-Paul POV-
"I can't believe you got with Julissa Haze." Thomas said, the quarterback of our schools football team. It honestly made no sense as to why the fuck we had a football team, no one liked football and we barely had enough players for a team. If one person got hurt our team would be finished.
My best friend, Jared Thail, snorted. " Of course he did. Paul can get any girl in this school." I never really spoke about my hook ups with various girls in the school.
One: because they didn't matter, sex was sex. As long as you were safe and consenting it was fine, fun and natural.
Two: I never wanted it to get back to Diem.
The best thing in my life was Diem Lilac.
My best friend and love of my life.
Diem Lilac was the purest person in the entire world, she understood every part of me before I even knew it myself, she was the only person that could make me laugh and calm me down. I couldn't even count the amount of times I had been talked down from bashing some assholes face into lockers for trying to get into my Diem's pants.
Of course all my past fuck buddy's had gotten back to Diem be cause La Push was so fucking small, but it never phased her. She never treated me as a disgusting human being; like I sometimes thought I was. Of course the girls that I did have flings with knew what they were getting into when I was involved it didn't stop them from pursuing me. In the beginning of this Hugh Hefner prodigy persona I pursued girls who I knew had certain reputations.
"Dude," Kian Sawyer spoke lightly punching my arm.
"What?" I asked taking a sip of my Coke.
"Tracy lye is staring at you like you're a piece of meat." He and the other guys at our cafeteria table busted out laughing. I rolled my eyes.
Tracy had tried several times to hook up with me but she didn't have the right attributes. Her ass was bony, her tits were the size of nectarines and her legs were short and stubby. She was nowhere near my type and based on the ratings a few guys at the table have given her she wasn't worth me switching up my preferences.
"That girl never gives up." Jared said laughing along with the rest of the guys.
The guys continued to talk about all their conquests and I listened in but couldn't help but be distracted-like always. I looked around the cafeteria and hoped that for once, Diem would come in here. I was out of luck. I looked at the time and saw that there was 20 minutes left of lunch and decided to do my check up. Sometimes I felt bad for her, I knew I was 99% of the reason that she was always bullied by other girls and it annoyed me. Girls were so fucking stupid to think they could talk to my best friend like she was a zoo animal and think that made her any less perfect in my eyes.
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I was at Diem's house for our usual Wednesday movie night cooking her spaghetti. She was at the hospital for some unknown reason and was taking quite awhile to get her ass home. Her parents were out so I helped myself to doing the dishes and setting a plate.
When I finally heard the door open I couldn't stop the smile that crept to my face. When I went to go meet her I instinctively knew something was wrong.
"What's wrong, Diem?" I said making my way to her in record time. There was nothing I wouldn't do in this world to protect her from anything that could possibly hurt her.
"Nothing, don't worry about it Paul," she said turning away so I couldn't look into her eyes and walked away to hang her coat up. I clenched my fist. She and I both knew that I knew something was wrong. Diem wasn't like most girls- she only cried when something was really really really bugging her.
"Then why are your eyes puffy and your eyelashes wet?"
She gave me some bullshit excuse and smiled. I internally rolled my eyes, I didn't think any women could ever have me wrapped around their finger, but Diem was able to. Her smile allowed her to diffuse the topic of conversation and we went to eat. During Dinner we had the typical banter that was always so natural between us but I could still see that something was really bothering her.
"Hairspray?" She said looking up at me once we finished eating and went into her living room to start the first movie of the night.
"You have got to be kidding." I said hoping my features displayed exactly how I felt about that movie- and every other musical for that fucking fact. I braced myself for the next movie that I knew she was going to ask about.
" A Walk To Remember?" Knowing she was about to do her infamous puppy dog eyes I looked away and shook my head.
After the continuous back and forth I finally caved like the little bitch I was when it came to Diem. We got comfortable and I put my head in her lap like always. Most of the time I let her watch whatever she wanted because I got so distracted just being so close to her. I wish I knew what the fuck it was about her that was so magnetic to me. She was memorizing.
Admittedly, being in such a close proximity to her my imagination would run wild and it'd be very difficult for me to act calm when she'd lick her fingers from certain snacks she was eating her when she would laugh and her chest would move in a hypnotic way. Safe to say, I had to excuse myself.
