Requested by MasterShorty.
The crowd began to cheer as Bayonetta walked on stage in a leather leotard.
"I'm ready for this." Bayonetta smiled. "No one can resist me!"
"Hello there fine judges!" Bayonetta said as a worker moved a large pole next to her. "How are you doing?"
"G-good." Mew stumbled. "Don-don't you th-thin-think-"
"Don't I think what?" Bayonetta asked.
"It was suggesting that maybe your outfit is a bit to…skimpy." Dark Pit said.
"Don't be ridiculous!" Bayonetta said as she shook her hips. "My outfit is fine! Now. I'm going to perform a special dance and song for you!"
"Wait a second…" Micaiah blinked. "Are you going to…pole dance?"
"Is there a problem?" Bayonetta asked as she put her leg up on the pole and pulled herself up. "Anyways, the song I'm going to sing is called 'Born this Way.' Now then. Let's on with it, shall we?"
"Woah, woah, woah, woah!" Dark Pit cried as Mew covered its eyes. "Let's take it slow and steady…"
"Too late!" Bayonetta smiled as the music began to play and she climbed to the top of the pole and struck a pose.
"Wait…" Micaiah said as an electric guitar solo finished up. "I don't think-"
My mama told me when I was young. We are all born superstars. She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on. In the glass of her boudoir "There's nothing wrong with loving who you are" She said, "'Cause he made you perfect, babe"." Bayonetta sang as she moved down and struck some poses.
"It's OK." Micaiah whispered to Mew as Bayonetta continued to dance on the pole. "It not getting sexual."
"Not yet anyways." Dark Pit muttered.
"Be quiet!" Micaiah hissed as she nudged Dark Pit. "You'll scare it even more!"
"Alright then." Mew said as it took it's paws off its face. "I'll watch."
"I was born this way!" Bayonetta declared as she did a flip.
"Don't be a drag, just be a queen." The chorus sang as Bayonetta used her magic to take off the entire top half of her leotard, leaving her chest completely bare.
"Oh." Bayonetta smiled as she slid down the pole. "Is there a problem?"
"I'm sorry." Dark Pit hissed. "When did I start watching porn?"
"You aren't watching porn." Bayonetta smiled as the bottom half of her leotard disappeared leaving her but naked in front of the crowd.
"Really?" Dark Pit asked as Mew began to hug Micaiah and cry. "Because I sure feel like it!"
"Why is that?" Bayonetta asked.
"Oh I don't know…maybe it's because A NAKED WOMEN IS IN FRONT OF ME!" Dark Pit screamed. "Seriously. What the hell. If I wanted to see a stripper, I'd go to a FUCKING BAR! And you've seen to forgotten that THIS IS A KIDS SHOW!"
"Then why are you cursing up a storm?" Bayonetta questioned.
"It'll be beeped out." Dark Pit said. "Now then. LEAVE THE STAGE!"
Bayonetta exited the stage in a huff.