The Secret Life of a Girl
Chapter X: Boy Gets Very, Very Drunk
Two days passed without either Eries or Marlene hearing anything from Allen. According to the guard that had replaced him at Marlene's side, he had sent word to Lord Ramkin that he was unwell and did not wish to expose the princess to his illness at a time when she should be celebrating. That excuse was accepted readily enough by his superiors - Lord Ramkin had thought he was sick to begin with - but it worried Eries. Being a knight, a Caeli, meant so much to Allen. Abandoning the duties of his post served as a signal of how deeply wounded he truly was.
On the third day, Eries took the matter into her own hands. She wheedled her way out of the negotiations with Freid that had been going on almost continuously since the engagement was announced and sought out Revius. He lived with Allen; he should know how he was doing. But even after she bombarded him with question after question covering every little subtlety of speech and body language, she didn't have much more information than what she started with. Revius hadn't spoken to let alone seen Allen enough to make any judgment on his mood beyond thinking that something was troubling him. He couldn't say how Allen was spending his days. After the engagement party, Allen had come home, gone to his room and stayed there. He had only seen him three times since then. The first was to give Revius the note for Lord Ramkin that explained his absenteeism. The other two times, Allen was on his way down to Tuvello's. That was how Allen was spending his nights.
She did not share this information with Marlene. Her sister had tried several times to ask Eries what she had heard of Allen, and each attempt was rebuffed by a tense "I don't know". What Eries would have liked to have said is "what do you care" but her years of emotional restraint kept her from revealing how intense her anger was. She didn't need Marlene asking her questions about why *she* cared so much.
Marlene had made her choice after all, just as Eries had done a few months earlier. Let Marlene suffer with the consequences as much as she had.
***
Marlene wasn't about to let Eries off so easily. Everywhere that Eries went, Marlene was bound to be there waiting. She couldn't blame her sister for that though. King Aston had insisted that Marlene stay at the palace now that she was officially betrothed. To compensate for that demand, he let her sit in on the planning sessions for the wedding, which Eries, as the only female council member, in the grand logic of patriarchal Asturia, was forced to attend as a head of the planning committee. Aston was even generous enough let Marlene cast a vote for which country the wedding should be held in. Naturally, she chose Asturia. Eries didn't commit either way, instead giving a list of pros and cons that favored Freid by a decent margin. It wasn't an outright betrayal of her sister, but it did get the undecided leaning towards there rather than here. Marlene got the point. She looked at Eries with a pleading downturn of her mouth until Eries couldn't take it anymore and turned her
attention to the task of crimping the edges of a list featuring the names of prominent foreign officials that should get invitations in the name of diplomacy. As far as Eries was concerned, the prime minister of Basram was welcome to attend because she certainly didn't want to. Eries didn't think she could take a traditional Asturian royal wedding. The last thing she wanted to see was Marlene and the Duke disembarking from their little gondolas to march between the perfect lines of twelve Caeli standing at attention.
Eries hurried off as soon as the meeting was over, but it wasn't long until she heard the soft footfalls of her sister behind her. She steeled herself against the inevitable "Eries, please" that had become Marlene's calling card to her. Sure enough, the pitiful plea began to echo through the hallway. Eries had heard it enough that she thought she was immune, but there was an edge in it this time. The "please" was barely audible and in its quiet, spoke of regret and longing.
It occurred to Eries that she didn't need to wish suffering on her sister. Marlene was inflicting enough on herself already. She slowed to allow Marlene to catch up with her.
When they reached a secluded alcove, the two stopped and Marlene spoke. "Thank you," she said with relief. "I've been wanting to talk to you."
"So I gathered." Eries' voice was cool but calm. She would let Marlene have her say.
"Eries, you're the only one who knows about..." Marlene paused as she checked the hall for anyone who could overhear. Once she was sure their conversation was private, she continued, "my relationship with Allen. And I want you to understand something."
I want you to understand. The last person to say that to Eries had been Allen, when he was trying to get her to accept that relationship. Eries clenched her fist, the tips of her fingers digging slightly into her palm. It kept her from lashing out at the woman who had seemingly thrown away everything that everyone had sacrificed so much to give to her.
"I want you to understand," Marlene repeated, a little stronger this time, "That the last thing I wanted to do was hurt Allen. I wish more than anything that he could have found out about the engagement in better circumstances, but Father was so quick to announce it."
"As you were so quick to agree to it." Eries looked away from Marlene. Her control was not what it needed to be.
Marlene issued another "Eries please" but this one had a force to it that the others lacked. "I don't need this hostility right now. I feel bad enough as it is."
"Oh, you feel bad. My sympathies."
"Why are you so...Never mind. I know you're upset with me. I'm not terribly pleased with myself either. But I had no other choice but to agree with the engagement."
"You could have said no." Eries' voice rose beyond the whispers the two sisters had been speaking in. The "no" resonated through the hall. Eries dug her nails in a little deeper.
"I did say no. At first..." Marlene's voice left her. With it, went her control. She cast her head downwards, letting her hair fall across her face to cover the tears that were beginning to form. "I did say no..." she repeated softly.
Eries was at a loss. She so seldom had any sort of emotional outbursts of her own, she didn't know how to handle them in other people. She unclenched her hand and brought it up to her chest. She should have extended it to Marlene, placed it on her shoulder in a show of sorority, but couldn't bring herself to try. Guilt, not fury, locked her arm in place. Marlene had come seeking solace and received recriminations instead.
Why must I always be my sister's keeper? Eries asked herself even as she once again slid back into the role. "Tell me what happened, Marlene. What did Father say to you?"
Marlene dabbed at the wetness in her eyes, using the time it took to better compose herself. "You know, I remembered thinking on those nights out at the theater and whatnot, that the Duke was going out of his way to be considerate and kind to me. I didn't pay it much mind at the time. I thought he was still trying to make up for the air pirates. I was too busy casting secret looks at Allen, anyway. But then that night we went to the opera and so much was made of getting rid of Allen, it started to sink in. He was trying to court me! Can you imagine that? All he had to do was make Father an offer, but the man actually wanted to court me first. It flattered and scared me all at once. That night at the villa, I went over everything he had ever said to me, trying to convince myself that I was wrong. I had to be wrong. I had finally found a man who truly loves and understands me and after just the briefest time together, Fate, no Father, was conspiring to take him away from me.
Then Father summoned me to his study, and any hopes I had were dashed. Just from the way Father greeted me, I knew what was coming. He asked what I thought of the Duke. I told him the truth. I said he was a kind man, a good man but I would be relieved when he returned to Freid and my escorting duties were over with."
"Father shook his head. `Is that all?' he asked. `Has he not treated you well? He's not some power hungry suitor, you know. You've charmed him completely. He cares for you.' He said more, but nothing I didn't already know or desired to face. Every word was just leading to the inevitable."
Marlene paused in her narrative as two guardsmen strolled by. They bowed to the princesses and received two strained smiles for their efforts. Once they were safely out of view, Marlene slumped against the wall as if drained. Emotionally, she was - sufficiently enough that Eries had to plead with her to continue.
"Finally, Father mentioned `his' proposal. I tried to put him off. I said I would think about it. He said the Duke was going back to Freid in a few days and I had no time. I asked why we couldn't let the Duke know when he was back home. Father claimed that wouldn't work. Freid was weak now. If we waited, the climate could change and they might no longer need us. So I sat up straight in my chair and in the boldest voice I could muster, I said, `Fine, you need your answer now? Your answer is no.' Father was not happy."
Eries knew how upset King Aston had been at her for merely not committing to help him. She could not imagine how furious he was at Marlene for actually defying his wishes.
"You know the dark quaver Father gets in his voice when he's angry but trying to pretend that he's calm? That's all I heard for the next five minutes. He demanded to know why. I said I didn't want to get married, that I wanted to stay in Asturia with my family. He explained that he understood, but at eighteen, I've already had more time with my family than most princesses got. Then he asked if I wanted to be with you all so much, why had I been hiding at the villa all summer. I didn't know how to answer him. Father was gracious enough to not press the point."
"If only he had dropped the topic of marriage so easily. He kept saying, `He's a good man. You get along well with him. You like him, yes?' And I said, `Yes, I like him, but I don't love him.' As soon as it was out of my mouth, I knew I had misspoken. Father's expression changed. It might have been the way I said the word `love', but Father was suddenly suspicious. `Love for your husband will come later, Marlene. But is there something about now that you wish to tell me? Is there another reason why you're refusing me?' Again, I couldn't speak. Father was so close to the truth."
A glimmer of understanding began to creep into Eries' mind. The truth would not have been good for anyone. Marlene might have been able to weather the fallout, but others would not be so lucky.
