Chapter 10
I can't believe this story has gotten so far, I'm so happy! You all have been so awesome and supportive and your reviews give me so much joy. Please keep reviewing I love hearing your thoughts. My updates should begin to be more regular now that school is done…
Disclaimer- I own nothing
Still rated T- (language and discussion of abuse in this chapter amongst other stuff.)
This is a long one which is why it took forever, and I had to split the date into multiple chapters, which makes me sad, but I had to do it justice.
(Tris POV)
I cover my smile with my hand as I see Four drive away with a smirk.
I run up the stairs, two at a time and burst into the apartment to find Christina on the couch, snuggled in a grey blanket, nursing a huge mug of coffee. She must've slept in with Will this morning.
"What's wrong Tris? Did practice end early?" Christina sounds exhausted, she clearly just woke up. It's already 11:00, so she must have a long night shift ahead of her.
"It's a really long story… practice was cancelled this morning. I went for a run and ended up near the Dauntless Bar and the gym down the block. I freaked out. I thought for sure Eric was going to be there." Her eyes widen and she sets down the mug with a clang.
"OH MY GOD, TRIS, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HANDS? Did you run into Eric? Why didn't you call me? Are you ok oh my god Tris- "
"Christina, I'm fine! I didn't call you because it was like 7:00 in the morning and I didn't run into Eric, I ran into Four. He was in the gym, so I went in. And he taught me self-defense moves, apparently he used to train people there. That's why it looks like I just beat the crap out of somebody." I hold up my bruised knuckles.
"Why the hell was Four in Eric's gym?" She examines my hands curiously, still trying to process everything.
"He lives there, Christina. It's insane. He literally lives in our old building. Four offered to drive me home so we had to walk there to get his car and when we got there- I almost shit myself. His truck was parked right next to Eric's." I release a nervous sigh and Christina's jaw goes slack.
"I was so scared, but I just sort of got in the car and Four didn't pressure me into explaining myself. He was so sweet, all morning." It takes Christina a minute to respond. She's as confused as I was.
"Tris. It's so dangerous for you to be over there. Please tell me you won't go to that side of town again, I don't know what I would do if you got hurt. It doesn't matter how sweet Four is, it's not worth risking your life to see him. Who knows what would happen if Eric found you." She looks at me with fear in her eyes, which is a startling expression to see on Christina's face. "Tris, he could kill you."
I burst into tears at her brutal honesty. She immediately pulls me into her arms on the sofa and my tears wet her shoulder. I know she's right. I have nightmares about it all the time. Eric has a gun in the safe in his bedroom, but it's not like he needs it to kill me. If Eric had seen me this morning, I wouldn't be standing here right now. No matter how much self-defense Four taught me.
"I'm sorry Tris, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm just scared. I can't lose you." I feel more tears surface.
"It's ok Christina, I'm scared too. But I'm not going anywhere." I hug her back tightly, letting the reality of what could have happened today wash over me.
Slowly, we release each other and I begin to calm down. I can't go back there again. What if Four takes me near his apartment for our date?
"There's more Christina." She dabs her eyes with the corner of the blanket and sighs.
"This morning was so fun, despite where we were." She smiles and leans back, ready to listen.
I tell Christina everything, from the way he wrapped my hands, to the way his car was spotless and smelled like a Christmas tree. I describe his understanding nature and the way he held my hand. Christina listens wholeheartedly, and it's one of the things I like best about her. She makes you feel like all your problems matter, and your feelings are valid, and she's always ready to talk some sense into you. She resembles a dog with its head cocked sideways, listening with her whole body.
"So then, as he was about to leave he said, 'It's a date', and I felt my cheeks get hot, but I couldn't stop smiling. He's so amazing Christina. I don't know what to do with myself." I'm beaming again, like he just asked me out. Christina's eyes light up.
" My Trissy has a date with a hot football player!" She squeals. I roll my eyes, but my smile persists. She jumps up and races to her closet, on a mission. Her attitude can change on a dime.
"What are you doing?" She's ransacking her closet like she left a $100-dollar bill in her pocket. She throws a black bra over her shoulder and narrowly misses my face.
"I have to find something, go take a long shower and wash your hair. I'm gonna make you look so cute!" I groan, but it's clear I have already lost this argument.
