Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Chapter 10

JPOV

I woke up with a start and bolted upright in my bed. Fuck! Another one of those nightmares. I thought that I was over them as I didn't have any recently. When my racing heartbeat slowed I glanced over at my nightstand to check the time. I still had 5 minutes till my alarm clock went off. I laid back and relaxed for the remaining time. I let my thoughts wander freely about any topic that popped into my tired mind. The first thing that I focused on was little Alice. She had a tendency to pop into my thoughts quite unexpectedly.

I found myself thinking about her more often recently. I wasn't stupid, I knew that she was developing a crush on me, but at least she was discreet about her feelings unlike other girls at school. I didn't understand them at all. When I moved here their sudden interest in me was quite understandable, I was the shiny new toy that everyone wanted to play with. Maria used to say that girls liked me because of my good looks. Yeah, right! There was nothing special about me and the scars on my arms and body only added to my ragged appearance. Oh, Maria… Maria and I had a very um… interesting relationship that was mainly based on physicality. We used each other's body to feel good for a little while, to get way from our reality that was anything but. She had a similar background that I had, and we used sex as a tool to get away, for instant gratification. She had never minded my scars as she had her own ones.

After a time the girls' interested in me had cooled down, except for Lauren of course. Jesus, that girl was a fucking skank! Sometimes I feared my life because of her as she turned into this stalker slash groupie kind of girl who followed me everywhere. It didn't make a difference to her whether I was rude or nice to her so after a while I simply learned to block her and her ridiculous antics out. However, the second wave of interest in me was much unexpected. When the new students arrived I heaved a huge sigh of relief as all the attention was turned toward them. It didn't last long. I was hoping that as there were two new guys in the school Lauren's unwelcome affection would be placed on either of them. No such luck! Once she even told me that it was my last chance to take her out as Edward was very much interested in her so I simply wished her all the happiness in the world with her new victim.

However, later I learned that it was a lie as Edward was clearly only interested in Bella. I quite liked her, she was a quiet girl never one to pry, and I appreciated that in her. Through Alice's insistence I had became part of a group for the first time in my life and I became friends with them all. Back in Texas I had always been with Maria and two people don't exactly make a group. Emmett had a very easy going nature so he easily accepted me into their group. However, recently I noticed his hostile attitude toward me. I guess it was because Alice's feelings for me. Edward wasn't as openly hostile as his brother, but it was clear that he was suspicious of me. When I couldn't bear the adverse atmosphere during lunch I offered Alice that I would go back to sit alone. At first I was worried because of the heartbroken expression on her face, but she insisted that I sit with them and as so many times before I found myself unable to deny her anything. After this incident her brothers changed their attitude and only a little tension remained. Edward was the first, besides Alice, to make a conscious move to befriend me. It was nice to have a friend with whom I could discuss serious topics, too.

And I came full circle. Alice. My friendship with Alice was different from with anyone else. It was complicated because of her obvious feelings for me and because of my own conflicting ones. I couldn't deny that Alice was a very beautiful girl and I was quite attracted to her. I mean seriously who wouldn't be. But besides her physical beauty I found that she possessed an equally stunning inner beauty. She was very kind and generally nice to everybody. She had a cheerful atmosphere around her that I enjoyed. It was so rare that someone had this happy and joyful aura around themselves. But her personality was one of the very reasons that intimidated me. She was a beauty inside and out and she shouldn't waste her time on someone as fucked up as I was. She deserved someone much better, but I had a feeling that convincing her about this wouldn't be that easy. I quickly learnt that she could be really stubborn if she wanted something. The most frightening thing about her was how readily I trusted her. I wasn't a very trusting person; I had never had reason to. The only person I had ever trusted was my grandfather, he had saved me after all. But Alice somehow wormed her way around my defensive walls without my realizing it. And like all the other things about Alice I found myself loving this new feeling of trust. That beach trip had changed everything; I had opened up to her more than anybody else. It was nice talking a little about my mother, however, the mention of that bastard of a father had ruined everything.