"I just stared at him. I tried to get out, `Whatever do you mean?' but my voice cracked so badly, it was as if I had just confirmed his suspicions. He drummed his fingers along his desk and spoke very deliberately, `You were so sullen the past year, but recently, I, no everyone, couldn't help but notice how much your mood has improved. I didn't question it before. I was happy enough just to have the old Marlene back. But now, I think I have to ask.' I couldn't believe how harsh he sounded. I didn't think it could get any worse, but what he asked me next... `So tell me, Marlene,' he said, `What exactly have you been doing at the villa when that guard of yours goes home?' Even if it was just in passing, the reference to Allen panicked me. I might be able to deny everything now, but if Father were distrustful enough, he would do a full-scale investigation into the matter. And when he found out...So I did the only thing I could think of."
"You said yes to get Father to back off," Eries supplied. "You let Allen go to protect him."
Marlene nodded. It was just as Eries had surmised. With her story told, Marlene resumed the soft crying of before, "Please, Eries if you can think of anything..."
Eries couldn't. She saw no way out of the situation as it was now. The Duke would be returning to Freid a few days hence with Marlene as his fiancée and nothing could stop it. Nothing logical. For a brief, terrifying moment, the notion that Marlene and Allen might run away together flickered across her thoughts, but Eries quickly squelched it. Allen might be foolish enough to try something so rash; Marlene would not be. Her decision to marry Duke Freid was based on the knowledge of the strength and scope of King Aston's grasp.
Her apologies were all Eries could give to her sister. Marlene accepted them with but a single request. "Now that you understand, could you please do me one more favor? I don't know where Allen is. I don't know what he's doing. I don't see a way for me to get away from the palace long enough to find him, especially with the engagement party tonight. You've always been so good at disappearing from these things. Do you think you could find him? Make sure that he's all right?"
"I'll do what I can."
"Please, Eries. Take care of him for me."
***
The palace staff had outdone themselves in preparing for the party to formally announce the engagement. Double shifts and a sizable expense account had resulted in a menagerie of ice sculptures, a small garden's worth of flowers and enough food to feed the entire country. A string quartet was situated in a corner of the hall, playing soft, traditional Asturian ballads. At the head of the hall were two chairs reserved for the groom and bride to be. Above the chairs, hung a portrait of the couple painted by one of Asturia's most renowned artists. The artist stood near his work offering up apologies for its hasty composition. Duke Freid and King Aston were with him assuring him not to worry. The engagement had come together rather quickly and the portrait was excellently done. Duke Freid seemed quite taken with it in fact. His gaze lingered on the painted Marlene and the warm smile the artist had given her. A smile that he very much wished to see on the face of the real
Marlene.
He was not going to get his wish tonight though. When Marlene entered the hall, she had the same polite but slightly distant expression that had become her mask. She proffered a gracious "thank you" to all that congratulated her and even gave out a few mannered laughs to the especially enthusiastic well-wishers. A good performance for her, really, but a mechanical one. If one looked close enough, they could see her good cheer wasn't reflected in her eyes. Her voice was measured, precise and her words never went beyond the usual clichés about marriage. If one was observant enough, they could come to the conclusion that Marlene wasn't happy at all.
Duke Freid watched Marlene work her way through the crowd. She was taking her time, talking to each and every guest, in what could be taken as an attempt to delay her arrival at his side. He made a second wish to be less astute about his fiancée's mood and then set about making his wish come true by quickly downing two glasses of vino in short succession.
Eries surveyed it all from her position outside the hall. Tonight was Marlene's night, so it would take longer than usual for the younger princesses to be announced. Eries couldn't care less but Millerna was getting restless. She was currently chatting away with a trio of handmaidens about how beautiful Marlene was and the general romance and glory of weddings. Eries envied her little sister's obliviousness for the moment even though she knew Millerna would be in for some rude awakenings as she got older.
The whole affair looked more like a theater production than a party. Marlene looked and acted like one of Millerna's porcelain dolls. Duke Freid was at the back at the hall trying very hard not to notice. The guests milled about like clueless extras while King Aston directed the evening. He had just given the signal for Eries and Millerna to enter.
Eries thought of her own directions. Enter two princesses. MIDDLE PRINCESS visibly disgruntled. YOUNGEST PRINCESS vibrant. CROWD quiets as PAGE announces them. Exeunt MIDDLE PRINCESS as she runs off to take care of things far more important than a stupid party for an arranged marriage.
As much as she wanted to run though, Eries played her role as she had been raised to do. She and Millerna joined the rest of the partygoers and the evening was officially underway. With a nod from King Aston, the string quartet began playing livelier music and the middle of the hall was cleared for dancing. By this time, Marlene had actually managed to make it over to Duke Freid. The crowd eyed them, waiting for them to take the floor, but all they got was an exchange of pleasantries.
They weren't the only ones who were disappointed. King Aston took his daughter aside and said a few things Eries couldn't make out, but she doubted it was warm, fatherly advice. Marlene and the King smiled throughout the entire conversation. The crowd though nothing of it, but Eries knew those expressions well. It was just another of those "friendly" chats with Aston had with his daughters when they weren't behaving quite the way they should at a public event.
Whatever King Aston said seemed to have worked. Marlene quickly returned to the Duke and led him off for a waltz. Eries was relieved. If Marlene couldn't get her act together, she would be in for more than a small lecture. And if King Aston ever found out why she was acting the way she was... The word scandal hardly covered the repercussions. And Eries knew damn well who the scapegoat for everything would be.
***
Somehow, after only an hour's worth of partying, over a third of the food and half the drink had been consumed. Eries hadn't eaten hardly any of it herself but nonetheless hung around the table holding the fruit platters. She absently poked at some sculpted melons while watching yet another dance wind down. Throughout the evening, her father had motioned for her to come over, but she remained where she was. People were staying away the healthier fare and the bitterness of the piscus seemed apropos.
Millerna, bounding about from guest to guest with joy for her sister, was more than making up for her lack of social grace anyway. And covering for Marlene as well. She had just begun a dance with her soon to be brother in-law. Eries had to admit it; it was an amusing site. The tall duke first crouched down, then bent over and then finally gave up and let the nine-year-old stand on his feet while he led them through the steps. The men laughed and the women cooed at the cuteness of it all. For Eries, it just reaffirmed her opinion of him. He was a good man - a good man trapped in a bad situation that he wasn't even aware of.
Marlene wasn't impressed. When she approached Eries, her face reverted to a sullen frown.
"I see you managed to find a hiding place as usual, Eries."
"Just waiting for the perfect moment to make my escape."
"One of these days, you'll have to teach me your trick," Marlene laughed nervously.
"I learned it from - " Eries said questioningly. Surely Marlene had told Allen how much she hated these parties too. Why hadn't he told her? "Never mind. If anyone asks, not that they ever do, tell them I felt ill and went back to my chambers."
"Of course. Eries, I don't mean to push you, but do you think you could leave soon? I need to know that Allen has someone with him. Is there anything I can do to help?"
"It's all about distraction, Marlene. If you took a dance with the Duke, I could announce my departure and no one would care."
"Okay, as soon as Millerna's through," Marlene said and then, for the first time in a year, she hugged Eries. Holding her close, she whispered into Eries' ear, "Thank you. For everything. I'm counting on you to watch over him."
She released Eries from the embrace, but took hold of her little sister's hands. Marlene didn't say anything more; she just looked at Eries, letting the love and faith she placed in her come through more meaningfully than the most poetic of words.
Then she was off. Marlene had a fiancée to dance with. Eries had a mission of her own.
***
Eries worked her way out of the crowd inconspicuously with her usual grace. She had skipped out on so many of these affairs, she had perfected the art. It bothered her more than she would admit that no one ever noticed she was gone. Or maybe they noticed and didn't care. She would never be mistaken for the life of the party. Either way, she was grateful for it tonight. Allen had a history of extreme reactions to losing the people he loved that had Eries scared as well as concerned.
Before she left the palace, she ducked into the laundry room and changed into a nondescript dress of a handmaiden. She stuffed her own ball gown among a large pile of sheets where, the next morning, it became the treasure of the wardrobe of the laundress who found it.
The fate of her gown was the last thing on Eries' mind. After her talk with Marlene, Eries had found Revius again to get the latest news on Allen. Apparently, Allen had pulled himself together enough to report for duty for the time it took for him to convince Lord Ramkin to give him a few days leave. He pleaded some problems with his familial estate that needed immediate attention. Revius assumed he had gone back to Tuvello's as soon as his request was granted. He certainly hadn't been seen around the palace afterwards.
Though the places she had to search had been narrowed down, Eries would have liked to have heard something different. Allen was now lying to his superiors to have more time to go to a bar. That was a bad, bad sign. She held out hope that Allen had gone back to the flat to brood instead, but when she reached the street on which Tuvello's was located, she headed straight for the tavern.
