Zim's smiling face was the last thing I saw before he shut down communications. I'd watch the replay of events on the news later. For now, I had to clean myself up and remove any evidence of tampering. Or at least any evidence that would point to ME being the one doing the tampering. As I began sweeping up broken glass and bits of wire, I thought back to Ship-me's response. Haha... he sure sounded rattled. After Zim had left us alone to talk before, I had tried to appeal to our familiarity. That hadn't gone so well.

"Listen, Ship-me. I know the old Dib would never go against humanity. And since all your memories are from old me, I can understand your reluctance to do what I'm asking now. But I'm still me, aren't I? And you're me, so trust me when I say that humanity isn't worth saving."

Ship-me shifted restlessly, obviously unconvinced. "I STILL say you could be some evil clone Zim made to try to trick me into helping him! If you're really me then... then tell me something that only I know about! Something Zim couldn't have programmed you to know!"

"Okay, that's a reasonable request..." I tried to think far back enough that it would be a memory from before Zim and I met. "Hmm... oh, how about this one? Remember when me and Gaz were still in kindergarten? Gaz was so small back then. I felt protective of her. 'You're a big brother now,' Dad had said. 'You have to watch out for her.'

"One day we were walking to school and a raindrop landed on my cheek. It was one of those late spring storms that only last a short time, but man, they are real gully washers! Gaz was oblivious, of course, too focused on the pixelated monsters blowing up on her screen. I took her hand and said, "Lets run!"

"As I tugged her behind me, she seemed to suddenly become aware of the surroundings. The cold rain was starting to soak down into the skin underneath her clothes. She didn't like it, and started sniffling like she was going to cry."

Ship-me seemed uncomfortable. This wasn't an easy memory to bear. A lot had changed between Gaz and me since then. She hasn't been my 'cute little sister' for a really long time. I wondered briefly when our relationship stopped being that way. When had we drifted so far apart?

"Remember what I told her?" I continued the story, swallowing the lump in my throat. "I had to yell to be heard over the storm. I said, 'Look up!'

"Gaz hesitated, but she did it and stated the obvious '... It's raining.'

"'Yeah,' I said, 'Isn't it great?'

"Gaz looked puzzled, but she wasn't going to cry anymore. 'Look up!' I said again. And she looked up.

"The rain was in our faces, running down our backs and plastering our hair to our shoulders. It really was great. Gaz smiled. When we got to the school, we were drenched. Our clothes were clinging to us, almost transparent. Our shoes sloshed with each step. Water was dripping off the ends of our noses and out of our hair. And we were laughing. I held onto her hand. We were clammy and cold... but we were laughing."

The ship and I were quiet for a while. It was a strange feeling... the memory was like a warm cocoon of happiness wrapped around my brain. It was hard to leave that and face the current reality. Ship-me must have been thinking the same thing.

"How..." it began. "With these memories... how can you still say humanity's not worth saving?"

"Things are different now," I replied, sticking my hands in my trench coat pockets. "You grow up and discover that some things you thought were beautiful turn out to be ugly. Truths turn out to be lies... there's no place for us here."

"Then we MAKE a place for us here!" The ship stood up on his claw tips and swung his wires angrily. "Isn't that what we've been trying to do all this time? To discover the truth, to fight evil, and be heroes! Even if you've given up on that..." Ship's monitors darkened a bit as he said that, "... even if you've given up, for whatever reason, that's still doesn't justify what you're doing now!"

Sheesh... I thought. Old me sure is persistent.

"What happened, human-me?" the ship asked. "Why are you doing this? Something's happened, right? Why don't you tell me? Maybe I could help! Come on, whatever it is, it can't be so bad that this is the only way to handle it!"

Why are you doing this? echoed a memory in my head. The memory brought with it an image of Zim on the floor of the school hallway, a mixture of fear and anger in his eyes. I'd remembered thinking he was beautiful... this gave me an idea.

I took a hand out of my pocket and ran it over my hair, sighing defeatedly. "You got me, Ship. I guess it really was useless trying to hide anything from myself."

Ship-me bounced excitedly, "Yeah! We're a team! Come on, buddy, spill it! We'll get through this together! Just Dib and Dib! We don't need Zim!"

