When I wake in the morning, I temporarily forget the circumstances. I see the room surrounding me, Asher beside me, and the luxuries everywhere. It all makes me think that I am still in the weeks preceding the Games, a time that seems so peaceful after only two days in the arena.
But, the feeling of safety and security is short-lived. I soon remember everything that threatens my life that I must return to tomorrow. The clock shows it to be just past before nine in the morning. The television flips itself on and I watch the symbol for a moment as the anthem plays. Then a camera shows Effie standing on the same balcony that the Reaping took place from; Haymitch stands behind her.
"Happy Hunger Games!" She says. At first, I think that this must be a replay of the day I was selected, but the word 'LIVE' at the bottom of the screen eliminates that possibility. I continue to watch.
"As you all know, six tributes have taken a leave from the final Hunger Games, meaning that six adult citizens will be selected from Capitol population."
I had completely forgotten about the new tributes. A pang of guilt comes over me as I consider the death sentence I have given someone by returning, another by forcing Elisabeth to do so. I know the citizens will forgive me after they are safe because I just put six new players in their Game, but I still cannot help but feel responsible for whoever is entered.
"As Head Escort, it is my pleasure to introduce to you Head Gamemaker Haymitch Abernathy to introduce the rules for these new tributes," she reads from a card.
Haymitch steps forward and tells us how these tributes will not have partners, and therefore cannot win with anyone else. They are also not allowed to kill each other until there are no more kids left. Supposedly, this is to allow them to finish watching the Games, but I guess it is to force them to watch children from their city die.
Effie steps up to the podium again. "These attributes were preselected, so no reaping is necessary. Please welcome your new tributes!" She begins to read off names I recognize as former leaders. The former vice president, two Gamemakers, the Chief Peacekeeper. I watch as Elisabeth's father walks to the stage and feel awful for her. The final tribute is called. "Madeline Snow." My mother.
Asher is still asleep as I run from the room, wearing only a pair of shorts. I am not sure where I am running. I find myself beating on Wyatt's door. When I come to my senses, I feel bad about doing this but when he opens the door, he takes me into a hug. He, too, is dressed only in sleeping shorts, making me worry that I have woken him. When he consoles me for my mother, though, I know he has watched the Reaping.
"James, it will be OK," he says soothingly.
"We can't both win," I say, tears running down my face, "And I can't protect Lissie, Ash, and her." He just stands there, letting me cry. My father never was like a father to me, so I am more than grateful to him for helping me.
"Let me go get you some food," he offers. "Then we can talk about this."
When he leaves, I go to the living room to wait for him, still crying. I sit on the sofa and try to manage my thoughts. Asher is my partners, and if he lives, I live. But I love Elisabeth and would gladly give my life for her. Then there is my mother, the woman who raised me and I had expected to go home to.
My thinking is disturbed when the elevator doors open. I stand to see who it is. In the door, a beautiful girl stands barefoot, wearing a blue lace nightgown. I run to her, tears pouring down both our faces. I embrace her in the glass elevator, holding her tight as we both mourn the sorrow of our parents. Lissie seems even more upset than I am.
Knowing that she has forgiven me makes the day a little bit easier. I spend the entire morning with Peeta, Katniss, and Asher discussing what the cameras will want to see. The mentors both tell him he must forgive Elisabeth and that our alliance needs to stay strong. Before lunch, I pull Peeta aside and ask what to do about Elisabeth.
"That is a hard question," he sighs. "When I was in the arena, I gave up everything for the girl I love. But you have Asher to think about and that's something I didn't have to cope with."
After lunch, it's up to the salon where a team prepares me again. Bath. Hair stars. Some new body paint on my face and hands. I go to Wyatt's room where he is waiting.
"Tuxedo again?" He asks, like I have a say.
We put a tux on me similar to the one from my parade outfit. In fact, I think it is that same one. In the mirror, I see my hair and makeup done the same way as well. The golden crown I had worn for my interview is placed atop my head, shining.
Effie meets me and Asher (who is also wearing his original suit and silver crown) in the living room, telling us that the night is to be a party here at the Training Center with more sponsors than have ever been at any event. She tells us a long story of her first party as a Hunger Games escort, where she accidently ate a bad muffin, and somehow that is to make us realize that posture is very important.
In the elevator, all seven members of our team head to the lobby. I notice that our outfits are strikingly similar. Peeta and Wyatt have clothes identical to mine, while the girls all wear jet black dresses and high-heeled shoes with the same painted stars, but only Asher and I wear crowns.
As if she is reading my thoughts, Sarah speaks, "We are hoping to reinforce the idea that District 12 will be the stars of these Games, just as they were last time. We want the sponsors to remember that."
"Are we going to light up?" Asher asks.