Allen was there all right, sitting at a table by himself with the exception of two barmaids that hovered around him offering up more liquor and other sundry favors. Eries shooed them away with a glare. Her expression did not change for Allen. Going by the large quantity of empty glasses on the table, he had to be drunk, but she couldn't tell how badly. Being dressed as he was in full uniform, he still looked like he had some composure.
That illusion was quickly dispelled when he tried to mimic her stern face and instead, wound up laughing so hard he nearly fell out of his chair. The barmaids rushed over to help but got within a foot of Eries and suddenly discovered another patron that needed assistance.
Eries tapped her fingers against the table. The anger she had felt towards Marlene was beginning to focus on someone else. She felt for Allen, she truly did, but this was not the way to make anything better. It was much more probable that it would make things worse.
"You could have at least changed out your uniform before coming here to make a display of yourself."
Allen dismissed her lecture. "Tuvello's is an old Caeli bar. It's tradition."
"The tradition is for Caeli to come here in their civilian clothing. I seem to remember Alucier saying something about `respect for the uniform'."
Allen shook his head no. "Do you have any idea what a pain in the ass it is to get in and out of this?" He tugged on the fabric that hung around his neck to illustrate. "This...pink...thing...alone takes forever."
"It's called a cravat, Allen." Eries leaned across the table and in one fluid motion, hooked her fingers under the offending neckwear, gave a yank and pulled the cravat off into her hand.
Allen was enthralled. "How did you - "
"Can we go now?"
"You can leave anytime you want."
"Oh, but I'm just a poor, helpless princess away from her palace. I'll need someone to escort me back." She had no intentions of taking him back to the palace, but she needed to say something to get him out of this bar.
"Nuh-uh. I'm not drunk enough to fall for that."
Eries sighed. "Fine, Allen. I'll just sit here while you have a few more and then ask you again in fifteen minutes when you will be. Or you can save us both some time by succumbing to the inevitable."
Allen considered for a minute. "That'll probably work."
"Good. You still have some sense about you."
But not much balance. When Allen stood, he swayed forward and had to grab the table to keep from falling. Eries got up to help him before the barmaids could. She put his right arm over her shoulders and held onto him as they maneuvered their way out of the bar. He leaned on her heavily, putting himself so close to her that under the smell of the alcohol on his breath, she could pick out the clean, faintly sweet scent of his hair and a deeper, spicier trace of the cologne he wore. She made a concerted effort not to think about the warmth of his body against hers.
Once they left the bar, Eries steered him towards the stairs that led to his flat. There was no way she was going to be able to help him up the narrow stairway.
And Allen wasn't about to make the trip on his own. "I thought we were going to the palace."
"Uh, we're making a minor detour."
"Oh."
At least he was an agreeable drunk. He seemed rather mellow in general. Mellow enough that Eries decided she could leave him alone to check to see if Revius was home yet. He would be better able to get him up the stairs than she was. She didn't see any light coming from the flat but she knew from Allen that it wasn't uncommon for Revius to turn in early. Of course, he only went to bed early when someone else went with him. Eries didn't want to interrupt (more for her own benefit than Revius') but she didn't see where she had much choice in the matter.
She propped Allen up against the wall and went up the steps. Behind her, she heard him slide promptly down the wall and hit the ground with an undignified thud.
Well, isn't this just too wonderful. My sister's a mess. My best friend is dead drunk. And I'm counting on Allen's sleazy roommate to be home with some tramp.
He wasn't. The door was locked; nobody answered her repeated knocks. Eries muttered a four-letter word that would have sent the court into hysterics, went back down the stairs and then muttered it again. In the whole minute she had been gone, Allen had gotten up and wandered back towards the bar.
"NO!" She said it forcefully enough that not only did he stop, so did several other people out in the street. The ones that kept moving looked a little guilty about it. "I meant him," she said as she went to collect Allen. Now everyone came to a stop; they wanted to see what was going on between the handmaiden and the Knight Caeli. In the most commanding voice she had learned in her fifteen years as a princess, Eries yelled, "GO HOME!"
They went, quickly too. Allen stayed where he was. The part of his brain that wasn't swimming in alcohol was emphatically telling him to listen to Eries *very* carefully. Right now, she was saying something about going upstairs and needing a key. There was another thing about Revius. He was coming home? No, he should be going home. No, wait. That was Eries. Eries was going to go home. And he was supposed to escort her. He thought.
"Come on, Princess. We should be heading back to the palace."
"Don't call me that and are you insane? You can't show your face there in the condition you're in. And you shouldn't be anywhere near that party anyway. Now, give me the key to your flat and somehow, I'll get you up those steps and home. You need to sleep this off."
"No, I'm fine. It's not safe for you to be out by yourself at night. I should walk you back."
"Not safe? I walked here, didn't I?!"
Allen wasn't in a state receptive to logic. He insisted on taking her back to palace and took her arm to lead her away. At first, she held her ground, but all that resulted in was him pulling her along. She finally relented with a growl of frustration.
Lovely. Chivalry isn't dead, it's just had a few.
***
"I can't believe how many steps there are in this stairwell. Are there more steps than there used to be?"
"Yes, Allen. We added several more floors to the palace since you were here this afternoon. Now keep moving." Eries tried not to snap at Allen, but he had been like this during the entire trip from Tuvello's. She had heard of angry drunks. She had heard of depressed drunks. She hadn't heard of whiny drunks.
"It just seems like there's more steps."
She gave him a push to motivate him forward. Instead, it caused him to trip on one of steps he had been complaining about. He was still coordinated enough to keep himself from falling, but the close call put an end to his climb. He sat down and then sprawled out across the steps.
"I'm going to rest for awhile," he announced.
"That can't be comfortable," Eries countered.
Allen yawned and settled in deeper for his impromptu nap. Eries sat down beside him. Things could be worse. She wasn't sure if it was Jichia or one of the lesser deities that was watching over her, but by some miracle she had gotten Allen all the way to the third floor without a major disaster. And considering she'd spent the last thirty minutes leading a noticeably wobbly Caeli through the bustling streets of Palas, she had earned a break of her own. It would give her time to think of what to do with Allen. He was hell-bent on seeing her to her bedroom door so he could be absolutely, positively sure she had made it in for the night safe and sound. Now, that door was but twenty feet away and she hadn't any clue what came next. She couldn't send him back out into the streets in the state he was in.
Five minutes. I just need five minutes to think. She had leaned back approximately one quarter of an inch when she heard the creak of the wooden door at the bottom of the stairwell. Somebody was coming.
"I'm really not that tired, Lord Ramkin. Father didn't have to send me to bed so early."
"I believe it's well past your regular bedtime as it is, Princess. Your father just wanted to make sure you weren't overtired for when you help your sister pack tomorrow. It`s going to be a big day for you and your sisters."
"Oh! I just remembered! Marlene said Eries was sick. I want to see if she'll be okay for tomorrow."
Eries assessed the situation. Lord Ramkin and Millerna were coming. Allen was supposed to off at his family estate taking care of legal matters. Allen was passed out at the top of the stairs *in uniform*. Eries was supposed to be sick in bed. Eries was dressed like a handmaiden and sitting by a passed out Caeli.
Eries' four-letter word of choice got its third usage for the night.
She didn't dare speak above a whisper. With its stone walls, every noise echoed through this stairwell, becoming louder and louder. She could every word that Millerna said as her little sister begged Lord Ramkin to let her stay up just a tiny bit longer, please?
With great care, Eries grabbed Allen's uniform where it fastened at the shoulder and began shaking him. "...wake up, allen...if you don't wake up this instant, lord ramkin is going to find you and he is going to want to know why you're here and why you reek of alcohol and why you're doing this all in your uniform...and in my most horrifying nightmare, i cannot imagine the explanation you'll blather out given how drunk you are...so you're going to wake up and we're going to find a nice place for you to hide...okay?...okay."
She hefted him up into a sitting position hoping that would bring him around. It did partially. He mumbled incoherently then moved to get comfy again.
"no, no, no, no, no, no, no...we need to get moving...come on, give me your arm and you can lean on me just like earlier and i'll help you up and we'll get you to my room and then...i'll come up with something."
Allen more or less complied or rather, didn't resist when Eries threw his arm across her shoulders and braced herself to pull him up. He didn't exactly help her with the actual effort of getting him standing, though.
"come on, come on...i can't carry you..."
Judging from the volume of their voices, Lord Ramkin and Millerna had reached the top of the first flight of stairs. Two more and Eries would have a lot of explaining to do. Desperate, Eries did the only thing she could think of - she kicked him. It had worked once with Maerzen anyway.
She discovered the fatal flaw of her plan when Allen yelled out an "oww" of protest. Two floors down, the voices of an old man and little girl asked, "what was that?" in unison.
Eries really had to haul it now.
