I've enjoyed doing nothing but immediate bonding of twin sisters long separated from birth. :) One of the most important factors at the heart of this story.

Chapter Nine

Lacrymosa

Leaving his Meg behind was always a burden to him whenever Carl was called away to discuss the latest grant funding for the school, as well as the most recent development – including a demonstration of the laser surgical drill with Alan by his side. The old fool who had once been his school friend and colleague – Gruber, namely his theories on the will of the brain – down, and that meant another step in this, by which the lobotomy drill would soon come in. Progress so far was nothing short of perfect, but the device needed a subject who would be the absolution.

That would have to wait, given he was in no hurry to achieve the glory, thanks to the dainty one by his side, whose smaller hand was held in his as he escorted her to the cafe, was the most of his worries. It was always her above everything else and hadn't changed a bit. Megan's presence and appearance rendered him to a point where he would sometimes lose track of his speech, but in class given he recited the lecture to himself countless times, he made an exception in managing both watching her in the class and teaching together. Right now, since today was their last day together until Friday, there was so much Carl planned to say to her that had been bottled up for so long, but he also had to tread carefully because he did not miss how she would manage an awkward smile and shy away from him. Carl was not deceived; Meg was afraid of him. She was afraid of him, but it fueled his desire more.

The dress was soft and flowing about her impeccable body, baring her long, pale legs and arms, the neck low enough to show the curves he only saw touching in his dreams at night. Pink and lovely, she was more and more of a woman now than the very first day of meeting. Carl could not take his eyes off her; he never could. How could anyone avoid looking at this precious creature beside him? Her hair had once been long and thick, cascading over her shoulders before she turned sixteen and decided to cut it to the way it was now, keeping it that way ever since. It had angered Carl, but he kept it to himself because he simply did not want to frighten her. He'd been there when she had it done at the salon; when no one was looking, he'd gathered a few strands of her hair mostly because he wanted to always have a sample of that silken hair and wrapped in ribbon to keep it together. The smell of her remained; he could never get enough of her cool, sweet perfume when she stood near him.

Carl allowed her to take a seat first across from him. In the middle of September, the weather was freezing, but it was a good thing Megan wore her favorite coat while they sat outdoors; he'd wanted this for her, after all. He was still old-fashioned in the sense of lavishing the girl to win her over, but Meg was far from feeling what he felt for her; she never spoke to him about it directly, but he could smell it radiating off her. It angered him and broke his heart to know that, but perhaps in time, after they were married, she might grow to love him.

"Meg," he started as he sat down in his seat across from her, shrugging off his jacket and draping it behind him on the chair, "I realize we never had much time together ever since you got into school."

She shrugged. "Well, we knew it would be like that. Not much time together outside class, I mean."

"Indeed." He detected hesitation in her voice and leaned forward. "But please let's take the time today to talk before I leave with your father tomorrow." Her eyes – wide and blue as the skies – were eyeing him as though she suspected something she wasn't going to like. Her hands were in front of her on the table, clasped together but not tight enough for the knuckles to turn white, but for her palms to start sweating. Carl sighed and reached out to lay his hand on top of hers; she visibly stiffened at the contact. "Meg, we're getting married as soon as you graduate, but please, don't be afraid. I know this has all been very difficult for you, and I won't pretend not to. I only want the best for you. I don't want you afraid of me or anything else."

She opened her mouth, ready to respond to him when the waiter arrived then to ask them what they would want.

~o~

This was not the strong, pure version of his re-agent in his hand; Herbert surveyed it as he sat in his room, his whole body quaking with prescience. No, he made another version, a weaker one not long after returning to Arkham with Katherine. Perspiration was coating his forehead and no doubt moving to all parts of his body. He was feeling the pound in his head, telling him that he needed to take this soon before he lost it altogether. Herbert had unbuttoned the cuff of his left shirt sleeve and rolled it above his elbow so said part was bared for the small dosage in the needle. His heart was pounding; if he didn't hurry, he would collapse, and Dean Halsey would surely find out and the consequences were dire. He would wish he'd have listened to his cousin in the beginning.

