This wasn't turning out the way Patchouli wanted. If she could be totally frank with herself, Adam was nowhere near expectation, he was in a league all his own. It was hard to classify him, especially within the parameters that were set by Flandre's mistreatment of her other companions that didn't resemble her dinosaur toys. Patchouli may have been glad that Adam retained many reptilian traits, certainly enough to charm Flandre, but the real problem was how fussy the little beast was being since Alice left for home.

To express the turmoil in simple vernacular, Adam has been venting his feelings of abandonment on everything around him, inanimate or otherwise. What really confused Patchouli was how nasty he was being to Koakuma. While reluctant, the devil had accepted the role of surrogate for Adam, who clearly had only Alice's love on his mind.

In summary, he wasn't working out at all.

"Lady Patchouli, there's something I need to talk to you about."

The sound of Koakuma's voice snapped the magician out of her reverie. "What is it, Koa? I'm busy with..." she trailed off, realizing that there was nothing on her table worth making an excuse over. "Never mind that, speak quickly before Adam finds another book to rip up."

"There's something about him, Patchouli," Koakuma planted her hands on Patchouli's table as she spoke. "I knew there was something wicked about that little beast, and seeing how much he's changed has finally offered some clarity." She glanced aside, making sure the little homonculus wasn't near. "I don't think Alice rightly knew what she was doing when she made him."

"I've had a suspicion, given how attached she was, but that doesn't explain-"

"That was foul magic and you know it, and I don't think it's finished with that dragon you had China drag in here," Koakuma spoke fast, like she needed to get it out now or risk Adam overhearing them.

"One: don't interrupt me again," Patchouli snipped, flicking Koakuma on the nose and earning a wounded squeak from the devil. "Two: what makes you an expert on Alice's magic all of a sudden?"

"Oh don't pretend you don't see it too," Koakuma retorted tartly. "If I can see it an expert like you can see that whatever magicks Alice called on that day are still having their way with Adam's body. I don't think this growth-spurt is the last thing we'll see."

The pale magician had to applaud her familiar for gathering all that on her own, but that still lead to one question. "What do you think Adam will turn into then?"

The devil furrowed her brow, "haven't thought of it," she said with a plaintive shrug. "Could... maybe he'll turn back?" she offered.

Patchouli paled, if that was possible. "Something more realistic please," she said with a cough.

Koakuma puzzled briefly. "Well he went from a toddler to a young boy. Maybe he'll turn into a man?"

Patchouli gave Koakuma a deadpan look, "is that hope or fear that drives that theory?"

Koakuma couldn't help a groan, "I don't do that anymore. As I recall I was forcibly retired to be a certain someone's familiar."

"Indeed," the pale magician said with an amused huff.

"We just need to keep an eye on him," Koakuma said. "He's been unruly, sure, but I'm more worried about how growing up is going to affect his noggin."

"On that note, where exactly did you leave Adam again?" Patchouli prodded, resting her chin on her knuckles.

Koakuma shrugged, "I left him with-" a loud crash and a sudden shake shattered that sentence. Both girls hurried toward the entrance of the library. Leaning against a bookshelf was an unconscious Meiling, and lying on top of a shattered table was the broken remains of a crystal chandelier. Koakuma looked up, and hanging from the ceiling chain looking bitter as usual was Adam.

"Look at those marks!" Patchouli said in awe, which quickly evolved into rage, "he's ripping up the ceiling, my ceiling!" She pulled her hair at the sight of the Sistine ceiling horribly marred by several trails of monstrous claw marks. The faces of angels were twisted, and the perfect skies were blotted out by deeply carved scars and punctures. "Do you have any idea how much I paid for that?!" Patchouli shrieked, her voice cracking.