With a yank that would cost her in back pain in the morning, she pulled Allen up. Twenty feet of forward motion and they would be in the clear. Again, she had to support him but he was groggier than he had been before and she had the additional task of dragging him along. It was extremely slow going.
Drag. Drag.
"Stay here, Princess. I'll check on ahead."
Take your time, Old Man Ramkin.
Drag. Drag.
"No, I wanna see! Hurry up!"
Shut up, Millerna.
Drag. Drag. Drag.
"Come on! I think it came from close to Eries' room!"
No it didn't. Go away.
Drag. Drag. Door. She had to open the door. She had to keep hold of Allen or he'd fall. She leaned enough so that Allen would be propped up against her, allowing her to have one her hands free.
The door opened just as steps echoed up from halfway up the second set of stairs. In in graceful maneuver that she would never be able to replicate in a million tries, she flung open the door, shoved Allen through it, followed him into the room, caught him and gently eased him to the floor. It would have been perfect if she had been able to shut the door.
"Princess Eries?" Lord Ramkin called. The mystery sound paired with the suspiciously ajar door to her room must have alarmed him. His pace quickened.
Eries reached out with her foot and managed to catch the edge of the door. Another kick and the door swung shut on Lord Ramkin's face hard enough to cause the elder knight to utter a curse under his breath. Eries lunged for the lock before he had time to recover.
"Princess Eries?" he called again.
"Could you give me a moment? I, uh...I'm not quite properly dressed." It was embarrassing, but it would keep Lord Ramkin out of her room until she gave him permission to enter.
"Is that Lord Ramkin?" Allen asked sleepily as he came back to life.
"Now you're fully awake. Hurry up. We've got a minute at the most."
In a rush, Allen opened the windows while Eries mussed the bed sheets to make it look as if she had been recently sleeping. She put a robe on over her handmaiden's dress and directed Allen to stow away in the bathroom. He was looking a trifle green. The bathroom would have been the best place for him even if he didn't need to hide.
After everything was set, Eries let Lord Ramkin in with Millerna trailing right behind him. "Is something wrong?" she asked innocently.
"I'm sorry to disturb you, Princess, but I heard a strange noise and I saw your door was open. I was concerned for your safety."
"Noise? I didn't hear anything. As for the door, I was feeling feverish. I opened the windows to try to get a breeze in but the air wasn't stirring. I opened to door for better ventilation. That got the air flowing. Too much, I guess. My apologies."
"No need to, your majesty. I'm just relieved you're all right."
Millerna wasn't so sure she was. She kept asking Eries questions about her fever and quizzing her on symptoms.
"You're not a doctor yet, Millerna. Now off to bed with you. We both need our sleep."
Eries flopped to her bed in complete exhaustion as soon as they were safely gone. From the bathroom, Allen praised her performance. "Wow. You're good."
"I thought the part about the windows and the open door sound too much like an explanation."
"Lord Ramkin bought it." As an afterthought, "He's kind of gullible that way."
"Is that why he fell for your ridiculous `estate legal matters' excuse? You settled that estate in the spring. And will you please come out of the bathroom? I feel like I'm shouting. We've already avoided one disaster. I really don't want to attract another."
"Umm, I think it might be a good idea if I stayed in here for awhile. I'm not feeling so good..."
Eries covered her head with one of the numerous decorative pillows that took up the top half of the bed. She didn't want to listen to the details. After a few minutes, she felt the bed dip as Allen seated himself on the corner. His presence there reminded her of a dream she had last month, one of those dreams in which everything is so tangible and vivid that, upon waking, seems more memory than fancy. Except Eries was dead certain the events of that dream had never taken place and, with Allen a few inches away from her, she wished fervently that the dream itself had never occurred. From under her pillow, her cheeks burned red.
"It's not like he knew."
"What?"
"Lord Ramkin. It's not like he knew that I already settled the estate."
"You never told him?"
"I don't play well with other males, remember?"
"Hmm. I didn't know you listened so well." Heartened by Allen's recall of her past advice, Eries found the strength to cast the pillow aside. Allen was closer to her than she had thought. When she sat up, they were shoulder to shoulder. Eries missed her pillow already.
Okay. Breathe. Talk about something. Do anything but think about *that*. "You'll have to go back on duty eventually." That was as benign as she could get.
"I know. But not now. When does Marlene leave anyway?"
"Day after tomorrow."
"8^th moon." Allen slumped forward, putting his head in his hands. "Of course it would be 8^th moon. That's how my life works."
So he was a depressed drunk after all. Eries asked in confusion, "What's the significance of 8^th moon?"
"Her birthday. Celena's birthday. She'll be ten. That's sort of a big one, isn't it? Crossing into the double digits?"
He thinks she's still alive out there? Eries wasn't going to touch that. In two days, Marlene would be gone from his life forever. Robbing him of the hope that one day he might actually get back one of his lost loved ones would have been cruel. "You shouldn't be alone then, Allen. I don't think your sister would want you suffering in solitude on her special day, do you?"
"I'm Marlene's guard, Eries. If I go back on duty, I would be required to escort her to the Duke's leviship and hand her over to his protection. It's all perfectly symbolic and ironic in a twisted, sick, nasty way and I cannot deal with it."
"So you're not going see her again. You'll just let things lie as they are?"
"I don't see what choice I have."
"Neither did she. She's not marrying Duke Freid by choice, you know. There are...extenuating circumstances. You should let her explain." Eries wasn't sure if she should be telling him this. She had done more than enough for Allen and Marlene's relationship. And yet, now that it was all but over, despite her feelings, despite the possible consequences, she was still urging Allen to see her sister one last time. "You've already lost a lot of people that you care about. At least with Marlene you have a chance to resolve things, to say goodbye."
Closure. That was the word she was looking for. It was something he had never gotten with anyone else. His father left as if he was going on a routine expedition, his sister vanished into nothingness and his mother had fallen ill so suddenly. Perhaps that was part of the reason he dwelled on them so.
"Allen?"
"Hmm?"
"You'll think about it, won't you?"
"Mmm..."
"I thought I was the reticent one."
"Is that your fancy way of rephrasing you're the 'Quiet One'?"
"I suppose I prefer quiet to some of the other adjectives I've heard used."
"Like what? The Moody One?"
"That's Marlene."
"If you say so. The Sarcastic One?"
"Alas, I seldom show that side to the palace rabble."
"The One Who Kicks Really Damn Hard?"
"That was a desperate measure!"
"Riiiight. I talk to Alucier. He tells me how you abuse him."
"Allen!" An indignant cry from her wasn't about to stop his laughter. Knowing it would only give credence to his teasing, and therefore, make him laugh harder, she gave him a light shove on the shoulder. Happy drunk was a marked improvement over whiny or depressed drunk.
He laughed for another minute, a giddy, dreaming sort of laugh that was always fleeting, but nonetheless comforting. Eries was sad to hear it end. Especially since he resumed his questioning.
"So what do they call you?"
"You've had to have heard people talking about me around the palace."
"I spent most of my on duty hours at the villa."
"Are you really going to make me say it?"
Allen nodded. He was going to make her say it.
"Words that occur frequently are odd, cold, plain...must I go on?"
"Plain?"
"Plain as in plain boring. Or plain as in plain looking."
"Really?" Allen was dubious. "I always thought you had this regal, exotic air about you."
"Really?" It was Eries' turn to doubt.
"Don't tell Marlene this," he said, his voice going low, "But you're one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen." He wavered for a moment, almost giggling to himself. "On second thought, tell her. And be really pissy about it."
"Allen..."
He had said much the same thing in her dream. That and other things she couldn't hope to hear now. Things she shouldn't technically want to hear now, but surfaced in her thoughts anyhow. Her feverish feelings were no longer pretext.
He turned towards her, leaned close to her until she was lost in a sea of sapphire as his eyes held hers. She breathed in the aroma of vino.
"Allen, you don't have to flatter me," she said timidly.
He placed one hand one her shoulder as she felt the other touch lightly on her cheek. It kept her still as he pronounced, in all earnestness, "By the gods, Eries...you are beautiful."
And then, Allen Crusade Schezar VIII, Knight Caeli and the everything of Eries Aston's heart and soul, passed out and fell into her lap.
"Oh."
***
Author's Notes - This is getting ridiculous. I fully expected this chapter to be short and breezy and it turned out to be another monster. I don't even have Alucier around to blame... Anyway, I'm giving you fair warning. Considering the ground I want to cover, I'm thinking the next chapter's going to be a big sucker that might take awhile to get out. Of course, given how far off I've been in estimating chapter length, one of two things will probably happen: I'll wind up with the sequel to Infinite Jest (uh, a really, really, really big, damn, long novel for the less literary pretentious out there) or it'll consist of six words and a period. Eh, we'll see.
Next up - Girl and Boy vs. Life. And - because he seems to have gotten himself a fan club - yes, Alucier (or Maerzen, whatever you want to call him) is baaaaack.
