzy's sex slave, but after what happened to her, and Simon's looks… simply not possible."
"Tsk. Simon, servant or not, is my friend. You cannot talk about him like that Jace."
Jace chuckled, kissing persuasively at a spot under her ear, whispering out "Enough talk of the servant, I have a mind to carry you up to the bedroom right now."
"Now now Romeo, later. I wish to see my mother first. I've missed her terribly."
With a light pout, Jace took a step back and nodded. "See you later then my love. Are you taking the carriage or my horse?"
"Your horse I think. The carriages… I have grown sick of them. My backside goes so numb."
Jace stole a kiss from her lips and just watched her go in silence.
-OfSeraphBladesAndBallGowns-
When Clary arrived at the Morgenstern mansion, she gazed up at the place with a light sigh- her other home. Her old home.
As soon as she stepped inside the door, a maid was upon her, going "Oh-! Mrs. Herondale! We- your father was not expecting you."
It seemed odd to Clary that it was just 'your father' not 'your parents.'
"Where is my mother?"
The maid blinked and opened her mouth to speak, but no words sounded as footsteps upon the stairs reached their ears. "Clarissa?"
It was her father.
He shooed the maid away instantly and stood before his daughter, a light frown upon his face. "You never sent ahead that you were coming to visit" he noted, almost accusingly and Clary just asked "Where is Mother? I have so much to tell her."
There was a pause and Valentine sighed, telling her quietly. "Come with me Clarissa." Mystified, Clary followed him through the mansion until they arrived at the master bedroom. As they walked inside, she froze- her mother was fast asleep.
"Your mother was in an accident." Valentine told her softly and Clary didn't understand- she was asleep, wasn't she? What was going on?
"What happened?"
"She was stabbed. In the abdominal area."
Clary gasped in utter horror, spluttering out with "I- what-? Is she-?"
"A coma. But the child perished. A well placed blow… if I hadn't found her when I did, I am sure she would have as well."
There were tears burning in Clary's eyes now. She stepped forwards until she was at her mothers side, reaching down and taking her hand into her own, muttering out "Who did it?"
"I'm going to find him, Clarissa. He has crossed the line and must be bought down."
Clary glanced around to her father- his dark eyes held a terrible anger. His fists were clenched at his side. "Who did it Father?"
"That is none of your business, Clary."
"She is my mother!"
"I have matters to attend to. Good day." He was gone.
Clary just stood there in utter shock, grief and horror searing her veins- what had happened while she was away playing happy wife?
She stayed there for hours by her mothers' side until she started to feel ill once more. Then she decided it was time to get herself checked over once and for all.
The sadness and grief was just making her think things. Things she never had thought about before.
Concerning her and Jace.
-OfSeraphBladesAndBallGowns-
The Clave doctor, a small woman with light brown hair and matching eyes was unfamiliar to Clary. She'd never been to see the doctor before, always having home visits whenever she fell ill from a male.
Clary answered all the questions swiftly, had her temperature taken, pulse taken as well as a few other tests. She was found to be physically healthy.
"It is usually here-" she told the doctor, rubbing her abdomen lightly. The doctor paused at that, her eyes flickering down as she asked "Mrs. Herondale, could you please lie down for me? Over there?"
Obedient, Clary walked over to the narrow white bed and lay down upon it, closing her eyes as the woman started to trace her stomach with her thumbs, pressing lightly in some spots, harder in the others.
"When did you last bleed?"
"I cannot remember. But I am very late."
"You can get up" she was told with a smile and Clary paused, but then did so, sitting there feeling utterly nervous- what was wrong with her?
"Am I dying?" she blurted out and the doctor blinked, but then let out a laugh, smiling as she shook her head. "No Mrs. Herondale. I think you will find that you are expecting."
Clary just froze at that- had she heard correctly? Was that… possible?
And then it truly hit her and she gasped, eyes flying open, hands upon her stomach as she rose to her feet, saying slowly. "I am pregnant?"
"I suspect so. You have been experiencing 'morning sickness.'"
"Oh by the Angel. Oh my…" she was panting from fear now, raising a hand and covering her eyes. Hands took her shoulders and the soft, comforting voice told her "Calm down my dear. Deep breaths. In. Out."
