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Chapter 9.

"The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again."

-Charles Dickens

POV: Rose

Date: November 23, 2013

"The Doctor does love company when he's traveling," I said as I stepped up next to Clara. She was staring at a large board filled with pictures of the Doctor's many companions.

"Well who wouldn't?" she asked. "Traveling alone is no fun."

I smiled slightly, and turned to see the younger Doctor sitting in a chair off to the side of the negotiation scene. I hesitantly walked over to him, and sat down.

He glanced up, and I could see that thoughtful look in his eyes again. "Yes?"

"You looked lonely," I said, and glanced over at where my Doctor was running around the table chattering. "Besides, they don't need me."

He looked up at his older selves, and let out a short laugh. "They do seem to have more than enough energy between them to keep a handle on things."

I chuckled. "You have no idea."

He stared at me then, and the look he gave me sent a shiver up my spine. "What was your name?"

"Rose Tyler," I said, and held out my hand.

He shook it. "And you're from my future?"

My lips twitched up into a slight smile. "Only by a little bit."

He returned my smile. "Then I look forward to meeting you properly."

I laughed, and glanced up, only to freeze when my eyes found her staring at me from across the room. She looked so sad for only the briefest of moments before she jerked her head to the side.

"Excuse me," I said, and stood to follow her.

I was stopped by a hand on my arm. "Where are you going?" Clara asked.

I felt a familiar warmth tickle my heart as I stared down at her. She was still so young, and so fresh to this life. But despite her youth, I could still see it—that love for the Doctor that was so clearly in her eyes. She had the look of someone who would die to protect him, and I wondered if she knew that she had already. I wondered if she knew how grateful I was for that.

I granted her one of my tongue-in-teeth smiles. "I think our boys can handle this; there's something that I need to do."

She reached out to squeeze my hand, and then I could see it—she knew. She knew what was about to happen. And the fact that she knew, while I didn't, was more than a little unsettling. What was even more unsettling, however, was the fact that I could see she wasn't going to try to stop me from leaving.

"Be careful," she said, and I could feel the weight of her words as they settled themselves on my shoulders. "He needs you."

I glanced over at the negotiation table. The younger Doctor was still hanging back, but I could see a slight smile on his face as he observed his older selves. As I watched, the older Doctor glanced up and locked eyes with me. I saw him swallow hard, and I longed to ask him where I was in his time. I could still see the wedding band on his finger, but with the Doctor that could imply a whole host of possibilities—not all of which were good for me.

His eyes asked the question, and I gave him a slight nod before I finally allowed myself to look at my family one last time. I could feel how excited they all were to be together again, and I had to smile. It had been far too long since the last time we were all in one place.

Finally, I turned to leave.

I had nearly made it to the door when I felt another hand on my arm. I glanced over my shoulder, and my eyes met with Mara's. She looked concerned. "Where are you going?"

I sighed, and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. I wasn't sure I was strong enough to leave her again. "Don't be afraid; I'm coming back. I promise, okay? I'll be back." I wasn't really sure which one of us I was trying to convince at this point.

She smiled slightly. "I love you, Mum."

I kissed her cheek. "Be brave, Sweetheart," I murmured, and forced myself out through the door. I pushed myself to walk away, and I didn't stop until I was far away from the archive. I took in a deep breath, and closed my eyes. "I'm here."

I felt it when she appeared before me, and opened my eyes. "So you are," she said simply.

I glanced down one side of the alley we were in. "We can't stay like this for long. The paradox would be…" I shuddered at the thought.

She laughed, but the sound was bitter. "I know, I know. Are you ready?"

I bit my lip—was I? Could I really do this? Could I really leave them behind again?

I thought back to the face of the younger Doctor. He looked so weary—as though the choice set before him was physically aging him by the moment. And I thought back to the first Doctor I had met—my Doctor. He had been fresh off of the Time War. He'd already made the choice, and it had nearly destroyed him. Even now I knew that the decision he had made, or at least believed he'd made, ate away at him every day. Could I do this if that meant I could spare him that pain?

I nodded. "I am."

POV: Mara

Date: November 23, 2013

I watched Mum go with worry crinkled across my forehead. I had felt her deep sadness when she'd kissed my cheek. She was up to something—something big, but I knew in my hearts that I didn't have the power to stop her. I could only count on her promise to come back.

The negotiations between the Humans and the Zygons finished smoothly, and it wasn't until the final treaty was signed that I started to get anxious. Mum wasn't back yet—where could she have gone?

I felt it then, and both my sister and my dad's eyes shot up when it registered with them too. It was like a spark across our telepathic network, and after it had passed there was a hole where my mum's soft light should be.

"No!" Dad shouted, and everyone in the room jumped when he violently pushed away from the table and started to run for the exit. Everyone except for his older self, that is. "Rose!"

"She's already gone," the older Doctor called out calmly. "And there's nothing you can do."