Chapter X: Boy Gets Very, Very Drunk
Two days passed without either Eries or Marlene hearing anything from Allen. According to the guard that had replaced him at Marlene's side, he had sent word to Lord Ramkin that he was unwell and did not wish to expose the princess to his illness at a time when she should be celebrating. That excuse was accepted readily enough by his superiors - Lord Ramkin had thought he was sick to begin with - but it worried Eries. Being a knight, a Caeli, meant so much to Allen. Abandoning the duties of his post served as a signal of how deeply wounded he truly was.
On the third day, Eries took the matter into her own hands. She wheedled her way out of the negotiations with Freid that had been going on almost continuously since the engagement was announced and sought out Revius. He lived with Allen; he should know how he was doing. But even after she bombarded him with question after question covering every little subtlety of speech and body language, she didn't have much more information than what she started with. Revius hadn't spoken to let alone seen Allen enough to make any judgment on his mood beyond thinking that something was troubling him. He couldn't say how Allen was spending his days. After the engagement party, Allen had come home, gone to his room and stayed there. He had only seen him three times since then. The first was to give Revius the note for Lord Ramkin that explained his absenteeism. The other two times, Allen was on his way down to Tuvello's. That was how Allen was spending his nights.
She did not share this information with Marlene. Her sister had tried several times to ask Eries what she had heard of Allen, and each attempt was rebuffed by a tense "I don't know". What Eries would have liked to have said is "what do you care" but her years of emotional restraint kept her from revealing how intense her anger was. She didn't need Marlene asking her questions about why *she* cared so much.
Marlene had made her choice after all, just as Eries had done a few months earlier. Let Marlene suffer with the consequences as much as she had.
***
Marlene wasn't about to let Eries off so easily. Everywhere that Eries went, Marlene was bound to be there waiting. She couldn't blame her sister for that though. King Aston had insisted that Marlene stay at the palace now that she was officially betrothed. To compensate for that demand, he let her sit in on the planning sessions for the wedding, which Eries, as the only female council member, in the grand logic of patriarchal Asturia, was forced to attend as a head of the planning committee. Aston was even generous enough let Marlene cast a vote for which country the wedding should be held in. Naturally, she chose Asturia. Eries didn't commit either way, instead giving a list of pros and cons that favored Freid by a decent margin. It wasn't an outright betrayal of her sister, but it did get the undecided leaning towards there rather than here. Marlene got the point. She looked at Eries with a pleading downturn of her mouth until Eries couldn't take it anymore and turned her
attention to the task of crimping the edges of a list featuring the names of prominent foreign officials that should get invitations in the name of diplomacy. As far as Eries was concerned, the prime minister of Basram was welcome to attend because she certainly didn't want to. Eries didn't think she could take a traditional Asturian royal wedding. The last thing she wanted to see was Marlene and the Duke disembarking from their little gondolas to march between the perfect lines of twelve Caeli standing at attention.
Eries hurried off as soon as the meeting was over, but it wasn't long until she heard the soft footfalls of her sister behind her. She steeled herself against the inevitable "Eries, please" that had become Marlene's calling card to her. Sure enough, the pitiful plea began to echo through the hallway. Eries had heard it enough that she thought she was immune, but there was an edge in it this time. The "please" was barely audible and in its quiet, spoke of regret and longing.
It occurred to Eries that she didn't need to wish suffering on her sister. Marlene was inflicting enough on herself already. She slowed to allow Marlene to catch up with her.
When they reached a secluded alcove, the two stopped and Marlene spoke. "Thank you," she said with relief. "I've been wanting to talk to you."
"So I gathered." Eries' voice was cool but calm. She would let Marlene have her say.
"Eries, you're the only one who knows about..." Marlene paused as she checked the hall for anyone who could overhear. Once she was sure their conversation was private, she continued, "my relationship with Allen. And I want you to understand something."
I want you to understand. The last person to say that to Eries had been Allen, when he was trying to get her to accept that relationship. Eries clenched her fist, the tips of her fingers digging slightly into her palm. It kept her from lashing out at the woman who had seemingly thrown away everything that everyone had sacrificed so much to give to her.
"I want you to understand," Marlene repeated, a little stronger this time, "That the last thing I wanted to do was hurt Allen. I wish more than anything that he could have found out about the engagement in better circumstances, but Father was so quick to announce it."
"As you were so quick to agree to it." Eries looked away from Marlene. Her control was not what it needed to be.
Marlene issued another "Eries please" but this one had a force to it that the others lacked. "I don't need this hostility right now. I feel bad enough as it is."
"Oh, you feel bad. My sympathies."
"Why are you so...Never mind. I know you're upset with me. I'm not terribly pleased with myself either. But I had no other choice but to agree with the engagement."
"You could have said no." Eries' voice rose beyond the whispers the two sisters had been speaking in. The "no" resonated through the hall. Eries dug her nails in a little deeper.
"I did say no. At first..." Marlene's voice left her. With it, went her control. She cast her head downwards, letting her hair fall across her face to cover the tears that were beginning to form. "I did say no..." she repeated softly.
Eries was at a loss. She so seldom had any sort of emotional outbursts of her own, she didn't know how to handle them in other people. She unclenched her hand and brought it up to her chest. She should have extended it to Marlene, placed it on her shoulder in a show of sorority, but couldn't bring herself to try. Guilt, not fury, locked her arm in place. Marlene had come seeking solace and received recriminations instead.
Why must I always be my sister's keeper? Eries asked herself even as she once again slid back into the role. "Tell me what happened, Marlene. What did Father say to you?"
Marlene dabbed at the wetness in her eyes, using the time it took to better compose herself. "You know, I remembered thinking on those nights out at the theater and whatnot, that the Duke was going out of his way to be considerate and kind to me. I didn't pay it much mind at the time. I thought he was still trying to make up for the air pirates. I was too busy casting secret looks at Allen, anyway. But then that night we went to the opera and so much was made of getting rid of Allen, it started to sink in. He was trying to court me! Can you imagine that? All he had to do was make Father an offer, but the man actually wanted to court me first. It flattered and scared me all at once. That night at the villa, I went over everything he had ever said to me, trying to convince myself that I was wrong. I had to be wrong. I had finally found a man who truly loves and understands me and after just the briefest time together, Fate, no Father, was conspiring to take him away from me.
Then Father summoned me to his study, and any hopes I had were dashed. Just from the way Father greeted me, I knew what was coming. He asked what I thought of the Duke. I told him the truth. I said he was a kind man, a good man but I would be relieved when he returned to Freid and my escorting duties were over with."
"Father shook his head. `Is that all?' he asked. `Has he not treated you well? He's not some power hungry suitor, you know. You've charmed him completely. He cares for you.' He said more, but nothing I didn't already know or desired to face. Every word was just leading to the inevitable."
Marlene paused in her narrative as two guardsmen strolled by. They bowed to the princesses and received two strained smiles for their efforts. Once they were safely out of view, Marlene slumped against the wall as if drained. Emotionally, she was - sufficiently enough that Eries had to plead with her to continue.
"Finally, Father mentioned `his' proposal. I tried to put him off. I said I would think about it. He said the Duke was going back to Freid in a few days and I had no time. I asked why we couldn't let the Duke know when he was back home. Father claimed that wouldn't work. Freid was weak now. If we waited, the climate could change and they might no longer need us. So I sat up straight in my chair and in the boldest voice I could muster, I said, `Fine, you need your answer now? Your answer is no.' Father was not happy."
Eries knew how upset King Aston had been at her for merely not committing to help him. She could not imagine how furious he was at Marlene for actually defying his wishes.
"You know the dark quaver Father gets in his voice when he's angry but trying to pretend that he's calm? That's all I heard for the next five minutes. He demanded to know why. I said I didn't want to get married, that I wanted to stay in Asturia with my family. He explained that he understood, but at eighteen, I've already had more time with my family than most princesses got. Then he asked if I wanted to be with you all so much, why had I been hiding at the villa all summer. I didn't know how to answer him. Father was gracious enough to not press the point."
"If only he had dropped the topic of marriage so easily. He kept saying, `He's a good man. You get along well with him. You like him, yes?' And I said, `Yes, I like him, but I don't love him.' As soon as it was out of my mouth, I knew I had misspoken. Father's expression changed. It might have been the way I said the word `love', but Father was suddenly suspicious. `Love for your husband will come later, Marlene. But is there something about now that you wish to tell me? Is there another reason why you're refusing me?' Again, I couldn't speak. Father was so close to the truth."
A glimmer of understanding began to creep into Eries' mind. The truth would not have been good for anyone. Marlene might have been able to weather the fallout, but others would not be so lucky.