I was hoping that with time Alice feelings would fade because I had no idea how I would react about her becoming open with her affection. I didn't think I had the power to reject her. She didn't know a lot of things about me and I wanted to leave it at that. There were things that she was better off knowing nothing about, and my close association with her would only darken her innocence. I just wanted to keep her optimism and cheerfulness alive. It was a double edged sword. I knew that her usual cheerful mood was dampened by her feelings for me that she thought were unreciprocated, but I couldn't let her find out about the secrets of my past, that would broke her. I wanted to protect her from that.

When my alarm finally went off, it roused me from my darkening thoughts. I got up and went to the bathroom on the end of the hall. I took a shower and went downstairs to prepare breakfast for both of us. I wasn't one for huge breakfasts, a simple clif bar was sufficient for me, but as grandpa took several medications he needed food for them to take effect. So I made him eggs and bacon when I heard that he was heading to the kitchen.

"Good morning!" I greeted him. "Sit down! Breakfast will be ready in a minute!"

"Thanks, son!" He said and sat down in his usual chair.

When the food was ready I put it in front of him and he immediately dag in. I sat down across from him and ate my bar with a cup of coffee. I always needed coffee to get me going in the morning. We ate in silence, neither of us was big talkers. Today he had to go to the doctor for check-ups. I usually took him, but today I had to go over to the Cullen's to work on our project with Alice. As I felt uncomfortable with disrupting their family dinners I made a deal with my boss at the Diner. On every Wednesday I could get off earlier, he was very lenient with me because I always worked conscientiously plus he knew my grandpa very well. Before I left for school I reminded him once again about his appointment at which he just smiled saying that he had remembered.

I arrived to our fantastic school and parked my motor at my usual place at a safe distance from everybody else. I glanced around the parking lot and when I saw that Alice hadn't arrived yet I headed for the building. I usually didn't wait for her because I didn't want to encourage her or give her false hope about me. I didn't know how successful that was. I headed for my first class, my favorite: History. I sat down and I started to read a book I had recently purchased about the Civil War. Soon I was so absorbed in my book that Alice's was startled me.

"Good morning, Jasper!" She greeted me with her trademark smile that always made me smile back at her.

"Hey, Alice!" I simply said. I saw that she was dressed in a very flattering green dress that really brought out the emerald hue in her eyes. She was breathtaking, but I refrained from commenting on it, but my lingering look might have given my liking away.

"So are you coming over today?" She asked the eagerness clear in her voice. I saw Edward shaking his head in the background. I didn't know whether it was at me or at her, but I didn't really give a damn.

"Yeah, at the usual time." I said.

That was all of our morning conversation as the class started and as usual I gave my whole-hearted attention to the subject. I had third period free as I was quite fluent in Spanish. What can I say? I was from Texas where Spanish is like a second language. So I spent that period in the library. I took out my notebook and started sketching out the contours of a face that soon turned into the familiar features of little Alice. It seemed my subconscious was stuck on her while my common sense knew better.

When I went to lunch the others had already been talking about their plans for the weekend. It was their usual Saturday date night as they had called it. I didn't always go to these events although I did enjoy the movies and the company, but I couldn't help the feeling that Alice was expecting something from these evenings especially after the beach trip. I thought if I didn't show up every time that would help her get over her crush on me. Well, judging from the expression on her face it wasn't working. I sat down with a sigh and Alice immediately turned to me.

"Hey, Jasper!" She said enthusiastically. "We were talking about plans for the weekend. And we decided that we were bored with always staying in Forks."

"We?" Edward arched an eyebrow at her.

"Okay, so I was bored." She said and stuck her tongue at his brother. I enjoyed their light banter, must have been nice to grow up with siblings. In my case that would have been disastrous.

"So what do you have in mind?" I asked a little shyly. I didn't particularly want to dismiss her idea as I hadn't gone over last week, but I needed to know what kind of crazy idea popped up in her clever little brain.