Secretly, a small part of me is thrilled that Four will see me in something other than a ponytail and some kind of yoga outfit, but I'm still scared of what Christina will come up with. I would be lost without her though, considering my wardrobe consists of workout clothes and two pairs of jeans.
It's hard for me to be comfortable in most types of clothes. For a while after I escaped I only could wear the hospital scrubs and sweats because tight clothes hurt my broken and bruised skin. After a while, I was uncomfortable with anything that didn't fit me like a sack, and it took almost a year before Christina could convince me to wear leggings. I still get nervous about wearing anything too revealing, that kind of attention makes me so ashamed and nervous. I've never worn anything more racy than skinny jeans and a high-necked sweater. Eric still has a hold on how I feel about my body. I tell myself I'm just worried someone will see my scars, but I know it's more than that.
What if Four expects me to wear a dress? What if he sees me in regular clothes and is disappointed? It's not like I have anything to show off. He probably just takes pity on me. Who wouldn't?
I grip the ledge of the tub and sit under the spray of the showerhead. When I sit here I can pretend it's just the water, that I'm not actually crying over wearing normal clothes. I really shouldn't be going on this date. He's going to hate me when he realizes how pathetic I am. Why would he chose me?
It's been almost exactly eight years since I've gone on a first date with someone. And that someone was Eric. He is the only person I've ever dated. Six years. It took me six years to escape him. How pathetic. I have no idea what to do on a first date. Do people kiss? Do they wait for the third date? When are you supposed to say goodnight? I love you? Four has no idea what he's getting himself into. Maybe I should spare him the trouble and just cancel right now.
"Tris hurry up! I have something for you!" Christina. I can't let her down.
I stand up, still a bit shaky, and let the water run through my hair, rinsing out the conditioner. I feel the weight of my emotions as I attempt to breath, trying to explode out of my chest and crush in on my heart at the same time.
I step out and dry off, trying to ignore my body and my undoubtedly red, puffy eyes in the foggy mirror. I sigh and leave the room, walking to the kitchen in my towel. I take two spoons out of the drawer and put them in the freezer for later. I find Christina in her room, with a bright pink box in hand. Uh oh.
"So, this was gonna be for your birthday, but this is more important." Please don't be lingerie, please don't be lingerie, please, "So don't forget in a month when I don't have anything for you that I gave you this. Please try it on before you say no. For me." I suppress a sigh and take the box to my room. I sit on the edge of my bed and begin to inspect it, with my hopes low and nerves high.
The bright pink paper inside matches the box and I peel it back to reveal a tight, black, long-sleeved ribbed shirt that has a long torso with what appears to be a crotch attached to the bottom. I hesitantly pull out the next item, which appears to be some nude tights with the feet attached. What the hell is she trying to get me to wear? I hold my breath a bit and pull back the final piece of pink tissue paper, revealing a long piece of flowery, soft fabric. It's a full-length skirt. I hold it up and examine the design. The background is a light grey, covered in a variety of blue flowers of every shade and size.
It's beautiful. And it will hide my scars. My breath catches and I feel my eyes tearing up. She has no idea what this means to me. Maybe I can feel normal for once.
I quickly wrap my towel around my hair and throw on some black underwear and a matching bra, a huge change from my normal sports bra. I take a deep breath and begin to struggle into the tights. The material is sheer, but it covers my scars from a distance. It takes several minutes, but with some leg pinching and fancy maneuvers, I manage to get them on. I move onto the shirt, which looks ridiculous without pants to over the bottom. It's like I'm wearing a long-sleeved swimsuit, and it is tight. I avoid the mirror again, refusing to consider my reflection until everything is on. I must give all of this a real chance. I pull the long, flowy skirt out of the box and watch the fabric ripple in the air. It's a soft, relaxed material and I easily step into the skirt and fit it high on my small hips. Now, the moment of truth.
