Guest 9/26: You're right she's definitely not mature enough; she might not even be mentally stable enough for a child. But like you said, teenage pregnancy happens in real life. Don't worry, this story won't glamorize it. It'll just be reality. As for the food situation, Rick didn't really take either side. He felt like they were both wrong. He was going to arrest Chenelle and scolded Olivia. It's okay that you don't like her with this fandom who knows how long she'll exist.

KK: Carl isn't innocent himself. He's proven himself able to kill in cold blood. His attraction was from knowing what she was talking about and knowing he wasn't the only one. Either way, he and Rick are in a like father, like son situation: their ability to kill, and their taste in women. I don't agree that he should let go of his friends, but he needs to be willing to let Michonne and his kids in. I think you'll like this chapter.

Guest 9/27: I definitely understand if you stop reading the story. Find My Way Back is dark! It's just kind of weird that chapter 9 was the chapter to push you to the limit. Previously I wrote Rick sodomizing his brother to death and Michonne killing a puppy. Teenage pregnancy is fluff in comparison.

candycandy111: Remember in season five when Michonne said "You can be out here too long..."? Rick was out there too long.

Guest 9/28: I really think you'll enjoy this chapter. Despite her quirkiness you can empathize with her. Rick's decisions didn't just effect his family. From her perspective, it ruined her future.

Chapter Ten: To Grady and Back (Part One)

Rick woke up to see Michonne sleeping next to him. Every time he woke to her next to him it amazed him. This was reality. He'd spent two years trying to find his family. Maybe there was a God. To find his family not once, but twice? Nobody was that lucky. The world was not small. He knew that firsthand. He'd searched five states essentially on foot. Nothing stopped him; it was all that mattered. It gave his mind time to develop the happiest and also the darkest hypotheticals to the location of his children. Every time he had doubts of their survival, he'd remember who he'd left them with. There was nobody like her. Michonne was a survivor. She'd saved their lives many times over. Carl listened to her; he respected her. In the past, Carl respected Michonne more than his father! Rick debated whether or not that fact was still true. Michonne was an angel in Rick's mind. Her image kept his nightmares away, kept the depression away, gave him hope to continue looking. Eventually he realized how gorgeous she was. Her image had morphed from an immaculate angel to his sexual fantasy. Occasionally he'd relieve himself with plans of what he'd do when he found her. He imagined her as many things. He imagined his family in different ways. Now that he was in Alexandria he realized the way he imagined Carl, Judith and Michonne were simply that, an imagine.

They didn't look they way they did in the past. Carl was nearly his height now, his hair was shorter and tidy. There was no attitude like before and even though Rick could since uneasiness when they were alone, Carl didn't hate being with him. His son worked a lot so he barely saw him. He didn't understand why Carl didn't stay in the house, but at least he was staying inside the walls. Judith changed the most. She was more of a child than a baby. She was such a beautiful girl. Rick couldn't believe he had the opportunity to watch her grow. He'd keep her alive. He'd lost her too many times. Lastly, Michonne, she didn't look the way she did in the past. Her locks were much longer and very neat. She had scars. It wasn't just her physical. Michonne smiled more; she had other friends. She also wasn't the moral compass he thought she was. And although she mothered his children, she didn't reserve herself as his wife. Rick caressed her sleeping face. He grinned to himself; he certainly solved that problem. He got rid of his competition. The only people in the way of Rick and Michonne were Rick and Michonne. Rick knew his actions were wrong, but he couldn't find himself to feel bad for it. Having his family, his family including Michonne as the matriarch, made his two years of hell worth it.

Michonne woke up. She was very irritated. Rick had no concept of personal space. She always woke up to Rick staring at her, touching her, or deliberately waking her up. "If this thing is going to work, you're going to have to trust me enough to sleep through the night."

"I do trust you. I trust you with everythang."

"Everything, but you."

"It's not you Michonne."

"I know it's not." Michonne turned to him. Her face was serious. "Stop forcing this."

"Michonne-"

"Stop forcing this."

