A/N: Just want to say Thank You all for your reviews, favs, and follows! I apologize for the painfully long delay in writing this chapter. I know you understand how life, and home renovation, can sometimes take away writing time.
I had a really great time combing through my music library to compile the 'Miranda Mix' list. I hope you enjoy.
CHAPTER 10
As Miranda undressed she found herself singing along, her hips involuntarily keeping the beat.
"I'm a bitch, I'm a bitch. Oh The Bitch is back. Stone cold sober as a matter of fact. I can bitch, I can bitch 'cause I'm better than you. It's the way that I move, the things that I do OHOhoh."
Miranda began removing her make up as the next song began.
Miranda smirked into the mirror, "Why thank you, Andrea, darling." Miranda was quite enjoying the very thorough stroking her ego was receiving at the moment as the chorus sang.
(One - A Chorus Line)
'One singular sensation, every little step she takes. One thrilling combination, every move that she makes. One smile and suddenly nobody else will do. You know you'll never be lonely with you know who. One moment in her presence and you can forget the rest. For the girl is second best to none son. Ooo sigh, give her your attention, do I really have to mention, she's the one.'
Miranda glided to her shower with noticeably more grace than was customary when alone.
The next song began as she shampooed her hair. Miranda was not familiar with this one as the big band brass section made the intro.
(Stuff Like That There – Bette Midler)
I was alone on a shelf in a world by myself. Oh, where could my Prince Charming be? But a man came along, made my life like a song, and taught me these words of ecstasy, tenderly. I want some huggin' and some squeezin' and some muggin' and some teasin'
and some stuff like that there. I want some pettin' and some spoonin'
and some happy honeymoonin' and some stuff like that there.
Miranda let out a bark of laughter, "HA!…Stuffff…..cheeky girl." Miranda shook her head chuckling.
Miranda was just finishing rinsing the conditioner out of her hair and smiled softly. Now this was a song that she knew very well. Miranda hummed along feeling flattered that Andrea would associate this song to her and it pleased her that Andrea's taste in music was so varied.
(The Very Thought of You – Ella Fitzgerald)
The mere idea of you, the longing here for you. You'll never know how slow the moments go till I'm near to you. I see your face in every flower, your eyes in stars above. It's just the thought of you, the very thought of you, my love.
Miranda had finished her shower and toweled off. Just reaching to plug in her hair dryer she was startled by the loud, and embarrassingly familiar, entrance of brass horns. She fumbled the hair dryer grabbing for it, fumbling it again, she finally caught in her hands as Joe Cocker belted out the opening lyrics.
(You Can Leave Your Hat On – Joe Cocker)
'Baby take off your coat, real slow. And take off your shoes, I'll take off your shoes. Baby take off your dress. Yes, yes, yes. You can leave your hat on. You can leave your hat on. You can leave your hat on.'
Miranda blushed scarlet from head to toe knowing full well that this was a 'strip' song, no way around it. You can't call it anything else. It is a sexy song you play to strip naked for a lover. Miranda stood frozen staring as her imagination ran wild recalling a certain pair of Chanel boots.…her Andrea in those boots….her Andrea in those boots standing on a chair….her Andrea in those boots standing on a chair…naked.
'Put your arms up in the air…now shake'em
You give me reason to live. You give me reason to live. You give me reason to live. You give me reason to live.'
Miranda was startled out of her fantasy by a tickle. A tickle of warmth slowly running down her inner thigh. "Oh damn it Andrea.." Miranda groused as she stomped back to the shower to clean herself up…using cold water.
Miranda was drying herself off with the towel, again, as an unfamiliar song began, a sultry female voice singing.
(Straight to Number One by Touch and Go – the Queer as Folk version)
'Ten…kiss me on the lips… Nine…run your fingers thru my hair…Eight…touch me…slowly…touch me…slowly…Seven….hold it…let's go straight…to number One.'
As the very erotic muted-trumpet started to play, Miranda felt her eyes roll into the back of her head, as the music took her right back to the moment, and the feeling, of surrendering completely to Andrea.
'Six…lips…Five…fingers…Four…play...Three…to number One.'
Miranda felt her body responding to the images flooding her mind of her Andrea tasting her, penetrating her, stroking her walls, then with her other hand taking her from behind as well. "Oh Yes Andrea!" Miranda cried out her eyes flew wide open as her hips bucked. Miranda felt her core spasm and the familiar tickle of moisture between her legs.