I look in the mirror and gasp. I look so different. The skirt gives me height, and emphasizes my hips. The material blooms with blue flowers, as if they were painted on to me with water colors. I spin and swish the skirt around my ankles and it's like I am looking at someone else. My tight-clad legs look foreign to me, slightly fake, but flawless. It's bizarre. My small breasts swell slightly against the high neckline of the shirt, giving me a softer appearance. It doesn't hurt that I'm wearing the push up bra Christina gave me last year. I still look petite, but more feminine than I thought possible. How the hell did Christina do this? I feel the ball of fear in my chest turn into excitement, and I race out of the room to Chris, feeling like a princess as my skirt swirls around me. For everyone else, this is just a cute outfit, but for me, this is everything.
Christina squeals as I race into her arms.
"Christina this is so amazing! Thank you!" She smiles widely and returns the embrace, picking me up and spinning around.
"You like it! Youlikeityoulikeityoulikeityou-" She squeals like a little girl, jumping around holding my hands.
"I love it! Now stop screaming and help me find shoes! We're doing this!" She is just as thrilled as I am.
As she runs off to get shoes, I go to the freezer and remove the spoons. It's an old trick I learned when I had to work in the bar after a beating. I close my eye and place the spoon over it to reduce the swelling, hissing from the cold. It may hurt for a minute, but it covers up the fact I've been crying for most of the last hour.
Christina works on me like an artist, racing around and creating a masterpiece with skill and inspiration. I no longer have any objections, and she slowly transforms me into a much softer, feminine version of myself. When she finishes, I stand in the mirror, determined not to cry over the fact that I look beautiful.
My hair cascades over my back in loose blonde curls, full of shine and softness. My makeup is light, making my eyes look bigger and my thin lips stand out. I'm feel like the best version of myself, one I don't recognize because it has been so long since I have looked this way. I'm by no means fancy, clad in my trusty combat boots under the skirt, but I still feel like a princess. I never realized how much I missed dressing up.
I finally peel myself from the mirror at 4:55 when there is a firm knock on our door. On the way there, Christina stops me to spray some perfume on my wrists while brushing her teeth, getting ready for the night shift. I take a deep breath and open the door, full of excitement.
Four stands tall in the doorway, nervous, with his hands behind his back. His eyes light up when he sees me and I slowly take in the sight of him, all cleaned up.
He is wearing a black t-shirt with dark jeans and a leather jacket and dear god he looks like a super model. Holy shit. How is he always so hot?
"You look so… amazing, Tris. Just…wow." I can feel my heart swell in my chest. Words. How do I use those again?
He looks down, a bit timidly, and removes his hands from behind his back, revealing a beautiful bunch of light blue daisies that resemble the ones blooming across my skirt. How did he do that?
The flowers remind me briefly of a stunt Eric would pull. He would always bring me a big bouquet of red roses when it got bad, like somehow, I would be able to forgive him. And at the very beginning, I'm ashamed to admit that it worked once or twice. I must've stared at them too long, because Four starts to stammer.
"I'm sorry. I know, they are not- um- much, but- uh I just kinda hate roses, ya know?" I grin.
"Me too! No Four, they are just, perfect. Thank you." I gesture to the flowers on my skirt and he laughs, gently handing them to me.
Christina strides in, hairbrush in hand, with her tense eyes focused on Four.
"Tris, go put those in a vase, sweetie. Four and I are gonna have a little talk." Four gives me a panicked look and I put my hands up helplessly, it's not like I have the power to stop her. She grabs him by the arm and closes the door sharply.
The door muffles their conversation, but I wouldn't be surprised if Four walked back in here with tears in his eyes. Chris doesn't play around when it comes to defending me. And the fact that she doesn't know Four makes her worse than most overprotective dads with a daughter going on a first date.
It takes me a minute to find a vase, I've never really needed one before. I find a simple crystal one in the far back under the sink and fill it with water. I set the vase in the middle of the kitchen counter, so you can see the flowers from almost anywhere in the apartment. There's still no sign of Chris and Four, and I begin to wonder if he's still alive. I go to the peephole in the door to investigate, standing on my tiptoes.
Christina's back is facing me and Four has backed up to the wall. His expression resembles that of a toddler being chastised for accidentally repeating a curse word. I really feel for him; Christina's fury is not easy to endure. His eyebrows furrow together in concern and a frown tugs at his lips. I'm a little worried she's going to scare him away. I swallow a surge of guilt and walk over to the couch, crossing my legs and pulling on my knuckles in anxiety. Four doesn't deserve this. I'm not worth this.