The dreams flashing back to Hans' death and failed re-animation had followed him when he moved in with Crawford and Katherine, and by then he decided enough was enough. He considered rapid eye movement sleep with Katherine's help, but then again, the person was likely to dream while in that stage, and he'd panicked that the nightmares would happen again, and he'd be rendered defenseless. Release of negative energy? Bah again. He'd found a better way to keep himself from dreaming of Gruber's death.

He did not include the main element of the re-agent, delivering a lesser force through the body. Herbert had decided a small dose on himself given he knew the risks of an overload, and this was all it took. He needed this because it kept him awake and his mind alert; there was too much work to do to sleep. Herbert managed without difficulty, and there were few times he needed the substance; his reminders were if he ever started feeling the pang to the head, most of the time being during the evening. Daylight was rare, like today. The moment the verdant solution set its course through his arm and shot with great speed throughout the rest of his body, an indescribable feeling of indulgance set him afire; Herbert was on the verge of letting out his hisses of satisfaction. He had to be careful so Halsey wouldn't hear – or Meg, his unwillingly engaged princess.

Whose vivid sapphire eyes and rosy lips, all set in a captivating face, suddenly entered his mind in the midst of the aftermath of his frenzy.

Herbert's body subsided with the spasms of his muscles – namely the ones down below, in the regions of his pants – when he finally forced himself to sit up, gritting his teeth together at the unexpected image of Meg on his mind. For God's sake, he was interested in finding a way to get her trust, gain access to a human subject, not like this. No changes in the animals he still smuggled into the basement, and he had no other choice but to at least attempt a way to first get her to believe in his work. Her father would be gone tomorrow, which meant he had all week with his daughter and that infernal black beast of hers.

Herbert managed a smile when he thought of Rufus.

~o~

It was Monday now, and Katherine couldn't be anymore excited meeting her sister here to finally catch up – and tell her the story of their parents. She knew Meg wouldn't take it well, but then again, when her own mother first told her, she didn't either, but in the end it was Alan Halsey's fault. He kept them separated, didn't bother contacting her and Erin for so many years, didn't acknowledge Katherine as his daughter when she got into Miskatonic under him...and most of all, kept the twins separated the whole time there.

She sat at one of the tables beside one of the windows, wearing a creamy sweater and printed brown skirt as well as the necklace from Crawford, looking outside the whole time, having told the waitress she was waiting for someone to arrive, and when said person finally did, she just about jumped up and hurried over to greet her. "Meg, you came!" Her twin was in a bright red blouse and dark blue jeans, face set in a mask of ambiguity, the whole time she sat down across from Katherine, not once taking her eyes – the same clear crystal blue as her own – off her face.

"I almost didn't," Megan answered finally. "Daddy and Carl are gone until Friday, so I thought today sooner than later."

Katherine nodded. "Yeah. So you still haven't told him about finally meeting your...long-separated sister?" she asked hesitantly, causing the other woman to stiffen slightly. For the sake of it, her eyes fell on the black pearl and blue tanzantine ring around Meg's finger, telling her she was in one of the rarest engagements of America's time of the present, and it wasn't of her own will. And Katherine believed marriage was of someone's own will, not some burden and duty.

Meg exhaled softly. "Of course I didn't. How could I? He's the only family I have left – well," she added sheepishly, "he was, before I met you." She leaned forward. "How come he lied to me about this? I was raised an only child, and yet I recently find out I have a biological, identical twin who happens to be the great Dr. McMichaels." Katherine couldn't help but laugh at the compliment. She turned around and called for the waitress again for the refreshments now, and saying they were ready for ordering now. Nothing too fussy, of course. Both of them had the homemade soup of the day and a veggie sandwich, and Meg had to be back at the hospital in a couple hours. "So, does this mean you and I have...the same mother? I did read your birth certificate and mine, comparing them," Meg spoke, her voice calm and devoid of any other emotion.