Katniss giggles slightly, more girlish than I have ever seen her. "Only in your eyes."
"I think James may light up the room, though," Effie remarks. When I give her a quizzical look, she explains, aggravated. "This elevator is glass. You can't just have a remarkable reunion with your lover, and assume nobody saw it."
"We need you to make sure the sponsors know you made up with Elisabeth," Peeta says. "They love the alliance."
The party is to be held in the Training Room, but the lobby is packed with people. I can tell that none are sponsors because the ones I do not recognize just stand around, not speaking. I assume they are the security for Sponsors, or perhaps government officials. This thought makes me wonder about Paylor. Will she have another request for me?
Another team with only four people approaches us. Lissie, Annie, Barnabas, and Lissie's stylist (a man) are present. I almost ask where Emily is, but remember the incident in the apartment of the arena. I have not properly grieved her death yet. I decide this thought must be pushed to the back of my mind.
"Hello, James," Lissie greets with an innocent smile.
"My sweet," I reply before taking her by the arm and heading for the elevator again. She looks lovely in an old-fashioned blue dress that puffs out at the hips. It is covered in green lace. I matching green ribbon in her hair reads her former partner's name. I remember Asher and that he has no partner. When Elisabeth extends an invitation for him to join us, he refuses and takes off with Sarah and Wyatt to speak with a few other stylists.
A short ride later, we are in the transformed Training Room. All equipment and stations have been removed to make room for numerous table and chairs which form a semicircle around a dance floor. At the far end of the room, avoxes serve food at long tables. It reminds me of the excellent parties my grandfather would throw. A band plays jazz-like music from the Gamemakers' balcony.
One thing that catches my eye is an enormous screen hanging on the wall above the food tables. It has 24 squares on it, each with a face and number inside. With just a quick glance, I notice these faces as the tributes. From my many years of watching the Hunger Games, I know that grey faces are dead and colored are still alive.
I notice that some of the colored faces have a large black "X" through them and notice that mine, Lissie's, and Asher's are among these. They are the tributes in the room.
Lissie is mesmerized by the screen. "12 dead," she whispers. "18 left."
I quickly pull her away to clear our minds. The first thing we do is dance to a slow song that is now playing. There is more kissing involved that dancing and the party guests love it. By the end of the song, a small clearing has formed around the two of us so that we may be seen.
Afterwards, we walk around. Talk to this sponsor. Thank another for his gift. Ask how this one is doing. Sample this one's favorite stew. Eat another's special ice cream flavor. All sponsors seem to want us, not the others. However, the only person I am looking for is my mother, but realize the adult tributes are not present.
At eleven in the evening, Annie finds us and takes my date, explaining she needs rest.
"Run away from the cornucopia," I whisper when she kisses me goodnight. "I'll follow."
I find Asher at a table of sponsors that seem particularly wealthy. All are painted metallic colors, a symbol of wealth before the new government took over. I join them for nearly half an hour, discussing talents and politics. All eight seem genuinely pleased with us, and three even pull out cellular phones to call in a donation to our sponsor fund. When a slow song begins, a drunken sponsor walks to our table and urges Asher and I to dance.
"Public displays of affection are not really for me," Asher says nervously.
"How 'bout for seven thousand dollars in the pot," the man slurs his words together. This offer convinces me.
` I take Asher to the dance floor and put my arms around his waist at arm's length. Once the crowd sees us, another clearing is formed. We are both smiling as the people laugh and cheer. I think I can even hear a few cell phone conversations about more donations. It is all going well, until the last note is hit.
Asher leans in toward me in a manner that threatens a kiss. In an innocent and goofy way, I lean in as well for a hug. Instantly, I decide I will not mention this to him, for both our sakes. But what was he trying to do? He was interested in Emily, right? He did not really want to kiss me. He just wanted a hug, right?
At one in the morning, I fall onto my bed, tuxedo and crown still on. When the head piece falls off, I throw it to the floor and strip the suit as well, leaving me completely naked. Why can't stylists just use undergarments? Asher is not here, so I guess he must be eating and get under the covers, on to the soft pillow, and fall asleep.
I am running toward the boy. That boy that threated my alliance. The boy I already killed. But he runs faster, toward a girl I recognize and love. She screams my name just as he stabs a sword straight into her stomach.
I wake in a cold sweat. The room is dark and the city loud. An extreme cloud of depression threatens me, but I use every bit of will I have to push it away. I remind myself the she is alive; she is only eight floors down.
"James?" Asher whispers from beside me. "Are you OK?"
"Fine," I say.
"You were kicking," he tells me. "And rolling all over the place."
"Just a dream, Ash. I'm fine."
There is a short pause. I use this time to turn off of my back onto my side to face him. He seems to be seating as well. His head and bare shoulders (the only things above the blanket) are wet.
