"Marlene McKinnon?" A skeptical voice asked. Marlene McKinnon turned around, looking behind the cold concrete bench she was sitting on, to see James Potter slowly approaching her, a sly grin across his face. "I didn't know you smoked?" He said looking down at the cigarette hanging freely between her index and middle finger.

"Only when I'm feeling like shit," she replied honestly taking a long drag and blowing it out into the cool January wind. It was freezing outside, the grounds buried in snow, but Marlene was enjoying the cold much better than the feelings waiting for her inside.

"You had quite a night didn't you?" James asked running a hand through his messy black hair.

"That's sugar coating it."

"I figured you might need a friend."

"It's nice to know I've still got one." Marlene replied bitterly. There was a large gush of cold wind that blew over the two of them, whipping Marlene's blonde locks behind her back. It was obvious to Marlene that James was anxious to get back inside but he stayed seated beside her not moving on inch.

"You know you have friends." James said reassuringly. "It's just...sometimes people on the outside struggle to understand our situations." Marlene looked up into James's large brown eyes, the two of them sharing a long hard stare.

"I just felt like I progressively fucked up more and more as the night went on until everyone I knew was furious with me. I didn't mean to..." she said, her voice faltering near the end. "I sort of just lost control."

"I know." James replied honestly. "And despite her current state of frustration Evans gets it too. It's only that it's hard, especially when you're friends with both people. I think she's just a little taken a back you know."

The two Gryffindors sat there in silence for a few more minutes just the sound of cold winds and Marlene's frequent exhales of smoke until finally she tossed the burnt out cigarette butt to the floor, turning to face James again.

"I can't go back in there."

"Yes you can."

"I'm humiliated...they all hate me..."

"Rubbish" James replied with a shake of his head. "Nobody hates you Marlene and it doesn't sound very Gryffindor of you to take the cowards path. Walk back into that room and explain yourself. If they're your friends they'll understand." Marlene took a deep breath bracing herself for what lay ahead.

"Thanks Potter" she said with weak smile. "It means a lot."

(That Morning)

"First day back!" Lily exclaimed throwing the curtains around Marlene's bed open. "You have Potions with me and there is absolutely no way you're going late to the first class after Christmas break." Marlene groaned loudly burying her face into the large fluffy pillow she'd been sleeping on since September.

"Kill me," she mumbled only to receive a pillow thrown directly at the back of her head. .

"Get up!" Lily called as she headed into the washroom. It took five minutes before Marlene was finally out of the bed and an extra thirty for her to choose a suitable outfit and get some makeup on. She braided her hair back, too lazy to be bothered with brushing the curls out. By the time she was finished and grabbing a hold of her book bag she had fifteen minutes to spare for breakfast before class.

When Marlene entered the Great Hall she saw that Lily already had herself a seat near the center of the table and was almost finished her bowl of Cheeri Owls.

"You're late" she mumbled, her mouth full of cereal, as she flipped through the newest edition of the Daily Prophet.

Marlene grabbed herself a slice of toast, hurriedly smearing butter and jam all over it before stuffing it into her mouth and eating it in large bites. As she ate her eyes scanned down along the table only to catch on a certain tall and dreamy looking Marauder. Sirius was laughing at something James had just said, throwing his head back a little like he always did.

Marlene quickly darted her eyes away in the opposite direction, cursing herself for even thinking about him. Ever since she'd gotten off the train last night she had decided that the new year entitled reviving an old rule, no boys.

The rule had already been broken once though seeing as when her carriage pulled up to the school Damien had been standing there waiting for her, a large grin across his face. The two of them hadn't spoken much more than a few greetings but they shared a quick kiss and parted to their respective tables.

"Guess who" a familiar voice whispered, covering Marlene's eyes from behind.

"No idea" she lied, a few crumbs flying from her mouth. Damien leaned forward and gave her a kiss on the cheek before squeezing in beside Marlene and Lily.

"How are you doing this morning?" He asked sweetly placing his hand on top of Marlene's knee underneath the table.

"Fine" she replied blandly. Marlene could hardly look Damien in the eye seeing as all she felt was guilt every time she did. She felt guilty for wanting to end whatever they had going on and she felt guilty for sleeping with Sirius behind his back.