I gave Ship-me my best woeful look. "That's where you're wrong, Ship... maybe you don't need Zim, but I..."

Ship-me stopped in mid-bounce. "You what?"

"It's rather embarassing to admit," I began pacing a slow circle around it. "How do I put this? I mean, I could be totally misunderstanding my own reactions, but all signs seem to point to the same conclusion."

"Huh?" Ship said, as he spun in a circle to keep me in sight. "Misunderstand what? Point to what? What are you talking about?"

"I think... I think I might be..." I let my voice trail off.

"Cursed?" Ship-me suggested. "Hexed? Infected?"

"...In love."

"WHAT? Really?!" Ship was excited again. "Since when?! With who?! Is she pretty? Do I know her? It's Gretchen, isn't it? She's lost the braces, gotten a personality, and works out now, right? Oh, wait, maybe it's that cute blond girl, Rehima? The one that we met that summer when we visited our cousin's house that actually turned out to be a werewolf? She finally forgave you for-"

"It's not Gretchen," I stopped pacing. "It's not Rehima. In fact, it's not even a girl."

"Huh?" Ship-me lifted his claw limbs in surprise. "I'm gay?! I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that, but ME?! Me? Seriously...? It's because we drank that Peruvian tap water, isn't it? The mayor tried to warn us, but we-"

"There's more," I interrupted. "You still don't know who's on the receiving end of this one-sided crush."

Ship tapped his dome pensively with a claw arm. "Hmm... is it someone I know?"

"Yup."

Ship-me contemplated a while. It then shuddered and moaned piteously. "UGH! All the guys I know are creepy, sadistic, or both! Please tell me it's not... Keef?"

I shook my head, "Not Keef."

"Torque Smacky?"

"Nope."

"Mr. Dwicky?"

"Nuh-uh."

"But then that only leaves..." Ship-me stopped in mid-thought and turned to face me. "You're joking. It can't be... it's not... Zim?"

"Hard to believe, isn't it?" I looked away in embarassment. "Somewhere along the way, that thin line between love and hate was crossed. But he doesn't know yet. At least, I don't think he does. He tends to be a bit dense." I finally faced him. "I think I could make him fall for me, if I tried, but for now, it's one-sided. Here's where you and I could make a deal." I leaned in towards the ship. "If you help me out, I promise that I'll leave quietly. We'll start a new life in a new galaxy somewhere, and never have to see or hear from him again."

"I don't believe it!" Ship-me slammed down a claw-limb in protest. "You're making this up! You're just saying stuff you KNOW goes too far just to get me to go along with whatever you say! You know I'd rather die than be Zim's slave! And you know that's what you'd be, a slave! Irkens can't love! Have you forgotten how many times he's tried to kill you? How he ditched you in that nightmare world? How he turned you into a hideous mooing cyborg boy when he was swapping out everyone's organs? Come on, human-me, this is just too stupid!"

No good, huh? Well, knowing myself like I do, there's one last ditch effort I could try.

"Hehe... I see. So you're gonna deny it, too?" I asked, "That you've been spying on us?"

The ship took a step back, surprised. "AH! You saw me?!"

"It's actually harder not to notice you," I grinned cheekily. I couldn't believe my bluff worked. "So then, you must've seen how Zim and I act towards each other. Pretty friendly, right? And that reaction I get when I pet his antennae..."

The ship began to tremble a little, it's claw limbs making tiny scratch marks where it stood. "No, no, NO! This is insane! Look, let's talk about this, okay? You... you're probably confused or... or something. It can't be that you... not with him of all people! And he's not even people!"

"So you'll help me?" I asked.

"I'm TRYING!"

"You know what I mean," I said, turning to walk out the door. "If you don't, then I have no choice but to go out there right now where Zim is waiting and -"

"STOP!" Ship-me jump-landed in front of me, blocking my path with it's entire being. "I... I believe you, okay? So just... just stop... for a second. I need time to think. I'll help you, but... I won't anybody. And it's just until I figure something else out. Deal?"

He stuck out one of his claw limbs towards me in a handshake gesture. I shook it. "Deal."