I still own nothing.

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Chapter 10

Maura woke me up the next morning like she did the day before only this time she wasn't mad at me. I loved it when she woke me up.

"I didn't find any bottles in the trash can, so what did you do when you got out of bed last night?"

I did get out of bed last night, but only to puke up the dinner my mother made the day before.

"I had to go puke Maura. Do you really not trust me enough not to drink while you're asleep Maura?"

"You took that trust away the other night Jane."

"I get it Maura, and I can say sorry again."

"Sorry doesn't make it better Jane."

"You've mentioned that a few times."

I got out of bed and took a shower. The hot water felt good on my aching muscles. When I was finished I got out and got dressed, I was ready to face another day without my fix.

When I walked into the living room Maura and my mother were sitting on the couch.

"Are you coming over every day now Ma?" I surprised them both.

My mother turned around, and smiled when she saw me. "You're looking better today, how are you feeling sweetie."

"Much better Ma."

I sat down next to her. I get really irritated at my mother, but to be honest I couldn't ask for a better mother.

Maura got up to take a shower. As soon as she stepped into the bathroom and shut the door my mother was asking questions.

"What's wrong with you two? Maura hasn't acted right since yesterday morning. What did you do?"

"Ma stop, I didn't do anything; even if i did it's none of your business."

"I think it is my business Jane, she's like a daughter to me the same as you. What did you do?" She asked with a little more force behind it.

"Let's just say I acted on those feeling I was talking about the other day."

"You what? You were supposed to come talk to me."

"I know Ma." she was giving me the look now.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry doesn't fix everything Jane." I heard Maura say from behind us.

I turned around.

"I thought you were taking a shower."

"I was, and then I heard you two talking."

"So you were eavesdropping."

"I wouldn't call it that, no I wasn't."

"Maura when you listen in on other people conversation, it's usually called eavesdropping."

"Oh well that's not what I was trying to do. I just thought I could put my input in since you were talking about me, I really wasn't trying to..."

I cut her off. "Maura really its fine, I was just kidding. Go take your shower we will quit talking about you right Ma."

I looked over at my mother. "Of course Maura." my mother said.

Maura walked back down the hall to the bathroom.

"You really do look better."

"I feel somewhat better; I know that if I get through this, I don't plan on drinking again. This is hell in itself."

"You know I should have told you a long time ago that your father was an alcoholic, that's why you hardly ever see him pick up a drink, and if he does he doesn't drink much."

"I think I saw that one coming, I mean took at Tommie. I think he was on the path to becoming an alcoholic."

"I'm sorry Janie I wish I could be the person you could come talk to."

"Ma it's not you, there are just some stuff I don't want to talk to my mother about, and my drinking problems were one of those things. I didn't want to disappoint any one that's why I kept it a secret. I can't say it enough, but I'm sorry Ma."

"No one is disappointed with you Janie we just want to help you."

"Then why do I see disappointment in Maura every time she looks at me. I can't stand it."

"But I'm not disappointed with you Jane." I looked behind me, and there was Maura.

"God woman why do you keep doing that?"

"I wasn't trying to eavesdrop I came to ask if you had some extra towels, and I heard the last of your conversation."

"We really need to get you some cow bells or something; this sneaking up on me thing is not going to work."

"I'm not sneaking Jane, I just walked in."

"We get it Maura."

Maura walked around the couch, and sat in front of me on the coffee table

"I'm not disappointed in you Jane, I wish you would have made different choices yeah, but you did the only thing you could at that time. You just need to realize you have people here that love you and want to help you when something is bothering you, but you Jane, you're just too stubborn in the head to ask for help."