It's Always Been You
Chapter 10: Hermione
"I've been meaning to tell you, I've got this feeling that won't subside. I look at you and I fantasize..." Hungry Eyes, Eric Carmen
Telling Sirius, James and Remus about my real last name was going to make things difficult. This was going to change the future so much. Sirius and Remus would know that it was me who went back in time and they would probably never look at me the same again. If Sirius knew that he had gone on a date in his seventh year with his godson's best friend he would probably be ashamed of himself, or never talk to me again. I had to stop this from happening, but I just couldn't stop Sirius from having feelings for me. I didn't even know if he did have feelings for me, but why would he take me on a date if he didn't? I knew I had to stop myself from falling for him. If I wasn't already in too deep. I couldn't just leave the map with my real name on it, what if it fell into the wrong hands? What if Pettigrew had already taken a glimpse and noticed the name change? I couldn't take any chances. I hoped and prayed to any higher power to not let things go downhill, just because of my last name.
I knew Sirius was following me; I could hear his footsteps down the corridor. I left the third floor corridor quickly. I stepped onto the moving staircase seconds before it changed its route. I didn't know where the staircase was moving to, but at that moment I just wanted to be left alone to think of what was going to happen with me. Sirius was left at the bottom of the staircase waiting for one to move in front of him. I stepped forward, looking around to see where the stairs had left me. I was on the fourth floor near Professor Binns' office. I walked down the corridor to look for another set of stairs to take me to the library.
"Hermione!" Sirius called my name from behind me. I stepped into the study room, trying to avoid him. The study room was attached to the restricted section, which would take me down to the library. No one ever went to the restricted section, well not often. I sat down in the chair in the study room, debating if I should go through the restricted section, but people would think I was up to something if I had walked out from there. I didn't even have Dumbledore's note with me as an excuse. I quietly sat down in the corner of the room, my back facing the door. I put my head down on the large oak table and went over everything that had happened to me lately.
I remembered the dream I had had a couple nights ago, it repeated itself in my head. The dream was so vivid, it must've meant something. Maybe if I went to the divination Professor - no, divination was completely the opposite of whatever Professor Trelawney had said to us in the third year. 'The art of divination is particularly refined, one must have the sight and compassion to see what future may bring us.' I mocked professor Trelawney's voice in my head; I stuck my tongue out, disgusted. Divination was no good, it taught you nothing. I looked up to the window.
I felt warm hands slide onto my shoulders. My body jolted in surprise. I knew it was Sirius, but I couldn't get the idea of the Slytherins out of my head. I shouldn't have been afraid of those Slytherins; I had faced much worse things in my life than those cruel toads.
"Why are you running away from me?" Sirius chuckled. He sat down next to me in the vacant study room. I looked at him trying to hide the expression I had had on earlier. "You feeling alright?" he looked at me curiously.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I waved my hand at him. He was still studying me. I felt his eyes roaming around my body. "Sirius, you don't have to worry about me." I motioned him to leave me alone. He pulled his eyes away from me to look out the window. I put my head down on the desk; Sirius wasn't going to leave. I felt a little relieved that he didn't though. I didn't want to be alone, actually. Sirius noticed me put my head down; he could tell that there was something going on. He rubbed my back soothingly. The fact that I was trying my hardest not to fall in love or have some sort of infatuation with him wasn't helping, He kissed my forehead softly and reached for my hand. I looked up at him, wondering what he was going to do. Sirius got up from the chair and pulled me up onto my feet. He held my hand gently, as if I were a fragile china doll. I looked at him for awhile. I pushed the picture of Sirius and I kissing passionately out of my head – I wasn't allowed to think like this. Maybe I should tell him that these kisses he was giving me weren't really the friend-type kiss. I'm too selfish for this; I didn't want him to stop giving me these harmless kisses. I looked away from him quickly, and he pulled me out of the study room to the nearest staircase.
We walked up to the seventh floor together till we reached the corridor that led to the Gryffindor common room.
"Dolor Aperta."
The portrait of the Fat Lady swung open and we walked into the common room. Our next class was in about ten minutes.
I let go of Sirius' hand and went to look for my bag, which I had dropped near the loveseat where I had stolen the Marauders Map from Remus. I picked it up from the floor and sat down next to Lily, who had occupied the seat after Remus and I had left it. Lily stared down at her book; she didn't seem herself since Snape had called her the 'M' word, something that had been said to me multiple times during my first few years at Hogwarts. I could tell that Lily really missed her friend, but she seemed like she never wanted to see him again, either.
