So, I'm bummed all around. My trip ended with me in the hospital Saturday night. Turns outs, I have what's called Intestinal Malrotation, which means my intestines are on two separate sides instead of the big one wrapping the little one. My appendix is in the left upper quadrant of my stomach. It's all very strange. Apparently, it's generally fixed before an infant turns 1, and only about 25% of people make it to adulthood if the condition goes unchecked. So, I officially feel like a badass. Anyway, so I'm here in the hospital with an infection of the small intestine. So whoo for my bleeding camping trip. *bitters*
However, in my drug-induced state of artificial bliss, my overwhelmed introverted brain ran away and hid in my headphones from the stimulation of the hospital, and I have concocted this for you out of my wonderful feels coming from my doting and flustered partner fussing at the nurses and doctors and constantly fluffing my pillow and trying to feed me ice chips and tucking my blanket tighter when I shiver in fever. It's all very adorable despite the situation. My Mama even went home without a fight, which is a big deal because we have a huge country family who camps out on the floor when one of us is in the hospital. Guess she approves of the partner 100%. She's the first significant other of either me or my brother whose been left completely alone when either of us were injured or sick. So, I guess I should marry the girl so she'll stop begging me to. Apparently, my tortured, broody, romantic cowboy heart is something she still wants to spend the rest of her life chasing. And she just officially got Mama's stamp of approval, something my brother's wife and mother of his child still hasn't received.
Anyway, I seem to be babbly today. Enjoy Lovelies!
Songs: Wagon Wheel by Darius Rucker, The One by Terri Clark, Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
12:01. Regina sighed and leaned back in her plushy office chair. The black leather puff offered the perfect amount of lower lumbar support, becoming the only place she sat comfortably anymore and completely pain free as long as she leaned back. Annabel shifted, and she smiled in spite of the anxiety and anticipation in her chest of Emma's pending arrival. She was late.
"Typical, Miss Swan," she muttered with a smile.
Love swelled where irritation once resided at Emma's flakiness. Never again. Though she had begun to fully appreciate her lover's free spirit before their latest trial, she felt the twinge of guilt at the slightest hint of aggravation at the beautiful blonde who danced to the beat of her own drum. She had no place for such useless emotions, not when Emma may be ripped away from her at any moment. They'd found each other again. The prophesy reset, which meant their time together already had an hour glass tipped against them. Drop by drop, the gentle rain of fate extinguished each moment of their burning love. Her last stronghold of hope flew towards Emma's memories. Just one day, she pleaded silently and soothed her rowdy daughter in her belly. Give her one day to remember her daughter, their love, everything they endured in order to reach this place.
Annabel twitched again, and Regina grinned down at the hand or foot moving the loose shirt against her belly. How had she ever been irritated at Emma? She'd given her not only a child but the beautiful blessing of carrying her. Her womb designed itself as a hostile environment, destroying the possibility of ever feeling life move within her. It was impossible, but Emma wished it into reality as though she merely conjured a fireball. If she ever figured out how to harness her power upon command, the force at her fingertips would go uncontested. No one was that stupid, suicidal perhaps.
"Is she moving around?" Stacy asked, breaking loose her circular thoughts. The woman hid halfway out the door, ready to bolt at the first sign of hostility. Poor Stacy. Regina had apologized a millions times in the past two months since deciding to co-mayor with her former servant.
"She's been quite lively as of late," Regina said in a girlish voice. Stacy puffed a sigh and crossed to the big desk. They'd shared the giant office for all of a week before Stacy retreated from Regina's pregnancy hormones and grief. Now that Emma had returned, the fussy mayor behaved much more like the quiet woman she respected and adored.
"Because of Emma?" Stacy continued, carefully maintaining a calm tone. Her tongue was easily excitable, and it drove the former queen up the wall with anger.
"I think perhaps she senses Emma's magic," Regina confided and rubbed her belly. Stacy smile shyly.
"Archie has been talking about children a lot since Belle and Ruby adopted Alex. Wasn't that just the sweetest thing?" Stacy babbled and then bit her tongue when her usual excitement bubbled in her chest.
