Disclaimer: Glee and all its affiliates are not mine.
Author's Note: As you can all tell, I'm getting kind of bored with this story, and thus this last chapter will be quite short. I had first intended for this to be some cracky one-shot type of thing for laughs because a charming friend of mine requested it. Then my brain won't shut up and I just ended up writing a series of unfiltered steam-of-consciousness's that never really connected or ended anywhere. Also, never written anything g!p or Glee before so I gave it my best shot (to be completely honest I've only watched Season 1 and had to Google/Tumblr the rest). Thank you for all the kind words, very encouraging since I really haven't written outside of academic nonfiction and biochem lab reports for about 6 years now. Been quite a ride ya'll, thanks for the responses!
How Brittany Pierce Might Have Saved the World
The Lopez and Pierce families were flying in to LA for Alejandro's second birthday in two weeks. Santana Lopez had been running around like a chicken with its head chopped off because Lila wanted to bring her bloodhounds and Grandma Lopez was apparently bringing enough food to feel a third-world nation. And her wooden spoon. Oh, also, Brittany was pregnant again.
It was right when Santana had finally closed the merger with Seattle's Best that Brittany began to feel extremely ill in the mornings. The smell of blueberry muffins, her favorite breakfast food, had Brittany lunging for the toilet. So Santana took a day off of work and accompanied her wife to the doctor, who called them back in about a week with the blood test results.
It wasn't that Santana didn't want more kids, but it was taking a toll on Brittany. This pregnancy was starting out a lot harsher than when her blonde wife had been pregnant with Alejandro. Morning sickness made her so tired and achy that Brittany had to stay in bed for an extra hour before she managed to get up. And the cravings made it worse. Her senior PA Mike Chang had to compile a map of restaurants in LA, color coded by Zagat ratings, ethnicity, and distance from the Lopez-Pierce home. He was mad at her for days.
Right now Brittany was in a Latin food kind of mood. Santana had cheekily remarked that if the blonde wanted some Latin in her, there was no need to order out; that earned her a scowl and the silent treatment. She still had to go get Brittany the Ultimate Burrito combo, which came up two hours later and had Brittany wretching so hard she was crying.
Oh yeah, this pregnancy kind of sucked for the both of them.
Not that Santana wasn't excited about this baby, but it was kind of the doctor's fault, really. He prescribed the contraceptive pill for Brittany after she stopped breastfeeding Alejandro, but that gave her lots of headaches. So they switched off to a different one, and apparently it was the period in between that Britt got knocked up again.
Alejandro was really excited about the new baby. Well, as excited as an almost-two-year old who kept chanting 'baby, baby, baby' while pointing at Brittany's stomach could. If Ale got the pitch right it almost sounded like that old Justin Bieber song (poor kid was washed up now, the papers said he checked into rehab last week). Her little dude, though, was awesome. His stubbornness aside, Alejandro Josef Pierce Lopez was turning out to be a lot like Brittany (which was a surprise, since physically the only thing that seemed to come from Brittany were his eyes and his cute little ears). Her boy was giggly and happy all the time, except for when he needed to have his diaper changed. He didn't like that. Ale also liked to toddle around the house in nothing but his diaper, but it was summer and Brittany let him. Santana got a kick out of catching her little man unexpectedly and blowing big raspberries on his bare stomach. Her kid was so fucking perfect. The only thing Santana had to worry about was watching her mouth around him, 'cause since he started talking he picked things up really quickly. Like when she complained about that sack of shit Karofsky when he yelled at the Becky Jackson, the sweet mail room girl with Down's Syndrome. Brittany got mad at her when Ale wouldn't stop repeating 'shit' with the biggest, goofiest smile on his face around the neighbors. That was a shit day.
10 years ago, when Santana Lopez was slogging through an entry level job, subsisted on coffee, and hated almost everyone, if some had told her that one day she would be a billionaire with a gorgeous dancer wife and a beautiful son, Santana Lopez would have taken her Logitech keyboard to their face.
Then she met Brittany Pierce. It was strange how the universe worked, to have such a ruthless and devious person fall in love with a woman who was her complete opposite in almost every way, bright and sunny and cheerful. It was as though Brittany had been made just for her.
Though if Brittany Pierce wasn't there to tone down her crazy, Santana Lopez, as capable as she was almost demonically ambitious, might have razed the world to the ground.
Huh, maybe the universe was just looking out for its own ass.