"What do you think about bowling?" She asked. "Because Emmett had said that the bowling arena in Port Angeles was pretty good and I wanted to check it out." She emphasized the I in her sentence with a sideway glance to Edward. But soon she turned her hopeful eyes on me. I could never say no to those gorgeous puppy-dog eyes.

"Alright, I can go after work." I relented. Alice's answering squeal was deafening and caused for a couple of heads to turn in our direction.

"She was going on and on about how much she wanted to go. She was a real pain in the ass." Emmett stage whispered to me. But stopped when a bread roll hit him in the head. A courtesy of Alice.

He rubbed his cheek as he said. "I don't know why you are so excited, you can't even play that well."

"I deemed it time to learn it properly, besides it's your fault that I can't play. You had never taken the time to teach me." Alice retorted with an accusing glare.

"Alright, I give up!" Emmett replied raising his hands in a sign of peace.

After grinning in triumph at him she turned back to me. "So Jasper we decided to go in one car to save gas and of course to save the planet." She giggled at her own little joke. "And as Emmett's jeep can easily sit six people we are going to pick everybody up with it." She started to explain. "So where should we pick you up at the Diner or at your place?"

If I go with them, there wouldn't be enough time for me to go home. Beside I didn't want her to know where I lived as although our house was nice the neighborhood was anything but. Alice lived in the rich part of town while we lived in one of the poorest neighborhoods. Plus it was in the opposite direction from Port Angeles.

"From the Diner." I replied. "I live too far to make it in time." She frowned at my statement.

"Is it alright if you can't go home before we leave? I wouldn't want to take you away from your grandfather." She said in concern.

"It's really alright. Don't worry!" I assured her with a smile. Like everything else about her, her concern was a foreign feeling to me. No one had ever felt concern for me before except of course my grandpa.

The rest of the day went on in a similar manner. Work was as usual, but unfortunately for me Lauren and her friends walked in and it still wasn't time for me to leave. I sighed and went to their table. Lauren in her usual careless manner touched my arm and I jerked away from her. I wasn't comfortable with strangers touching me, but this bitch had no concern for personal space. I served them everything they had ordered while trying to tune out their ridiculous flirting. Lauren was batting her eyelashes at me and I was tempted to ask her whether she had a seizure or something, but I kept my mouth shut and endured it. At least I got nice tips from them.

And soon I found myself in the parking lot of the Diner preparing to leave for Alice's. As a habit I had just texted her that I was on my way. When I arrived I was no longer surprised at how quickly Alice had always opened the door for me.

"Hello, Japer!" She greeted me with the usual dreamy little smile plastered on her lovely face. She was always so happy to see me.

"Hey, Alice! How are you?" I couldn't help smiling back at her. Her happiness was quite contagious.

"I'm good. Come in!" She stepped away to let me walk in.

I greeted Mrs. Cullen and Edward who were in the living room and followed Alice up the stairs towards her room. I noticed that she was wearing a pair of very short shorts that accentuated her cute little bottom. Well, that was a view! So what if I checked her out? I was a guy so sue me… However, I quickly banished such thoughts from my brain.

In her room I immediately noticed two changes. One, she had a new sofa installed in, and two, the drawing I once had given her was now framed and hung up on her wall. I raised an inquiring eyebrow at her while nodded in the picture's direction.

She blushed a beautiful shade of pink. She wasn't as an easy blusher as Bella, but on occasion she did it, too. "What?" She tried to play it down. "You know how I liked that picture." She said and quickly changed the subject. "You know, I haven't seen any of your recent drawings." She hinted, but I wasn't about to tell her that my new favorite topic was her face and especially her eyes. So I just shrugged my shoulder.

"You didn't want to see them." I said simply.

"Oh, Jasper!" She had an indulgent expression on her face. "I always want to see your pictures. You are very talented. I love your creations."