"How are you feeling?" I asked her.
She put her book down and looked at me, forcing a smile. "I'm fine, I guess. I don't really know." She looked around, trying to not cry. She must have really liked Severus. I felt contrite for her situation. It was only a matter of time before she'd say yes to James, then she wouldn't feel as bad as she did then. Remus walked over to us.
"You two wanna go to class?" Remus asked coolly. Lily nodded at him and we were off to class.
All we Gryffindors had walked to Defence Against the Dark Arts together. DADA had turned out to be a very interesting class. I remember Harry telling me that Voldemort had cursed the job when Dumbledore refused to give it to him. Apparently, since the 70's the DADA teacher would only last a year, and a new one would come in each year. A whole lot of the students seemed to like Professor Maifrini though; she was really nice and laid-back. This Professor was a lot younger than the other teachers at Hogwarts. She had dark hair that was usually twisted into a bun on the top of her head. She had loose tendrils falling from the sides of her head, framing her heart-shaped face nicely. The witch usually wore her witch's hat lopsided and robes that were the colors of the house she was once in: Ravenclaw.
On our first day of Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor Maifrini had told us a lot about herself. It had only come to that point because a lot of the fifth and sixths year that she had taught the days before us had questioned if she was even good enough for the job. Maifrini had told us that she was an Italian traveler who worked for the Italian Ministry of Magic, in the auror department. Then the question 'if you're Italian, then how come you're teaching at Hogwarts?' had come up. She had answered this by saying that she had come here as a young girl, and that her parents had moved to a Muggle town in Ireland. She still had a thick Italian accent because her parents spoke to her in her native tongue. But she had learned the English language fluently. She had also told us that she was well qualified for the job, since she had come face-to-face with a lot of dangerous wizards and experienced dangerous events.
Lily and James were on friendly terms now. Lily actually sat with James during DADA. His face was priceless; it was like he had seen the sun for the first time. Everyone could tell he was trying not to mess anything up, as he was quiet most of the class. He also used 'Lily' instead of 'Evans' whenever he addressed her. James was caught staring at Lily and Professor Maifrini called him out on it. Maifrini ended up moving James away from Lily, despite his lengthy protest.
Everyone was paired up with someone of the opposite house. Sirius was paired up with Lucius Malfoy. He was completely disgusted and kept on asking Merlin why he was always paired with him. James was paired with Severus, and James knew whatever the assignment was he would have fun tormenting Snape. Basically girls were paired with girls and boys paired with boys, except for Marlene, who was paired up with Bastian Wincent. I walked over to my partner, a snobby-looking but pretty girl. She went by the name Adorabella Valentine. You could tell just by looking at her that she thought highly of herself, and didn't care much for anyone else. I sat next to her, trying to ignore her presence.
"Alright then, you are all probably wondering why I have you paired this way."
A couple of Slytherins nodded, annoyed at the pairings. "Well, since there have been many unfortunate events lately Professor Dumbledore has asked me to postpone the seventh year curriculum, and we will continue what we have started after the Christmas holidays." The dark-haired woman paced from behind her desk to the front. "Since He-Who-Must-Not Be-Named is on-"
I cut the Professor off. "Professor, that is not his name," I said nonchalantly. I received a lot of glares from the Slytherins. "Fear of the name increases fear of the thing itself." Professor Maifrini smiled at me and started over again.
"Alright, Ms. Donnelle. Since Lord Voldemort is on the rise I think that it only appropriate that I as your teacher educate you to have the useful, everyday knowledge of protecting yourselves. Professor Dumbledore and I have gone through new lesson plans that will teach you all how to defend yourselves in combat. I will teach everyone of you defensive and offensive spells and we will practice them 'till they are perfected. I will not have any student of mine be killed or even maimed." Professor Maifrini paused and looked carefully at us. "Outside these walls is a war," a couple of Slytherins whined at the obvious fact. "And many of you might fall, but only if you do not accept the information I will hand down to you."
Professor Maifrini paced up and down the aisle that had once separated the Gryffindor's from the Slytherin's. Professor Maifrini smiled sweetly. She was at the back of the room, staring ahead. A couple of whispers broke out then. Professor Maifrini silenced them by continuing her speech. "This is what will be done." She raised her right hand up elegantly and the chalk on the small chalk board began to dance across it, scrawling out some words. "I have not named this type of battle but maybe you students might find a name for it." Sirius snickered next to me.