"Yes, it was, and Ruby was correct. There's never a right time. Life is always complicated, and you will never feel ready." She passed her knowledge on to the woman who had been faithfully at her side for over half of her life.
"Any word on when they will marry?" Stacy fell into the safe vein of conversation. She may have been loyal to Regina longer, but the depth of Belle and Ruby's fealty and sacrifice far surpassed hers. Regina loved talking about her friends.
"Not as yet, Miss Cochran. Belle refuses to set a date until Emma recovers her memories. Before that, I assume they postponed in The Enchanted Forest, though no one knows absolutely until this curse is broken." Regina explained with a small grin at the couple's devotion to her and Emma as much as each other.
The conversation stilled with fumbling feet and a clattering entrance of a mildly tardy and flustered Emma Swan. Regina's smile grew at the hushed curse outside her office door and stood when Emma's voice proceeded her.
"I'm late! I'm sorry. There was an accident of the interstate. Oh crap, did I just barge into a meeting?" Emma asked with comically wide eyes.
"No Darling," Regina soothed her before she hyperventilated. "This is Stacy Cochran, co-mayor of Storybrooke and my successor," she introduced proudly.
Stacy's face brightened at her words and tone as she extended her hand as though they'd never met before that moment. "Hello, Emma. It nice to finally meet the woman who made Regina's lovely smile return."
The introduction may have been faked, but the words were sincere. Her own life had become exponentially easier without Regina terrorized Town Hall at every teeny tiny stressor. Emma grasped the proffered hand, not quite sure how to respond to the sentiment. She ran from it.
"It's nice to meet you, Stacy. Emma Swan," she greet cordially and then slipped her thumbs into the back pockets of her jeans nervously. Regina intervened, sensing her lover's unease at Stacy's gushing.
"I was just briefing Miss Cochran on our scheduled meetings this afternoon as I will be absent," Regina explained matter-of-factly. Stacy already knew of her intentions to spend every possible second with Emma, and she'd schedule half of the meetings anyway.
"I'll see you Monday, Madame Mayor." Stacy dismissed herself with a smile and nod.
The other two women watched her departure, anticipation building in their fingertips. Their eyes met for a long moment when the door clicked shut, and then two bodies rushed forward. Regina grabbed both sides of Emma's unzipped coat in clawed fingers and pulled her forward. Emma barely controlled her momentum enough to turn sideways rather than smack bodily into the baby bump between them. Teeth clanked painfully when lips met in frantic motion. Throaty sighs harmonized as the kiss soothed the dull ache in their bodies since they'd parted nearly two weeks ago.
"Emma," Regina breathed but lost her words when wet, demanding lips pressed against her throat. A sharp gasp replaced her thoughts, and fingers buried in yellow hair. She tugged against the strands roughly when Emma's hands slipped up the front and back of the thigh within her reach, lifting the grey fabric of her skirt easily.
"Emma," she chided the impassioned woman with her tone and tugged again when the first attempt yielded no result.
"Yeah?" Came the pre-coital gruff of Emma Swan's deep voice of arousal. The gentle nips and licks returned to her neck, and she gave in to her own passion. The second trimester without Emma had been excruciating. Apparently, it made you want to do nothing but have sex constantly. It essentially made every woman into Belle and Ruby.
"Take me home," Regina demanded. Her tone told Emma that her body surged with the same desire that had built during the five and a half hour drive that lasted at least an hour longer than it should have.
"Yeah," Emma agreed, and her hands and lips disappeared.
Regina reeled from the abrupt departure and found her bearings in time to accept the coat Emma slid up her arms. She held her scarf and hat and allowed Emma to pull her to the exit. They'd reached the car before she realized Emma carried her purse. Emma held the door open for her and guided her into the passenger seat before rounding her Camry. Regina took her hand the minute the shifter found drive. Words were unnecessary.