"..."

"I already said I'd try. This has a chance, we have a chance. But it's not going to happen overnight."

"You're right. I'm sorry." In his years of knowing her, they'd spent more time separated than together. But in his attempts to keep her close, he was steadily driving her away.

"So why'd you wake me?"

"...I was just thankin' 'bout the times I thought about you to keep my sanity." Michonne's lips moved into a brief smile. That was a trait they both shared. "Are you still seein' me?" Rick asked, referencing the time he caught her talking to the hallucination of him.

Michonne shrugged. "Not since you've given power back to the Monroes." Rick wanted to mention that it was proof that she loved him. Of all the people Michonne could have conjured -Mike, Andrea, Daryl, Hershel- she made him. "I don't know why I'm still doing it. You're right here. You've stopped. I should have stopped too."

"It's different. I came to everythang I wanted. My kids were alive and you were single."

"Not exactly."

Ignoring her comment, he continued. "Your lifestyle changed. You're not used to me."

"You're not used to me," Michonne countered.

"No. I'm not."

"..."

"Remember the way were were before?"

"...I think about it everyday."

"Me too."

"You saved my life, Rick. You gave me a home. Family. Friends. And even when we lost it. I knew..." Michonne thought about a tragic new year's. She remembered everything about that day: the leader's plan about raping her and Carl, being molested by one of the men, watching as Carl was almost raped, getting trapped at Terminus, telling Carl about Andre, and her moment with both Grimes men. That day was unforgettable:

"You okay?"

"Yeah"

"I'm okay."

"I know."

"How"

"'Cause I'm okay, too."

"I meant what I said three years ago. I was okay, so I knew you were okay. We were- I don't know. I really don't know, but whatever it was it was why I never doubted that you were alive. I was good. So I knew you were too."

"What happened to us?"

"Stuff," Michonne said vaguely. She looked at him with a serious expression. "A lot of things happened."

"Ain't it weird. Before Grady, before Atlanta, you were my left hand. I didn't have to worry about anythan' if you were tasked with it. We didn't talk much, but we didn't have to. We were just that connected. You knew my grief. You knew my rage. You knew me. And I needed you. Carl wasn't responding to me; he only listened to you. We'd just lost everythang. But no matter what it was you were ready to do it. That night... The night those bastard tried to rape you and my boy. When I did what I had to everyone froze, but not you. You didn't hesitate. Even before Daryl..." Rick brushed one of her locks out of her face. "You held Carl and helped him when I couldn't. It was always you... When we were apart I felt so stupid that I never saw that you were supposed to be more than with me. You should have been my wife." Michonne realize he was doing more than just speaking. He was asking. "You should be my wife."

"...don't rush this."

"I won't. No, I'll try. But I want you. I need you. I can't see anything else."

Michonne's heart tripled its beats. Rick could feel how hot she'd got. He smirked that he'd made her blush. He saw her body continue to respond to his touch. Rick moved closer to her. Michonne's nipples hardened and pushed against their sheet. Rick cupped her breast and kissed her neck. Michonne shuddered. "Be gentle."

"Teach me how."

Michonne nodded and closed her eyes. "Just continue touching me, like that. When you get to my pussy, don't touch it dry." Rick pulled her against his body. She could feel his erection press against her. At first she thought Rick would flip her over and fuck her into the mattress. He was always a desperate lover, taking her fast and hard instead of taking his time. This time she was wrong. Rick kissed her neck and used both hands to fondle her breasts. She melted from the feeling of his rough hands over her body. He began to explore her, his hands traveled from her breasts down her stomach, her hips, and thighs. He rubbed her thighs and lightly pulled them apart. He scooted closer to her, pushing his hard member against her. He was throbbing in anticipation. He back was against his abs and pecs. She knew of his strength and started to give in to his new-found affection. He wouldn't ram into her tonight. It was something different.