"Oh for heaven's sake!" Miranda rolled her eyes at herself and quickly moved to the cd player to skip to the next song.
In the shower, AGAIN, Miranda heard Ella Fitzgerald's voice. "Thank God!" she said aloud. Ella she knew, Ella was safe.
(Darn That Dream – Ella Fitzgerald)
Darn that dream I dream each night. You say you love me and hold me tight. Darn that one track mind of mine. It can't understand that you don't care. Just to change the mood I'm in I'd welcome a nice old nightmare. Darn that dream, and bless it too. Without that dream I never have you. But it haunts me and it won't come true. Oh, darn that dream
But when I awake and you're out of sight. Oh, darn that dream. Darn your lips and darn your eyes. They lift me high above the moonlit sky. Then I tumble out of paradise. Oh, darn that dream.
Miranda paused the cd player as she used her hair dryer. Once her signature forelock was dried and in its proper place, she released the pause button.
Miranda sighed "Oh no." She knew this song as well. Miranda tried to brace herself for the painful angst she knew she was about to feel.
If Miranda were to make a cd for Andrea this song would be on it.
(If I Loved You - from the musical Carousel – Barbra Streisand)
'If I loved you, time and again I would try to say all I'd want you to know. If
I loved you words wouldn't come in an easy way round in circles I'd go. Longing
to tell you but afraid and shy. I'd let my golden chances pass me by. Soon
you'd leave me, off you would go in the mist of day, never, never, to know how I loved you. If I loved you.'
Miranda brushed away a stray tear when the song ended and reminded herself that that is no longer their story. Miranda tried to busy herself applying her moisturizers. Surprised as the next song began to play. The upbeat, happy piano intro was drastically different to what she had just listened to.
(You and Me - Victor/Victoria)
You and me, we're the kind of people other people would like to be. Wand'ring free, we present the kind of picture, people are glad to see.
Miranda tilted her head as she listened to the lyrics. A chill ran down her spine as she recalled a time, not long ago, when she was still in denial about her feelings for the girl and what she had said to Andrea came back to her in vivid detail, "Don't be ridiculous Andrea, everyone wants to be us."
Miranda hurried to her night stand to retrieve her reading glasses and picked up the cd case as she entered the en suite bringing it into the bright light. She turned the case over and just as she suspected, "Oh Andrea" she sighed, the songs told their story from Andrea's perspective. Andrea had even left hand written notes next to the neatly typed list of songs and artists.
1. The Bitch is Back – Elton John In the beginning!
2. One – A Chorus Line Miranda descending the stairs (actually anytime)
3. Stuff Like That There – Bette Midler So yeah…I'm starting to lust after my boss
4. The Very Thought of You – Ella Fitzgerald I think I care more than I should
5. You Can Leave Your Hat On – Joe Cocker damn that white wrap-around blouse
6. Straight to Number One – Touch and Go (Queer As Folk version) Damn That White Wrap-around Blouse!
7. Darn That Dream – Ella Fitzgerald DAMN THAT WHITE WRAP-AROUND BLOUSE!
8. If I Loved You – Carousel Barbra Streisand Seeing Miranda in tears in Paris
9. You & Me – Victor/Victoria Julie Andrews/Robert Preston The limo in Paris
10. I Try – Macy Gray The fountain in Paris
11. If Ever I Would Leave You – Camelot The apology in Paris – realizing I'm in love with Miranda
12. You Don't Know Me – Patricia Barber Enter the 'next Mr. Priestly', a douche-bag from the Met Board, at Publishers Gala
13. Smile – Nat King Cole Trying to survive
14. Distance – Christina Perri see 13
15. Hope Has a Place – Enya No more 'Next Mr. Priestly'!
16. Beauty and the Beast – Angela Lansbury My fairy tale…
17. That's All I Ask of You – Phantom of the Opera see 16
Miranda swallowed back her emotions as she listened to Macy Gray, remembering how she almost lost Andrea that day by a Paris fountain.
(I Try – Macy Gray)
I try to say goodbye and I choke, try to walk away and I stumble. Here is my confession, may I be your possession. Boy, I need your touch, your love kisses, and such. With all my might I try, but this I can't deny, deny. I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you. I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin.
Though I try to hide it, it's clear, my world crumbles when you are not near.
