A/N: Thanks so much for the kind feedback on this story so far! I'm really enjoying writing it. I hope you like this chapter, and thank you so much for reading! :)

Derek sat at the hotel bar. "Double scotch, single malt" he told the bartender, and weakly smiled his thanks when the man brought him his drink.

"You know," the bartender began, "you look like you're in the mood to be alone with your thoughts."

Derek nodded. "I am."

"This might not be the place for you, then," the bartender told him.

"Anywhere with alcohol is the place for me," Derek responded glumly.

The bartender chuckled. "I just meant tonight's karaoke night and, well, nothing ruins a good drinking session like a couple of off-key renditions of 'Sweet Caroline.'"

Derek smiled. "I think I'll be okay."

"Suit yourself," the bartender grinned. "Let me know if you need anything."

Derek nodded and went back to his drinking, only dimly aware of the karaoke singing that was taking place around him. A young couple had just made their way to the microphone, and Derek watched them with mild interest. They looked pretty into each other. I give their relationship another six months, tops, Derek thought to himself dryly, as he turned his attention back to his scotch.

I was tired of my lady;
We'd been together too long.
Like a worn-out recording
Of a favorite song.

Derek looked up from his scotch, mildly amused that several of the people sitting around him were singing along with the couple. Man, he hated the young couple continued to sing, Derek looked around and realized that, now, practically everyone in the bar was singing along with them. In fact, he was pretty sure that he was the only one not singing – but he was used to that. And then the chorus hit him like a ton of bricks – a loud, somewhat melodious ton of bricks.

If you like piña coladas
And getting caught in the rain,
If you're not into yoga
If you have half a brain,
If you like making love at midnight
In the dunes of the cape,
Then I'm the love that you've looked for
Write to me and escape.

"Shit," he swore. "I didn't listen to her." He hadn't listened to Addison – just got mad and shut down…just like New York…just like Seattle. Even though he was pretty sure that there was nothing she could say that would make him feel better, he hadn't listened to her. And he owed her that, if nothing else. He signaled to the bartender so he could pay for his drink, and quickly made his way out of the bar, ignoring the dirty looks that he was receiving for leaving in the middle of the song. He didn't have time to care about karaoke etiquette right now; he had to talk to Addison.

He was surprised to find the front door to her house unlocked. She must have forgotten to lock it after he had stormed out. "Addison," he called out, but she didn't answer. He jogged up the stairs. "Addison?" – still nothing. "Shit," he muttered, as he began to get nervous. "Addison?" He was just about to call Sam or Violet when he noticed that the door to the back porch was slightly open. He quickly opened it, and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Addison out there, sitting on a lounge chair, staring out at the ocean.

"Hey," he said softly, trying to get her attention.

She turned to face him, and his heart broke as he took in her tear-stained face. Sure, he was still furious at her, but he had always hated seeing Addison cry. "Hey," she said quietly. "What are you doing here?"

He moved towards her and sat down on the lounge chair next to hers. "I shouldn't have stormed out," he apologized. "I should have let you explain…but I just got so angry, and I shut down. I tend to do that."

"I don't know if there's anything I can say that's going to make this better," Addison admitted.

"Probably not," Derek agreed sadly.

"I'm sorry I was condescending towards you and Meredith," Addison apologized. "I had absolutely no right to be."

Derek nodded. "Why'd you do it?" he asked. He took in Addison's confused expression. "Why'd you get the abortion?" he clarified.

He watched the tears begin to build in Addison's eyes, and wished that he could take back his words. "Hey, it's okay," he started, reaching out and touching her arm gently. "You don't have to tell me. It's none of my business."

But she shook her head. "It wasn't the right time for me to have a baby," she said simply. This time it was Addison, who watched confusion lace Derek's features. "I wasn't even gonna tell him," she confessed. "I wasn't gonna tell Mark, but then I did…tell him. And he was excited – uncharacteristically excited. He went out and bought this insane Yankees onesie and a calendar, and marked the due date. But he's Mark, and I caught him with someone else. And it wasn't the first time."

"So you got an abortion because Mark cheated on you?" Derek asked in confusion. That didn't sound like Addison at all.

Addison shook her head. "I got an abortion because, as much as I wanted a baby, it was the right decision for me at the time. I didn't want a baby with Mark. I didn't want a life with Mark. I wanted a life with you. I wanted a baby with you."

"Addison," Derek whispered.

"And I'm not saying that to make you feel guilty. I'm telling you this because you asked. It's just, I never thought I'd end up alone," Addison choked out, new tears building in her eyes.

"What are you talking about?" Derek asked. "You haven't ended up anywhere. And you definitely aren't alone. I mean, you've got Sam and everyone at the practice."