Michonne turned to face him. Rick looked at her gorgeous body and then her face. They kissed each other. It was slow. Rick was shaking; he was burning with desire, but he couldn't let it take him. Rick was starting to realize that he didn't have to. He didn't have to be savage and brutal. He could finally relax. He was with her. He was safe. They were safe. He could let it go. A tear fell from his eyes. "I love you."

"Stop it." Michonne begged.

"I do." Rick insisted placing her on her back. He kissed her neck and stared at her scar. More tears fell. He placed his lips over it.

"No," Michonne whispered.

"I'm sorry."

"..."

"I would have never let it happen." Michonne tried to pull away. Rick pushed her back on the bed. "It would have been different."

Michonne touched his scars. She felt the same way. The madness they'd gone through apart. It would have been different if they were together. Michonne would have been observant enough to stop Jeff before he almost killed Tara. Rick wouldn't have let Michonne get ripped apart. The other horrors they'd gone through, they both believed it wouldn't have happened. Michonne didn't want to hear anymore. It was too much. Michonne felt her own eyes prickle. She didn't expect to feel; she didn't want to. She knew that she'd asked for this, but she wasn't ready. She wanted to go back. "Just fuck me." She positioned herself for him to push inside. "Just fuck me."

Rick felt his head rub against her moist folds. He thought about how good it felt to bury himself in her goods. He almost forgot the situation and obliged. Instead he placed his hand down there. He felt the opening of her folds; he wasn't even inside and could feel her wetness. Rick remembered Michonne's advice and lubricated his fingers with her own juices. Michonne squirmed. She was feeling impatient and anxious. Rick kissed her chest and used two of his fingers to feel her. He couldn't see; timidly he searched for her clit. Rick ran across, then past her nub. He went back and moved against it cautiously. Michonne pushed herself against him. She cried out when his mouth latched on to a swollen nipple. He was trying to please her two different ways. His movements were awkward and without rhythm or skill. Michonne opened her eyes to see his. She could read every emotion in his face. She saw his vulnerability, the fear, and his sincerity. He wanted to please her. He wanted to love her. He started to succeed.

Michonne pushed her hips into the motion of his hands and felt pleasure shoot down her legs. She moaned, encouraging him to continue. Rick rubbed her harder now substituting his two fingers with the top of his hand. Michonne kept looking in Rick's eyes. She trembled. Rick continued to persist; Michonne continued to assist. As they worked together Michonne started to feel feel a familiar tension and electricity build within her; she erupted into an orgasm. Rick could feel her walls quake. Her eyes rolled back and closed. She fell back on the bed and weakly reached for Rick. Rick rubbed his aching cock and slowly pushed inside of Michonne. She tensed; her walls contracted even more. Rick groaned from the feeling. He was sure he could cum just from Michonne flexing her walls around him. He felt more relaxed now that he was inside of her. It had been a while since he'd had to perform sexual favors and foreplay. He could do this though. Michonne grabbed Rick's neck and moved her hips on his dick. "Christ, Michonne. Fuck..." Rick matched her movements. They rode each other until Rick threw his head back and came inside Michonne.

Rick caught his breath and lay next to Michonne. Michonne was starring at the ceiling. It was silent. Their minds were racing. A lot had happened that morning. They were different. Rick felt as if they were official; Michonne finally accepted that there was something there. Although they still weren't on the same wavelength, it was a start.

Suddenly, they were jolted up by loud banging on their door. Rick motioned for Michonne to stay back. He grabbed his pants and went towards the door with his gun. Whoever it was outside started ramming their door trying to break it down. The weakness Rick had shown Michonne had died the moment he stepped into the living room. Rick heard a weird choking sound outside his door. It sounded like a mixture of coughing and wheezing; it was a baby's cough. Rick lowered his gun and instantly opened the door. Tyreese barreled into their home with wild eyes. He cradled Judith in his large hands. Carl brought her to Tyreese's house before his shift since they were all working that day. Something had happened. Judith was gasping for air. She was scared, but was unable to cry. She reached for her father, weakly. Her lips and fingers were blue. Rick was mortified.

"JUDY'S HAVING AN ASTHMA ATTACK!"

