A.N. – Thoughts, when not a simple part of the point-of-view will be in italics; including Kyuubi – since the only way the 'talks' is via thought. His, however, will be bold as well as italicized, to differentiate between his thoughts and Naruto's thoughts. PoV changes and flashbacks will be announced in bold.

I HAVE A POLL ON MY PROFILE ABOUT KAKASHI AND IRUKA. VOTE! IT WILL AFFECT THE PLOT!

Warnings: This chapter contains extremely dark material. Bad language. Adult themes. NC-17!

Oh, and review please.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything Naruto belongs to Kishimoto Masashi. I'm just envious of that.

Gimme a Sign

Naruto's PoV

What? How.. I mean he.. didn't he? How? WHEN?

Complete sentences… use your language skills, then I'll know what you are talking about.

That asshole… he.. he…

Yes?

He WORSHIPS me. How the HELL am I supposed to take that? What does it mean? When did it happen? HE can't have … he…

Okay, you're not using sentences AGAIN. I'll just do this the easy way; raid your memories.

You can do that?

…Yeah..

Huh.
Wait! Stop distracting me! What do I do about that asshole?

The fox blink a bit, before curling in on himself. Well, THAT'S interesting. Oh, and nothing. He admires you for your current behavior and personality; so there is nothing to do.

How am I supposed to take it?

He shifted; he was a four-legged animal, so he couldn't really shrug. Take it however you please.

But, then – how, just HOW? How could he have

Tried to kill you? Come so close that even missing you heart, apparently on purpose, you still nearly died? The gravelly voice was harsh as he cut off my rambling thoughts. But, he was harsh most of the time I heard him, until very recently; anger was his go-to emotion.

It sounds like he was trying to do what a good ninja is supposed to do and failing. Cutting off emotions and doing what is necessary for the mission regardless. You should be pleased; the one who so often calls you a failure is an even bigger failure himself.

That's what you think?

If the torture master is telling the truth, and I think he is, then that is what I know.

I was too tall now to swing my legs to use up some of my nervous energy, so I crossed them instead. I stared across the table, more at the wall beside his head than at the scarred face in front of me. "I'm okay now, I've calmed down. Please continue, sir."

He gave a broad grin, one that gave half the chuunin competitors nightmares, and all but rubbed his hands in glee. I was briefly reminded this guy finds torturing people for a living fun - seriously, he made his living torturing people, and thought it was fun! His smiling like that could only mean terrible, terrible things.

"Okay, so we've established if you do this, you'd need to go house-hunting. We've established family is a dirty word to a certain psychotic villain. I think that leads into he obviously does not want to rebuild his clan, and girls are a no-no for obvious reasons." He looked at me. "I know you're straight, and you're going to want sex some time. It is a natural biological imperative. You'd never be able to bring her home, or have kids with her, if you did find some honey willing to put up with being the girl on the side. And, he'd never be able to find out; he'd kill you."

"What?"

"Even if the two of you never did the nasty, if you spoke vows and fidelity was included, breaking them would cost you all that trust that you have through several near-death experiences, won. You'd lose your un-killable status the second he found out."

I blinked. That… made sense, in a creepy, serial killer sort of way. Then again, this was the bastard we are talking about… creepy serial killer does describe how he thinks!

"Hmm. Oh, yeah… He didn't kill Kabuto just to save his life. After taking out the two Madaras, and taking him on, you were looking tired and out of chakra to him. An infinite army of living dead would have killed you; so he killed Kabuto before that could happen."

How many surprises am I in for? Did I ever really know my jack ass of a friend at all?

"Want to know how he felt about Orochimaru?"

… a lot, apparently. I grabbed some tea, and ordered my demon to stop laughing at me, not that he listened.

"Give me a second to process that last bit. This is going to be a long night, isn't it?"

"If you keep making me stop and wait every time I tell you something you did not expect; yes."

"Thought so." I drank deeply, savoring the surprising choice of lavender and chamomile. He gestured to offer me more and I responded with a slashing motion from my hand. More and I would float away.

"So, about the snake sennin; ready to know?"

I nodded.