"I was thinking, how about after class today you and me meet up and head down to the lake?" Marlene prayed that the expression on her face didn't convey how she was feeling inside. She wanted anything but alone time with Damien. What Marlene really wanted was to walk away from the situation right now and forget all about it, but that was never going to happen.

"Okay" she agreed, half heartedly smiling at him. Damien leaned in to kiss her but at the last second Marlene turned her head giving him the cheek. She didn't look at him as he got up to leave the table, she couldn't look into those eyes one more time.

"Jezz Mar don't break the guys heart or anything" Lily quipped, looking from Damien to Marlene.

"I don't know what to do," Marlene groaned dropping her head down on top of the long wood table.

"Well you'll have lots of time to think about it during our walk to potions" Lily grinned, tossing her paper down and grabbing her bag from under the bench.

Marlene spent her entire day avoiding both Sirius and Damien, which was challenging since Sirius just so happened to be in every one of her morning classes. In Defense Against the Dark Arts Marlene fought a Ravenclaw for a seat in the front just so she wouldn't be tempted to sneak glances from behind him.

By the time her last class had finished Marlene was less excited about her upcoming date with Damien than she had been when he first asked.

"Do you think I could fake sick?" Marlene asked her dorm mates, the five of them all lounging around their dorm.

"So is it officially over?" Mary asked curiously, as she lay across her bed, feet in the air, completing Trig homework.

"I'm just not interested anymore...is that selfish?"

"Not at all" Brooke spoke up, she was sitting on the floor against her bed brushing through her silky brown hair while reading the latest edition of Witches Weekly, which had arrived that morning in the post. "Relationships are doomed to end, humans aren't meant to be monogamous."

"Ever the romantic Brooke" Lily said, stepping out of the washroom. She came over and sat on the edge of Marlene's bed, the mattress sinking slightly under her weight, and looked directly into Marlene's nervous blue eyes. "As long as you're respectful and honest nothing can go wrong."

"Right" Marlene replied gulping nervously. "Honest..." Lily gave her a questionable look before asking the big question.

"You aren't going to lie about Christmas break are you?"

"What happened over Christmas break?" Panda asked suddenly. It was nearly the first word she'd spoken to anyone since they'd come back last night. She'd been acting incredibly strange since the girls had arrived.

"Marlene shagged Black" Brooke answered lightly, as if the sentence held no weight.

"Brooke!"

"What?" Marlene just rolled her eyes. She looked over at Panda again whom was biting the end of her quill she was supposed to be completing Trasnfiguration homework with.

"Anyway I think it's fine if Marlene wants to keep the holiday break a secret," Brooke said flipping a magazine page loudly.

"Really?" Marlene was relived to have someone agreeing with her.

"On what planet is it all right for Marlene to be, dis-honest for personal benefit? I think it's only fair for Damien to know why he's getting dumped."

"You can't get dumped if you were never a couple" Marlene spoke up, earning her a cold stare from Lily.

"I'm serious Marly if you hide this from Damien the only one you'll be hurting is yourself."

"That's not fair-"

"Neither is lying!" Lily added with a look that read 'conversation over.'

"How long do you think it'll take to break up with Damien?" Brooke asked carelessly. "Because there's a party in the common room after dinner."

"What party?" Mary asked, looking up from her homework.

"The Talon brothers party!" Brooke answered sounding shocked that Mary even had to ask.

"I can't believe I forgot about that!"

"They throw one every year" Lily sighed tossing a strand of red hair from her face.

"I got drunk for the first time at one of those parties" Brooke said smiling proudly as she seemed to relive the memory.

"Remember that time Alice got so drunk we had to spend the entire night with her in the washroom?" Marlene asked, giggling to herself a little.

"It's was before her and Frank started dating!" Lily exclaimed. "I can't believe I forgot about that...she was trying so hard to impress him."

The four girls laughed and everyone seemed to enjoy reliving their memories of the famous Talon brother parties except for Panda who remained suspiciously quiet. Marlene was glad to know that after her highly anticipated conversation with Damien she'd have the comfort of knowing there was a bottle of Firewhiskey waiting for her.

Marlene had come down to the Great Hall with the rest of her friends to eat dinner and once she was done her large bowl of chicken soup she felt a light tap on the back of her shoulder.