Addison nodded slightly. "It's just, I had all these plans about how my life would turn out and, well-"

"Hey, you know what Bizzy always used to say," Derek reminded her. "People plan and God laughs."

Addison gave him a weak smile. "Well, if that's the case, then God must be laughing pretty hard at me. I mean, here I was, married to a great guy, and I went and screwed it all up by sleeping with Mark. Then I aborted Mark's baby, only to find out that I can't have children anymore. Pretty freakin' hilarious, right?" She was trying to play it off as dry humor, but the tears in her eyes betrayed her best attempts.

"You can't have kids?" Derek asked softly, as he moved over to Addison's lounge chair and pulled her into his lap.

She shook her head. "I have a very, very low chance of ever being able to conceive. And I haven't exactly made having a baby a top priority lately. I mean, I'm dating a man who doesn't want anymore kids."

"What about what you want?" Derek asked gently.

"What I want," Addison chuckled dryly. "I want you to know that you have every right to be angry at me…well, not about the abortion. That's my business. But about everything else…you can be mad. And I can take it because, trust me, I'm already torturing myself more than you ever could. So, if you want to be angry with me…that's your right. I want you to know that. That's what I want."

"I'm not angry with you," Derek said, pulling Addison into a hug, and rubbing soft circles on her back. "Hurt, yes. But the thought of you pregnant with another man's child…it doesn't matter who he is…that thought is always going to hurt. And I guess that's my issue, so I'll get over it…eventually. You're going to be a really great mom, Addison, and I guess when Mark told me that you and him could have had a baby together…I guess I got a little jealous, you know, because you and me…we never had that chance."

Addison nodded. "I'm sorry you found out the way you did; although I guess there's really no good way to find out something like that."

"You know, in a way, I'm glad I found out," Derek admitted. "I mean, I obviously wish things hadn't happened the way they did, but…" he trailed off. "You know, I can't believe we talked about this like adults. I don't think we would have been able to talk about something like this back in New York or Seattle."

Addison nodded in agreement. "Hey, speaking of Seattle, when's your flight back?" she asked, moving out of Derek's arms so that she could meet his eyes.

Derek shrugged. "I never booked a flight back," he admitted. "I just said I was leaving…I couldn't follow through with it though."

Addison gave him a soft smile, and inwardly breathed a sigh of relief.

Derek returned her smile with a smile of his own. "Now, you were saying something about having Chinese food for dinner. Is that offer still on the table?"

Addison nodded. "I think that can be arranged."

"Good," Derek grinned. "And we should open a bottle of wine. It's been a rough couple of hours."

"Okay," Addison agreed. "Hey, Derek?" she began.

"Yes?"

"Thanks for coming back. Thanks for listening to me...even if it wasn't the easiest thing for you to listen to."

Derek smiled. "I'm sorry I stormed out before."

"You were angry," Addison shrugged. "You had every right to be angry."

"Yeah, but I should have stayed. I shouldn't have shut you out. And I'm not just talking about tonight. I shouldn't have shut you out back when we were married. God, I made so many mistakes when we were married."

Addison shook her head. "We both made mistakes," she said softly, taking Derek's hand in her own. "But I'm sure…I'm sure this next marriage will go better for you."

"Addison, I-" Derek stuttered, as he pulled Addison back into his lap, feeling a lump begin to build in his throat. He didn't feel like talking about his marriage to Meredith; he didn't feel like hearing more about Addison and Mark's past relationship; he didn't even want to begin to think about Addison's current relationship with Sam. He just wanted to be near Addison. So, he wrapped her in a tight hug and buried his head in her neck, deeply inhaling the scent of her Chanel No. 5 perfume, wishing his life wasn't so complicated.

xxxxx

Addison was in the middle of pouring wine when she heard the doorbell ring. "It's probably the Chinese delivery guy," she murmured to Derek, who was standing behind her with his arms wrapped around her waist. "Would you mind getting the door?"

"Sure," Derek agreed, making his way towards the door. He couldn't help smiling. He and Addison had made it through what could have been a disastrous fight, and things between them were going well. It was like they were in the makeup sex stage – well minus the sex part. They were both in relationships with other people, so sex wasn't exactly an option. But even though there wasn't sex, there was touching and occasional kissing, and Derek welcomed every second of it. Hell, they were technically still married, and they had just had one of the most intense conversations of his life, so he figured that a little touching and some occasional kissing was okay, even necessary, right now.

Still thinking about Addison, Derek smiled as he opened the door for the Chinese deliveryman. Only it wasn't the deliveryman. And Derek's smile quickly faded, and turned into a look of surprise. He felt his throat go dry as he tried to coax words out of his mouth.

"Meredith?"