Merlin
Love By any Other name
Part 10
Morgana watched the mysterious woman as she slowly moved forwards, her blonde hair falling to the tops of her shoulders, her face, severe, yet also almost welcoming in its own way.
"I warn you I am the kings Ward and he will execute you for violating my chambers like this!" Morgana said, intending to sound robust and commanding, achieving neither.
"Oh, I know very well who you are Morgana, in fact I probably know more about you then you do yourself" the woman replied. Morgana was going to step back, but there was something in the other woman's face, she was watching Morgana to be sure, but she was also looking for something, a faint glimmer of hope in her eyes.
"I will not warn you again" Morgana threatened.
"I know you won't" she replied, blinking.
"Who are you?" Morgana asked, suddenly fearing the woman. The other woman seemed to sense this, crossing to her quickly.
"Please, trust that I mean you, more than anyone no harm" she said softly. "I am Morgause" she added, her gaze searching again for something in Morgana's face. Slowly her gaze dropped away, for whatever she had been searching for was not currently present.
"You're a scoreress?" Morgana asked slowly. Morgause looked up at her.
"I have some power yes" she replied. "Magic, it is a strong factor in my family, but there are only two of us left now, Myself and my sister" she replied.
"You have my condolences, now state what you want or I will call the guards" Morgana said again. The woman, Morgause turned away briefly.
"As I said, I am a friend" she replied.
"You are no friend of mine" Morgana said. Morgause looked back, her gaze going hard for an instant.
"Oh no, no Morgana, I am the truest friend you have ever had" she replied, then looked away again.
"I must go, for now, but there is much to discuss between us and very little time in which to do so" she said. "I will visit, tomorrow night, and explain what I can, but for now it is dangerous for me to remain" she said. Morgana's mind was awhirl with thought's, of Merlin, Uther and his actions, this strange woman and her cryptic replies.
"You are fatigued, please, just one day and I will explain everything to you" Morgause said looking at her. Morgana blinked and shook her head, closing her eyes to try and quiet the thoughts in her mind. When she opened them again, she saw she was alone. Slowly she went to the bed, sitting down on it, tears filling her eyes, while outside, night had finally fallen.
Gaius sat in the Pharmacy, having long ago finished dealing with the injured knight, he had prepared dinner, but it sat in front of him, uneaten.
The son of a Draonglord is a Dragonlord
The words, Uther's words, echoed around him, taunting him at this time of his greatest failure. That Merlin would now believe that Gaius had 'sold him out' as the term went, meant nothing to him. He deserved the boy's anger. He had lied to him about his father, that was unforgivable, but to tell Uther that he was Balinor's son, that had been his biggest mistake. He had of course, had no choice but to inform Uther, for when Arthur rode out, Merlin, intent on fulfilling his destiny, would have gone with him. And had they met Balinor in battle, the shock would have more than likely led to someone's death. His or Arthur's, or even both of them. So he had done the only thing he could. He had gone to the man who seemed to finally be accepting of Merlin as part of the household. He should. Of course, known, that a hatred and distrust such as Uther's ran deep. But he hadn't realised how wrong he had been. How little Uther had thought of him, even after the argument here only hours ago, assuming, it was just a heated debate caused by the emotion of the moment.
"Oh Merlin, Please forgive me" Gaius muttered.