"Ready?" Damien asked, a large grin across his face. Marlene nodded her head receiving a mouthed "good luck" from Mary. She headed out into the cold January night with Damien throwing on the coat and scarf she'd brought down with her.

"It's freezing out here" Marlene said, holding her arms tight around her torso as the two teenagers headed down towards the lake they'd first met at.

"S-sorry" Damien stuttered his teeth clattering. "I just needed a quiet place we could talk, somewhere no one would be."

"Well you're in luck, no one in their right mind is coming out in this cold" Marlene said, sitting down against the tree and huddling up. There was a long silence in which Marlene began to brace herself for the much-needed conversation to be had between Damien and her but before she could open her mouth to speak he'd already started.

"I've been feeling guilty since last night" Damien began earnestly. "I just really want to be honest with you Marlene" Marlene raised her eyebrow skeptically.

"Guilty about what?"

"I know we aren't dating but we are...we're doing something here..." Damien held the bridge of his nose between his fingers for a moment. "I...I slept with Pandora over Christmas break." Marlene sat still her mouth slightly ajar as she digested what Damien had just said. He couldn't mean Pandora? Not her Pandora? Not her friend.

"You shagged Panda?" she asked struggling to get the words out. Damien nodded his head looking ashamed. "My Panda? My friend Panda?"

"It was an accident Marly I swear!" Damien said reaching out to touch Marlene's arm. She pulled away coolly.

"Don't call me that," she said to him, shaking her head with disgust. Marlene stood for a few moments holding her head in her hands in complete disbelief. If it had been any other girl she wouldn't have minded. What did it mean to her if Damien had slipped up during the holidays as well but the fact that someone who was supposed to be one of her closest friends had done something so awful, Marlene couldn't wrap her head around that.

"Whatever we had here...it's over," Marlene said looking back at Damien again.

"Marlene-"

"Don't bother," she snapped turning around and heading back towards the castle. Marlene rushed up towards Gryffindor tower fighting back salty tears as the reminder of what Panda had done tousled around inside her head.

Marlene snapped the password at the fat lady and rushed into the common room only to be greeted by the party she'd completely forgotten about.

"Marly!" Brooke called out, already sounding drunk. "Marly you're back!" Brooke rushed over to Marlene, passing her a large cup of Firewhiskey. "How did it go?" she asked, wrapping her arm around Marlene's still cold shoulder.

"Fine" Marlene said bitterly, gulping down the Firewhiskey in her cup. Brooke didn't seem to notice her friends lacking mood and headed off to speak to another girl whom Marlene didn't recognize.

"Evening McKinnon" James said to Marlene, both of them fetching drinks. James grabbed two butterbeers while Marlene poured herself a generous cup of Firewhiskey. "I'm wondering if I should be worried..." James began looking down at the alcoholic beverage practically leaking from Marlene's cup.

"Don't be" she replied taking a large gulp. "I'm definitely not."

(Sirius)

Sirius had spent the entire day attempting to stay as far away from Marlene has he possibly could and from the looks of it she'd been doing the exact same thing. Through the duration of the Talon bother's party Sirius had caught Marlene getting increasingly drunker as the night went on, none of her friends seeming to notice.

Sirius fought the urge to walk over and encourage her to go up to the girls dormitory to sleep it off but seeing as she'd basically written him off he refrained and continued to joke around with various friends.

"Did you see Clementine Blooming in Potions today?" Carlton Axesworth asked Sirius. "Jesus that's one girl I'd like to date." Sirius chuckled giving his fellow housemate a pat on the back.

"Good luck on that one mate that's one girl who is off limits." Carlton chuckled to himself his eyes scanning the room a little before appearing to land on someone standing behind Sirius.

"What about her?" He asked, Sirius turned around to see that Carlton had turned his sights on to Marlene who was giggling exceptionally loud with Mary.

"Marlene McKinnon?" Sirius asked, as if it were the most absurd notion. "You think she's more reachable than Clementine Blooming?"

"Hey she went out with Damien didn't she?"

"They aren't dating" Sirius corrected instinctively "and anyway I'm almost certain that's still a thing." He struggled not to sound bitter about the last part.

"Don't look now but I think she's coming over here" Carlton whispered all of a sudden.

"What?" Sirius turned around, despite his friends advice, to see no other than Marlene standing right behind him.