Koakuma took off, flying above to try and wrangle the unruly homonculus, and the moment she got within range Adam pounced. Koakuma was snatched up in a vice and the two bounced off a shelf and went tumbling down. The devil managed to get on top of Adam the moment they hit the ground, and the little black demon was forced to take the brunt of the fall. He let out a bark as the wind was knocked out of him, and Koakuma scrambled away to put some distance between them. Adam recovered quickly, resolving to scurry up a bookshelf for safety. Whenever he spotted Koakuma, he'd hiss and bark at her, gnashing his teeth in a defensive display.

Patchouli meanwhile was trying to wake up Meiling, but no matter what she did the chinagirl would not join everyone else in the waking world. "What did he do to you?!" the magician cried, trying to spot any sign of Adam's madness. No marks on her neck, no knots on her head. It's like she just decided to take a nap while Adam made a mess of the place!

"What the hell is going on in here?!"

Everything stopped. Patchouli stopped trying to slap Meiling awake, Koakuma hid the gun she just got out under a rug, and Adam remained on top of his bookshelf perch. Stomping in with a temper to match the shaking floor was the mistress of the mansion herself, Remilia Scarlet. Closely following her was Sakuya wrapped snugly in a blanket, drenched and shivering like mad.

The Scarlet Devil scanned the library, her ire slowly replaced with exasperation the longer she took everything in. Patchouli looking like she was beating Meiling into submission, and Koakuma was trying to cram a musket under a blanket and have it look convincing. "Say, Sakuya," she said, leaning aside and toward the shivering maid. "Did I drink too much today? You know how bad I am with wine."

"N-no mistress," Sakuya said, trying to rein in her shivering. "You haven't had a drink of al-ah-ah!" she quickly buried her face in her blanket and let out a small squeak of a sneeze. Remilia blushed, trying not to comment.

"A-anyway," the vampire said, quickly recomposing. "Dare I ask what the cause of all this racket is?"

Patchouli and Koakuma looked at each other, and they both pointed up, toward Adam's bookshelf perch. He was peeking over the edge, watching from afar. The moment Remila made eye contact with him he hissed.

"Cheeky little viper," the Scarlet Devil flashed a fang at him. He responded with protruding the jagged bone plates that made up his jaws past his lips. "Now that's a set of chompers if I ever saw one. Come down here! Introduce yourself to your new mistress!"

Adam ducked out of view.

Remilia puffed her cheeks, making an annoyed sound. "Sakuya, he's not acknowledging me," she pouted. "Do something about it."

"Right away mistress." With as much fanfare as possible Sakuya kind of bobbed into the air. She didn't float or glide, that would imply finesse, no she swayed and bobbed the whole trip up to Adam's perch, letting out squeaky sneezes and sniffling the whole way. Patchouli and Koakuma braced themselves for the worst, expecting another random attack from the mansion's new troublemaker. Sakuya made a shaky landing on the shelf, and her quarry was but a few meters away. She tried to put on her most stern face and mustered some words. "Now listen here, mister," she tried to sound stern, but it came out congested and utterly lethargic. "You're going to go down there and present yourself to the mistress forthwith."

Adam stared at Sakuya with saucer eyes, his expression one of bewilderment.

"Go on," the maid said, turning aside to sneeze again. "Hop to it young man."

The homonculus peered down his perch, looking at the waiting Remilia. He looked to Sakuya, who managed to pull off the stern face even if her nose was running. The young beast capitulated with a neutered "kay..." and slowly made his descent.

Koakuma slapped herself. "In one minute she does..." she groaned bitterly. "Screw this, I'm going to bed."

Patchouli was equally bewildered, even as she watched Koakuma leave. "H-how did she do that? He just... rolled over because she said so."

Remilia flapped her wings, bristling with pride. "Obviously she's the only one who knows the meaning of discipline around here," she said proudly. "I'd expect nothing less than a perfect performance from Sakuya, even in such a weakened state." The vampire positively glowed when Adam stood before her, Sakuya close behind him.

"State your name," Sakuya rasped, her voice faltering a tad.

Adam peered over his shoulder, his face one of protest. Sakuya's tired glare made him return his gaze to Remilia. He furrowed his brow, concentrating as much as he could. "Ah... my name..." he paused, then poked himself in the chest. "Adam."