My thoughts are interrupted by the door as it swings open, Christina gliding in as Four follows sheepishly. Four gives me a small smile, but I'm too nervous to return it. Chris grabs my arm and drags me into her bedroom, leaving poor Four in the front room, awkwardly playing with the rug with the toe of his boot.
"Christina, please tell me you didn't say anything about Eric. I'm worried he's gonna get scared off." Chris just shakes her head.
"You have to promise me you aren't going to do anything you don't want to tonight. Promise me."
"Christina, he's not like that, he would never make me do something like that."
"Tris, I'm not talking about sex. I mean anything. If you don't want to kiss him, or hold his hand, or go somewhere, or if you feel scared or uncomfortable, you tell him so and you call me. Will is gonna be here, and he can come pick you up, no matter where you are. You must promise me you will trust your gut and call for help. No exceptions. I don't care how hot he is, you are more important than what he wants. Think about this Tris, really think before you promise me." Her eyes are scared, and her words are urgent. I let them sink in and respond slowly, but honestly.
"I'm ready Christina. I promise." She searches my eyes for evidence of a lie, before deeming my response satisfactory.
"I love you Tris. Have fun tonight." She pulls me into a bone crushing hug.
"I love you too. Thank you for everything, Christina." We hold each other for a minute, before Christina jumps away and goes through the door to the room Four is waiting in. He looks at me with a big smile, his eyes full of kindness.
"Have fun kids. If she's not home by 11:30, I'm tracking you down and killing you. Do not test me. Nice meeting you, Four." His face is noticeably pale when we exchange a worried look. He holds the door for me and waves to Christina as he closes it behind him.
"I'm so sorry she gave you such a hard time. She's really protective of me." He brushes my apology off.
"Tris, you're worth the lecture. You look so amazing, by the way. I still kinda can't believe you wanted to go out with me tonight. I'm so excited." I almost laugh at the idea that Chris put blush on me earlier, when I'm going to be permanently red in the cheeks from just being around Four. As we walk down the stairs, I notice he is careful to let me walk first.
"That's really sweet Four. You clean up pretty well yourself. So… where exactly are we going tonight?" Please don't say near your apartment, pleasepleaseplea-
"We can totally do something else if you want, but I was thinking we get dinner at this really good burger place called The Pit. It's like 10 minutes from here, but there's a decent chance we will see Zeke or Uri there because their mom owns the place. The burgers are so good though, it almost makes it worth it." I chuckle, imagining how irritating they could potentially be if they found us on a date. Four gets the door for me as we reach his truck, before walking over to his side and sliding in.
"That sounds great Four, I don't think I've been there before. Why do they call it The Pit?" He shifts smoothly into drive and backs out with precision. There is something undeniably sexy about a good driver. I fiddle with the straps on my purse, determined not to be caught staring.
"You'll see soon enough. I think you will like it. And then I thought we could go to the Ferris wheel, because I've never been before. After that, we can go on a little adventure in this park I discovered just North of there. I mean, if you want. Otherwise we can do anything you would rather do, I have no idea when you want to go home or anything. It's really up to you." I sigh in relief and grin, his nerves about tonight are rather endearing. None of these things are near Eric's apartment.
"That sounds perfect Four. How have you never been on the Ferris wheel before? It's one of my favorite things to do in this city!" He bites his lip and glances at me.
"I don't know, I guess I just never got around to it." He glances at me again.
"This is going to be so fun. Thanks for this morning too, it was nice to learn self-defense from you. You are seriously a good teacher." He smiles and looks away shyly.
"Well, you were really fun to teach. Not bad for a stiff." He smirks, knowing how annoyed I was at Peter for calling me that.
"At least I'm not a pansycake." He gasps with mock hurt and his hand brushes mine.
We both feel the energy of the touch, and I suppress a gasp. He stops at a red light and we lock eyes, confirming the connection. I decide to make the first move, slipping my small, perpetually cold hand into his large, warm one. I give it a gentle squeeze and I hear him sigh, sending butterflies to my stomach.