"She's going to make us duel?" Mary whispered, a little worried.
"This is going to be so much fun!" Frank Longbottom muttered excitedly at Remus, who was sitting in front of him.
"Every other class we will practice skills by dueling each other. The days when we are not dueling, we will be learning new spells that you will get to try out on the next dueling day." Professor Maifrini strode to the front of the room and a serious expression reached her face again. "But hear me: I will not tolerate foolish behaviour and reckless feuds over houses. This will only land you a ticket to detention." James looked at Sirius with some mischievous look in his eyes, which only meant that they were going to cause some trouble.
"On a lighter note, this will also leave you with less homework, but you must still bring some parchment and a quill to every class," she spoke blissfully. "Anyway, today I just want to see what you all know from your previous schooling. Everyone stand and move the desks and chairs along the walls. You will be dueling your partner." Professor Maifrini walked over to the empty desks and levitated them over to the wall. The whole classroom area was now clear and a large space was left for us to duel in. Sirius walked over to me, leaving his partner alone, not that he cared.
Sirius put his face into my hair and whispered, "Sweet revenge." He smirked and crossed his arms across his chest. My eyes widened at the tone of his voice. He was about to walk over to Lucius, before I got hold of his wrist and tugged him in.
"Sirius, what are you doing?" I whispered harshly. He grinned at me crookedly, his smile still attractive as ever. I was hoping he wouldn't smile at me like that. It made my stomach do somersaults. I didn't know if I should continue talking, but I didn't anyway. I couldn't look at Sirius without feeling something deep down inside me. I looked away quickly, seeing what other people were doing. Sirius placed a kiss on my hair and walked off to the other side of the room.
Professor Maifrini motioned everyone to the very front of the room. "Alright, students, I'll call you up to duel and when your opponent's wand is in your hand, it is done. You will not continue. After that you can stand in the back." She rolled the parchment out. "Miss Marlene McKinnon and Mister Bastien Wincent please come up to the front." Marlene strode over to the center of the room, looking quite confident of herself. Wincent didn't look any less confident either.
"Remember, I will not tolerate foolish behavior and no Unforgivables. Wands at the ready."
Marlene smirked at her opponent and stepped back.
"1, 2, 3"
"Petrificus Totalus!" Wincent spoke clearly, waving his wand at Marlene.
"Protego!" Marlene shouted, ducking away from the spell. Wincent's spell flew back at him, sending him straight at the wall and completely petrified. "Accio Wincent's Wand!" The wand flew through the air and landed in Marlene's hand.
"Well, that was fast." Peter almost laughed.
"No contest!" James laughed at the petrified boy. Professor Maifrini walked over to Wincent and lifted the spell off him.
"Miss McKinnon, please return his wand" Marlene chucked it at him. This only led the Gryffindors to continue laughing. Professor Maifrini quickly wrote something down on her parchment. "Miss Alice Lewin and Miss Athenodora Castian, come up please."
Alice skipped over to the front of the room to meet her opponent. Alice bowed at the Slytherin girl, but all she did was nod her head.
"Wands at the ready."
"Flipendo!" The Slytherin girl whipped her wand at Alice. Alice quickly got out of the way avoiding the jinx.
"Stupefy!" Alice waved her wand in Athenodora's direction. The Slytherin was thrown at the desks that lined the walls. She quickly got up trying to look as unfazed as possible.
"Immobulus!" The girl screeched, sounding furious. Alice quickly pulled her wand around her and the spell hit her invisible shield.
"Expelliarmus!" Alice fiercely swung her wand, and soon Athenodora's wand was on the floor next to Alice and the Slytherin girl on the floor on her rear-end. Alice tried to hold back a laugh as she looked at the dumbfounded girl.
"Gryffindor two, Slytherin zero!" James shouted. Remus and Peter laughed loudly.
"Gryffindor in the lead!" Sirius added waggishly.
"Excellent, Miss Alice, return Miss Castian's wand." Alice politely gave back the wand and stepped toward the back, where Marlene stood.
"Mister Remus Lupin and Mister Septimus Savill."
Savill pranced over to the center and smirked. He didn't exactly prance but he was the type of guy who would. Remus bowed respectfully and moved back. "Wands at the ready," Professor Maifrini sung.