That the command had come down from Uther had not been entirely surprising, that he had rushed it through to dawn, that was. Now Arthur stood at his chamber windows, watching as the executioners block was slowly being moved into place in the courtyard, hating himself as he watched. Knowing that in but a few hours his innocent friend was about to die. The prat who had helped him see the world from a different perspective, who was always at his side now when battle called, knowing that he could do nothing really to help, but wanting to all the same. Who was soon to die, not because of anything he had done, but because who his father was. Something else he and Merlin could now relate to. After all, how many times had Arthur's life been threatened because of what Uther had set in motion? No, all Merlin had done was try his best, try his best and fall in love. Time and again he had proven his loyalty, even saving Uther in the cave, despite his own injury's, despite Uther's high praise of how he had returned to help him when he was alone facing the sorceress on the isle of the blessed, and despite how his quick thinking had saved Morgana's life. No, despite all that, the boy was to be executed simply because of who his father was. His gaze wondered across the courtyard, where he saw Leon and Thomas both watching the construction of the executioner's block, Leon even yelling at one of the people working on it, his face enraged with anger. Arthur was touched, at their loyalty towards a boy who had been nothing but a simple servant, and he was amazed at how many people Merlin had really got to know.
Gwen was alone in her house, sitting on the bed, wiping tears from her eyes. She had left as Morgana had instructed, and stopped short upon seeing the executioners block being assembled, knowing who it was for. That Uther could be so cold and heartless was of no shock to her, but the fact of it was, she had hoped, prayed that the man would have seen sense, would have grown to realise Merlin was a kind soul, one who had been lost, and had only just found himself, found his happy corner of the world where he could live and love, and in return be loved by Morgana. But no, fate had conspired against them from the start, his falling in love with Morgana, her returning that love, his near death as he had left so he could spare her, Arthur and Uther added pain, his loyalty to the king over and over, saving his son's life just for a start. So Gwen sobbed, not for herself, but for the kind boy who was about to die for nothing. She was still crying when her father entered, and, having heard the news from the gossip mongers in the town, immediately went to her, holding her tightly.
The cell was cold, and unlike the one next to this one, did not even have a proper bed in it, only a makeshift mattress of dried straw. There was a single window, set high in the wall, but it had gone dark about an hour ago. Now of course, the temperature had dropped slightly as well, but then, cells weren't built for comfort. Merlin was alone in his thoughts for the time being. Balinor, his father? And a Dragonlord? It seemed impossible, yet he remembered Gaius's face, the shame he had shown upon admitting this knowledge. But there it was, he had known, and he had chosen to inform Arthur and god help him, Uther of all people, but Merlin, the simpleton, the crippled want to be noble, no, he could never know. So why had Gaius gone to Uther? Perhaps it was because the old man was frightened of Merlin somehow? Especially now this Dragonlord had reappeared, he had to have known what Uther would have done. The sense of betrayal hung around him like a heavy blanket, a heavy, freezing blanket. And now, here he was, huddled in the corner of the cell furthest from the high window, knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around them, shivering slightly.
"Enter" her voice was weak, emotional, not like her at all, so when Arthur walked into the room, he was not surprised to see her crying.
"I hope I'm not disturbing you. I couldn't sleep" he said softly. She looked at him then, and he was shocked at the raw emotion on her face, her lips moved, but no sound came forth. Arthur rushed to her, pulling her into an embrace.
"I can't Arthur, He can't kill him, please, I love him, does that not count for anything?" she sobbed. Arthur holding her tightly. Rocking her gently, even as she sobbed into his tunic.
"Not with Uther" he replied, his own voice breaking just a little, but he vowed he would not break down. He would not let her see him emotional.
He failed.
Merlin was dozing when he heard deep footfalls from outside the cell. Slowly he looked up to see the black boot, and looked up more, Uther's unwavering gaze on him.
"sire" Merlin greeted, with barely contained fury. Uther didn't reply, but looked to his left.
"open the door" he ordered.
"Sire?"
"Open the door, now" he growled. The guard hurried to obey, nearly dropping the keys twice, but finally the door was open.
"Leave us" Uther commanded. The guard hesitated again. "I am not in the habit or repeating myself, you will leave us"
"My lord" the guard bowed and scurried away, slowly Uther turned back to the cell and walked in, Merlin watching him.
"You're to be executed at dawn" Uther told him. Merlin nodded.
"So I noticed" he replied, jerking a thumb at the window. Uther's eyes narrowed.