Goodbye and I choke, try to walk away and I stumble. Though I try to hide it, it's clear my world crumbles when you are not near.
I try to say goodbye and I choke, try to walk away and I stumble.
Though I try to hide it, it's clear, my world crumbles when you are not near.
Goodbye and I choke, try to walk away and I stumble. Though I try to hide it, it's clear my world crumbles when you are not near.
Miranda was trying to apply her make-up, but her hands were shaking. Miranda forgot about getting ready as the next song began to play. She knew it well as it pushed her worst button, being left. Miranda has abandonment issues, she knows it, she tries to deal with it. But for the duration of this song all she can do is hold tight to the edge of the counter with both hands.
(If Ever I Would Leave You – Camelot)
But if I'd ever leave you, It couldn't be in autumn. How I'd leave in autumn I never will know. I've seen how you sparkle When fall nips the air. I know you in autumn
And I must be there.
And could I leave you Running merrily through the snow? Or on a wintry evening
When you catch the fire's glow? If ever I would leave you, How could it be in springtime? Knowing how in spring I'm bewitched by you so?
Oh, no! not in springtime!
Summer, winter or fall!
No, never could I leave you at all!
By the time the song was over Miranda's knuckles were a ghostly white and they ached painfully.
A slow jazz piano began to play a somewhat familiar melody. Then recognition dawned as a woman's voice began to sing.
(You Don't Know Me - Patricia Barber)
Miranda listened to the beautifully painful rendition trying to apply her eyeliner but failing miserably as she felt the sting of tears, she decided to get dressed instead.
I never knew the art of making love. Though my heart aches with love for you.
Afraid and shy, I let my chance go by. A chance that you might love me too.
You give your hand to me and then you say, "Goodbye". I watch you walk away beside some lucky guy. Oh, you'll never, never know the one who loves you so.
No, you don't know me.
"Oh Darling, he was nothing more than a prop." Miranda whispered as she recalled the time shortly after Paris when, in spite of the divorce, there were still public appearances to be made. So she had called upon an acquaintance, one of the board members from the Met, to escort her to several functions.
(Smile – Nat King Cole)
Smile though your heart is aching, Smile even though it's breaking Light up your face with gladness. Hide every trace of sadness. Although a tear may be ever so near, that's the time you must keep on trying. Smile, what's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile.
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by. If you smile through your fear and sorrow, Smile and maybe tomorrow, you'll see the sun come shining through for you.
Hind sight is 20/20 she thought regretfully. She hadn't seen it then, but now it was clear. The stricken expression on Andrea's face as she had descended the stairs on his arm at the Publisher's gala. That during the event, and after, Andrea would not look her in the eye. The next day Page Six had declared him 'The Next Mr. Priestly' and their fledgling friendly banter began to fade with each passing event. Andrea's smile had become forced, and the light in her eyes had noticably dimmed.
(Distance – Christina Perri)
Please don't stand so close to me, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm afraid of what you'll see right now. I give you everything I am, all my broken heart beats. Until I know you'll understand. And I will make sure to keep my distance. Say, "I love you," when you're not listening. And how long can we keep this up, up, up?
The abrupt change in Andrea had confused Miranda, it had never occurred to her that Andrea might hold feelings for her as well. It was not until the fourth outing that Miranda began to have hope. Miranda had spotted Andrea in the corner of the ballroom standing next to large marble column. The girl was obviously watching them dance. On the next pass around the dance floor the man had pulled Miranda closer to his body, sliding his hand down to the small of her back. Miranda saw the sparkle of tears in Andrea's eyes as she hung her head turning away to flee down a darkened corridor. Miranda felt the flicker of hope, she quickly made her excuses to the man to pursue Andrea discretely. She found her near the end of that lonely corridor sitting on a bench, dabbing at her eyes with a tissue. Miranda had startled her when she spoke softly, "Andrea are you alright?.". For the first time in weeks Andrea had turned to face her and made eye contact, the heart break she saw in those dark eyes took her breath away. Andrea has stuttered through her tears, "I'm sorry Miranda. I want.…I can't watch.…" Andrea had forced a small defeated smile "I think I'm just tired." Miranda knew there was more she wanted to say, that fear was holding her back. Miranda vowed she would never be the cause of that look in her Andrea's eyes again. So, no more escorts, just the two of them attending events, and sure enough their playful banter began again and the light slowly returned to Andrea's eyes.