"Thanks." I mumbled, well she was a bit biased. I could never be as good or as talented as my mother had been. My mood immediately darkened at the thought of her, and Alice noticed, but thankfully she didn't pry. I really appreciated that although she was curious she had never pressed for more information. She simply waited hoping that I would open up to her a little more about my family. I knew however that wouldn't happen if I could help it.

We worked on our project and I noticed that Alice was getting better and better in this "silly boys playing war" topic as she so affectionately called it. She must have checked out those web pages that I suggested. I was very pleased with her progress and decided to comment on it.

"Well, Alice, I see that you have done quite a research in this field. You are becoming an expert." I said gently with a smile.

She blushed and giggled at my compliment. "Thanks. It really is very interesting. I would never have thought!" I had to chuckle at the complete wonder on her face. We made good progress with our project. The teacher was quite impressed with our theme and gave us full rein.

Soon we finished the homework and I rose to go home. Both Alice and her mother tried to convince me to stay for dinner, but politely I declined mentioning my grandpa. I didn't particularly like leaving him alone. I knew that he was used to it as he had been living alone a long time before I moved here, but still I really liked him. It was such a new feeling to me that I couldn't completely understand it yet. I wasn't used to affection of any kind, and that was also a reason why Alice confused me so much. She knew next to nothing about me still she liked me for an unknown reason.

When I arrived home I found grandpa dozing off in front of the TV, but he woke up at the sound of the door clicking shut behind me.

"Hey, grandpa! How are you? What did the doctor say?" I asked quickly.

He smiled at my eagerness. "I'm good. All my results were as they should be at this age." He said then continued with a sparkle in his eyes. "Well, actually Dr. Brown wasn't in as he had a family crisis and Dr. Cullen examined me instead."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "So how was the new doctor?"

"Oh, he was very nice just like his wife and daughter." He winked at me. Ever since we met them one Sunday morning he always looked for opportunities to mention Alice to me. "Oh come on, son! That's a very lovely young lady who is clearly smitten with you!" He said unable to contain his excitement any more.

"And when did you start in the matchmaking business?" I asked sarcastically.

"I just think you should get out more. Spent time with people of your age." He said the concern sweeping in his voice. He was still worried about me, and I guess he was right to be. I hadn't got over my past and I didn't know if I ever would be. Grandpa noticed that my thoughts turned toward darker topics than at hand and he desperately wanted to pull me back.

"Why don't you give this lady a chance? Maybe she could make you happy." He suggested quietly.

I snorted sarcastically at him. "Yeah, right. And I would be the perfect boyfriend for her."

"Maybe, if you give her a chance she could…" I didn't let him finish.

"Both of us know the difference between Alice and me. She is too good for me. Soon she would find someone else who is better suited for her." I said with conviction. I couldn't fathom the idea of someone as good and beautiful as Alice would be seriously interested in me. It was all a little crush; she created a picture about me in her head that had nothing to do with the real me. She would soon get over me.

Grandpa just sighed and dropped the topic.

Soon it was Saturday afternoon and work was crazy. I texted Alice saying that I would be a little late, but she answered that they would wait for me in the parking lot. I was about to go to the back to change my clothes and get ready when I saw Alice walk in the Diner. When she noticed me her eyes lit up with happiness and her beautiful pink lips curved up into a smile.

"Hello, Jasper!" She greeted me a little breathlessly.

"Hey, Alice! I was about to go to change so I will be out in a couple of minutes." I told het.

"Oh, ok. I just came in because Emmett started to become a little pain in the ass." She huffed at her brother. "Also he wanted a milkshake."

When I stepped out to the parking lot I immediately saw the huge jeep that belonged to Emmett. It was a very suitable car for him. He honked his horn and leaned out of his window to shout at me.

"Finally, dude! Now that you finished your beautification we can finally leave!"

I heard the distinct sound of a slap and a quiet 'ow' and I knew that Rose had the situation under control. Not surprisingly in the car I was sitting next to Alice. Not that I minded. During the ride to Port Angeles conversation freely flowed between us although I mostly was quiet. It was still a little weird for me to be with so many people at once.