"And it does not concern you?" he asked, kneeling down.
"Of course it does, but there is more happening then concerns me" Merlin replied.
"At the moment everything about you is of great concern to me" Uther snarled back, kneeling down.
"If I'm to die anyway, what does it matter?" Merlin replied. Uther stood abruptly, turning away.
"You are the most infuriating boy I have ever met!" he snarled.
"No, I'm just a boy who can see past the blame, and wants to do what is right for his family and friends" Merlin retorted. Uther spun around to face him.
"You have no family here, the only family you have is a simple woman and a bastard father" he spat.
"A father I never even knew" Merlin retorted. "all I have done my life is run, or be alone. And the woman I love is here. So you know, I'm happy to die here, because then the running can stop, I can be at peace from you" Merlin's voice was bitter.
"You welcome death so readily?" asked Uther, genuinely puzzled. Merlin wiped away a tear, but met his gaze.
"If that is what it takes to prove myself, then yes, I will die, because I would give my life for this city, for its people, rather than turn in to – against it" he amended.
"What were you going to say?" Uther asked, kneeling down again.
"It's not important" Merlin replied, looking away.
"Then me, rather than turn into me, is that right?" Uther snarled. Merlin remained silent. Uther roughly pushed him away and stood.
"I can see why she likes you" he said after a pause. Merlin looking back up at him. "Many years ago magic cost me the woman I loved, and I vowed then and there I would hunt it down in its many forms and bring an end to its evil" he said.
"I didn't know, I'm sorry" Merlin replied.
"You think I want your pity?" Uther snarled. "I want nothing from you" he added. Merlin shifted to a more comfortable position.
"Then why did you bring it up?" he asked. Uther blinked, and looked at him.
"That, is none of your concern" he said.
"But it is, you don't want me to beg for mercy" Merlin realised. "You want forgiveness" he said.
"I want nothing of the sort!" Uther snarled, grabbing Merlin and Hauling him up. Merlin shook slightly, feeling the wall at his back, Uther's enraged face inches from his own. The king glared at him, and silence held for several moments, before he slowly set him down, Merlin rubbing his throat.
"My wife was barren, she could not bare children" he suddenly said turning away, Merlin watching him.
20 Years Earlier…
"I must have an heir for the Pendragons are to live on" Uther's voice
"I fail to see how I can help, my friend" Nimueh's voice, from so long ago.
"It is, a delicate matter, for Ygraine is barren, she cannot bear me the heir we need"
"You need or you desire?" Nimueh asked, her voice cautious.
"does it matter?" he had replied
"Oh yes my friend, for such a thing is not easily done, and if it does succeed then there will be a price, for someone to live, another must die" she had said. "That is the way of the magic's Uther, the way it has been since the dawn of time"
"then I will gladly pay that price, but we must have an heir, I must have a son" Uther had pleaded. Nimueh had nodded and stepped forwards, taking her friends hand, Uther gripping as he looked at her.
"I will do this for you, but I warn you, I do not know who will pay the price for this, and I only do this because you have been my friend longer than I can remember" she had told him.
"Thank you Nimueh, I will not forget your kindness" he had replied.
Present day…..
Uther went silent, Merlin watching as the king slowly paced around the small cell.
"Nimueh?" he slowly asked. "That… sorceress from the isle of the blessed?"
Uther nodded, but remained silent. Then he took a deep breath.
Nineteen years earlier….
"It is a boy sire" Gaius had said, handing him the small bundle. Ygraine had gone slightly over term, but when she had fallen pregnant the city had rejoiced. Now with tears in his eyes, he looked down.
"Arthur" he had said softly.
"Congratulations my friend" Nimueh had also been present for the birth, and he looked up at her, smiling.
"Uther, my love" Ygraine's voice, soft, gentle, but a hint of pain under it.
"Gaius?" asked Nimueh, looking at him. The physician rushed forwards, checking over Ygraine.