Emma offered her lover an arm and escorted her up the long walk to the mansion. Two smiles proceeded them into the foyer as they walked into a surreal scene. Ruby sat on the grand staircase in loose-fitting bluish-black jeans, boots, and a dark blue-green tank top. A guitar strap held the instrument in place as she strummed it with quick and graceful fingers in a Ruby Lucas acoustic rendition of "Wagon Wheel." Belle sat cross-legged on the floor in front of her. Alex snuggled into Belle's lap and watched her Wolf intently.
Regina studied her best friend. She'd changed so much, grown up in such a short amount of time. From that immature waitress in outfits more suited to porn costumes than diner work emerged this strong, proud, focused, grounded woman. She'd played a part in that when Ruby became her pillar of strength and support when Emma had been shot, but Belle influenced it more deeply, anchored it in their relationship. Between their awkward sexualities and clumsy, fumbling acts of love and chivalry, they finally found themselves as much as they found each other. Belle was good for Ruby, gave her a clear goal in life, and Alex only added to that. It was beautiful, and Regina loved the librarian all the more for it.
She'd continued seeing Archie when they returned from The Enchanted Forest, and he had encouraged her to explore her artistic side, and the young wolf immediately took to it with fervor. It encompassed everything from painting to singing and learning to play the guitar to creating new menu items at the diner. It fit her as perfectly as her red cape and came as naturally as her wolf's heightened senses. Regina suspected her wolf played a part in the natural ability to learn new songs perfectly within a few hours of attempting them and creating dishes that at first glance seemed hopeless but left her moaning for more.
Regina paused in the foyer and listened to the young woman serenade her family. The sight of Ruby singing to Belle and Alex with her guitar occurred at least once a week, so the event itself wasn't particularly significant or surprising. Something in Ruby's soulful expressions and body language, however, made both her and Emma watch in curious appreciation.
Her eyes were closed and her face scrunched or relaxed with each line as if she felt them in her soul, not just sang them. Her boot tapped on the step, adding a small bit of percussion. Her shoulders moved and dipped in that delicious way guitarist's often did when they felt the song in their heart and expressed it with their body. It was an addicting sight. Belle and Alex apparently agreed because both sets of blue eyes were reverently glued to their whole world
Emma wrapped her arms around Regina and held either side of her belly. She leaned into her and was pleasantly surprised when Emma hooked her chin over her shoulder. A finger on either side of her stomach tapped gently in time with Ruby's foot. Regina covered her hands, fingers sliding easily between Emma's longer ones. If Ruby felt a snippet for Belle of what she felt for Emma, she wasn't surprised that their relationship focused her energy into something positive instead of the destructive chaos her wolf used to leave in her wake. The song ended, and Ruby opened her eyes, seeing only Belle and Alex.
"Do you have time for one more or do you need to get back to the library?" She asked, her desire to continue obvious. Belle glanced at her watch. She was due to return at 12:30, which was five minutes ago. Ruby worked the later shifts on Friday and Saturday in order to do inventory, next's weeks food order and the financial books, which meant she'd not be home until 10 or 11 tonight.
"I have time," she answered and squeezed Alex tightly. Regina smiled. Emma may not have known the significance of her statement, but she had.
"Emma," she whispered when another moderately paced song came from Ruby's fingertips. Emma hummed in her ear as a response.
"Rock me," Regina commanded quietly and squeezed her hands tighter. Wordlessly, they moved towards the stairs to the left side of the foyer and left the family alone at the grand staircase.
The explosion of desire that controlled them at Town Hall smoldered into something slow-burning, a desire for intimacy but not necessarily sex. Once the door closed behind them, Regina pressed her forehead to Emma's and touched her mouth with three trembling fingertips. This form of intimacy had always terrified her the most. In the throes of passion or extreme grief, reactions and emotions always came with a safety net. Things may be blamed on the heightened emotions, but these moments only presented raw vulnerability that left her open to judgment and rejection.
Emma sensed the change and cupped her face in both hands. Thumbs brushed along wet cheekbones as Emma leaned back enough to meet her gaze. Regina offered a coy smile and dropped her gaze. A wide smile of her own pulled at Emma's lips. Regina was so sensitive. It was adorable and terrifying.