(Hope Has A Place – Enya)
One look at love and you may see, It weaves a web over mystery. Whispering world a sigh of sighs. The ebb and the flow of the ocean tides.
All ravelled threads can rend apart. For hope has a place in the lover's heart.
Hope has a place in a lover's heart.
One breath, one word may end or may start a hope in a place of the lover's heart.
Hope has a place in a lover's heart.
Miranda had finished dressing, her emotions lifting listening to Enya's silky voice. Slipping on her shoes she made her way back to the en suite to finish her make-up. She smirked hearing Angela Lansbury begin to sing Beauty & the Beast.
One more head to toe look in the mirror, she nodded once. Miranda made her way back into her bedroom to pour herself a drink and sit down for a moment to listen to the last song and then call her girls.
(That's All I Ask of You – from The Phantom of the Opera)
[Raoul]
Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime
Let me lead you from your solitude
Say you need me with you here, beside you
Anywhere you go let, me go too
Christine, that's all I ask of you
[Christine]
Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime
Say the word and I will follow you
[Both]
Share each day with me each night, each morning,
[Christine]
Say you love me
[Raoul]
You know I do
[Both]
Love me, that's all I ask of you
Miranda smiled softly, she mused that her signature dismissal of "That's all." will no longer hold quite the same bite that it used to after this. Miranda spoke aloud talking to herself. "So my Darling wants the fairy tale…and so she shall have it."
Miranda reached for her phone.
"Hello Bobbsey Darling, is your sister with you?"
"Yeah Mom, she's right here." Caroline replied.
"Are you able to put me on speaker Darling, I need to talk to both of you."
"Sure Mom, one sec" Caroline looked at Cass worried, their Mother sounded nervous.
Miranda listened to two sets of scurrying feet and then a door slam shut.
"Ok Mom, were both here." Caroline said. "Mom you okay?" Cass asked.
"Yes Bobbsey I'm fine. Girls I know how fond you are of Andrea…" Miranda began and was quickly cut off.
"Andy?" "What's wrong?" "Is she okay?" "Did you two have a fight?"
"Girls" Miranda tried to interrupt the rapid fire questioning.
"What did you fight about?" "You didn't fire her did you?" "We really like her Mom!"
"Girls!" Miranda tried again, rubbing the bridge of her nose.
"I thought you really liked Andy too?" "You can't let her leave Mom! You can't!" "Get her back!" "You have to fix it!"
"GIRLS!" finally Miranda broke through.
"Sorry Mom" the girls apologized in unison.
"Girls, Andrea is fine. No we did not have a fight. No I did not fire her. And yes I really like her too. I wanted to ask if the two of you would be open to Andrea spending more…private time with us?" Miranda barely had the question out of her mouth before she had her enthusiastic reply.
"Sweeeet!" "Yessss!" "Does this mean your dating now?" "Finally!" "No kidding!" "Have you kissed her yet?" "When is she moving in?" "Do we have to call her Mom too?" "Do you love her Mom?"
Miranda held the phone away from her ear as she chuckled. "Yes, I believe our first official date is the ball this evening. Yes I have kissed her. We haven't discussed a move-in date. No, you do not have to call her Mom. And yes, Darling, I do love her…I love her very much."
"Sweet!" "Awesome!"
Miranda could hear the 'high-five' they gave each other.
"She is spending vacation with us there next week, right?"
"Ah…" Miranda stumbled and realized she hadn't even mentioned it yet.
"You haven't asked her?" "Why haven't you asked her?" "You have to ask her Mom!" "What if she has other plans?"
"Girls, I promise you, I will ask her this evening. Now, my Darlings, homework done?"
"Yes Mom." Came the exasperated reply in unison.
"Teeth brushed? Ready for bed?" Miranda was smiling.
"Yes Mother." The precious off-spring replied with annoyance.
"Very well. I love you my Darlings."
"Love you too Mom!" "Have fun tonight!" "Tell Andy we said Hi!"
"And Bobbseys?...Thank you."
"We love you Mom!" "Love you Mom!"
"Goodnight my Darlings. I'll call you tomorrow."
"Night Mom!"
Miranda hung up her phone smiling, feeling relieved and so very blessed.
She turned picking up her mask as she exited the bedroom. It was time to pick up her date!