A/n First off, thank you to UKnoULuvAnna for reviewing. Seriously, *HUG*. Just for that, I give you cookies. You know the drill, homemade ones are poisonous, here's a gift card for Starbucks.

In case that's not enough, we used your suggestion. Yay! :D

Unusually (and mercifully) short a/n today. Hm. Well, here's a funny chapter, originally from Ange0695, co-author, and pretty hilarious when she wants to be.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! Along with many other holidays that I missed while putting this off…sorry!

Fang POV

2 months before...

I followed Carlisle down the stairs nervously, my head flipping in every direction, taking in the house, namely it's possible escape routes. My gaze was drawn towards a wall made completely of transparent glass, through which a deep green, flourishing forest was visible on the far side of a wide and calm river. I frowned, as that escape route was effectively blocked by the expanse of liquid. As I scrutinized the other possible exits, I couldn't help but slip into a slight crouch as I noticed each of them blocked by the abnormally pale strangers. The smug looks on two of the male's faces, the burly one and the bronze-haired one, only served to clench my fists as I glared darkly at each of them in turn.

We reached the bottom of the stairs, and I glanced back at Iggy quickly, unable to do more at the moment than arch an eyebrow questioningly. She mouthed 'no' in response to my silent question, and tore her gaze away from mine, attempting to hide the obvious fear in her eyes. I whipped my head around and locked on to the source of a stifled snort. It was the big one again, the one blocking the most vulnerable escape routes. As we continued walking, I gave him my well-practiced death glare, expecting him to shut up. He did exactly the opposite. As the surprise faded from his face, he gave a mischievous grin that I swore reached his ears.

This, as you could assume, pissed me off. As most of the people on my bad side can tell you, that is never a good idea. Acting instinctively as something akin to adrenaline flooded my head, I slipped lithely into a full hunting crouch and let out a deep, threatening, growl, which reverberated around the room and effectively scared the pants off rocks-for-brains, who had had the genius idea to mock me after I had just been KIDNAPPED, possibly KILLED, put through an indescribable amount of TORTURE, and told I was a LIFE-SUCKING, UNDEAD MONSTER!

Not even bothering to wait for my guide as he walked away and began to reprimand the joker, I turned and walked towards the door he had been leading us towards, hearing Ig hesitantly fall into step behind me. I was fixated on a point directly in front of me, with my chin held up. If I had made eye contact even once with anyone in this room, my visage would instantly betray how truly shaken I was. I quickly clasped my shaking hands together. I had sounded like...an animal.

Iggy POV

I gaped open-mouthed at Fang, watching her straighten up and continue walking towards the door. I quickly closed my mouth and quickly caught up to her, warily sizing her up. What was that? I knew from experience that she had a fiery temper at times, but I had never heard her growl like that! I caught sight of her shaking hands before she hurriedly clasped them in front of her. At least she was as shocked as I was.

I shrugged it off. She could get mad sometimes. Glancing behind us at the very attractive men gathered around...who was it? Carl?...I decided that they had to be supermodels. My gaze alighted upon the bronze haired one again, and I discreetly smoothed my hair, before remembering to watch where I was going. Narrowly avoiding an unsuspecting coffee table, I finally joined Fang outside, a few meters beyond the house. She whispered suddenly out of the corner of her mouth, "Be careful what you say. I don't trust these guys." Her eyes never moved, and she was standing tensely, her fists still tight at her sides.

I pretended to be inspecting my shirt for dirt, and gave a slight affirmative nod. "Carl's coming. Sh," I replied, my whisper almost inaudible. A roar of laughter came from the house, and I turned to find the bear-like one's mirth penetrating the apparently soundproof glass. As Fang groaned, probably imagining something along the lines of a violent butt-kicking, a slight crooked smile alighted upon the bronze-haired one's lips, and the laughs boomed, vibrating some of the thinner windows. As she whirled, I grabbed her arm. "Fang, stop. We can't afford to do this right now." And I don't want his brother's face to be caught in the crossfire. I silently giggled to myself.

She relaxed slightly and leaned back, crossing her arms. Her hands were curled into tight balls, her fingernails scraping against her skin. "Yeah, but I sure as hell want to." I gave up as she narrowed her eyes, bright red irises trained on the super-muscle guy.