"I don't want to be pregnant." Clary just whined, shaking her head insistently. "I am only sixteen! I am married to a man I barely know, but love and… this is too fast! I just cannot do this anymore!" she just fled.
-OfSeraphBladesAndBallGowns-
Jace was sat at his piano, scribbling at a new piece he was attempting to compose, occasionally pressing a key to see if it was the one he needed.
The moment he heard running footsteps, his head snapped up and he rose to his feet- the steps were light. Clary.
He strode across the room and poked his head out, seeing the girl sat in the living room on the floor before the fireplace. She was crying. Something was terribly wrong.
"Clary-?" he asked in concern as he walked over to her, falling to his knees beside her weeping figure. She just gazed at him and shook her head, muttering out "We have been such fools."
"Clary-"
"I spent the entire time when I was told I was to marry some man just… thinking. Thinking about who he would be. What he would be like. All the evidence pointed to him being so terrible. So when it was you… I was so relieved that I forgot any worries I had. We have been together just a mere month, Jace, and already we are changing."
"What are you babbling on about-?"
"We-" she swallowed hard "Love takes time. Marriage does not create love." Her eyes flickered down, whispering out "I heard of this girl once. Ariana Nightshade. She married her husband and they fell in love so quickly. Within mere days. She fell pregnant so soon and it all seemed so very happy in the family." Her eyes widened. "And when the baby arrived, it destroyed them. Ariana realized she cared for the man, but her feelings were not ones of love. It was like a flash fire; she loved intensely for a year, and then it was all over. The man she once loved was just…" she couldn't go on and Jace just stared before asking quietly "What are you saying?"
"I'm scared this is happening to us. I keep thinking myself Clarissa Morgenstern still."
"You are Clary Herondale. My wife. What has made you think of all this? Yes we rushed into love, a gamble… but it was worth it. At least, I think so. "
"What did you think of me when you first saw me? Tell me the truth."
"I thought you were some little Morgenstern bitch. Like your father." He admitted. "I didn't think too much to you, but never showed it."
Clary sighed and rested her forehead against the young man's chest, closing her eyes and let him stroke her hair back gently, muttering out "We should have had time to fall in love. For you to court me properly. More days like that hill."
"Do you love me?" Jace asked in a strange voice and Clary glanced up, meeting golden eyes that looked a tad angry- he was thinking the whole situation was leading to Clary telling him that their marriage hadn't been a smart match. That they had never… she never loved him.
Of course she did. Yes the time had been short but she did love him. Just… a baby? And they were barely set up?
"Yes I love you" Clary whispered out, burying her face in his neck. "I love you Jace. I'm just confused." She contemplated telling him about her mother, that her father was hiding something, but didn't bother. This was hers to worry about. Not his.
"Confused about what? You're confusing me now."
"Confusing you?"
"Yes. Confusing. You're confusing me with your confusing…ness." He told her in amusement and Clary scowled, sitting back. "Do you think this is funny? Are you taking this serious at all?"
Jace rolled his eyes and nodded. "I am Clary. I just don't see what you're worried about. We are married. End of story. Look at the future, not the past. Come on- let's get you something to eat. Then we train."
Clary let the words sink in, whispering out "Jace I am being serious. About everything."
"So am I. Skip the training or straight to bed? I personally fancy the latter and-" he was cut off as Clary slapped him across the face. He gazed at her incredulously, asking in an annoyed voice "Fine. Guess you're not sexually frustrated like I am. That's good to know."
"Just shut up Jace. For one moment, shut up." She told him, clenching her eyes closed. There were so many thoughts going through her head. Next to all of them confusing. Some wanted her to run out and just go home, but no. She was going to stay.
Jace rose to his feet and snorted lightly, narrowing his eyes. "Clary. This is our lives. Whatever we want to make it, we will. Fuck the others and whatever's made you feel like this."
"I'm pregnant Jace."
He hadn't been expecting that. Nothing near. Jace's eyes widened in utter horror and shock. After a moments silence, Clary was wondering if he could still speak. He let out a long, low breath and just turned to leave, but Clary scowled and grabbed his arm. He flinched and she let go instantly, hearing quietly "Now I understand. Why you have been thinking these things."