Dad froze, and slowly turned around to face his older self. I could see the storm in his eyes, and I didn't need an empathic connection to feel the anger that rolled off of him. "You knew this was going to happen." His voice was deadly calm.

The older Doctor glanced down. "I may have remembered. That doesn't change the fact that it has to happen—you have to let her go."

"Doctor, he's right," Clara said, and bravely stepped closer to my father. "Even if you try you won't be able to find her. Not for a while, at least." She glanced back at her Doctor, and he cast his eyes down.

A charged silence settled over the room as my dad glared daggers at the older Doctor. Just as the tension was reaching its peak—one of the lab techs cleared her throat.

"Um, excuse me?" she asked, "but weren't there three of you?"

All of our heads swiveled over to where the younger Doctor had been sitting, and Dad cursed when we found the chair empty. "He must've already left for…" he trailed off, and looked over at the older Doctor with wide eyes. "You don't think he's already?"

The older Doctor leapt into action. "Get back to your TARDIS, we'll meet you there!"

Jenny and I ran after Dad as he sprinted for the ship, and all three of us shoved through the doors to get to the controls.

"But what about Mum?" Jenny demanded. "Aren't we going to save her?"

Dad kept his eyes on the console as the TARDIS shook. "Your mum knows how to take care of herself."

"But Dad—" I protested.

"Girls, it's your mum or Gallifrey." He shot his eyes up to give us both a hard stare. "Which would you choose?"

Jenny and I glanced at each other, and I swallowed. "Gallifrey."

"Right then." He inputted the landing sequence, and waved a hand for the doors. "Let's go."

We followed him out into a barn. It was a wide space with bright beams of sunlight peeking through the cracks between the slabs of wood and dust floating in the air. I glanced over at Clara and the older Doctor as they came out of their TARDIS. Their eyes were locked on where the younger Doctor was standing in the middle of the room. In front of him was a large box covered in Gallifreyan markings. On top of the box there was a ruby attached to an elegant golden stem.

"I told you," Clara said. "He hasn't done it yet."

"Go away now, all of you. This is for me," the younger Doctor rasped, and turned away from us.

"These events should be time-locked." I picked up on the tension in my dad's voice. "We shouldn't even be here."

"So something let us through," the older Doctor said.

"Go back," the younger Doctor ordered. "Go back to your lives. Go and be the Doctor that I could never be. Make it worthwhile." His hand shook as he turned away from us and placed it on the red button.

"All those years, burying you in my memory," Dad muttered as he stared at his younger self.

The older Doctor glanced at Dad. "Pretending you didn't exist. Keeping you a secret even from myself."

Dad took a step forward. "Pretending you weren't the Doctor, when you were the Doctor more than anybody else."

Mara stepped closer so she could take my hand, and I gave her a weak smile.

The older Doctor walked over so he could face his younger self. "You were the Doctor on the day that it wasn't possible to get it right."

Dad stepped up to his other side. "But this time," he said, and placed his hand overtop the younger Doctor's on the red button.

The older Doctor placed his hand over both of theirs. "You don't have to be alone."

I swallowed, and pulled Mara closer.

"Thank you," the younger Doctor whispered so softly that my Time Lord ears were almost unable to hear him.

There was a moment of complete silence.

Dad pulled in a deep breath. "What we do today is not out of fear or hatred." He looked over at us. "It is done because there is no other way."

I saw a tear streak down Clara's cheek, and reached out for her hand. She bit her lip and wouldn't look at me. I squeezed her hand anyway.

"And it is done in the name of the many lives we are failing to save," the older Doctor said, and glanced at Clara. She shook her head at him. "What?" he demanded. "What is it? What?"

"Nothing," she said.

"No, it's something." He looked away from her, and I could feel my dad's shame when he saw her tears. "Tell me."

"You told me you wiped out your own people," she said, and her voice was small. "I just. I never pictured you doing it, that's all."

I closed my eyes. I knew the feeling. I had never imagined Dad standing there either.

I felt something shift, and opened my eyes as the room went dark. "What's happening?" Clara demanded.

"Nothing," the younger Doctor said. "It's a projection."

"But how is it projecting?" Mara asked.

She received no answer as we watched the images play out around us. It was a dark street with debris from what I could only assume was a firefight scattered everywhere. Fires were burning all around, and I was suddenly hit with the flash of a memory from a timeline that didn't exist anymore. Another dark city on fire, and then white walls.

"These are the people you're going to burn?" Clara demanded.

I opened my eyes again, and watched them running past us. There was terror on their faces as they scrambled to get away from their attackers. I heard a child scream, and glanced over to see her trapped in a pile of rubble as a Dalek approached her.

"Dad," I whispered, "you can't."

He stared right through me with hard eyes. "There isn't anything we can do."

"He's right," the older Doctor said. "There isn't another way. There never was. Either I destroy my own people or let the universe burn."

I remembered then why Mara and I had left, and looked away from him. There was no one, singular being in this universe or any other that should be allowed to make that kind of choice for billions. Not even him.