My intense anxiety and doubts about tonight lift away, floating like the fog whipping around the truck as we drive downtown. I let out a soft sigh as he lifts my hand and places a kiss on my knuckles, still bruised from this morning's training. The atmosphere in the car is comfortable and warm, and I am so thankful I decided to go out with him tonight. Being with Four feels foreign, yet strangely familiar. Something about us just clicks, and I think he can feel it to.
Four pulls up to The Pit, and I'm a bit taken back by the exterior. The building is rather circular, and painted completely black, resembling a giant hockey puck. Four waits for me to get out of the car before offering his hand to me, which I take without hesitation. We walk in to the restaurant, greeted by the host, a woman covered in tattoos with long, thick, dreads. I give Four a skeptical look.
"Trust me. You are going to love the food." I chuckle and look away, only to catch him staring at me as we are walking to our booth, a blush creeping up his neck. I double check my teeth for lipstick.
The tables are black and red and the whole place looks like a big, circular bar for biker gangs. Towards the center of the restaurant there appears to be some sort of band on a lower level in the floor. I can see now why they call it The Pit.
We are seated on the far side of the circle, close to the wall. Various bike parts, patches, and leather jackets are displayed across the walls. I turn to see Four's reaction to the room, to find him staring at me again. Not in a gross way, like Al, but in a sweet, innocent curiosity. I decide to tease him a bit.
"What the heck are you looking at?" He blinks hard before shying away in embarrassment. He takes a minute before responding.
"Your hair is so beautiful. I never noticed how long it was before. And your eyes are so- you- just damn. Damn girl." I burst out laughing at this, the words he used are so out of character, yet so genuine. I can't stop smiling.
His comment leads us into a world of light hearted fun. We take turns creating detailed tragic backstories for all the crazy looking people that work here and we guess what's in a burger by it's weird made up name. We both laugh until our stomachs are sore and I notice that he drinks coke instead of beer. Is he not drinking for my sake? Did Christina say something? Either way, it makes me feel relieved.
It's amazing how little I have to worry about with him, a stark contrast to any "date" Eric would take me on. This is so fun.
With Eric, I would have to watch everything I did. How much my food cost, what I wore, what I talked about, how many times I kissed him. I wasn't in control of anything, and no matter what I did, how well I performed, he would find a reason to beat the shit out of me later. That reality was almost the worst part.
When our food arrives, the waitress brings two huge hamburgers, mine covered in mac and cheese and Fours under a pile of bacon. Four laughs at my bewildered expression at the mountain of food in front of me.
"You've got this Tris! We're in this together now." I burst into giggles at his serious expression and he watches as I struggle to take a bite of the tall burger. The cheesy mess practically melts in my mouth and I sigh in satisfaction.
"This is the best burger I've ever had! How the heck do they make it taste like this?" Four smiles widely and pumps his fist in the air.
"Yes! I knew you'd like it! Hanna owns the restaurant and she's basically a gourmet chef. She's Zeke and Uri's mom and like a mother to me. Before we leave we will have to go say hi to her." I nod and continue downing the giant meal in front of me.
We fall into a comfortable silence as we eat and the band begins to play. The music is a bit different than I expected, instead of heavy metal The Pit is filled with older rock songs, some I even recognize from high school. Not that I listened to music a lot. We miraculously finish our huge meals and Four high fives me as I take the last bite. He couldn't be more different than Eric.
Four spots something over my shoulder, behind the booth and his mouth drops open. I'm about to turn around to see what it is when he ducks down a bit and hides his face behind the menu. I almost panic, but I notice his shoulders shaking in laughter. I slump in my seat and try not to laugh.
"Shhhh. Trust me, you don't want him to see us."
Large footsteps come to a stop as they reach our booth, and I burst out laughing at the sight of Zeke standing there with a piece of chocolate cake in his hands with a massive smirk on his face. Four is still "hiding" under the menu, and Zeke plucks it from his hands, setting the cake on the table. I'm still giggling at Four's expression, but I lose my shit as Zeke sits right in Four's lap.
"Fancy seeing you here this evening, Tris. What is a lovely lady like yourself doing all alone on a Friday night?" Four dramatically gasps under Zeke, but Zeke has an iron grip on the table, so Four can't pry him off. He slumps back in defeat.