"Gaius?" Uther's voice, concerned.
"I'm not sure sire, the birth went flawlessly, but, something is wrong, something is terribly wrong" he too was concerned. Uther moved to her side, holding her hand, tears of joy, turning to tears of anguish.
"My love…" he whispered.
"Breath… I can't breath" her voice was raspy, her face going pale as her body began to shut down.
"Help her, please!" Uther shouted at Nimueh. The Sorcerer shook her head, tears in her eyes.
"Our son… Uther, let me see him" her voice a plea. Uther held Arthur forwards, Ygraine's smile lighting up the room.
"Remember I will always love you" she had said, then with those last words the light had faded from her eyes.
"A death for a life Uther, I cannot save her as much as I long too" she had replied.
"LIAR, YOU KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN!" his voice, now roaring in anguish. Nimueh stepped back, shocked.
"If I had known she would pay the price I would never have agreed!" Nimueh had retorted. "I have no more power on choosing who lives and who is taken. I warned you Uther, I told you a price would be paid!" she cried, tears spilling down her cheeks, even as Uther roared lunging for her, murder in his eyes, she shook her head sadly, vanished before he could reach her.
Merlin shook his head, understanding now, why Uther hated magic so much, but then could he have been as vindictive as Uther had in his grief? Oh wait, duh Warlock, well, not that Uther needed to know that.
"So you began the purge" Merlin stated.
"yes" Uther's voice was flat, devoid of emotion.
"I started with the known sorcerers in the kingdom, hunting them down, sometimes for days, weeks at a time. I showed no mercy"
19 Years Earlier.
"We have her trapped, at the back of the building" reported one of the knights who worked with Uther in his crusade. The woman they were chasing, a Maureen Talos, was a supposed healer, people came from far and wide to seek her help. Uther having done so himself years ago. The woman had been younger then, but now, as Uther entered the building he found her to be nothing more than a cowering traitor.
"My lord, Please!" she called, panicked.
"You plea mercy, when your kind killed my beloved wife!" Uther roared. He did not give her time to reply, time to do much of anything, as he swung his sword around, her head falling from her body, even before she had a chance to scream.
"That's was the last one in this area sire" said the knight, bowing to him. Uther nodded.
"Good, we still need to track down the sorcerer in Trador" he said.
"Sire, Trador is Balinor's territory" pointed out another knight, this one young, inexperienced.
"I don't care" Uther replied.
"I hunted them down, across all five kingdoms, the people were afraid, they would see the colours of Camelot and they would cower in fear, people would protect those they knew had magic, those who had even just a small amount, they all fell, attackers, healers, allies…" he admitted, tears now slowly falling from his face.
"I was relentless. I watched, I helped them slaughter. And when people refused to turn over their loved ones, they we're slaughtered too" his voice broke and he took a calming breath, Merlin's own eyes filled with unshed tears.
"Eventually the adults were dead" Uther said.
"what did you do then?" Merlin asked. Uther looked up at him.
"I killed the children" he replied, the comment chilling Merlin to his soul, Merlin closed his eyes, shaking his head softly.
"And then… then it was the time of the Dragons" Uther replied.
Balinor stood across from Uther, in the courtyard of Camelot, bowed down.
"My lord, I came as fast as I could when I received your summons" Balinor said. Uther nodded as he walked forwards.
"No Dragonlord should bow to me" Uther said, Balinor looked up, rising from the ground. "I have…" Uther seemed to be struggling for words. "I have been a fool Lord Balinor, seeking vengeance on those who do not deserve it. My people fear me, they no longer respect me" he said.
"And you expect otherwise?" Balinor asked. Uther looked at him, but chose to ignore the comment.
"My men, we have hunted sorcerers, witches, dragons and other creatures, but only have I succeeded in alienating those who placed their trust in me" he said. Balinor narrowed his eyes.
"What are you getting at?"