"Am I naked?" I ask.
He lets out an extremely loud laugh, making me realize how ridiculous my question is. "Yeah," he says, still laughing. "But now worries, I'm not."
This makes me laugh along with him and I feel normal for a moment. Laughter is something so rare for tributes. But, it is short lived. Asher turns the conversation serious.
"You know, I don't expect you to pick me over her," he says, whispering again, "But if you've already made up your mind, I want to leave the alliance."
"Asher," I say, at a loss for words.
"Look, I know you love her." He touches the spot on my bare chest that is just above my hert and I notice his cast is gone. (Actually, it was off at the party.) "And you have to do what's in here."
I grab his arm that is extended to me. He obviously takes this as an act of violence, so I loosen my grip, but do not let go. "You are in there, too." This seems cheesy, but I am serious. I have become attached to Asher and am willing to lay down my life for him as well. But, true love will always win out and somehow I have to sacrifice myself for Lissie so that I do not have to decide between them.
In the morning, I wake not in the bed, but on a table in a white room. Asher is beside me, also naked, but asleep. Peeta stands next to us.
Wordlessly, he helps me back into me arena clothes, which have been cleaned and smell fresh. I wake Asher as Katniss enters and he also dresses. Not a word is said for nearly ten minutes as we just stand there. Then a voice announces the sixty second warning.
"Come back," Katniss whispers into my ear as I hug her goodbye.
When I hug Peeta, his speech is a little longer. "James, I know there are a lot of people in there that you love, but never forget about yourself."
When I stand next to my partner on our shining silver platform, our mentors hand us each an item. Asher receives a full backpack and I am given our sword. They tell us that Elisabeth has the other pack.
Just like last time, glass raises around us, taking us into the arena where there will be a total of twelve tributes. Eight of them want to kill me.
The light from the sun is blinding for a short second, but when I can see, my surroundings are not what I expected. We are not in the city circle, surrounded by building with a cornucopia in the center, but in a small circular arena. Stands full of people are all around us. There is deafening cheering. The ground is made of simple dirt. The cornucopia is small, maybe five feet tall, and holds only a dozen knives, nothing else. Other child tributes have supplies from their first few days in the arena, but the adults will fight for the knives.
I can see my mother. She also sees me. In her eyes, I see sorrow. I know that she will give up for me, that this will be the last time I see my mother living. I mouth the words I love you and she begins to cry, but I never loose eye contact until Haymitch speaks on a speaker.
"Welcome tributes," he booms as the crowd hushes. "To the Arena of Death! This area, an exact replica of the ancient runes found in the ancient city of Rome, has been designed for the entertainment of the rebels. There are twelve of you on the floor, but only six will leave. When the gong sounds, you will be free to move from your platforms and use all means necessary to attack your fellow tributes. When only six remain alive, the doors in the walls of this facility will be opened." I notice six huge wooden doors, at least ten feet tall, placed in the arena's walls. "When this happens, you may not kill until you leave the arena's walls. Happy Hunger Games!
A countdown begins from ten. My mind races as I try to figure out what to do. Who do I save. Who do I kill?
Dong!
"Help Lissie!" I scream to Asher and run for my mom, requiring me to run through the cornucopia's area. I am fast, so I reach the center before most. Even the one who beats me, a former Maker, avoids my path as I swing my sword. I judge my run to be fifty yards before I reach her. When I get there, I see another man has beaten me-Mr. Homes. Elisabeth's father has beaten me to her, carrying a knife that cannot be from the cornucopia, but I cannot determine where he got it.
He lunges it at my mom's stomach but she barely avoids it by hopping backward. I throw my entire wait against him, but he only stumbles slightly. He is at least six and a half feet tall and must weigh 250 pounds, all in muscle.
He slices his dagger at me, but I easily jump to my left. When I jump and slice the sword down at him, his maneuver to avoid me causes him to drop the knife. This gives me an advantage. I lunge again, but he manages to use his arm to throw mine off balance and the sword flies into the air. We stager in opposite directions and my weapon lands directly behind him, in front of my mother. She reaches for it, but he easily overpowers her and takes it. Effortlessly, without care, he stabs her straight through the heart.
My heart skips a beat. My mother is dead. Tears run down my face and I cannot move. The man I have been fighting runs toward me but I hold still. The sword's tip is inches from my face when he falls backward and the sword falls.
A knife, similar to the one he dropped, has come from behind me and landed straight in his heart. Although I am still slightly stunned, I see the doors opening. I feel Asher grab my arm and my feet running. I can see the walls leaving. I know I am in the woods.
When I finally rejoin reality I am in the woods, both Asher and Elisabeth trying to talk to me.
"Thanks for saving me," I say to Asher.
"James, that was her."