"Stupefy!" Remus hurled the spell, aiming at Savill's head. Septimus stepped out of the way and cast the Incarcerous curse at Remus.
"Protego!" The wolfish boy set his shield around him and watched the boy struggle in the ropes he was tied up with. Remus laughed at him, and sent him an "Impedimenta". He moved his wand around, making Savill, who was still tied up, jerk in the air, bouncing at Remus' command. Savill struggled to reach his wand, which was stuck to his leg by the tight ropes. Professor Maifrini looked at Remus sternly. When Remus noticed the look on the Professor's face he quickly put Savill down, grabbed his wand and undid the ropes. Maifrini wrote some more words down on her parchment and continued with the rest.
The duels concluded with only one person being sent to the hospital wing with a nasty stinging hex. Sirius and James claimed that Gryffindor had won by over seven to five. They were the most ecstatic from the duels that would occur in the next classes. Dumbledore must be trying to gather new members for the order. This must be how everything started. Dumbledore was testing and preparing.
I walked out of the classroom and waited for the others to catch up. Sirius still had that smug look on his face. He had beaten Lucius so quickly, it had made everyone's head spin. He looked too proud of himself. He had only meant it to be revenge, but revenge is never the answer to anything. The Gryffindors and I walked up to the Gryffindor tower to relax before dinner. The group had claimed a spot near the fire that was surrounded by plush armchairs and a loveseat couch. Sirius sat down next to me on the loveseat while everyone else accommodated themselves. Marlene was giving me mean glares. I don't know what I ever did to her, but I could tell she didn't like me. The conversation had started on the Quidditch tryouts that were this weekend and everyone was excited to see who would make James' cut to the team.
"I'm a shoe-in for the team!" Sirius stated happily.
"Padfoot, everyone's trying out again. No one is completely certain of a spot," Remus told him.
"Yeah, Paddy! If you talk like that I might even reconsider you even trying out." James had turned his Quidditch-game mood on. Sirius laughed and slung an arm around my shoulder. I stiffened at his touch and he noticed me shift in my seat. I got up from the chair, surprising Sirius with my movement. He didn't say anything in return. I walked across the large circle and I stood in front of James, who sat sluggishly in his armchair.
"Uh, James, can I talk to you for a bit?" I asked him, gingerly walking behind his chair. He stood up and followed me away from the group.
"So what's up, chick?" James asked curiously as he sat at the end of the short table. He adjusted his glasses on his face, the way Harry used to.
"I know you like Lily." He smiled at the fact that all of Hogwarts knew. "And I know one day you'll be together." He smiled genuinely. It took a lot to get that kind of smile out of James Potter and it had happened twice today, the first time being when Lily had acknowledged him in DADA. "I know that Lily likes you too, but she's in denial right now about everything, because of what Snape called her." James scowled at the sound of Snape's name. "You should try to be her friend, let her get close to you." He listened attentively as if I were telling him the meaning of life. He shifted his position on the table to look over to Lily, who was looking down at her book while sitting in a large circle of seventh years.
"You better not tell anyone about this, chick," James started. "You've only gotten here this year, but if you were here longer you would have thought I was the worse for her. Well, that's what everyone else thinks. Everyone wants her and Remus to get together." He spoke sadly. "'Mione I don't like her." He stared at me attentively widening his eyes. "I love her. I'm in love with her".
"I get it James. You don't want me to tell anyone about this." I looked back to the circle. Sirius had kicked his legs up on to the sofa and lounged back lazily. "You should try harder. She'll come around. Trust me, and... Um, don't yell at her when you're trying to ask her out. You sound like a madman, honestly."
He pushed my shoulder playfully. "Thanks 'Mione!" He smiled again and pulled me in for a friendly hug, then went back to his seat.
Time to talk to Lily about James, now.
A/N: Hiya! Here's chapter 10! I hope it wasn't boring to anyone. I just wanted to remind everyone that this story will go on! No matter how long it takes me to update. I've recently just lost a Beta. She is to busy to attend to this story since she has exams coming.
I wish her some luck!
Since I live in Canada school will be starting to soon. So, it'll make posting a little harder. But I'll write whenever I can.
But for now! Here's this chapter! Enjoy! Thanks for the Reviews also!
-Rauja
(P.S. I might change my user nameon here. Not completely sure.)