When we arrived to the bowling arena Bella and I joined the queue to rent shoes as the others had their own. I used that day's tip for that purpose. As we were walking toward the others we could hear Emmett and Alice were engaged in an argument. Bella and I exchanged an amused look.

"So what happened here?" Bella asked Edward as she went to his side.

"That's just my siblings." He said and looked at her lovingly. However, Alice felt the need to elaborate more.

"Emmett wanted to have a competition between boys and girls. But that's not fair when I can't even play properly." She said quite agitated.

"I don't see the problem." Emmett said with a grin in his sister's direction.

"I can't play either." Bella said quietly.

"Oh, then come and I teach you." Edward offered very eagerly. Emmett's booming laughter broke the natural buzz of the room.

Before I could stop myself I blurted out. "Alice, if you'd like I can teach you quickly." Alice's answering smile was dazzling, but then her face quickly fell. "Are you sure?" I could tell she was trying to play down her excitement.

"Yes, I'm quite sure." And as I said it I knew it was really true.

I guided Alice to the practicing line and showed her how to hold the ball and how to pull it out. It was amusing to watch little Alice struggling with ball that was too heavy for her, but she managed just fine. However, she couldn't hold the ball long enough so it just slipped out of her hands too early which made her shots too weak to score anything. When she made another attempt, without thinking I walked up to her and stood right behind her putting one arm around her waist and the other helped her hold the ball. I heard her gasp, probably a result of my sudden appearance.

"Let me show you." I whispered in her ear. I felt as she went limp in my arms letting me guide her. I was quite surprised at myself. I didn't feel tense or uncomfortable holding her so close. I had already noticed at the beach that Alice's touch always felt really nice, the urge never came to move away from her. Maybe it was because her touch was a sign of her affection and nothing else. I had never felt threatened by her, she always made me feel peaceful which was a very foreign feeling to me, but I found that I enjoyed it very much.

At this point I was standing so close to her that there weren't any space between our bodies. I helped her lift the ball and guided her through the right technique to shoot. She was very quiet as I explained her the right moves and the rules. After a while I realized that my standing so close to her might had become inappropriate and as I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. So I let go of her and stepped aside. I heard a faint groan coming from her.

"Now it's your turn to do it on your own." I said softly to her while indicating the alley to her. She lifted her eyes to meet mine and I sucked in a quick breath. Her eyes were wide and an impossibly dark shade of emerald green. I knew that look. It was lust. I hadn't realized that my closeness could have that effect on her. I meant I knew that I stood way too close to her, but I had no idea that that would turn her on so much. And I found that I wasn't as unaffected by her arousal as I had initially thought. She looked magnificent standing there her pupils dilated, lips slightly parted and her whole body language showed that she wanted my touch. I found myself stealing glances at those pink lips. We still stood relatively close to her, it would only take me to drop my head a little and then I could taste her. And suddenly like a bolt of lightning I realized that I wanted to do it, I wanted to kiss her so I started to lean in, but a booming voice interrupted the moment. I was quite grateful for the interruption. What the fuck was I thinking?

"Hey, man! How did you manage with the pixie?" He asked in a good mood having no idea about the moment he had just disturbed. I cleared my voice and quickly composed myself.

"It went well I think. With a little more practice she would be perfect."

"Well, then it's time for a competition!" He cried and walked back to the others. Alice stood right where she was not moving an inch. She had composed herself somewhat, but still had a dreamy far away look in her eyes. I had no idea what could have been running trough her head. I nodded my head in the direction of the others silently indicating that we should join them. Finally Emmett had his will and we formed two teams I was in the team with Alice and Edward, and to Emmett's dismay we had won, but my heart wasn't in that game. All I could think of was that almost kiss earlier. I had to be careful, if I didn't watch out I would soon find myself in love with little Alice.

PS. So that was Jasper's point of view. It was probably different from what you had expected. I'm not really sure about this chapter so let me know what you think. I can always continue it in just Alice's point of view.