Katherine absently stirred her lemonade, trying to think of how to get this out without offending her sister. "Well, as you already know yourself, Alan Halsey was already married to Marianne Halsey – and no, I won't call him Daddy like you do," she told her coolly. "He was never a father to me, unlike the one I've known only through my mother, visiting with her while he was committed into the mental asylum because of his condition that they called incurable. That man who spent fifteen years of his life in an institution and died there...he was my father because Mom was married to him, and she raised me by herself because the man who made me kept his distance all to 'protect my family'," she spat, feeling like she wanted to really spit in Halsey's face. Meg actually cracked a grin, knowing what she was thinking. Katherine shrugged and continued.

"Mom had an affair with Alan because her husband whom she loved to death was locked away without hopes of ever being released, which is also exactly why I do what I do. They said Dad couldn't be cured and released, tried everything from drugs, surgery, and the horrible shock therapy. But it all overwhelmed every system in his body and turned him into a stiff." She could feel the tears pricking the corners of her eyes and could see Meg's eyes glazing over, threatening to spill their own. "But besides that, back to her and Alan...your father, who also happens to be mine. She told me they were together for a few months after Dad was taken to the institution, before she went to him and told him she was pregnant. He finally confessed to his wife, who was unable to have children of her own, and it should be obvious how she took it. He broke off the affair then, leaving my mother to take care of the baby herself, until further testings of an ultrasound showed that she was having twins, and when she went back to him to tell him and Marianne, it was agreed that the twins would be split up. I suppose Mom felt it in her to at least show her sorries and regret, one act of kindness that she actually knew would never make up for taking Marianne Halsey's husband away from her. Mom knew offering a child in replacement of one Marianne couldn't have herself would never erase Alan's unfaithfulness."

Never in her life did Katherine ever tell anyone the truth about her parentage, until now. Her mother would have been called a whore if anyone knew what really happened, and the truth she'd long ago told anyone who asked her about her daughter was that her father died before Katherine was born. Mentioning Alan Halsey, the dean of the medical school, would have shamed them on the spot. It would have shamed the other sister, too, but looking at her now, she saw that Meg was crying now, the tears streaming down both cheeks like perfect straight rivers. "I'm...sorry," she choked out, looking down then and staring at her own lemonade, unsure if she should drink it now because of what she was feeling. "I don't know...what to say."

"You don't have to." Katherine didn't expect her to.

"It explains why I never...resembled that woman who I thought was my mother. I think now, maybe that's why she killed herself when I was fourteen." Meg's lips pursed into a tight line of rage and betrayal. "How could Daddy do this to me? To you?" she choked out. "And to...Mother." The way she spoke the title was alien to herself.

"I wish I had the better way of answering, but families never keep secrets from each other. He lied to you for your own sake, but mostly to protect himself and his own reputation," Katherine seethed. "He kept you and I from seeing each other, from you knowing your birth mother and me." She pointed to herself for emphasis. "Mom currently lives in the retirement home, if you're wondering." Meg nodded but said nothing.

"He said he loved me, but he prevented me from meeting my real mother and my sister," she spoke softly after a long pause. "I feel like I don't know him or myself anymore. I've said yes to him all these years, even after Mama died, said yes for the sake of it because I was afraid of losing his support." Her teeth tightened. "And I said yes to marrying my own professor whom I saw only as an uncle figure because I couldn't find another that my father didn't want me around."

Katherine hated seeing her like this, so she reached out and placed her hand on Meg's. To her surprise, the other sister didn't pull away. "I don't approve of any of that, but I want you to promise me something. You need to stand up and tell him no, someday eventually. You're a woman now, and you're in charge of making your own destiny. I've always been in charge of mine, never relying on anyone else, and look where I am now." She smiled at her, but Meg's barely reached her eyes.