"Hey," Emma caught her attention and wiped her tears again. "What do you want?" Her pounded furiously at the simple question. Emma Swan worried very little about what her lovers actually wanted. They came together for one purpose. Not Regina. She wasn't that person with Regina.
"I want to be close to you," Regina breathed around her tears. Emma floundered. What exactly had that meant? Regina caught her.
"Will you read to me, Emma?" She asked insecurely, and Emma knew they danced on a precipice. Any perceived rejection would have destroyed the moment and sent Regina running for her ivory tower.
"Sure," Emma said and pulled her towards the bed. Regina resisted.
"Not there." Emma nodded, grabbed the book off the nightstand, studied her in confusion. Regina wordlessly tugged her hand and led them into the bathroom.
Emma's huge heart pounded harder when she realized what Regina wanted. It was incredibly familiar and reminded her of the many haunting whispers she'd experienced in her own bathroom in a house Regina had never even seen. Wide eyes watched the water adjusted and then met Regina's insecure gaze. She knew what she asked of her lover, and Emma realized it in that moment. The mayor waited for her decision patiently rather than assuming she'd already agreed. How the hell had Regina gotten into her head so quickly?
"I'm sorry, Regina. I suck at intimacy," Emma blurted. Regina's face fell, followed by her eyes. Emma moved forward and brought them both back to hers with a hand under her chin.
"Hey, I said I suck at it. I never said I didn't want to try," Emma assured her and was rewarded with the glorious lights of heaven when Regina's face split into a smile that would have made Helen of Troy jealous.
"Then allow me to apologize that I haven't been able to reach my legs to shave them in a week," Regina said in such a serious tone that it could have been nothing but a joke. Emma responded to levity in these situations. It soothed her, broke the tension, at least it always had before. Regina nearly cried again in relief when Emma snorted and nodded her head as she dropped her gaze to the aforementioned body part.
"If you ask me nicely, maybe I'll help you out with that," Emma said lightheartedly, but they both knew the offer was genuine. Regina had grown quite a bit since she'd last seen her. She appeared to be on the cusp between the second and third trimester by now.
"Will you be my White Knight, Emma Swan, and remove the prickly growth from my lower limbs?" Regina asked in a swooning, damsel in distress tone. She even offered a small swoon with the back of her hand on her forehead. Emma laughed outright and pressed a kiss to the newly exposed throat.
"Here," Emma said, snapped the toilet lid down, and ran water into the sink while the tub filled.
The warm water in the huge luxuriously bathtub was for soaking, not soiling, and Regina's exhausted body probably yearned for a good, muscle-relaxing soak. If she feared falling on dry sidewalks, the paranoid woman probably hadn't taken a bath in a very long time and simply used the smaller walk-in shower with two slip resistant mats in front of it. The protective overkill made Emma smile.
She turned from the sink and found Regina struggling with her black tights. Ruby or Belle must have helped her get them on this morning because there was no way in hell she managed that by herself. Had Regina dressed up for her arrival? Her cheeks burned with the thought. It wasn't necessary because Regina was beautiful all on her own. The lines on her face gave her sophistication and grace. Her body had obviously been cared for impeccably because it hadn't gained a lot of excess fat during the pregnancy, which meant she ate and exercised properly.
The baby bump, though cumbersome during sex, added to the unexplainable attraction of one Regina Mills. Though she'd never really been sexually attracted to a female before, Emma's body definitely tingled in all of the right places for this particular woman. It meant something. She simply hadn't found the right questions to asked in order to determine the answers that Regina appeared to have already found.
"Emma, I may need help," Regina huffed in frustration and dropped her hands to her sides.
Emma chuckled and dropped to her knees. Regina gasped lightly when cool hands slid up her thighs. Emma grinned wickedly at her around Annabel's watery home, and Regina clicked her tongue in mock frustration. Emma refocused on her task with a grin, finding what made the task impossible for the woman wearing them was the fact that panty hose were in fact two individual pieces. Emma rolled one and then used her palms to slowly reveal the skin she couldn't yet see.