Remilia curtsied, not missing a beat. "Remilia Scarlet, lady of the Scarlet Mansion," she flashed a toothy grin at the homonculus. "And your new mistress."

The black thing blinked slowly, scratching his throat. "Mistress," he parroted.

Sakuya freed her arm from her blanket, patting the homonculus on the head. "Well-done." He tensed on contact, but immediately relaxed, looking rather content to get some affection.

"Welcome to the Scarlet Devil Mansion, little beast," Remilia said. "I'm guessing you like to eat meat, given those teeth of yours."

Adam nodded.

"How about we have some pork? Our chef is a master at preparing it," Remilia offered. "Dinner's a lovely chance to get to know more about our new addition." Before Adam could even think about what pork was, the vampire turned on her heel and made her way for the exit. Sakuya stood by Adam, offering him a hand. He took it without hesitation, holding on tight as he and was lead out of the library by the maid, leaving Patchouli behind.

"What just happened?!" the magician shouted.

"Hey don't be so loud, I'm trying to sleep," Meiling drawled, shifting against her headrest.

Patchouli promptly kicked her.

=][=

The walk to the dining hall was a long one, Adam insisted on stopping at every window so he could stare out of it for a while. Sakuya, being in no shape to fight the homonculus in this, was forced to allow the random digressions from the beaten path. Remilia didn't seem to mind too much, far too curious about the mansion's latest addition to worry about timeliness.

"What can you tell me about yourself?" Remilia suddenly asked as the trio rounded a corner and found themselves walking through yet another long hallway. Thankfully no windows this time.

Adam didn't respond until Sakuya snapped her fingers in front of his face. He blinked a few times, coming out of a daze. "Uh..." he said as he grasped the air for words. "Name..."

"I know your name," Remilia said, snapping Adam out of his thoughts. "But who is Adam?"

Adam furrowed his brow, searching his memories. "Hom... homunculus," he drawled as slowly as possible, sounding out each syllable from memory.

Remilia huffed, slightly amused by his struggles to answer her queries. "It's a start," she said. "So I'm given to understand that you have some of Alice's blood in you. How does it feel being part magician?"

"Mama..." Adam glowered, his pace faltering. It was resumed by Sakuya's insistent tug, pulling him back to reality. "Alice is mama."

"And what of Patchouli? I heard she gave blood too." Adam's snarl at the mention absolutely tickled Remilia. "No love lost for our little magician?" she prodded. Adam's silence tickled her just as much as his snarl did.

Adam wasn't really in the mood for answering questions after that, so Remilia and Sakuya had some brief backs and forths until they arrived at the dining hall. The table was already prepped, the several fairy maids waiting on the flanks of the room, eager to serve. Adam tried stopping to talk to one, but Sakuya ushered him to a seat next to Remilia's. He made some protests, but complied regardless.

"Do you know why you're here, Adam?" Remilia asked, lacing her fingers together and resting her chin on them.

Adam blinked slowly, pondering the query deeply. He felt a nagging in the back of his head, it felt like something was scratching around in there. "Invited," he drawled, going into a bit of a daze as the puzzled. "Brought by... yellow..." he trailed off as he tried to remember the woman's face. He did remember one thing though. "Nine... tails..."

Remilia quirked a brow, listening as Adam struggled to recall his being invited to the mansion. She looked at Sakuya, "I was under the impression he was born in the library," she whispered.

Sakuya looked to Adam, equally curious. "Who invited you, exactly?"

"Ninetail," the black child muttered, barely loud enough to hear. "Ran."

"Ran where?" Sakuya asked, wiping her nose with her handkerchief.

Adam shook his head dizzily. "Name," he says, resting his face on the table. "Head hurts..." he whined, rocking back and forth over the tabletop.

"Do we know a Ran?" Remilia asked Sakuya, watching Adam rub his head in discomfort. This didn't look like just a headache. "Are you okay, Adam?"