"I'm at the top of my classes, but I'm still under my father's care; Carl is in charge of my grants and scholarship coming up. I'll lose it all if I say no, lose everything I have. Where will I go then, Katherine?" she asked fearfully. Katherine sighed and shook her head.

"Come home to me and Crawford then. We're the only family you have now, and he's more than ready to get to know you." She paused there, now thinking about Herbert still at the Halsey house. "And Herbert, how is he now?"

"He's the same as ever. I barely see him outside school; most of the time, he's always in his room with the door closed, and sometimes in our basement doing God knows what," Meg answered tightly. "I don't even know what he's up to, but he said his...'work' requires privacy."

Katherine ticked slightly. The last time she and Herbert spoke, he'd told her that the animal subjects he'd snuck away were violent as ever, nothing much changed, and he still had yet to convince Meg to get involved. Katherine knew risks had to be taken in these things, because all her experiments with her patients had required the same, though one she remembered all too well was Pretorius, who lived for his work and barbarous joys in the "red room". "He's...on the verge of a great breakthrough," she said carefully. "He's onto something that could revolutionize medicine. But that's really his decision to tell you."

Meg stared at her, baffled, even when the food finally arrived. "You know what he's up to?" she asked. "Does this have to do with his professor in Switzerland, Dr. Hans Gruber? I know about his work about breaking the barrier of brain death."

Katherine nodded as she unfolded her napkin and placed it on her lap like a proper lady. "Involves that, yes. But like I said, he won't let anyone else in because he's missing something that he needs access to, and he was considering you about it." She stopped there, mentally smacking herself for letting that slip. "I'm afraid I've said too much, but please trust me that he's gone beyond Dr. Gruber and that bastard Dr. Hill," she said, laughing with her sister. That stopped the conversation right there for now, the topics changing to other things like their careers, but Katherine knew that, deep down, Meg was planning on digging into Herbert's background. She wouldn't be surprised if Meg would find out the truth eventually if she hadn't...but it also made her fear losing their budding relationship once Meg uncovered what happened in Zurich.

~o~

Meg felt like her whole body had stopped working altogether when she read Herbert West's file in Daddy's office near the end of the day. She'd made the excuse that she'd left a book in her father's office before he left, but when the substitute was leaving for a quick run, she snuck her chance to the file labeled WEST, HERBERT...and all hell broke loose then when she found out what really happened in Switzerland.

"Oh, God," she moaned when she closed the file in her car, staring at her house for a long time, unable to move or breathe at the present.

He'd lied to her about "no more I could learn". She knew there was something off about him from the very beginning – correction, insane – and WHY did she find herself thinking he was so attractive? Dr. Hans Gruber died of a heart attack in his own classroom last spring, barely starting to summer, and his star student and assistant, Herbert West, was present. For hours after that, he...did things to the body, causing a life-like animated reaction that the dean called the police and had him taken to the local psychiatric hospital, where he remained for two months until Dr. Katherine McMichaels came to retrieve him, bringing him back to Arkham where he was now continuing his schooling.

And living in the same house as her and her father.

Her hands found themselves gripping the steering wheel once again, her knuckles turning white and sweat on the rise, Meg's breathing becoming hoarse and labored. God, Daddy...what the hell was he thinking, letting that man live here, if he knew what happened? And what was Katherine thinking, bringing him back here? But then Meg remembered her successful cures of schizophrenia, but West didn't have that – did he? A schizophrenic wouldn't have the delusion of breaking the brain death barrier, right? Meg wasn't a psychiatrist, but she knew full well that the answer to that was no. West just...he kept to himself and clashed with Hill in front of her and the other students so bravely, without a care in the world. He accused Carl of plagiarizing Gruber's theories and ideas, so...did this mean he was here because he was trying to show the world he knew better than Carl Hill did, because he himself had been taught so well, worked alongside a legendary scientist for so many years?