"I wish to end this crusade, I wish to atone from my crimes, for they are nothing but crimes" he replied.
"So why do you need me?" Balinor asked. Uther looked at him.
"I have killed many Dragons in my vengeance, I need to speak to them, to explain my actions. To beg forgiveness" Uther replied. Balinor sighed, looking away briefly.
"If I do as you ask Uther, I cannot guarantee what Dragons, if any will come" he replied. Uther nodded.
"But please, I beg you to try" Uther said. Balinor sighed, then nodded.
"I will try Uther" he replied. Uther smiled and moved away from him. Balinor closed his eyes and began to call, across from him, Uther smirked and looked into the shadows, before looking back, above them there was the great beat of wings, Balinor looked over at Uther.
"The oldest of them all, the great Dragon" he whispered, as it landed.
"Why have you called me here?" it demanded, looking at Uther.
"Nobel Kilgharrah, today is a momentous day, Uther Pendragon wishes to… Atone for his crimes" Balinor said.
"Him? Atone? Are you insane? There is no part of him that want's to atone for anything!" it roared.
"Great Dragon please, I beg you to at least hear him out" Balinor said. The Dragon narrowed its eyes.
"Is this true Pendragon? You wish to atone for your actions?" it asked. Uther stepped forwards.
"It is, my actions over the past few years have been unforgivable, and remain so" Uther said.
"What do you mean remain so?" whispered Balinor.
"And I wish to begin my punishment at your hands…. NOW!" he yelled, falling to the floor as several barrels flew from the catapults held in the shadows hitting the great dragon, exploding on it. The Great Dragon roared, but was already staggering.
"You lied!" roared Balinor.
"Guards seize the Dragonlord!" Uther snarled.
"No, you will not have us both Uther!" Kilgharrah roared, belching flames across the courtyard, several guards being burnt to ash.
"You will pay for this Uther, I will return and I promise you will pay for this betrayal of trust!" Balinor roared as he fled. Kilgharrah stumbling before it fell to the floor with a thud.
"we took that one prisoner, moved it into the caverns under the castle, but there were very few Dragons left in the wild and we hunted them, killing them, burning their nests" Uther said. Merlin wiping his eyes. Uther having done so himself. Slowly Merlin stepped forwards. Holding up his hand, then thinking better of it.
"Now do you see boy, do you see what I truly am?" Uther asked softly.
"I can't speak for the Dragons" said Merlin. "I can't speak for the people you killed" he added. Uther turned to look at him, head lowered. "But I do see a man riddled with guilt, with doubts, a man who loved someone so dearly then struck out when she was gone" Merlin said. Uther felt a tear sliding down his cheek, Merlin did put a hand on his arm this time.
"Love is complicated, how you deal, its down to the person" he said gently. Uther's jaw clenching slightly.
"For what its worth Uther, I forgive you" Merlin said, Uther finally breaking down, falling to his knees, Merlin supporting him as he fell.
Morning came all too quickly, Uther having left a few hours before, and Merlin looked up as a guard walked in, he turned Merlin around, before he tied his hands behind his back, then spun him around again.
"Come on" he said. Merlin stood, took a last look around the cell and then, head held high, followed him out. Merlin followed the guards up the stairs, seeing the castle servants watching, some with sympathy, others with veiled interest. Then at the end of the hall, Arthur and Gwen. Gwen was crying, Arthur's arm around her, comforting her. Merlin gave a subtle nod at him, which Arthur returned, before he too looked away, before he was led out of the building to the waiting executioners block. He moved up the steps. Slowly he looked around, Arthur and Gwen had moved outside, standing at the edge of the crowed, Gwen turned away from the scene before them. Merlin smiled, then looked around, before she saw her moving down to stand with them Her face visibly wet from crying.
"I love you" she whispered as Arthur now found himself consoling two sobbing women.
Merlin smiled.