Regina shivered beneath the fingertips slowly trailing down the sensitive flesh on the inside of her thigh. Emma had managed to make something as pitiful as her inability to unclothe herself sexy. It made her feel beautiful and attractive, even as bloated and helpless as she was. Emma always inspired that feeling with her thoughtfulness and playful approach to simple tasks, such as removing tights that had been cutting into her legs all day. She was still Emma.
"You dressed up for me today, didn't you?" Emma asked with a smirk when Regina took her shoulders in a death grip and lifted her foot. Regina cleared her throat and dropped her gaze to the green eyes twinkling up at her.
"Perhaps," Regina answered with a sniff.
Emma only grinned. She raised to her full height on her knees and pressed her lips to the swollen belly in front of her. Soulful green eyes held her gaze as she repeated the sensual process with the second leg. Regina blinked rapidly, chest heaving at the thick and heady tension of the moment. Emma's fear had dissipated, leaving behind an intense desire to make her feel as wonderful as possible for as long as possible. Tears blurred her vision and dripped onto her cheeks when she realized Emma's intentions.
"Regina?" Emma asked softly, concerned that she'd crossed a line, made the sensitive mayor uncomfortable in some way. Regina waved a hand at her wet face and then returned it to her strong shoulder.
"You make me feel beautiful, Emma," she explained a moment before more tears spilled out. Emma pressed her lips into Annabel a few more times as she studied Regina's happily crying eyes.
"You are beautiful, Regina," she confirmed and kissed her belly. Annabel squirmed towards her mother's touch, and they both smiled, having felt the motion inside and out.
"She likes you," Regina said and wiped her tears.
"And what about her mommy? Does Mommy like me, Annabel?" Emma teased, trying to pull the levity back into their emotional detour. Regina ran her fingers into yellow hair.
"Emma Swan, if you make her jump upon my bladder again, I will make you sleep on the floor." Emma pulled back from the belly and smiled prettily up at Regina. Regina's lips tugged upward, destroying her stern expression, when Emma batted her eyes, accentuating the innocent smile.
Regina swatted her shoulder and lowered herself onto the toilet. Emma shut off the tub water and quickly set to work before it cooled. Her arms just reached the sink from her position on the floor. Regina squirmed under the attention. Not that she'd never been bathed and plucked and pampered by others when she'd been queen, but this was different. This was Emma. This was the woman she'd given her heart and soul and who currently remembered none of that, none of them.
"So, how many weeks are you now? About 27 or 28 right?" Emma asked when she sensed Regina's anxiety, thought she assumed it to be for all the wrong reasons.
"Monday starts 28," Regina answered in a rasping voice and cleared her throat.
"Yeah, I remember this part well," She said with a laugh. "Try finding a comfortable spot on a prison cot. I made friends real fast with the nurse in the infirmary. The guards took pity and let me sleep down there sometimes. It was a total breech in protocol because I was unattended with just the night nurse, but I guess they figured since I was in for a non-violent crime and as big as a barrel of beer that I was safe enough to leave there."
"You gave birth in prison?" Regina asked, hoping her tone sounded surprised. She knew this already, but Emma just confided something personal and painful.
"That's right, Madame Mayor, you're cavorting with a criminal," Emma jabbed playfully, covering her own anxiety at sharing the information.
"What did you do?" Regina asked curiously. Emma hadn't actually ever told her this story, so in a way, it was a new experience. She discovered Emma's grey past through a background check when she'd first come to Storybrooke.
"Got caught helping my boyfriend fence some stolen watches. I didn't steal them. All I did was get them out of a storage locker. Got 11 months. I almost gave Henry up for adoption. I was 18, broke, in prison. No job. I grew up in the foster system, so I had no family. The nurse was already out the door, and I heard him cry. I'd never screamed for someone to stop so loud in my life. I couldn't risk him having the childhood that I did, and I'm thankful everyday that I made that decision. He's my whole world," Emma said with a content smile and eyes hazy with memories.