She'd just got back from another long day at the hospital, she wouldn't have to deal with Carl for awhile, and she'd also just learned about how Marianne Halsey, the woman with an unstable mental state and took it out on her own daughter, was never her real mother. Her own father lied to her all her life; he had an affair with another woman and produced twin daughters – and separated them so he could take one, but it worsened his wife's condition when she learned of his cheating of her. Perhaps it justified her unable to have children of her own that he had been with someone else and got one of the twins born – but it was still inexcusable to keep one twin girl oblivious about her true mother and her sister all her life until she found out for herself.

For years, Megan Halsey admired the works of Katherine McMichaels, felt like they were somehow related in actually caring about the patients enough to save them, if in different fields. She was her sister and therefore one half of her now that she knew it. Meg wanted her in her life now, wanted to see her more and make up for lost times, but what would her father say if he found out?

She finally found it in her to leave the Chevy and lock it safely before marching up to her house. West wasn't home, as usual. Now that she knew his background, what was he hiding that she didn't know about? What did he have in his room – and what did he do in the basement? She had to be careful when she tread the waters; West was clearly insane and intense, and he could very much do something to her in order to protect his secrets.

On the other hand, he was here for a reason, and therefore he might not harm her because he knew that since she was the dean's daughter and his most hated rival's betrothed, people would look for her and find out he was responsible. What did he want of her then?

She made way for the kitchen, dropping West's file on the counter and heading for the fridge for a glass of orange juice mostly because she needed it for the sake of it, and paused as soon as she opened the door.

"Rufus?" Meg frowned, closing the door. That was strange. Rufus normally greeted her when she arrived; he would also knock something over, something that would make her father angry if he ever found out. She tried telling herself he was around, just hiding somewhere as usual...but her other self persisted in searching the house. She called for him again. Still nothing. Assuming he was in her room, she went upstairs to check there. Once again, nothing. Scoffing, Meg turned to leave and check Daddy's room instead...and stopped when a sudden tightness wrapped around her heart with the knowing pressure of West's room behind her.

Maybe Rufus was there.

Slowly turning around, Meg stared at the closed door for a few moments, the same frown once more pulling at her face. No, Rufus couldn't be there; Herbert made it loud and clear that he wouldn't allow her pet anywhere near his private sanctuary, but she had to be sure. Perhaps if her cat was there, then maybe she could sneak around there for more proof of his mysterious life before he got back from pushing bodies around in the morgue. She remembered wondering why on earth he would be doing that, given his perfect background in Europe – before she decided maybe he was doing that to cover up his real motives for being here.

West's room was just as broad as hers, but didn't furnish much besides the bed, still having a few boxes lying around, shelves of books, and a couple posters detailing the anatomies of the human body and the brain. And there was also the refrigerator lying to the left side of the bed, which faced her...and was slightly cracked opened, letting loose a sinister, luminous green glow that wasn't anything she was familiar with. That terrible feeling in her heart, now spreading to her whole body, worsened as she knelt down and opened the door before letting it go and finish opening on its own...

"Oh, God, Rufus...!"

"What are you doing in my room?" She spun around and stood up fast, gasping and shrieking at the same time, getting away from Rufus' carcass in the fridge and landing on the bed, looking up in horror at the sight of Herbert West, the room's owner, seething down at the unwanted sight of her. "How DARE you come into my room? I thought I was renting this for privacy, Megan."

She found it in her to stand and stick her chin out at him. "It's not considered privacy when I happened to be searching for my cat only to find him in your fridge." She nodded to the still opened door. West, however, gave no emotion, his scowl remaining in place, then raising it to fix it on her again. Meg burned again under its pressure, his green eyes flaming with the savagery of a raging fire. She returned it dauntlessly. "Would you mind telling me why you killed my cat and put him in your refrigerator?" she demanded, knowing no other way. "He hated you, I know that for sure. He was terrified of you."

His body stiffened, face unchanged. "I did not kill your feline. He was dead when I found him."

