SQUUEEEEE so if you've seen my instagram you may have seen my post, 999 AMERICAN VIEWS! So I'm really happy with that. I love you I love you I love you I love you! And p.s, when I'm writing this I noticed it was houseoanubis_sibuna_ birthday. It may be posted after her b-day but wish you an awesome day. Although it's nearly over in England. On with the story.

Jaspers Pov

After I signed the guest book Fabian grabbed my arm and dragged me into the lounge and we sat on the couch.

"So, what's been on your mind sport?"

"Well jasper. You've had some experience with women, right?"

"Errmm, I'm not sure your parents will be happy me answering that truthfully to you and I'm worried this is going to go somewhere I'm not comfortable talking to you about."

"No not like that jasper." He suddenly looked all red faced and embarrassed. "No I mean, you've had girlfriends before. You know what it's like to be in a relationship. Suddenly I noticed he was whispering and staring at the laundry room door where we saw Trudy go in. I had a feeling he didn't want her to hear some of this.

"Yeah, I've had girlfriends before. And people I've really liked." As I said this I realised I had begun to stare at the laundry room. I suddenly moved my head quickly to face him again. "So what's your problem then?"

"Well, have you ever been out with one girl, but liked another, but not want to hurt either of them. What would you do?" I could see desperation in his eyes. This problem was obviously big. I know Fabian he's always happy.

"Okay Fabian, I've never had an experience like this but I need you to tell me the full truth if I can help in any way."

"Okay well, Nina didn't come back this term for a long reason I can't explain to you, but then after a few weeks joy asked me out. I didn't want to reject her because I love her, but just not in that way. She's a best friend and I couldn't hurt her. But literally after I said yes, Nina came back. I still love Nina and have no clued what to do. I can't hurt either and I need help."

"Damn, you got it bad."

"Jasper! I tell you all that and you mock me. And seriously. Have you never had a problem about a girl but there's too much risk of hurting someone?" with that I was silent. Last year with Trudy. They had both felt a connection that was obvious. But with Rufus and the entire last thing he wanted to do was put her at risk.

"Well Fabian, the longer you stay with joy, the more you lead her on. Get her excited about something that won't happen. Tell her the truth before Tell her the truth before you dig up a deeper hole than you started with." Jesus I can't even sort out my own love-life and I'm trying to help others.

"You okay jasper, you look a bit distant. Now it's my turn to ask what's on your mind."

"Oh not much. Grown up stuff."

"Okay now I'm worried I'm going to end up in a conversation my parents won't want me in."

"Don't worry Fabian don't worry about that. That isn't what's on my mind. Now you need to go talk to joy. I have to go do something." And with that he stood up and walked off. I waited till he was out of eye sight and ear shot till I stood up and walked through the kitchen and to the laundry room.

"Hey Trudy," I said quite nervously as I stepped into the laundry room at a slow page. She was rummaging through draws vigorously looking for things.

"Oh jasper," she sounder rather nervous in my presence. "Where's Fabian gone?" Something told me that she didn't really want to know about Fabian at this precise moment, but I answered her question none the less.

"He's just gone upstairs."

"Oh, so will you be going now?"

"Actually, I wanted to come talk to you. If that's alright." She hadn't once turned around from the cuboards to look me in the eye.

"Why would you want to talk to me?" she asked as if she was trying to act shocked.

"Okay you know why I would want to talk to you." At this she actually turned around from the cupboards and walked over to me.

"Okay jasper, I know what happened last term was wired, but it's all water under a bridge. Were both mature adults. We can handle this."

"Yes but Trudy, what if I saw it more than that."

"Well, I shouldn't have kissed you. End of." (That's right I added a secrete kiss: O oh dun dun duuhhhh!)

"But Trudy. I didn't want to push you off. There was a reason."

"Listen Jasper. It was a stupid mistake. You were leaving; I was going to miss you. I got caught up in the moment. I'm sorry but can we just leave it at that?" I had to give up.

"Sure Trudy. If it's what you want." And with that I got up and left; signed out of the guest book and walked to my new house. The school had accommodated me with one close to the gate house. But I needed to think of something to convince Trudy that it was a mistake pushing her of. But how?

Flashback jaspers last day working in the library

After everyone left it was just me and Trudy left to pack up the artefacts. After the schools one year allowance for them, they had to go back to the museums. Suddenly I saw Trudy walk up to me.

"So, now the libraries being closed, you've got to find a new job then." She sounded quite sad when she spoke whilst picking up the cowbell next to me. "Oh well. You'll always have memories." At this I let out a quiet laugh referring to the mass commotion over the cowbell theft.

"Well some people are hard to forget." I said looking her in the eyes. "And Fabians here so if I ever want an excuse to visit." we were both laughing at each other's jokes like a pair of teenage students.

"Well it would be lovely for you to visit. I know I'll miss you loads." Suddenly I could see her lean in. My heart was racing. As her lips met mine I knew I had to kiss back. I had felt such an amazing feeling when I was with her. But suddenly reality hit me like a ton of bricks. I know they said Rufus was dead, but what if he comes back. He's shifty. I know Trudy was kidnapped by him before. I don't want him getting revenge on me through her. I suddenly reached my hands out to her shoulders and lightly pushed her of me.

"I'm sorry Trudy. I just can't." And with that I returned to work like normal trying to avoid the heavy dull atmosphere surrounding us in awkward silence.