With a hard swallow, Clary whispered out "I'm starting to feel lost, Jace. Like, I don't know what to do anymore. We lived in our personal dream world and now reality has come back to claim us."
Jace was staring at Clary's stomach, thinking through the haze She's carrying your child Jonathan. Your little girl or boy. Say something.
"Are you sure you are… you know?" he asked in a barely audible voice, wondering why he was filled with more dread than anything pleasant. He should have been ecstatic, but he wasn't. He just felt miserable and strangely alone.
"Yes. Positive." Clary told him quietly and Jace groaned, closing his eyes and shaking his head a little. Not yet. Yes, a child he wanted, but no. Not this soon. It was too early. Too early in the marriage.
He suddenly understood why Clary had wondered about them. That their marriage would crumble like dirt under their feet as time went by. Now he was starting to wonder.
Everything in Alicante was starting to fall. It was like a darkness was striking the hearts of its inhabitants, slowly killing them. Chaos would break out soon, he was sure.
Jace just swallowed hard and took Clary's face into his hands, telling her quietly "We will be fine, Clary. I promise you. Us two against the world if we have to."
With a weak smile, Clary replied "Well who else is going to put up with you?"
"I'm rather sure I could fine someone. You know… a whore house. I think they would just about manage one night with me."
Clary laughed weakly and let him press a kiss to her forehead, feeling warm as he hugged her into his chest. Yes, they were a messed up pair in a messed up marriage. But all Clary could think was thank the Angel we're in this together.
Jace was in a good mood. He'd never felt so cheerful since the day he decided he properly loved Clary. That had actually been maybe a week ago. He'd spent the first part of the relationship wondering… but realized this was a girl, a person he didn't have to be snappy around, insulting them in every breath. Like William.
Because for one thing, if he was rude to Clary, she would be rude right back. It was a quality in her that both amused and intrigued him.
The bell rang, signaling someone was at the door and Jace rolled his eyes, telling Clary "The servants are the slowest thing in this City. I should put them in a pit with demons… that would teach them how to run. Wait here." He let her go and Clary watched him walk to the front door and yank it open. She couldn't see who it was, but when Jace stumbled backwards almost ten minuets later, his eyes wide in shock, she walked over too with her expression curious. What could shock unshockable Jace? He just told the man to leave right now.
There was a representative from the Clave there and as soon as Clary drew near, he inclined his head and made his retreat. His expression was grave.
As soon as the door was closed, Clary saw that his hand was clenched shut around something. He raised his slightly shaking hand and let it open- she spied a Herondale ring. One spotted with blood. It wasn't Jace's, for his was still upon his finger.
Why hadn't he spoken?
"Mother and Father were on their way back from London" Jace muttered out, eyes blank and staring at a spot upon the wall, not really seeing it. "They went past Lake Lyn. A wheel of the carriage broke, sending them into the lake." A shiver seemed to shoot through his body. "The coach driver, he said… the lake water-" he just stopped dead with his breath catching in his throat. Clary was feeling cold. She didn't want to hear what was coming next.
"The lake water caught them just as they reached the North Gate. Father was under the impression that werewolves were trying to tear him apart and he fell. His head hit-" he swallowed hard. Clary didn't have to guess what had happened. Oh by the Angel… no. Not now.
"And then Mother, she-" Jace continued, raising a hand to his wrist and making what seemed was a cutting motion and Clary just stood there, not having any idea what to do. The sorrow entering her heart was becoming to painful to bear. Tears started sparkling in her eyes.
"They are gone, Clary." He just whispered and Clary could tell he was attempting to hold it together. Seem his usual tough-skinned, Shadowhunter self. But he failed utterly and completely as a dry sob escaped him. Clary shut the front door and just drew the young man into her arms, letting him bury his face into her neck, hands holding her sides so very tight, but she didn't have the heart to push him off. He was sobbing, but his eyes were barely wet. Clary guessed it was just the shock. She was shocked too. Of all things to happen, that had been the last thing on her mind.
Her heart went out to Stephen and his wife. And then their son in her arms.
Clary gazed over the top of the boys head at the mansion behind them, feeling miserable.
"I'm here sweetheart." Clary just muttered, tears sparkling in her own eyes, smoothing the young mans' honey-blonde hair back.
Everything was falling apart.
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