Michonne and Rick sat in silence as they watch their little girl sleep. Michonne had managed to give Judith her emergency inhaler. After lying with Judith in the rescue position, they all began to breathe easy. For a countless time, Rick found himself amazed with Michonne. She was calm when he and Tyreese panicked. She saved Judith's life again. It made him wonder how many times Judith had an attack with Michonne. Michonne mentioned Judith was a sickly child, but he was just realizing what she meant.

"I know that's hard to picture because you've never seen her starve; you've never seen her face swell from ant bites; and you've never seen her gasp for air when she has an asthma attack!"

"..."

"You could see her ribs when we got here. She needed medical attention, not a haircut. So no, I didn't care what happened to Jessie, Ron, or Sam. Only me and mine." Before he could protest she cut him off. "I was attacked by a wild pack of dogs. My wounds kept reopening. The ones Gabriel stitched filled with pus and got worse. It needed surgery. Guess who did it?" She forced Rick to look at her. "You must like Jessie a lot. Otherwise you would see it from my perspective."

He was starting to understand her a lot more now. It also began to sink in that he'd killed the only doctor. He'd gone so long without one that he'd forgotten how invaluable they were. Rick had a sick child and he'd killed the only doctor.

"I messed up, Michonne."

"..."

"I really messed up."

"We'll get through this."

"No. No, we won't. Not like this." Rick wanted to punch something. "What if we run out of her medication? You say she's allergic to something."

"Ants."

"Jesus Christ..." Rick thought about how many ants were in their yard at that very moment. "I really fucked up."

"I know her medications."

"It's not just that. You know it's not just that. What if something happens. Not just Judith, but anyone. Accidents happen everyday. Maybe a virus sweeps through here, like at the prison. Shit, what if... What if you're pregnant?"

"..."

"You could be pregnant right now and I killed the only doctor in Alexandria."

Michonne thinks about his words. "We do have newborns around here. I think the pills are now gone. We might have to do another run for condoms. But those are no longer foolproof either. The ones in our dresser expired three years ago. We might have a population increase soon."

"Or decrease. Lori, their birth mother, died in childbirth."

"...Sex is dangerous." Michonne was quiet for a while. "We were late because we ran into a rouge group. They got Rosemary and we went to find her. And we did... They were running a brothel full of women and children, dead and alive. Someone must have, someone must have raped a walker right before raping her. Cause when we found sick from the infection. The ones we saved were so traumatized they didn't trust us enough to come to Alexandria. I've never been happier to kill." Michonne shook her head. "Daryl put her down so she didn't have to turn. It's so fucked up that something like this could happen to anybody, especially someone I know. It's even more fucked up that I'm very relieved that it wasn't me."

"..."

"..."

"I have an idea. You might not like it."

"What?"

"I know of a place with a doctor." Michonne already knew what he was about to say before he said it. "If Grady is still running we can take him, bring him here. He's their most valuable member. We'd have to kill everyone there, what I wanted to do initially, then we can take him. He may resist at first, but he'll adapt or die." Michonne was deep in thought. "Well?"

"We've got to try. I'm with you. I'm going with you this time."

"No. I want you safe. I want the kids safe."

"We aren't separating again. We just aren't. Tyreese, Carol, Sasha, Abraham," she made Rick look at him. "Glenn, Maggie, Daryl. They'll protect our kids. We'll figure it out. Plus we have to make sure this goes smoothly."

Rick was amused. "And you're the person for the job?"

Michonne rubbed Judith's hair. "This trip will be different. We don't let it happen again."

Rick still didn't like it, but he wouldn't argue with Judith sleeping next to them. Unsure it was true, he copied her. "We won't let it happen again."

Later...