"I'll always love you" he said. From the sides of the courtyard the drum beats began to start. And Uther walked out onto the balcony, his black armour glistening in the morning sun. Merlin looked around again, seeing Gaius who had joined Arthur and Gwen, his eyes red. Merlin smiled at him, forgiving the man, a moment later his knees were knocked from behind and he fell forwards.
"People of Camelot!" Uther called out. "For twenty years I have ruled this kingdom, twenty years of relative peace. Shattered, only occasionally by those who still break our most fundamental laws" he said.
"Before you, the boy, Merlin, stands guilty of treason, and for this, there can be only one penalty. Death" he said. Merlin closed his eyes, as the drum beats began again, and Merlin was roughly pushed forwards. Uther raised his hand, the executioner's axe also raising.
"But, I am not a man without compassion" Uther stated suddenly. "Although he is the Dragonlord, Balinor's, son, and when Balinor dies, he will become Dragonlord, I find myself wavering. No son should pay for the crimes of the father" he said. "Release him" he ordered. The crowd gasped, even as the execution put down the axe, and then hauled Merlin to his feet, releasing the ropes that bound his wrists.
"I owe this boy a great debt, and even though I have broken my own laws this day, I cannot justify the ending of one that has such potential. And I owe it to myself, to get past the blame" he said, then went quiet. A moment later the crowd went wild with applause. The executioner even giving him a friendly pat on the back, and how bloody weird was that? Slowly Merlin bowed to the king, Uther smiled and nodded. Merlin got down from the executioners stand, grinning at people as they laughed in joy, then there she was, standing in front of him. He smiled, rushing to her, embracing her openly, the crowd watching.
"Merlin…." Morgana's face was one of fine beauty.
"I love you" he said to her, then they kissed, passionately.
"here we go again" muttered Arthur, as around them the crowed cheered. Gwen beaming suddenly threw her arms around Arthur kissing him, then pulling away.
"Oh… my god…" she said.
"You…. Kissed me!" he said, blinking in terror.
"Lost in the moment" she replied.
"I bloody hope so" Arthur retorted.
"So what do you think Merlin? Gwen and Arthur?" Morgana teased. Merlin gave a mock bow.
"My lady" he said.
"Ok you can quit it now" said Arthur.
"No, Morgana has a point" Said Merlin. "Arthur and Guinevere, has a nice ring to it" he said. Arthur's face went hard then.
"Merlin" he warned. Merlin gave Morgana a quick kiss on the cheek.
"Arthur and Gwen then?" he offered.
"MERLIN!" Arthur roared as Merlin began running, the prince speeding after him. "WHEN I GET HOLD OF YOU!"
Up on the balcony Uther laughed, watching his son chase after Merlin. Feeling at peace finally for the first time in years. A moment later Gaius moved to his side.
"That was quite a change of heart" Gaius said.
"I spoke to him, last night, even with the threat of death Gaius, even with that he forgave me, for everything. You're right. He is special" Uther said.
"MERLIN!" Arthur's cry echoed across the courtyard.
"OW!" Merlin's shout echoed back. The crowed laughing even harder as Arthur came running back, Merlin chasing him with a broom, the laughter being drowned out as the sun was blotted out. Slowly everyone looked up to see a large cobalt coloured Dragon there.
"Enjoy your last days Uther, for the Dragons are rising" it growled, then with a beat of wings, flew off. Slowly Uther looked at Gaius, then down at Arthur, Merlin and Morgana, Leon stepping over to them, with Gwen.
"If he wants war, then he will have it" Uther said.
"For Camelot!" Yelled Merlin. The cry being taken up around the courtyard.
"So it seems your son has chosen his side" said Morgause as they watched from their headquarters in the late Godfry's castle.
"So be it" muttered Balinor. "If he fights for Camelot, then he can die with it" he replied, turning and walking away. Morgause turning back to the crystal, watching as Merlin and Morgana embraced again.
"But not you sister. No, not you" she whispered.
To Be continued….