Author's Notes:

Firstly, as always, I would like thank all those who favorite, followed or reviewed my story. Your support is really appreciated and pushes me to try harder.

Secondly, like some of you asked for, here is the next chapter from PMH. Hope you like Argo's newest shenanigans.

Lastly: I do not own either "HighSchool DxD" or "SwordArtOnline"

PMH (Psycho Mother Hen) III

"Your family really likes using golem sentries, don't they?" Hikari idly asked; a playful smile on her face as she dodged the massive stone sword that was trying to crush her.

"This is so not the time Hikari." Tsukino Dantalion, also known as Argo 'The Rat', answered between clenched teeth, the metallic claw gauntlet mounted on her right arm cleaving deep gouges upon the enchanted stone of a second golem, cutting out it's leg and allowing her to strike at its head.

Taking stock of the situation at hand Argo couldn't help but let out a groan of frustration. Thanks to the information they had acquired at the central vault she had managed to bypass the alarms and locks placed upon the emergency escape tunnel deep within the compound.

It should have been a direct route outside the area of influence of the siege wards and other assorted defenses dreamed up by generations of Dantalions. And from there an easy trip to the human world and hopefully to acquiring her new Peerage.

An easy task, no problem, especially considering they had acquired all the passwords, codes, locations and intelligence regarding the compound defenses.

'Of course I should have remembered that Dantalion and Paranoid are practically synonyms in some parts of the Underworld.' She bitterly thought, blasting the stone behemoth that was trying to flatten her with her demonic power.

Because of course the escape route would have a secret, completely separate, secondary set of defenses, completely autonomous to the ones depicted upon the central archive and for which she had no passwords or access codes.

'Always have a plan, and never trust it.' She acutely remembered the ancient saying her family favored, jumping back to avoid the massive stone spear being swung against her while watching Hikari blasting two other golems with a jet of blue flames.

"You know, for a last line of defense created by your family I was kind of expecting more than simply a cage filled with stone guardians and deathly traps, after all, once you disable the taps the golems by themselves aren't really that dangerous." She flippantly said, joining Argo in the center of the arena.

For 'Arena' was the only word that could accurately describe the area they were in, a large circular room that had been filled with stone sentries, hidden traps scattered everywhere and with two doorways at opposite sides of the room, both now blocked by barriers thrumming with demonic energy and keeping them in.

"Hikari please take this seriously, we barely managed to stop the alarm spell from activating while dismantling those traps, there is no telling what else is here and I would rather not tempt fate." Argo said while taking out one of the remaining golems while Hikari blasted the other.

"I'm just saying that I expected more, I mean, isn't one of your grandparents supposedly famous for his enchanting skills, more specifically, his nigh indestructible golems?" She simply asked, her unimpressed gaze taking in the piles of rock littering the room.

As if in answer to her question the loud sound of a gong reverberated through the area, a faint blue glow suddenly coursing through the floor and penetrating the scattered remains of the stone sentries they had taken out.

Before their surprised eyes they watched as the stones started rising from the ground and rushing towards one another, grouping together into far too familiar forms, cracks disappearing before their eyes in mere seconds until nothing but the pristine form of over thirty, seven feet tall, enchanted stone golems remained, large stone weapons at the ready and facing the duo.

"Okay, I take that back. This is pretty impressive." Hikari happily declared all but ignoring her old friend irritated look and twitching eyebrow.

"This kind of defense mechanism doesn't even make sense!" Argo shouted in frustration at the new obstacle they were facing.

After managing to take down the barrier locking them inside the arena with the regenerating golems; then passing through a corridor filled with moving saws, spikes and other assorted pointy and bladed objects that proved themselves completely immune to magic; and facing down and evading a dragon made of enchanted crystal that practically redefined the meaning of the word indestructible, inside what for all intents and purposes appeared to be an active volcano of all things; they were upon the latest obstacle upon their path.

"Do your parents or family in general enjoy video-games, Tsukino-sama?" Hikari asked with a hint of amusement, a small amused smile firm upon her face.