"That's an incredibly story, Emma. He became your beacon of hope in a dark time," Regina summarized the entire situation in one sentence. Emma nodded and wiped down her cleanly shaven and sticky leg.
"I can't wait to meet him," Regina nudged her again subtly. She desperately wanted to see her son again, even if he wasn't able to remember her.
"Soon, if things keep going as well as they have been. I was sort of dating someone unofficially for a few months before I met you. I made the mistake of allowing Henry to get attached to him. I can't do that to him again if this doesn't work out. I'm sorry, and I hope you understand." Emma paused and studied Regina's face.
The poor woman looked like she'd been kicked in the chest. Regina covered her chest with a shaking hand, reminding it to breath again, and bit down on the tears threatening to spill onto her cheeks. Her reaction was insane from Emma's perspective. Of course someone as attractive as Emma beat people away with sticks. Her memories had been stolen by the previous curse, and she had physical and emotional needs. She was still Emma, though. Her previous lover had not been allowed to spend the night if Emma's panicked reaction to the suggestion during her last visit indicated anything. That offered a modicum of comfort.
"I understand, Emma," Regina croaked and shook her head. Somehow she pulled herself back from the precipice Emma's confession pushed her towards. This was temporary, she reminded herself.
"I'll content myself with stories and pictures of blue ribbon moments until you deem our relationship stable enough for a visit," she continued once she'd regained her confidence and collected her scattered emotions.
"Thank you, Regina." Emma smiled up at her and then wiped her other leg.
"There you go. Silky smooth," she informed her triumphantly and patted the sticky calf.
"Thank you. I had wondered if poor Ruby would be forced into this when my tolerance for the itchiness reached its limits." Regina chuckled and allowed Emma to pull her to her feet.
"I'm happy to do it when I'm here," Emma said sincerely.
Regina's forehead throbbed with emotion, but she withheld comment as Emma undressed her and helped her into the tub. She probably could have done this without any help or relied on Ruby's wolf strength for support, but Regina's paranoia kept her from attempting anything of the sort. Emma made her feel safe, though, as she always had. They should have taken baths and read to Annabel, and Emma should have attended the first appointment when she'd heard Annabel's heartbeat. They were robbed of that. Ruby and Belle made wonderful substitutes, and their unwavering devotion and love and support held her together as she worked through the anger of Emma's absence. But they were just that, substitutes.
Emma undressed, snagged the book and settled behind Regina. It felt good and natural to have Regina's weight pressed against her without anything but water molecules separating them. The last of her fear slipped away when Regina cupped water and spread it over her swollen breasts and belly as one might a beached dolphin. Emma's chest vibrated with silent laughter, and Regina swatted the bent knee at her hip and readjusted her head against Emma's shoulder.
"Regina."
"I feel it."
"It feels like…"
"Like you're still carrying my heart."
Emma jerked as the voices filled her mind in a cacophony of hushed and jumbled whispers that sounded far loud than they should have. She grabbed her head at the sudden pain, nearly dropping Jane Austen in the water. Green eyes slammed shut as she breathed through the sharp stabs of agony. Regina jerked up and knelt awkwardly between Emma's knees.
"Emma!" Quaking hands took the book, dropped it to the floor, and covered Emma's hands over her temples. Emma breathed deeply as the flashes ebbed and her vision returned to normal.
"Emma?" Regina tried again. What the hell just happened?
"I'm okay. I've been getting these flashes, like I'm trying to remember something that I'd forgotten. I'm either going insane or I need to get a brain scan. Maybe both." Emma explained in a gruff voice and rubbed her temples with the heels of her hands.
"What sort of flashes?" Regina asked, excitement in her voice. Emma glared up at her. Regina was the oddest woman she'd ever met.
"Regina," she said in a tone that made Regina instantly sober. What had Emma remembered?
"Who the hell is Cora and why do I remember you standing over her bloody body?"