"Okay. Well, he made a few very specific demands before he agreed to be the pupil and future vessel of Orochimaru. The obvious was power, but he also asked two questions as tests. One was for the safety of the Leaf village. The other was for protection from the women in Sound."

I snorted at the protection for the village; how could he ever believe Orochimaru would keep that one? But, the other; that one really bothered me. Why would he ask that of the snake creep but not of the Third?

"He knew from past experiences that here in the Leaf, even if he told someone, it did not stop. He also was frequently drugged; the source of his dislike of sweets, I suspect. Being drugged made it impossible for him to defend himself, even once he was old enough to do so. The attacks had slowed down, and became more rare the stronger and more alert he became, so by the time he left, they were rare, but… still happening. So, this was a very key test from Sasuke. The elders of the Leaf had already betrayed his trust in this very specific way. Orochimaru kept it."

Damn. He was safer with that evil creep than here.

"It was key in earning Sasuke's trust. It was a weak and limited trust, but there was one, nonetheless. Sai broke it."

Sai? What did Sai do?

"When he entered the hideout undercover for his mission, he used smuggling information about the Leaf that one would only need for an attack as his cover. And, foolish enough to believe Sasuke was under his thumb, Orochimaru did not even hide his intentions; he bragged about them. His trust, already weak to start with, shattered. Sasuke immediately began planning how to kill him instead of becoming his vessel. It was just a matter of timing after that."

After all I said, after all the work I put in; the one who saved Sasuke from Orochimaru was… SAI?

Don't get angry, Blondie. At least he did wake up before it was too late.

I guess.

"He also reinforced to Sasuke how important you were, by blowing his cover and refusing to fulfill his assassination mission out of loyalty to you and out of your wishes for Sasuke's safety."

I blinked.

"How much of a surprise would it be that Sasuke's not nearly as much a blood thirsty murderer as the general population thinks he is?"

"Pretty big?" I was guessing it was a good thing I wasn't a cat, and that no one really died of shock; I would be out of lives by now.

"He did not wipe out that village, though his team was responsible, and he did kill some of the people in it. He was only after the spies and lackeys of Orochimaru within the township, but his team went a little overboard and then the local police force caught on and started going after them. One thing led to another, and it was a rather big mess. From what Karen had to say about it during her interrogation, he was more upset at the loss of life than he was at the failure of his team and himself to maintain their ninja hiding skills."

I knew it! I knew he couldn't have done that! Well, he did sort of do that, but still.

"He could have killed them all without anyone having even seen him or leaving any evidence behind at all, if it was his intention to do so. He had, less than a month previously, knocked out 500 trained soldiers simultaneously using and advanced area of attack version of chidori; one he developed. He also left them alive, although the attack he used could have killed him if he had applied just a bit more chakra. He chose to only knock them unconscious. The villagers there numbered less than that, and were mostly civilians. He did not choose to wipe them off the map; and he could have. He values human life."

Okay, now I had to ask something. I had to! "If he values human life, and he didn't want the Leaf destroyed, why did he believe Madara so easily and agree to attack us?"

"He did not believe easily, or even at first. He pretended to believe, and kept a close watch for an opportunity to betray Madara and free himself. There were a lot of things that worked to win him over, not the least of which was the fact his gripe on his sanity was slipping and Madara was helping to push him further down the slope. The final straw for both his sanity and his remaining Leaf loyalty was Danzo." Now he took a sip of his tea, which had long since cooled. His face revealed nothing, but he was who he was.

"Does he still want to attack the Leaf?"

"No. But, the Elders will never believe that."

"Then what does he want?"

"Honestly, I think he mostly wants to die. Given a chance, and some help to work out his fear, grief, and guilt, and to atone for the wrongs he did do, that will probably change. Right now, he does not believe he deserves the chance. The council sees all his anger and hate for them and for the village, but they do not see that is his shield, to hide his hate for himself."

Okay, brat. I knew this would help you! See, he had the answer all along, let the boy die, it is what he wants. How much bigger a sign can you get? Self-satisfaction and smugness oozed from the tailed beast.

I stood abruptly, knocking over the chair in my haste, and ran to the nearest bathroom. Inside, I promptly emptied my stomach of all the ramen, barbeque, and sweets I had eaten during the day, and passed out on the bathroom floor.