"I do," Sakuya said, making her way to Adam's side. She placed a hand on his face, gently stroking his cheek as he let out a small hiss. She shushed him softly, "I know it hurts."

"Lady... hole in sky... Rei..." Adam whined. "Gen... so..." He blinked a few times, his brow relaxing. He let out a small sigh, sounding rather tired. "Pork," he said out of the blue.

Remilia snapped her finger, keeping her gaze on Adam. "You heard the boy. Long pork."

As the maids hurried off, Sakuya offered Remilia a concerned look as she wiped her nose. "He makes it sound like he's from the outside."

"He makes it look like someone doesn't want him remembering," Remilia said, indifferent to Adam's still being right next to them. "Talk to Patchouli, find out more."

Sakuya bowed and hurried off, leaving Remilia with the little homunculus. She gave him a curious once over, her brow furrowed. "Where are you from, Adam?"

Adam's gaze drifted about, finding the dining hall suddenly very interesting. "Home," he said simply. "With mama."

"Alice?" the Scarlet Devil asked as the fairy maids filtered back into the dining hall, bringing with them plates filled to the brim with hot food. The conversation quickly ended, as Adam started squirming in his seat and clapping excitedly. The sight was rather cute, in its own infantile sort of way.

It reminded her of when she'd have dinner with-

Remilia shook her head, dismissing that train of thought. She looked at her plate, licking her lips. "No use talking while-" Remilia blinked as Adam crawled onto the table and started mauling the contents of his plate, stuffing his face full of meat and roughage. Remilia scooted away as food and slobber flew across the table, watching in a kind of morbid fascination. Even the maids stopped everything they were doing to watch this tiny beast to match his bodyweight in food. "Get more," Remilia commanded the stunned maids, pushing her helping toward Adam. The homunculus stopped, his head snapping toward Remilia's plate. He greedily snatched it up and brought it into his face, renewing the sloppy horror. The vampire scooted away a tad more for good measure, staring at Adam like a deer caught in high-beams.

"My lady I-... I..." Sakuya immediately trailed off, stopping in the doorway. Peeking around from behind her was Patchouli, who immediately conjured her quill and notepad when she registered the sight before her.

Remilia looked to the two with helplessness painted on her face, a shrug ultimately inadequate for the situation. Slowly, as if not to startle the feasting beast, she got off her seat and tiptoed toward Sakuya and Patchouli. "Look at that," she said, gesturing over her shoulder. "At the risk of being a fool, has he ever eaten before?"

"Alice mentioned that he's not much for eating," Patchouli said, still frantically scribbling notes. "This implies otherwise."

The trio returned their collective attention to Adam. The maids had resolved to ship him his meals on a cart, gathering a few meters away and slowly pushing it toward Adam with a long pole. The moment Adam noticed the cart he leaped off the table and tackled it. The maids dispersed like a flock of birds, screaming and hurrying off while Adam continued to stuff his face.

"I find myself somewhat terrified," Patchouli stated flatly.

"Should I have them get more?" Remilia asked hesitantly.

"I wouldn't," Sakuya said, "at this rate he might try eating the fairies."

Patchouli paused, drinking in the domestic carnage that was Adam's table manners. "That... wouldn't be the first time."

Remilia and Sakuya both looked at the pale magician. "What do you mean?" Remilia asked, gesturing to Adam. "What is he?"

"A crocodylomorpha homonculus, to be specific," Patchouli said. "There was a massive crocodile living in the lake, it was the perfect candidate to be Adam's base. It had survived a battle with Marisa, and who I can only assume is Mokou. Proven resilience - everything we needed to make Flandre's companion a reality."

"He's not going to Flandre anymore," Remilia said, watching as Adam helped himself to the last of the scraps. "He's mine now."

Patchouli blinked at Remilia. "What do you mean? I thought-"

"Flandre lost the right to him when she spurned me. Adam belongs to me now," the Scarlet Devil reiterated, looking at Patchouli pointedly. "Is that a problem?"