After a few more indecipherable glances and mouthed words, Carl flitted back over to us. I jumped back, emitting a short squeak. Fang just rolled her eyes and stood her ground. Glancing at the group inside the house, I quickly hid my blush by twisting my head around to brush some imaginary dust off of my shoulder. After waiting for a few seconds for the rush of heat, I mentally shrugged. It never came. Whatever.

Carl gave a sympathetic half smile. "I apologize for Emmett. He's not as…eloquent as some of us." I nodded distractedly, glancing over the blond vamp's shoulder. I don't care how dumb he is, with muscles like that. My attention was drawn to Edward as he suddenly exploded with laughter. I brushed my hair behind my ear self-consciously. Was there something on my face?

It was really starting to get annoying though. Just shut up…ugh. I purposefully looked away as Carl kept talking. My fingers curled into claws as the laughter grated on my ears. Clenching my teeth, I kept my face rigid.

"As I was saying, would you like to follow me? It is usually best to feed as soon as possible. Newborns are often volatile, and are best kept sated." My gaze flitted to the laughing one again. A growl rolled up my throat. Stop LAUGHING. I furrowed my brow, irrational anger whirling. Shut up, shut up, shut UP! I looked up as the laughter was cut off suddenly, followed by a thunk as something hit the floor.

Edward was lying face-first on the hardwood, arms sprawled out with his palms up. My eyes widened, and I burst out giggling. Underlying the humor was a dark current of triumph, which I gladly welcomed. I did it, I beat him, I made him stop, YES!

My celebrating was cut short as Fang tapped my shoulder. Carlisle was frozen in place, in between us and the river, apparently having moved while I was taking care of him. He quickly recovered and motioned for us to walk in front, his gaze now untrustworthy. GOOD. I beat him, he knows it. I can beat them.

After watching Carlisle demonstrate several times, and landing in the river once or twice, we managed to reach the other bank. My eyes flitted around, taking in every detail of the forest. Green. Bugs. Birds nest in the tree at 2 o'clock. 22 trees within 15 meters. Scratching. Water. Throat burning.

The little part of my brain that was still sane was nagging at me, telling me that something was wrong. I shoved it away and focused on my throat. It was so scratchy and raw and hot and…

Fang again nudged me with her elbow. "Ig. You there?" I coughed, trying to clear my throat of the burning, and nodded. Not bothering to meet her eyes, I unconsciously bent my knees a little bit, freezing in place. There was a scent, there. I focused in on Carl. He smelled of…a hundred things flipped through my brain. Nothing fit. I shook it off. His mouth was moving. He was saying something.

"…keep walking. I'll find a scent, and then I will instruct you on what to do. It's very simple, really." He gave a placating smile, then turned and started running in one fluid motion. Fang hesitated for a moment, then looked over at me. "Let's go. We need to find out more about this." She rubbed her throat distractedly, and locked her gaze with mine one more time. "C'mon." Twisting suddenly, she pushed off, listening intently.

I grinned. Sure. Whatever. I just want to RUN! Gathering my legs beneath me, I dug my fingers into the Earth, and pushed off with a powerful leap that sent me flying through the trees. My grin widened as I hit the ground and dug my now-bare feet (my shoes had come loose when I was struggling in the river) into the ground briefly before springing forward, feet barely touching the ground. I laughed with the pure power that was coursing through me, barely even paying attention to my surroundings. In a split second, a tree reared in front of me, and even as I backpedaled frantically, my hurtling body demolished the tree. I shook my head, dazed, then sped forward even faster.

I did a lightning fast double take as Fang's face sped past me. Digging my heels in, I grabbed an overhead tree branch and, like a gymnast, flung myself into the air. Twisting, I landed cat-like on the top branch, facing the way I came.

Grinning ferally, I launched myself into the air, reveling in the birds-eye view of the dusky forest treetops and light purple sky. I zeroed in on the clearing containing Fang and Carl, angling my body like an arrow. As the air whipped past me, I screamed giddily, slamming into the ground in front of them in a dead crouch, one hand touching the ground.

Fang's shocked face barely even registered as I straightened up. I was lost in a haze of giddy euphoria. "Ig? Just…" She was lost for words, and her mouth hung open. I wanted to laugh, so I did.

Fang POV

My mouth hung open as what I thought was Ig laughed, a ringing, cold sound that echoed through the trees. I need to…talk. "Ig? Just…" What do I say? This wasn't the girl I knew. Something was wrong.