She gritted her teeth. "You're such a liar. Daddy and I let you live with us, I spend the day with my newly found twin sister only to come home and find my cat dead and in here of all places," she spat, motioning behind her. "If you didn't kill him, then what happened?"

Herbert's face softened, slightly. "It knocked the garbage over and got its head stuck in a jar," he answered. His swing from stern and angry changed to soft and sympathetic in a matter of seconds, whipping her like a cat-o-nine tails and catching her off. "You weren't home, so I simply put it in there. I certainly didn't think you'd want to find it like that. I did not want to stink the place up. I swear to you, I was going to show you."

Alright, she could see that he would never lie to her about anything, but it still did not erase what happened or WHY he couldn't tell her at the hospital right away. "And you couldn't even call or at least leave me a note?" she accused, making him angry again.

"I was busy pushing bodies around, Meg, as you must have known before," he replied. "And what would I have said in a note? 'Cat dead, details later?' What good would that have done if you had more questions on your mind? I'm sorry you had to come to this. I know you were fond of it, but I wasn't. That doesn't mean I would ever kill it, as you accuse me of."

And they said words hurt like a rose with thorns. He was the thorn in her side at this very moment. "Whatever. I don't know if I believe you or not, but when Daddy comes home –"

He interrupted her with a sharp fit of laughter. "Oh, run to Daddy, eh? A grown woman running to her father when she can't deal with this herself? You think running off to him would make you any more of a woman than you seem to be?" he sneered.

Her temper snapped, but she forced it to hold. He knew how to get under her skin. He made her blood boil, no matter how soft-featured and how much intelligence he possessed...and that intelligence including knowing which buttons in a person to push. Forcing herself away so she could stare down at Rufus in the fridge, she could still feel his eyes on her, but he said no more.

He was right. She relied on her father too much. But it was all for a reason; if she said no or defied him, who knew what he would do to her future then. She blamed him now for how her life turned out; she'd lived lies all this time, and now it was even more since Rufus was dead. West said he didn't kill him, but she wasn't sure if she would believe it. She wasn't there so –

And then her eyes fell on the source of the dismal green glow: a vial of a brilliant green fluid. "I think you'd better leave now," Herbert ordered behind her defensively. Picking it up, Meg now saw this as something...unauthorized and illegal. Perhaps THIS was what she'd been looking for all along, something that would get him into trouble and out of here off campus so fast his head would spin. She stood and was about to demand what the hell this green shit was before he snatched it out of her hands. "THAT...is none of your business."

"Oh, I think it is my business," Meg started furiously.

"As it was your business to read my file that you stole from Daddy's office?"

Her whole body felt like it had been frozen in the cryogenics chamber. Damn her, had she known he was coming back so soon, she would have taken it upstairs with her and hid it. "What I do in my father's office..."

"...is known as trespassing," West answered, his lips curling into a demented smirk to one side, and now she was ready to lose control and smack his perfect face and leave a mark there. "I'd hate to bring this in and report that the dean's little princess – and the school's most promising – stole this when nobody was looking, have her suffer the consequences on moral grounds."

Meg seethed; how dare he blackmail her into protecting his secret, whatever this was?! "You really think Daddy would expel me for this? Unlike you when I get through to him as soon as he returns."

"Oh, will you?" He gave a short nod, though he didn't really believe her. "Well, you may well be right." He tilted his head forward, that smile back once more. "Are you sure you want to find out, Miss Halsey, that he would really see you as his little darling once he learns how bad you've been lately? Sneaking around and meeting a twin sister he tried so hard to keep you away from? That you read private student records without his permission?" He leaned in closer so she could smell his breath; it wasn't bad, but it was hot on her face that she shivered involuntarily.

"Or that you're about to take another step down forbidden roads you should have watched out for?"

Everybody, get your seatbelts in place; this is going to be an even bumpier ride. ;) The tension between these two was just too irresistible.