"Sirius!" she exclaimed loudly wrapping her arms around his neck. Sirius could smell a mixture of Firewhiskey and Butterbeer on her breath and knew immediately that it was no longer Marlene talking.

"Do you think you could give us a minute?" he asked Carlton, whom shrugged his shoulders and headed off in the direction of a lonely blonde fifth year.

"You seem a little drunk Marly" Sirius said, looking the blonde right in the eyes.

"Mm I'd say very drunk! Unless the room is usually spinning..." Marlene said, toppling to the side a little bit. Sirius grabbed her by the waist holding her up straight.

"What's going on with you McKinnon?" He asked curiously, tucking a strand of curls behind her ear. Marlene looked up at Sirius her usually bright blue eyes now droopy and sad.

"Can I tell you a secret?" she asked, attempting a whisper. Sirius nodded his head, still holding Marlene steady. "Panda slept with my boyfriend while I was away." Sirius felt his stomach twisting into knots.

"Boyfriend?" he asked knit picking at the one word that really bothered him.

"Well I'd go more for ex-boyfriend now" Marlene said, giggling a little. "Now that he slept with my best friend...I thought friends didn't shag other friends boyfriends?" Marlene asked Sirius falling into him a little.

"Is that why you got drunk?" Sirius asked her. Marlene nodded her head and Sirius watched as her large blue eyes began to well up with tears.

"I'm a terrible person" she mused, her head falling into her hands, a long trail of blonde hair behind it.

"You're anything but a bad person Marlene" Sirius promised. "You're possibly the best person I know." Marlene looked up into his eyes causing him to get that feeling inside of him he didn't know existed until she was around. That feeling he got that made him feel like he was worth something, that made him feel alive.

"If I say something do you promise not to hold it against me?" Marlene asked innocently. Sirius nodded his head not breaking their stare once. Marlene lifted her soft palm against Sirius' warm cheek before leaning in and whispering into his ear, "I'm glad you're the one I feel in love with."

Sirius felt his stomach drop as he watched her slowly pull away a slight smile across her rosy cheeks.

"Me too" Sirius whispered to himself as he watched Marlene walking off towards another Gryffindor.

(Marlene)

Marlene had sobered up only enough to get herself up the stairs to the girl's dormitories and into the washroom to brush her teeth. She was leaving the washroom when she noticed Panda sitting on her bed playing with her thumbs nervously.

"Hey" she muttered to Marlene not even bothering to look up. If Marlene had been in her right mind she would have just forgotten about it gone to sleep and given herself more time to decide on the best way to approach Panda but the three rather large cups of Firewhiskey she'd had to drink prevented her from doing anything of the sort.

"Bitch" Marlene mumbled under her breath.

"What's that?" Panda asked incredulously, finally looking up. Marlene gave her a cold stare.

"I think you know what I said Panda and I think you know why I said it." Marlene watched as Panda's expression dropped quickly.

"Marlene I-"

"How could you!" Marlene snapped. "How could you do that to me?"

"It was an accident! We were practically the only seventh years left and he had this bottle of Firewhiskey hidden in his dorm...it was just supposed to be a little fun but then we got drunk and I made a mistake, I'm not proud of it Marly." Panda's eyes were filed with tears but Marlene couldn't seem to find any sympathy for her friend in her current stare of intoxication.

"I trusted you" Marlene said in disbelief. Panda jumped off her bed, and came towards Marlene as if to hug her but Marlene backed away.

"I'm so sorry Marly."

"You're sorry? Are you sorry you slept with my boyfriend while I was on holiday? Or are you sorry you lost my trust? Or maybe you're just sorry you got caught." Marlene said bitterly.

"Do be like that Marly!"

"Like what?"

"Like you actually care!" Shouted Panda. Marlene stood there in shock, her hands trembling with anger.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Come on you were about to end things with him anyway!"

"You don't even get it!" Marlene screamed angrily. "I could care less about whom it is Damien sleeps with what bothers me is that fact that you, as my friend, could do something like that to me! I would never sleep with Kyle no matter how drunk I was." Panda had begun to cry quietly as Marlene spoke. "Does Kyle know?" Marlene asked cruelly. "Because I'm sure he'd be interested in his girlfriend's holiday adventures!"

"Stop" Panda begged. "Please. You've made your point."