Forcing down the persistent burning in my throat, I tamped down on all my senses. The skittering of millions of insects slowly faded, and as I inhaled deeply through my mouth and closed my eyes, the overwhelming cascade of information retreated to the back of my mind.

Opening my eyes, I clenched my hands yet again. In the blink of an eye, I was facing Carlisle, my eyes burning with all the fire that was hidden in my throat. "What did you do to her? Don't start with that vampire BS again. They don't exist. So stop with all the phony crap and TELL ME!"

He was unfazed by my outburst, smiling kindly. "I'm not lying to you, sweetheart. Vampires exist. I admit, we are not quite like the legends, but we are real." Somehow, his 'patronizing smile' didn't quite have the effect he wanted it to. A growl rumbled in my throat, and it was all I could do to stop myself from swinging at him. Glaring fiercely, I opened my mouth to scream at him some more.

"I know that this is very hard to accept right now, but give it time. We'll help you adjust."

I lunged at him, darting to the side at the last moment. In a split second, I was in front of him once again. My fingers dug into my palms, and I had to fight to keep from lashing out. "Don't EVER cut me off." I hissed from between my teeth. "Something isn't right. This. Is. Not. Her. What's going ON?" The last word was screamed right in his face.

I was tall enough to look almost directly into his eyes, and I made up for lack of height with my blazing glare. His perfectly calm façade never wavered, and after two terse seconds that seemed to stretch out forever, he replied. "I would prefer to not have to subdue you, but I will if I must. If you would kindly relax, I will explain the situation." His voice never wavered, but his eyes were hard.

I stayed rigid, then snapped back to reality as I realized what I was doing. Get a hold of yourself. Calm down. No emotion. I struggled for a second against my instincts, then stepped back. I kept my entire body tightly controlled, and continued backing up until I was standing beside Ig. I gave her a fleeting once over, noting her dilated pupils and the way her head darted everywhere, the slight bend of her knees, the way her arms were lifted away from her body. She was blank.

Crossing my arms tightly across my chest, I focused on Carlisle. "Talk." I half-growled the word.

He nodded, acknowledging my request. "What your friend is currently experiencing is the result of delaying the hunt. She is consumed by the need to feed, as you will soon be." His gaze flicked down to my neck, and I realized I had uncrossed one arm and was rubbing the smooth skin of my throat. I scowled and tucked the rebellious hand under my arm. He gave a small smile, and continued. "Do you feel the burning in your throat? That will only get worse as we continue to talk. The longer we wait, the more intense the craving will become."

I glared daggers. He was right, I could feel it. "Fine. But let's get one thing straight – we are NOT drinking…human blood." The burning in my throat flared, and I swallowed dryly.

Carlisle smiled again, that stupid perfect smile that I was really beginning to hate. "Of course not, dear." My eyes narrowed again at the word 'dear', but he continued. "You see, we are…well, we call ourselves 'vegetarians'." He chuckled humorlessly at the term. "Unlike others like ourselves, we refrain from feeding on humans. We are sustained, instead, by the blood of animals. It is not exactly ideal, but it is a working solution."

I nodded, carefully wiping my face clean of disgust at him and myself. My mouth was flooded with saliva despite my conscious effort to ignore the hunger. Shifting uncomfortably, I glanced over at Ig once again, who was now frozen with her nostrils flared. If she weren't contemplating the possible option of blood for lunch, it would have been comical.

I needed to speak for her, as well. She didn't really seem to be capable of speech, anyways. "So when is this little training camp going to be over?" My tone was icy, and I was extremely conscious of Ig's searching gaze.

Carlisle's smooth voice started again. "Amanda? That is your name, right?" I nodded, trying to ignore the layers of his voice. Get a freaking grip. "Over your first few years, I would suggest that you stay with us. We can provide accommodations for you and your friend as you adjust to your new lives, and guide you through what you will need to learn for the rest of your existences."

My mind reeled. "What? A few years?" My tone was thick with sarcasm, hiding the ever-growing rage. "Yeah, that's not going to work. Shorten it, and try again. When can we go home?"

Carlisle sighed softly, his perfect features frozen in a perfectly mimicked impression of remorse. "I'm sorry, girls, but you can never go home."

A/N I know, it's been over half a year. Extra long chapter though. Yay? Tips are highly appreciated; I'm extremely rusty and would REALLY love some advice. Really, even if it's just a grammar issue or a misspelled word!

Don't kill me! -hides under pillow-