Taking in the revolving floating platforms that were continuously moving around the large square room, the large black abyss that constituted the majority of the room's floor, the jets of flame and other assorted traps that were activating and deactivating in a seemingly random pattern, the enchanted armored knights that were stationed in the central platform and other strategic spots, and the fact they had to reorient half a dozen mirrors in order to reflect a ray of light into a orb resting in said platform in order to open the massive gates that were locking them in, Argo couldn't help but feel that her [Queen's] question had quite a bit of merit.

"Let's get this over with." She said while choosing not to actually answer the question, jumping to the nearest platform and immediately leaping to the next one in order to avoid the surge of electricity that had engulfed her previous position.

Jumping from position to position without pause, dodging an ever increasing assortment of exotic traps, Argo knew without a doubt that this video-game like challenge was her father's fault.

After all, he had been the one to introduce her to gaming.

"Oh you got to be kidding me." She moaned in frustration, placing her face upon her hands as Hikari fought back a giggling fit.

After bypassing another heavily trapped corridor and an underwater maze of all things they were facing what was the last obstacle between them and freedom.

Or at least she sincerely hoped it was the last, considering how far they had traveled she knew they were miles away from the compound at this point.

The room looked like a pristine lake, the water reaching only up to their ankles, the doors, walls and ceiling having disappeared when they entered the room, making it look like they were standing upon an infinite expanse.

At the very center of the room was a small island with a single tree, from the shadow of which two figures were emerging, their dark forms appearing to be made out of shadows and their crimson eyes locked upon the two Devils.

They were perfect shadowy replicas of her and Hikari, down to their attire, expressions and posture.

'This is definitely father's doing…' Argo decided with finality, looking at the eerily familiar sight from one of her favorite games her father had introduced to her years ago.

Dodging the black claws that attempted to strike her and replying in kind, only to watch her doppelganger easily avoid her own strike, she shook of her irritation and focused at the battle at hand.

But even so, as she traded blows with her replica while watching Hikari and her own double easily avoiding each other's strikes, she couldn't help a stray thought from forming.

'This would be way easier if we had a hammer…'

"Finally!" Argo exclaimed in elation as they reached the top of the staircase that lead to the surface. "If I had to face another inane obstacle, indestructible guardian, or annoying puzzle I was going to scream!"

"It wasn't that bad." Hikari calmly replied, smiling at her old friend exaggerated reaction. "You can't say that wasn't a unique experience."

"The last room made us run for over two miles while being pursued by a gigantic magic resistant boulder." Argo deadpanned.

"You have no respect for the classics, Tsukino-sama." Was the [Queen's] flippantly reply, her amused smile firmly into place.

Argo opened her mouth to reply only to close it, let out a small sigh and allowed a matching smile to form in her own face.

"Yeah, at the very least it was an interesting ordeal."She declared, trading a bemused look with Hikari. "Now let's go before something else happe…"

She cut herself short upon noticing that there were two small backpacks resting upon the door leading outside, a small white envelope laying atop them.

Throwing caution to the wind she strode forward and opened the letter, Hikari accompanying her and reading it alongside her.

"Greetings Tsukino-chan, I hope you enjoyed your little adventure so far.

Your dear mother will be inspecting our outposts for the following two days alongside yours truly, so you have that long to go to the Human World and get back before she finds out and goes after you. I strongly suggest you to do so.

I took the liberty of packing a few essentials for you and Hikari-chan, just in case. Best of luck in recruiting your new Peerage members!

Love, Dad.

Ps: This message will self-destruct after being read. If your mother gets you I knew nothing about this."

Fighting down the growing eye twitch that was appearing on her face Argo watched as the letter burned to ashes, destroying any incriminating evidence linking her father to her 'unauthorized' excursion to the human world.

Ignoring the faint giggles coming from behind her Argo moved forward and opened one of the backpacks, checking its contents. There was no reason to deny freely given help after all.

Author's Notes:

While working on the obstacles within the secret escape route I noticed that I was all but creating a game dungeon, and upon that realization decided to go for it and actually create a game dungeon, drawing heavily from great games famous for such, like the Legend of Zelda series. Hopefully it turned up alright.

And poor Argo learned that old age and trickery shall always beat youth and exuberance.

Hope you enjoyed the chapter, please review before leaving.