"No I don't think I have-" Marlene was about to continue when the dorm room door flung open and Lily entered alongside Brooke the two of them giggling profoundly.

"Hey guys-" Brooke began before stopping as she took in Panda's appearance.

"What's going on here?" Lily asked, slipping back into mother hen mode.

"Why don't you tell them Panda?" Marlene asked coldly. "Go ahead lets tell Brooke and Lily about how you fucked my boyfriend!" The room fell silent no one making a sound expect for the quiet snuffles from Panda as she cried.

"He's not even your boyfriend," she said quietly.

"Fuck you Panda!" Marlene began to shout. "Stop trying to make yourself feel better about this because you can't! You fucked up you fucked me over and you fucked Kyle over as well you're not the victim in this situation!"

"How about we all just calm down," Lily said stepping in between Marlene and Pandora. "Look Marly you've had a few too many tonight how about you just sleep on it okay? It's not going to end well for anyone if we continue this conversation." Despite Lily's advice Marlene stood still staring at Panda with fury.

"What? So Panda just gets the slip?" Marlene asked not willing to let the subject go.

"I'm not saying that I'm just suggesting-"

"Come on Marly how long are you going to be angry with me for? You say I can't play the victim? Fine but how about you stop playing it as well."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Please, you were sleeping with Sirius long before I even looked at your boyfriend." Marlene felt something in her snap and she side stepped Lily swinging her fist right into Panda's face.

"Marlene!" Brooke screamed in horror as Panda collapsed to the floor her nose bleeding heavily.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Lily snapped rushing over to help Panda up.

"I-"

"Just get out of here Marlene." Brooke snapped at her, helping carry a crying Panda towards the washroom.

Marlene rushed from the dormitory, running downstairs to the common room where only a few people remained, a couple near the fire making out and two third year girls giggling to themselves as they finished off the remainder of a bottle of Firewhiskey. Marlene headed towards the vacant couch lying out across it and closing her eyes to prevent tears from leaking out of them. She didn't know if she'd ever be able to face her dorm mates again.

Marlene woke up the next morning with a pounding headache and growling stomach. Too afraid to face her friends she left the common room still wearing the clothes she'd had on the day before, her hair a tangled mess. She ate breakfast alone and when Lily came down first she looked in Marlene's direction and made a point to sit as far away from her as possible.

Marlene barely managed to get through her classes due to her awful hangover and large pile of guilt. By the time she finished her final class she was rushing to get out of the castle as quickly as she could, finding a pack of cigarettes tucked away into her back pocket.

"Good luck" James whispered into Marlene's ear as she began her descent towards the Girl Dormitories. Her hands were trembling as she turned the knob to the dorm and all eyes were on her. Panda was sitting on the edge of her bed reading a book when Marlene entered. She looked up at the curly haired blonde and with an angry glance turned away quickly.

Marlene took a deep breath staring around at the girls in front of her whom usually brought her terrible amounts of comfort.

"I..." Marlene began to speak struggling to find the right words to say in her current situation. "I'm not proud of myself," Marlene finally said, everyone staring at her now, including Panda. "Last night I was drunk and incredibly out of line not to mention cruel. I do owe you an apology Panda and I'm sorry but I am angry with you. I shouldn't have started that conversation last night in my state but I can't change the past I can only apologize for my mistakes and move forward."

"I know you're all angry with me for how I reacted last night because it was selfish, seeing as I did the exact same thing to Damien as he did to me. I suppose the only thing in can say in defense of my earlier actions is that it really hurts when you think you know someone and you're wrong. Because when I left for the Holidays Panda, I was crazy about Damien and you knew that and even while you were drunk you should have realized you were hurting me because I would have cared enough to do that for you." Panda's eyes were watery once again.

"I know," she said weakly. "I'm sorry." Marlene fought back tears as she felt a lump begin to form in her throat. She turned to find Lily smiling at her proudly.

"You were a real brat last night Mar."

"I know" Marlene said guiltily.

"I wasn't mad at you Marly I was only disappointed. You didn't have to sleep elsewhere last night really. You know we love you." Lily said opening her arms for Marlene to fall into.

"Yeah I mean you really could have used a change of clothes you stink." Brooke piped up making Marlene laugh. Peace being restored to the Seventh Year Girls Dormitory.

Hope you enjoyed that! Reviews are appreciated as usual. xx