After discussing thing for two weeks they finally prepared for their trip to Grady. Rick, Michonne, Daryl, Tara, Noah, Aiden, Aaron, and Nicholas. Were chosen to make the trip. Michonne lied to the Monroes saying they would discuss bringing everyone back to the community. Rick was happy to have her. He was a blunt man, but Michonne knew how to finesse them. Because it was supposed to be an act of diplomacy, Aaron and Noah were supposed to come. Even though Noah's mother was against his leaving, she allowed him because his mind was made up. Nicholas and Aiden were supposed to help with security, but Rick already wrote them off as decoys. His only concern was his circle: Daryl, Tara and Michonne.

Carl and Judith were to stay with Tyreese or the Rhees. Even though Carl wanted to go they didn't relent like Noah's mother. He was staying in the Safe Zone. It was important that he did. It was safer; plus he was one of the only people who knew how to give Judith her medication when she needed. Carl scowled, but had no choice, but to accept it.

Deanna threw a party to wish the crew good luck on their mission. There was food, music, and alcohol. Everyone from the Safe Zone that wasn't on guard duty was there. Abraham was showing off his sons, while Rosita laughed about something with Tara. When Abraham started drinking she left with the twins. Tara drifted, but stared at her companions most of the time. Carol was still trying to keep the Safe Zone facade despite revealing her true nature when Rick took over Alexandria. Rick and Michonne were there. They sat and watched others dance and converse. Eyes kept locking with Rick's. The last party they had Rick had killed Pete.

Rick looked at the Andersons. Ron was with the other teenagers including his son. He wasn't sure how that was happening, but knew Carl could handle the oldest Anderson son. Rick smiled, 'like father, like son.' Sam was shadowing Daryl, much to the archer's annoyance. Rick was surprised Daryl came. Perhaps that was Carol's doing. She was cunning like that. Lastly, he saw Jessie. She was talking to Olivia when she saw him looking. She gave him a bright smile and waved. Rick looked at her curiously before returning that smile. He waved in return. Rick stopped when he felt a strong kick to his calf.

Judith laughed, "Da-dee make a funny face!"

"Daddy is acting funny, huh?" Michonne said cryptically.

Judith nodded happily. "Silly da-dee!"

Michonne glared at Rick. "Silly daddy."

"Jealous?" Rick asked. Michonne was not amused. She scooped Judith and left the table. "Michonne. Michonne!" She ignored him and took Judith to the dance floor. Rick watched with a large smile on his face. Judith jumped up and down as her dance. Michonne held her hands and swayed her arms to the beat. They mirrored Chenelle who was dancing with her dog. As usual she wasn't with the other teenagers. The black teenager was smiling brightly though. She was wearing a beautiful red dress and her hair was wild with curls after taking out her braids. Whatever her problem was, must have been over thought Rick.

Rick didn't tire of watching his family live life. Michonne helped Judith with the Cha Cha Slide, Electric Slide, and Wobble. Many people joined the dance floor when they came on, but Rick wasn't one of them. Lovumba by Daddy Yankee played causing Chenelle to scream in delight, forget Smythe, and dance by herself while screaming every lyric.

Once it was eight, the party began to slow down. So did the songs. Baby Come To Me by James Ingram and Patti Austin began to play. Rick perked up. He knew this song. It made him flashback to the days when his mother would watch a taping of her favorite soap, General Hospital. For the first time that night, Rick got up. He ignored the eyes on him and approached the swaying Michonne. Judith was in her arms; they looked at him curiously. Judith was silent from sleepiness. Michonne was waiting.

He swallowed and touched her arm. "Would you like to dance?"

"I am dancing."

Rick rubbed his stubble and looked nervously away from Michonne. "I meant with me."

"I know." Michonne nodded. "I'll dance with you."

Rick wrapped his arms around Michonne's waist. He positioned himself to make room for Judith. Michonne started moving to the melody. Rick closed his eyes and listened to the music. It was insane how well a song from the past could relate to the way he was feeling now. Just like the song said, he wasn't going to go back to living without Michonne.

Meanwhile, Carl had been noticing Chenelle the entire night. She never made any attempt to look at him. She didn't even speak. Mikey noticed Carl looking at her. "Chenelle's kind of hot isn't she?"