"I just stared at him. I tried to get out, `Whatever do you mean?' but my voice cracked so badly, it was as if I had just confirmed his suspicions. He drummed his fingers along his desk and spoke very deliberately, `You were so sullen the past year, but recently, I, no everyone, couldn't help but notice how much your mood has improved. I didn't question it before. I was happy enough just to have the old Marlene back. But now, I think I have to ask.' I couldn't believe how harsh he sounded. I didn't think it could get any worse, but what he asked me next... `So tell me, Marlene,' he said, `What exactly have you been doing at the villa when that guard of yours goes home?' Even if it was just in passing, the reference to Allen panicked me. I might be able to deny everything now, but if Father were distrustful enough, he would do a full-scale investigation into the matter. And when he found out...So I did the only thing I could think of."
"You said yes to get Father to back off," Eries supplied. "You let Allen go to protect him."
Marlene nodded. It was just as Eries had surmised. With her story told, Marlene resumed the soft crying of before, "Please, Eries if you can think of anything..."
Eries couldn't. She saw no way out of the situation as it was now. The Duke would be returning to Freid a few days hence with Marlene as his fiancée and nothing could stop it. Nothing logical. For a brief, terrifying moment, the notion that Marlene and Allen might run away together flickered across her thoughts, but Eries quickly squelched it. Allen might be foolish enough to try something so rash; Marlene would not be. Her decision to marry Duke Freid was based on the knowledge of the strength and scope of King Aston's grasp.
Her apologies were all Eries could give to her sister. Marlene accepted them with but a single request. "Now that you understand, could you please do me one more favor? I don't know where Allen is. I don't know what he's doing. I don't see a way for me to get away from the palace long enough to find him, especially with the engagement party tonight. You've always been so good at disappearing from these things. Do you think you could find him? Make sure that he's all right?"
"I'll do what I can."
"Please, Eries. Take care of him for me."
***
The palace staff had outdone themselves in preparing for the party to formally announce the engagement. Double shifts and a sizable expense account had resulted in a menagerie of ice sculptures, a small garden's worth of flowers and enough food to feed the entire country. A string quartet was situated in a corner of the hall, playing soft, traditional Asturian ballads. At the head of the hall were two chairs reserved for the groom and bride to be. Above the chairs, hung a portrait of the couple painted by one of Asturia's most renowned artists. The artist stood near his work offering up apologies for its hasty composition. Duke Freid and King Aston were with him assuring him not to worry. The engagement had come together rather quickly and the portrait was excellently done. Duke Freid seemed quite taken with it in fact. His gaze lingered on the painted Marlene and the warm smile the artist had given her. A smile that he very much wished to see on the face of the real
Marlene.
He was not going to get his wish tonight though. When Marlene entered the hall, she had the same polite but slightly distant expression that had become her mask. She proffered a gracious "thank you" to all that congratulated her and even gave out a few mannered laughs to the especially enthusiastic well-wishers. A good performance for her, really, but a mechanical one. If one looked close enough, they could see her good cheer wasn't reflected in her eyes. Her voice was measured, precise and her words never went beyond the usual clichés about marriage. If one was observant enough, they could come to the conclusion that Marlene wasn't happy at all.
Duke Freid watched Marlene work her way through the crowd. She was taking her time, talking to each and every guest, in what could be taken as an attempt to delay her arrival at his side. He made a second wish to be less astute about his fiancée's mood and then set about making his wish come true by quickly downing two glasses of vino in short succession.
Eries surveyed it all from her position outside the hall. Tonight was Marlene's night, so it would take longer than usual for the younger princesses to be announced. Eries couldn't care less but Millerna was getting restless. She was currently chatting away with a trio of handmaidens about how beautiful Marlene was and the general romance and glory of weddings. Eries envied her little sister's obliviousness for the moment even though she knew Millerna would be in for some rude awakenings as she got older.
The whole affair looked more like a theater production than a party. Marlene looked and acted like one of Millerna's porcelain dolls. Duke Freid was at the back at the hall trying very hard not to notice. The guests milled about like clueless extras while King Aston directed the evening. He had just given the signal for Eries and Millerna to enter.
Eries thought of her own directions. Enter two princesses. MIDDLE PRINCESS visibly disgruntled. YOUNGEST PRINCESS vibrant. CROWD quiets as PAGE announces them. Exeunt MIDDLE PRINCESS as she runs off to take care of things far more important than a stupid party for an arranged marriage.
As much as she wanted to run though, Eries played her role as she had been raised to do. She and Millerna joined the rest of the partygoers and the evening was officially underway. With a nod from King Aston, the string quartet began playing livelier music and the middle of the hall was cleared for dancing. By this time, Marlene had actually managed to make it over to Duke Freid. The crowd eyed them, waiting for them to take the floor, but all they got was an exchange of pleasantries.
They weren't the only ones who were disappointed. King Aston took his daughter aside and said a few things Eries couldn't make out, but she doubted it was warm, fatherly advice. Marlene and the King smiled throughout the entire conversation. The crowd though nothing of it, but Eries knew those expressions well. It was just another of those "friendly" chats with Aston had with his daughters when they weren't behaving quite the way they should at a public event.
Whatever King Aston said seemed to have worked. Marlene quickly returned to the Duke and led him off for a waltz. Eries was relieved. If Marlene couldn't get her act together, she would be in for more than a small lecture. And if King Aston ever found out why she was acting the way she was... The word scandal hardly covered the repercussions. And Eries knew damn well who the scapegoat for everything would be.
***
Somehow, after only an hour's worth of partying, over a third of the food and half the drink had been consumed. Eries hadn't eaten hardly any of it herself but nonetheless hung around the table holding the fruit platters. She absently poked at some sculpted melons while watching yet another dance wind down. Throughout the evening, her father had motioned for her to come over, but she remained where she was. People were staying away the healthier fare and the bitterness of the piscus seemed apropos.
Millerna, bounding about from guest to guest with joy for her sister, was more than making up for her lack of social grace anyway. And covering for Marlene as well. She had just begun a dance with her soon to be brother in-law. Eries had to admit it; it was an amusing site. The tall duke first crouched down, then bent over and then finally gave up and let the nine-year-old stand on his feet while he led them through the steps. The men laughed and the women cooed at the cuteness of it all. For Eries, it just reaffirmed her opinion of him. He was a good man - a good man trapped in a bad situation that he wasn't even aware of.
Marlene wasn't impressed. When she approached Eries, her face reverted to a sullen frown.
"I see you managed to find a hiding place as usual, Eries."
"Just waiting for the perfect moment to make my escape."
"One of these days, you'll have to teach me your trick," Marlene laughed nervously.
"I learned it from - " Eries said questioningly. Surely Marlene had told Allen how much she hated these parties too. Why hadn't he told her? "Never mind. If anyone asks, not that they ever do, tell them I felt ill and went back to my chambers."
"Of course. Eries, I don't mean to push you, but do you think you could leave soon? I need to know that Allen has someone with him. Is there anything I can do to help?"
"It's all about distraction, Marlene. If you took a dance with the Duke, I could announce my departure and no one would care."
"Okay, as soon as Millerna's through," Marlene said and then, for the first time in a year, she hugged Eries. Holding her close, she whispered into Eries' ear, "Thank you. For everything. I'm counting on you to watch over him."
She released Eries from the embrace, but took hold of her little sister's hands. Marlene didn't say anything more; she just looked at Eries, letting the love and faith she placed in her come through more meaningfully than the most poetic of words.
Then she was off. Marlene had a fiancée to dance with. Eries had a mission of her own.
***
Eries worked her way out of the crowd inconspicuously with her usual grace. She had skipped out on so many of these affairs, she had perfected the art. It bothered her more than she would admit that no one ever noticed she was gone. Or maybe they noticed and didn't care. She would never be mistaken for the life of the party. Either way, she was grateful for it tonight. Allen had a history of extreme reactions to losing the people he loved that had Eries scared as well as concerned.
Before she left the palace, she ducked into the laundry room and changed into a nondescript dress of a handmaiden. She stuffed her own ball gown among a large pile of sheets where, the next morning, it became the treasure of the wardrobe of the laundress who found it.
The fate of her gown was the last thing on Eries' mind. After her talk with Marlene, Eries had found Revius again to get the latest news on Allen. Apparently, Allen had pulled himself together enough to report for duty for the time it took for him to convince Lord Ramkin to give him a few days leave. He pleaded some problems with his familial estate that needed immediate attention. Revius assumed he had gone back to Tuvello's as soon as his request was granted. He certainly hadn't been seen around the palace afterwards.
Though the places she had to search had been narrowed down, Eries would have liked to have heard something different. Allen was now lying to his superiors to have more time to go to a bar. That was a bad, bad sign. She held out hope that Allen had gone back to the flat to brood instead, but when she reached the street on which Tuvello's was located, she headed straight for the tavern.