"You see, I was just waiting all by myself here for someone to bring me cake. It seems my prayers have been answered." Zeke winks at me and reaches for my hand as he continues.
"It's what I do, giiiiiirl. Now what do you say you and I get out of he- OOF!" Four has managed to shove Zeke out of the booth, and he narrowly avoids falling flat on his face to the floor. My body ripples with laughter and Four just shakes his head at Zeke. Zeke brushes himself off and dramatically addresses Four.
"So, dude, were you gonna tell me you were dating Tris, or just wait until you guys got married?" Four looks embarrassed, yet I don't think he is embarrassed of me.
"I was going to tell you tomorrow, after our date, to avoid your harassment, but it seems my plans were foiled. Who turned me in?" Zeke rolls his eyes.
"The hostess told Hanna the second you got here! I've just been spying on you so I could bring you cake. No harassment intended. Bye the way Tris, the only thing hotter than you is the speed at which you eat a burger. I'm impressed." I blush, despite the insane nature of his compliment, and Four nods in approval of Zeke's words. He grabs my hand across the table, squeezing gently.
"Yeah, she's pretty great. Now Zeke, if you don't mind, Tris and I would like to eat this cake in peace, as we try to forget the fact that you are spying on us, so please, for the love of god, go away. I promise I'll call you and tell you everything tomorrow." Zeke seems satisfied with this agreement.
"Fine, I'll leave you alone. Treat her right Four. Remember, I'm always watching." Zeke backs away, tripping over a chair leg immediately. He turns around and runs back to the kitchen, sending a wink my way. Four facepalms and I erupt into another fit of giggles.
"I'm soooo sorry about him. He is such a dumbass sometimes. But, he's basically family, so I can't kill him." He pauses, taking a more serious tone. "Just for the record, I wasn't embarrassed he would know I was dating you. I just was trying to keep him from doing something stupid, so naturally he did it anyway." He hands me one of the forks Zeke brought with the cake, and we dig in. It reminds me of the cake from the cafeteria at the training center. Yum.
"I get it Four. If I had a friend like him I wouldn't have said a word about dating someone. I'm surprised you had the guts to take me here, knowing he could be lurking in the corner." Four laughs and shakes his head, still in disbelief of the stupidity of his friend. He pulls his buzzing phone out of his pocket and bursts out laughing.
"Zeke has apparently been texting me this entire time. Oh my god this is so funny." He hands me his phone and I see a long stream of texts, starting from half an hour ago.
Tell her she looks pretty
Tell her about what Uri did, it will make her laugh
Kiss her
Do it now
I'll give you five bucks if you kiss her right now
I'm bringing you cake loser
If I was an assassin, you would be dead 20 min ago
Compliment her shoes, chicks dig that stuff
10 bucks says you won't kiss her
There are so many more texts, but I hand the phone back because I'm almost crying with laughter. Four is shaking his head and points to the bar. I see Zeke sitting on a barstool, staring directly at us. Four flips him off across the restaurant, and Zeke blows him a kiss. I can barely breathe, I'm laughing so hard. Four rolls his eyes and turns back to me, taking another forkful of cake. He studies my face and his mouth stretches into a small smirk.
"You've got some frosting right there." I blush with embarrassment and grab my napkin, wiping my right cheek. He shakes his head and smiles.
He reaches out carefully with his thumb, and wipes gently just to the right of my lips. The air around us crackles with electricity.
"You have such cute dimples. I don't know how I never noticed them before." It's just a whisper.
His hand lingers and I sigh, closing my eyes in response to his tender touch. His fingers graze my jaw and he gently tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear. Is he about to kiss me? I'm not ready. I feel my heart rate pick up and I take a deep breath. I open my eyes shyly and cover his hand with mine, bringing it down to the table. I look him in the eyes and he nods in understanding. I carefully explain myself.
"I think… if I was a normal person, I would've kissed you right then." He gives me a tiny grin.
"Normal is overrated."
Sorry, I really wanted to do the whole date in one chapter, but it would just be way too long. This is already my longest chapter so far. (5,634 words!) Hope you enjoyed, more Fourtris to come soon. Yes, eventually they will kiss. Be patient.
-Laurel