"Insane, but yeah, pretty hot." Ron agreed. Enid rolled her eyes. "Grimes obviously thinks so."

Carl blushed. "It's not like that." It was. He didn't have romantic feelings for her, but he thought she was very attractive.

"You should ask her to dance."

"No."

"You're punking out?" Carl's so called friends laughed.

"I'm not scared of anything. It's just... she hates me."

"I'm sure she doesn't hate you."

"Yeah, that's like impossible on her end." Enid said. Her crush on Carl had been obvious to everyone who wasn't Carl. "I dare you."

Carl looked at his friends with slight hate before giving in to peer pressure. Chenelle had been on the dance floor the entire night with Smythe. She looked different to him. She was radiant, glowing. The dress was very loose on her, but only reach half of her thigh. Seeing her in the red dress made him remember the night they shared. Her hair was also different. She had long uniformed curls. They stayed out of her large brown eyes. They seemed not to focus on him even as he walked closer to her.

"Hey." Chenelle looked toward the ground. She saw him, but didn't want to respond. "Would you like to dance?"

"Your parents are staring at me."

"Really?" Carl turned to see Chenelle was correct. He turned red. "Fuck, this is awkward."

"It's okay. Sort of too late though considering..." She looked him in the eyes matter-of-factly. "Considering that we've already done it."

Carl blushed harder. Every time he thought moments with her couldn't get more embarrassing, she'd do something to prove him wrong. "You really didn't need to clarify."

"N-no, I did. Because after it happened I thought we were going to be boyfriend and girlfriend. But your dad took over ASZ and you forgot about me. Don't worry, I'm used to it."

"I didn't forget about you."

"Yes, you did." Chenelle put his arms around her waist and rested her head on his shoulder. "And I'll never forgive you for it. Never ever."

"..." They danced together; they were full of tension, confusion, and mistrust. "So is it true you're staying with the Andersons?" He found it odd that Chenelle would move in with the Andersons; it was even stranger that he didn't know about it until now. Not the logistics, Chenelle didn't have many belongings so it would be easy to hide. Ron told him that Chenelle and his mom were training the dogs together. He wondered why Chenelle didn't tell him herself?

"I've been staying here for eight days now. It's not my fault you didn't know."

"You could have told me."

"You could have seen me before eight days passed!"

"I see. You're right about that."

Chenelle slowly backed away from him. "I'm sure Mikey is throwing a party at the spot."

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"..."

"I think I know why you're mad at me, but you have to talk to me." Chenelle folded her arms and stared at him. "I don't get why you think I'm avoiding you. You know where I am. I'm at home. And if I'm not at home, I'm working at the wall. And if I'm not working at the wall, I'm in the garden. And if I'm not there, I'm at the school teaching the kids how to hide or defend themselves from walkers."

Chenelle couldn't deny that. His work ethic was one of the reasons she liked him so much. "But still-"

"You work too," Carl said interrupting her. He walked closer to her. "And you go to school; you work in the garden too. Now you're training the new dogs. You know we have to do these things to survive. Don't hate me." He could see the tears forming in her eyes. It made him feel bad. As much as he wanted to be there for her, his work would come first. He held her hand. "I don't want you to be sad anymore."

"I dropped out of school," she revealed. "All I wanted to do was be a doctor. But that can't happen now. So I have a lot more time now," Chenelle hugged herself. "I'm alone again. You know what solitude does to a person? And now y'all are making me do it again. I-I needed you. I needed you. I need you. Yes... No... No. I need Gabriel. He was always, always... Why can't I move on? He's gone. He's gone. He's gone. He's gone."

Carl shook Chenelle and forced her to look at him. "Focus. I know it hurts. He was my friend too. But you're still here. Remember that."

"If I told you that if that happened to Michonne what would you tell me?"

Carl was silent. He never thought about that. Chenelle walked away from him. Carl went to his parents. They had two days before they left. He would make every moment count.

(A/N) I always thought I'd be done with this before season six started. I was sooooo wrong.

Next Chapter: Part Two