I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who is still reading and enjoying this story. I recently started my first real job and I'm still trying to juggle working full time and having a social life, so it's hard for me to find some time to write. But I promise that I'm going to finish this story. It is much too important to me to just quit it. So I hope you're still happy about the occasional updates and thanks again for your patience :)

Ezra

I hadn't seen her in weeks. I visited my grandma in the hospital again, but by then they had already left for Boston. When she was released I paid her uncommonly many visits, but it seemed like they either didn't drive down to New York at all or I just missed them.

A few weeks after she was back at home my grandmother decided that she was fit enough to gather the whole family around her again, so she guilt-tripped us into having lunch with her, because who could possibly know how long we would still have the chance to be with her. Normally I would have just accepted the invitation half-heartedly, this time I was beyond happy and excited, because a family event meant that I would most likely get to see Aria.

From time to time it occurred to me, that she was still dating my cousin and I felt bad for wanting to steal her from him. This wasn't me, I never wanted to harm people, let alone a good guy like Patrick. But I knew that Aria and I belonged together and that there must have been a reason why we ran into each other after all these years. I had to be selfish this one time.

My grandmother had invited us all to a fancy restaurant somewhere on the upper east side and I was one of the first guests to arrive there. I greeted my grandmother and sat down beside my brother and his wife, who - as opposed to me - had always been very punctual people. We chatted a little and he told me about his new job, but I was barely listening, constantly scanning the room for Aria.

And then the door swung open and she entered the restaurant, looking flawless as always. They walked right towards our table, but it seemed like ages to me. I tried to make eye contact with her, but she was looking everywhere but me. When we shook hands she gave me a quick smile, however it ended before I could do anything.
Everybody sat down and they took seats at the other end of the table. To say I was disappointed would have been an understatement. I was pretty aware that she wouldn't just ride into the sunset with me, but in my mind she had also been thinking about me and about our kiss all the time.

Aperitifs arrived and my grandmother stood up to say something.

"As you all know I have been in the hospital a few weeks ago and it's only thanks to a great amount of good luck that we're sitting here together today. You may have realized that life is short – I know I did. We all know we have to die someday, but in our hearts we feel like we're immortal. So I once again reminded myself to live every day to the fullest and I am happy that I can spend this day with the people I love. So let's enjoy this day, it may as well be the last time we're all together!"

Grandma had always had a thing for theatrical speeches. We all raised our glasses and toasted her. We started chatting again, when suddenly Patrick got up.

"Since this seems to be a good time for announcements, I have something to say, too." He said and everyone got quiet again.

"Aria and I are getting married!"

I sat at the table in shock. People kept congratulating Patrick and Aria, hugging them and gushing over her ring, which she had apparently worn the entire time. I still couldn't believe it. Things weren't going according to plan at all.

"Congratulations", I mumbled and patted Patrick's shoulder, because it would look odd if I was the only one who ignored what he had just announced. I shook Aria's hand, but once again she avoided my look. At least now I knew why.

Everyone was sitting down again and some soup was served, but I couldn't eat more than a few spoons. I felt sick to my stomach.

After we had finished the soup, or at least the others did, I got up and went to the restroom. After a few minutes of pacing up and down and sprinkling water to my face over and over again, I realized that I had to get back eventually and left the room, rushing down the hallway, nearly crashing into someone else. I came to a sudden stop and my eyes widened when I realized who it was.

"So I guess congratulations are in order", I said.

"Thank you", Aria answered once again avoiding eye contact.

"I hope he makes you happy", was the only thing I could think of, before I turned away and headed towards the exit. Right before I reached the door, I changed my mind and turned around again.

"How come you didn't tell him about us?"

Now she looked at me with her big hazel eyes, but she didn't say anything.

"If I remember right, honesty was the one thing you valued most in a relationship… so why didn't you tell him?"

"Look, it's not that easy…" she finally said.

"How is it not easy?" I asked enraged.

"I didn't tell anyone about us ever!" she spat out, "When you left I felt terrible, but after a while remembering the time I had spent with you didn't hurt so much anymore. It slowly turned into a happy memory. A memory I cherished a lot. But you were my teacher for heaven's sake! The reason why I didn't tell people is because I didn't want anyone to ruin it. You were my first big love and I wouldn't allow anyone to turn that into something ugly!"

Now I was the one who didn't know what to say. I had never thought about this explanation.

"And then we ran into each other at the birthday party and everything went so fast", she continued, "What was I supposed to do? Tell Patrick 'Those mini quiches are amazing and by the way I dated your cousin while he was my teacher'?"

She sighed, "You're right, I value honesty above everything else and I hate myself for being in this situation. And I know that I should have told him. I just don't know how."

We looked at each other without saying anything. I felt miserable.

"What about us?" I whispered over the silence.

"Us? Ezra, there is no 'us'."

"What about the kiss?"

"YOU kissed ME!", she exclaimed.

"You certainly didn't fight it!"

"You caught me off guard. This doesn't mean that it meant something to me! We didn't work out all these years ago, maybe there's a reason why."

It felt as if someone stabbed a knife right into my heart. I looked her in the eye and realized that it was too late.