Allen was there all right, sitting at a table by himself with the exception of two barmaids that hovered around him offering up more liquor and other sundry favors. Eries shooed them away with a glare. Her expression did not change for Allen. Going by the large quantity of empty glasses on the table, he had to be drunk, but she couldn't tell how badly. Being dressed as he was in full uniform, he still looked like he had some composure.
That illusion was quickly dispelled when he tried to mimic her stern face and instead, wound up laughing so hard he nearly fell out of his chair. The barmaids rushed over to help but got within a foot of Eries and suddenly discovered another patron that needed assistance.
Eries tapped her fingers against the table. The anger she had felt towards Marlene was beginning to focus on someone else. She felt for Allen, she truly did, but this was not the way to make anything better. It was much more probable that it would make things worse.
"You could have at least changed out your uniform before coming here to make a display of yourself."
Allen dismissed her lecture. "Tuvello's is an old Caeli bar. It's tradition."
"The tradition is for Caeli to come here in their civilian clothing. I seem to remember Alucier saying something about `respect for the uniform'."
Allen shook his head no. "Do you have any idea what a pain in the ass it is to get in and out of this?" He tugged on the fabric that hung around his neck to illustrate. "This...pink...thing...alone takes forever."
"It's called a cravat, Allen." Eries leaned across the table and in one fluid motion, hooked her fingers under the offending neckwear, gave a yank and pulled the cravat off into her hand.
Allen was enthralled. "How did you - "
"Can we go now?"
"You can leave anytime you want."
"Oh, but I'm just a poor, helpless princess away from her palace. I'll need someone to escort me back." She had no intentions of taking him back to the palace, but she needed to say something to get him out of this bar.
"Nuh-uh. I'm not drunk enough to fall for that."
Eries sighed. "Fine, Allen. I'll just sit here while you have a few more and then ask you again in fifteen minutes when you will be. Or you can save us both some time by succumbing to the inevitable."
Allen considered for a minute. "That'll probably work."
"Good. You still have some sense about you."
But not much balance. When Allen stood, he swayed forward and had to grab the table to keep from falling. Eries got up to help him before the barmaids could. She put his right arm over her shoulders and held onto him as they maneuvered their way out of the bar. He leaned on her heavily, putting himself so close to her that under the smell of the alcohol on his breath, she could pick out the clean, faintly sweet scent of his hair and a deeper, spicier trace of the cologne he wore. She made a concerted effort not to think about the warmth of his body against hers.
Once they left the bar, Eries steered him towards the stairs that led to his flat. There was no way she was going to be able to help him up the narrow stairway.
And Allen wasn't about to make the trip on his own. "I thought we were going to the palace."
"Uh, we're making a minor detour."
"Oh."
At least he was an agreeable drunk. He seemed rather mellow in general. Mellow enough that Eries decided she could leave him alone to check to see if Revius was home yet. He would be better able to get him up the stairs than she was. She didn't see any light coming from the flat but she knew from Allen that it wasn't uncommon for Revius to turn in early. Of course, he only went to bed early when someone else went with him. Eries didn't want to interrupt (more for her own benefit than Revius') but she didn't see where she had much choice in the matter.
She propped Allen up against the wall and went up the steps. Behind her, she heard him slide promptly down the wall and hit the ground with an undignified thud.
Well, isn't this just too wonderful. My sister's a mess. My best friend is dead drunk. And I'm counting on Allen's sleazy roommate to be home with some tramp.
He wasn't. The door was locked; nobody answered her repeated knocks. Eries muttered a four-letter word that would have sent the court into hysterics, went back down the stairs and then muttered it again. In the whole minute she had been gone, Allen had gotten up and wandered back towards the bar.
"NO!" She said it forcefully enough that not only did he stop, so did several other people out in the street. The ones that kept moving looked a little guilty about it. "I meant him," she said as she went to collect Allen. Now everyone came to a stop; they wanted to see what was going on between the handmaiden and the Knight Caeli. In the most commanding voice she had learned in her fifteen years as a princess, Eries yelled, "GO HOME!"
They went, quickly too. Allen stayed where he was. The part of his brain that wasn't swimming in alcohol was emphatically telling him to listen to Eries *very* carefully. Right now, she was saying something about going upstairs and needing a key. There was another thing about Revius. He was coming home? No, he should be going home. No, wait. That was Eries. Eries was going to go home. And he was supposed to escort her. He thought.
"Come on, Princess. We should be heading back to the palace."
"Don't call me that and are you insane? You can't show your face there in the condition you're in. And you shouldn't be anywhere near that party anyway. Now, give me the key to your flat and somehow, I'll get you up those steps and home. You need to sleep this off."
"No, I'm fine. It's not safe for you to be out by yourself at night. I should walk you back."
"Not safe? I walked here, didn't I?!"
Allen wasn't in a state receptive to logic. He insisted on taking her back to palace and took her arm to lead her away. At first, she held her ground, but all that resulted in was him pulling her along. She finally relented with a growl of frustration.
Lovely. Chivalry isn't dead, it's just had a few.
***
"I can't believe how many steps there are in this stairwell. Are there more steps than there used to be?"
"Yes, Allen. We added several more floors to the palace since you were here this afternoon. Now keep moving." Eries tried not to snap at Allen, but he had been like this during the entire trip from Tuvello's. She had heard of angry drunks. She had heard of depressed drunks. She hadn't heard of whiny drunks.
"It just seems like there's more steps."
She gave him a push to motivate him forward. Instead, it caused him to trip on one of steps he had been complaining about. He was still coordinated enough to keep himself from falling, but the close call put an end to his climb. He sat down and then sprawled out across the steps.
"I'm going to rest for awhile," he announced.
"That can't be comfortable," Eries countered.
Allen yawned and settled in deeper for his impromptu nap. Eries sat down beside him. Things could be worse. She wasn't sure if it was Jichia or one of the lesser deities that was watching over her, but by some miracle she had gotten Allen all the way to the third floor without a major disaster. And considering she'd spent the last thirty minutes leading a noticeably wobbly Caeli through the bustling streets of Palas, she had earned a break of her own. It would give her time to think of what to do with Allen. He was hell-bent on seeing her to her bedroom door so he could be absolutely, positively sure she had made it in for the night safe and sound. Now, that door was but twenty feet away and she hadn't any clue what came next. She couldn't send him back out into the streets in the state he was in.
Five minutes. I just need five minutes to think. She had leaned back approximately one quarter of an inch when she heard the creak of the wooden door at the bottom of the stairwell. Somebody was coming.
"I'm really not that tired, Lord Ramkin. Father didn't have to send me to bed so early."
"I believe it's well past your regular bedtime as it is, Princess. Your father just wanted to make sure you weren't overtired for when you help your sister pack tomorrow. It`s going to be a big day for you and your sisters."
"Oh! I just remembered! Marlene said Eries was sick. I want to see if she'll be okay for tomorrow."
Eries assessed the situation. Lord Ramkin and Millerna were coming. Allen was supposed to off at his family estate taking care of legal matters. Allen was passed out at the top of the stairs *in uniform*. Eries was supposed to be sick in bed. Eries was dressed like a handmaiden and sitting by a passed out Caeli.
Eries' four-letter word of choice got its third usage for the night.
She didn't dare speak above a whisper. With its stone walls, every noise echoed through this stairwell, becoming louder and louder. She could every word that Millerna said as her little sister begged Lord Ramkin to let her stay up just a tiny bit longer, please?
With great care, Eries grabbed Allen's uniform where it fastened at the shoulder and began shaking him. "...wake up, allen...if you don't wake up this instant, lord ramkin is going to find you and he is going to want to know why you're here and why you reek of alcohol and why you're doing this all in your uniform...and in my most horrifying nightmare, i cannot imagine the explanation you'll blather out given how drunk you are...so you're going to wake up and we're going to find a nice place for you to hide...okay?...okay."
She hefted him up into a sitting position hoping that would bring him around. It did partially. He mumbled incoherently then moved to get comfy again.
"no, no, no, no, no, no, no...we need to get moving...come on, give me your arm and you can lean on me just like earlier and i'll help you up and we'll get you to my room and then...i'll come up with something."
Allen more or less complied or rather, didn't resist when Eries threw his arm across her shoulders and braced herself to pull him up. He didn't exactly help her with the actual effort of getting him standing, though.
"come on, come on...i can't carry you..."
Judging from the volume of their voices, Lord Ramkin and Millerna had reached the top of the first flight of stairs. Two more and Eries would have a lot of explaining to do. Desperate, Eries did the only thing she could think of - she kicked him. It had worked once with Maerzen anyway.
She discovered the fatal flaw of her plan when Allen yelled out an "oww" of protest. Two floors down, the voices of an old man and little girl asked, "what was that?" in unison.
Eries really had to haul it now.
With a yank that would cost her in back pain in the morning, she pulled Allen up. Twenty feet of forward motion and they would be in the clear. Again, she had to support him but he was groggier than he had been before and she had the additional task of dragging him along. It was extremely slow going.