The pale magician sputtered helplessly, but finally shook her head. "Of course not, my lady."

"Sakuya, I want his measurements taken and I want something appropriate made up for him. Something with a cravat," Remilia smirked, imagining that rowdy little thing in a suit.

The head maid bowed. "Of course, my lady. Should I prepare a room for him?"

Remilia waved her hand dismissively. "No need, the foot of my bed should be enough. I expect you'll be able to coach him in the finer things of a noble life?"

Sakuya sneezed, sniffling loudly. "I can do that, mistress," she said, still horribly congested.

"You'll do well," Remilia said confidently, neither party realizing that Patchouli had taken her leave mere moments ago.

=][=

The pale magician stood outside of the sealed door to Flandre's room. Remilia had forbidden casual visits, but Patchouli's conscience bade that she visit, to bring Flandre the ill-tidings that Remilia was likely more than happy to keep from her younger sister. She sucked in a shallow breath before she knocked, making sure to do it to the tune of "shave and a haircut" to inform Flandre it was a friend.

"China?" a voice called from the other side. "Is that-" the door creaked open, revealing Flandre herself. Her face glowed when she realized who it was, and within seconds the little vampire was bouncing where she stood. "Patchouli!" she chirped excitedly. "Are they here? Are they here?"

Patchouli swallowed a lump that felt like a stone as it went down. "May I come in, Flandre?" she asked. "I'd rather tell you this in private."

Flandre nodded happily, stepping aside and opening the door to make way for Patchouli. All throughout Flandre's room there were drawings of various things, creatures and people that the magician didn't recognize. "I can't wait to see what they look like! I bet it beats all my ideas!"

Patchouli nearly choked on the second lump that formed in her throat, barely managing to swallow it. "About that-"

"I'm so excited to meet them!" Flandre gushed. "After so many months I was starting to get worried I'd never meet them! What's their name?"

Patchouli couldn't bring herself to answer, instead kneeling down to Flandre's level. "Flandre I have some... bad news. I think you deserve to know."

Flandre's glow immediately died, her smile snapping into a terrified grimace. "Why?" she asked. "Why can't anything go right?" The question gave Patchouli pause, which was just enough time for the Scarlet Sister to find her words once more. "I trusted you!" she snapped. "I thought you of all people would live up to your word! Why didn't you?!"

"Your sister-" Patchouli instantly regret her impulse answer, for what came next was almost too much.

"Again?!" Flandre screeched, "why can't she let me be happy?! Why can't I have something, no, someone to make me happy?! Why does she always have to take everything from me?!" Fresh tears began running down her soft cheeks, her eyes now doubly red. "How could you let her?"

"He was your sister's idea," Patchouli admit. "I was just following her orders."

Flandre's wings went limp, slapping against the floor pathetically, the shimmering crystals dimming and their vibrant shades turning dilapidated. "Why is everyone doing this to me?" she whimpered. "What did I do wrong?"

"Flandre-" Patchouli let out a pathetic yelp when the tip of Lævateinn rested squarely between her eyes.

"I'm done," Flandre said, her voice jarringly composed. "Everyone lies to me, everyone tries to hurt me, everyone wants to take what makes me happy." She lowered her spear, looking at Patchouli with a hollow gaze. "Go, you obviously care more about my sister than me."

Defeated, Patchouli turned to leave. Her pace was slow, and the magician fully realized just how horrible this was. The honest are never rewarded, she should have just kept quiet, hope that Flandre would forget about all this nonsense.

"What's he like?"

The pale magician paused mid-step. "What do you mean?"

"You made him, right? What's he like?" Flandre asked.

Patchouli's shoulders slumped, and she sighed. As much as it damned her, she had just enough honesty left in her to answer this question. "He's a hellion, a little troublemaker, and a slob when it comes to eating," she said. "You would have loved him."

Flandre's silence spurred Patchouli's retreat. As she closed the door behind her, she let out a great sigh.

"I've been making too many stupid decisions lately."