Drag. Drag.
"Stay here, Princess. I'll check on ahead."
Take your time, Old Man Ramkin.
Drag. Drag.
"No, I wanna see! Hurry up!"
Shut up, Millerna.
Drag. Drag. Drag.
"Come on! I think it came from close to Eries' room!"
No it didn't. Go away.
Drag. Drag. Door. She had to open the door. She had to keep hold of Allen or he'd fall. She leaned enough so that Allen would be propped up against her, allowing her to have one her hands free.
The door opened just as steps echoed up from halfway up the second set of stairs. In in graceful maneuver that she would never be able to replicate in a million tries, she flung open the door, shoved Allen through it, followed him into the room, caught him and gently eased him to the floor. It would have been perfect if she had been able to shut the door.
"Princess Eries?" Lord Ramkin called. The mystery sound paired with the suspiciously ajar door to her room must have alarmed him. His pace quickened.
Eries reached out with her foot and managed to catch the edge of the door. Another kick and the door swung shut on Lord Ramkin's face hard enough to cause the elder knight to utter a curse under his breath. Eries lunged for the lock before he had time to recover.
"Princess Eries?" he called again.
"Could you give me a moment? I, uh...I'm not quite properly dressed." It was embarrassing, but it would keep Lord Ramkin out of her room until she gave him permission to enter.
"Is that Lord Ramkin?" Allen asked sleepily as he came back to life.
"Now you're fully awake. Hurry up. We've got a minute at the most."
In a rush, Allen opened the windows while Eries mussed the bed sheets to make it look as if she had been recently sleeping. She put a robe on over her handmaiden's dress and directed Allen to stow away in the bathroom. He was looking a trifle green. The bathroom would have been the best place for him even if he didn't need to hide.
After everything was set, Eries let Lord Ramkin in with Millerna trailing right behind him. "Is something wrong?" she asked innocently.
"I'm sorry to disturb you, Princess, but I heard a strange noise and I saw your door was open. I was concerned for your safety."
"Noise? I didn't hear anything. As for the door, I was feeling feverish. I opened the windows to try to get a breeze in but the air wasn't stirring. I opened to door for better ventilation. That got the air flowing. Too much, I guess. My apologies."
"No need to, your majesty. I'm just relieved you're all right."
Millerna wasn't so sure she was. She kept asking Eries questions about her fever and quizzing her on symptoms.
"You're not a doctor yet, Millerna. Now off to bed with you. We both need our sleep."
Eries flopped to her bed in complete exhaustion as soon as they were safely gone. From the bathroom, Allen praised her performance. "Wow. You're good."
"I thought the part about the windows and the open door sound too much like an explanation."
"Lord Ramkin bought it." As an afterthought, "He's kind of gullible that way."
"Is that why he fell for your ridiculous `estate legal matters' excuse? You settled that estate in the spring. And will you please come out of the bathroom? I feel like I'm shouting. We've already avoided one disaster. I really don't want to attract another."
"Umm, I think it might be a good idea if I stayed in here for awhile. I'm not feeling so good..."
Eries covered her head with one of the numerous decorative pillows that took up the top half of the bed. She didn't want to listen to the details. After a few minutes, she felt the bed dip as Allen seated himself on the corner. His presence there reminded her of a dream she had last month, one of those dreams in which everything is so tangible and vivid that, upon waking, seems more memory than fancy. Except Eries was dead certain the events of that dream had never taken place and, with Allen a few inches away from her, she wished fervently that the dream itself had never occurred. From under her pillow, her cheeks burned red.
"It's not like he knew."
"What?"
"Lord Ramkin. It's not like he knew that I already settled the estate."
"You never told him?"
"I don't play well with other males, remember?"
"Hmm. I didn't know you listened so well." Heartened by Allen's recall of her past advice, Eries found the strength to cast the pillow aside. Allen was closer to her than she had thought. When she sat up, they were shoulder to shoulder. Eries missed her pillow already.
Okay. Breathe. Talk about something. Do anything but think about *that*. "You'll have to go back on duty eventually." That was as benign as she could get.
"I know. But not now. When does Marlene leave anyway?"
"Day after tomorrow."
"8^th moon." Allen slumped forward, putting his head in his hands. "Of course it would be 8^th moon. That's how my life works."
So he was a depressed drunk after all. Eries asked in confusion, "What's the significance of 8^th moon?"
"Her birthday. Celena's birthday. She'll be ten. That's sort of a big one, isn't it? Crossing into the double digits?"
He thinks she's still alive out there? Eries wasn't going to touch that. In two days, Marlene would be gone from his life forever. Robbing him of the hope that one day he might actually get back one of his lost loved ones would have been cruel. "You shouldn't be alone then, Allen. I don't think your sister would want you suffering in solitude on her special day, do you?"
"I'm Marlene's guard, Eries. If I go back on duty, I would be required to escort her to the Duke's leviship and hand her over to his protection. It's all perfectly symbolic and ironic in a twisted, sick, nasty way and I cannot deal with it."
"So you're not going see her again. You'll just let things lie as they are?"
"I don't see what choice I have."
"Neither did she. She's not marrying Duke Freid by choice, you know. There are...extenuating circumstances. You should let her explain." Eries wasn't sure if she should be telling him this. She had done more than enough for Allen and Marlene's relationship. And yet, now that it was all but over, despite her feelings, despite the possible consequences, she was still urging Allen to see her sister one last time. "You've already lost a lot of people that you care about. At least with Marlene you have a chance to resolve things, to say goodbye."
Closure. That was the word she was looking for. It was something he had never gotten with anyone else. His father left as if he was going on a routine expedition, his sister vanished into nothingness and his mother had fallen ill so suddenly. Perhaps that was part of the reason he dwelled on them so.
"Allen?"
"Hmm?"
"You'll think about it, won't you?"
"Mmm..."
"I thought I was the reticent one."
"Is that your fancy way of rephrasing you're the 'Quiet One'?"
"I suppose I prefer quiet to some of the other adjectives I've heard used."
"Like what? The Moody One?"
"That's Marlene."
"If you say so. The Sarcastic One?"
"Alas, I seldom show that side to the palace rabble."
"The One Who Kicks Really Damn Hard?"
"That was a desperate measure!"
"Riiiight. I talk to Alucier. He tells me how you abuse him."
"Allen!" An indignant cry from her wasn't about to stop his laughter. Knowing it would only give credence to his teasing, and therefore, make him laugh harder, she gave him a light shove on the shoulder. Happy drunk was a marked improvement over whiny or depressed drunk.
He laughed for another minute, a giddy, dreaming sort of laugh that was always fleeting, but nonetheless comforting. Eries was sad to hear it end. Especially since he resumed his questioning.
"So what do they call you?"
"You've had to have heard people talking about me around the palace."
"I spent most of my on duty hours at the villa."
"Are you really going to make me say it?"
Allen nodded. He was going to make her say it.
"Words that occur frequently are odd, cold, plain...must I go on?"
"Plain?"
"Plain as in plain boring. Or plain as in plain looking."
"Really?" Allen was dubious. "I always thought you had this regal, exotic air about you."
"Really?" It was Eries' turn to doubt.
"Don't tell Marlene this," he said, his voice going low, "But you're one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen." He wavered for a moment, almost giggling to himself. "On second thought, tell her. And be really pissy about it."
"Allen..."
He had said much the same thing in her dream. That and other things she couldn't hope to hear now. Things she shouldn't technically want to hear now, but surfaced in her thoughts anyhow. Her feverish feelings were no longer pretext.
He turned towards her, leaned close to her until she was lost in a sea of sapphire as his eyes held hers. She breathed in the aroma of vino.
"Allen, you don't have to flatter me," she said timidly.
He placed one hand one her shoulder as she felt the other touch lightly on her cheek. It kept her still as he pronounced, in all earnestness, "By the gods, Eries...you are beautiful."
And then, Allen Crusade Schezar VIII, Knight Caeli and the everything of Eries Aston's heart and soul, passed out and fell into her lap.
"Oh."
***
Author's Notes - This is getting ridiculous. I fully expected this chapter to be short and breezy and it turned out to be another monster. I don't even have Alucier around to blame... Anyway, I'm giving you fair warning. Considering the ground I want to cover, I'm thinking the next chapter's going to be a big sucker that might take awhile to get out. Of course, given how far off I've been in estimating chapter length, one of two things will probably happen: I'll wind up with the sequel to Infinite Jest (uh, a really, really, really big, damn, long novel for the less literary pretentious out there) or it'll consist of six words and a period. Eh, we'll see.
Next up - Girl and Boy vs. Life. And - because he seems to have gotten himself a fan club - yes, Alucier (or Maerzen, whatever you want to call him) is baaaaack.