Once the movie was over, Diem got up to get popcorn and I went to the bathroom. Most of the time I hooked up with girls because of the horrible need to feel needed. But lately I hooked up with them because my hormones around Diem were getting wildly uncontrollable. Once I finally got myself under control I opened the door just as I heard a crash in the kitchen.
"Diem? What happened?" I said frantically, trying to see if she hurt herself. she had her hands covering her face as she stood in front of me sobbing. I gently pried her hands from her face and brought her closer to me.
"What's wrong baby girl?" I said after a few minutes of non stop tears. I couldn't take it anymore. I picked her up and carried her to the kitchen. At this point I didn't care what it was, I just wanted her to know that I was here for her- that I would always be here for her. Having her cry in my arms for an hour straight stuck something deep inside me and almost caused me to cry along with her. I mustered all the strength I had to be strong for her and kept all the emotions I could in check.
Once she told me the cause of her tears I immediately felt a rush of anger strike my body. I shot off the couch and felt my body shaking. It was like all the forces of the earth was shaking me except the world wasn't moving. Only I was.
"What the fuck! How the fuck could this be happening?" My mind couldn't get a grasp. How in the fucking hell could the world be trying to take the last good person in the world left? It didn't make any fucking sense. It wasn't fair! If I lost Diem I would have nothing.
"Paul you have to calm down." Diem said in a calm voice. How in the fuck could she be calm? I was fucking fuming. She was okay with leaving me? With leaving her family? It didn't matter to her whether she lived or died. In that moment I felt hate. I couldn't tell if I felt hate for her, for the situation, or for the world but I absolutely loathed everything.
"HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EXPECT ME TO CALM DOWN WHEN YOU TELL ME NEWS LIKE THAT? HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF I WAS IN YOUR POSITION." I yelled furiously at her, something I had never done. My body started shaking more and I continued to look at Diem as if this was her fault. My vision was literally wavering every second because I was shaking so hard, I started feeling little parts of my insides expanding-
The door burst open and suddenly Sam Uley and Jared wrapped their arms around me and dragged me out of the house. They continued dragging me, I fought my hardest to fight back so I could get away from them but it didn't work all it did was make me angrier. As soon as we approached the forest I felt my entire body expand. The entire thing felt like my body was expanding and being shredded all at the same time. It was so incredibly painful that my eyes closed. When they opened again everything around me seemed brighter- which was fucking weird since it was night time. Everything around me seemed enhanced like I had just been watching the world through and television in the 1960's and now I had an HDTV. The vividity was beautiful.
"Well Paul, Welcome to the wolf pack." Sam's voice rang through my head.
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It took several days to wrap my head around the legends not only being true but the fact that I was a fucking werewolf. It was cool, it was sad, but most of all it was aggravating. My emotions were also enhanced along with my vision and that just meant that the deep anger that I had to keep at bay on an emotional basis was even stronger.
I also felt horrible because I hadn't seen Diem since pro- phase and she had just told me such a life changing thing. My Diem. My best friend in the whole world had Ovarian Cancer. How in the fuck was I supposed to be strong for her if I couldn't be near her. Everytime Sam thought I was ready to attend school I'd think about seeing Diem, and then think about what the world did to me, and phase. I had already gone through 6 outfits and 2 pairs of shoes.
"I know it's difficult but you really need to be there for her. She hasn't been in school for days." Jared said while we were running Patrol on Monday night. Instantly I felt a punch to my gut. And whined.
"Thanks bro, I already feel bad enough."
"Instead of thinking about the cons think about all your good times. She does have a good chance of surviving you know. Especially since they caught the cancer early." Jared continued to list the good things and it eventually started making me feel better.
"Thanks Jared, " Although Diem would forever hold the title of being my best friend I knew how lucky I was to have Jared in my life also.
Tomorrow I was going to school.
Tomorrow was the day I would stop being a bitch and be there for the one person that was the reason I was still alive.
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Sam suggested that I got school just as the bell rang instead of coming early to chat with my friends or flirt with girls. That way no one could potentially piss me off and I could do what I was set to do. I opened the doors just as the bell rang and in my peripheral I saw Diem. I couldn't look straight at her, it would only kill me to see her face. I had been such a terrible friend to her I wanted to cut off my own nut. I couldn't believe I had left her by herself. I could feel the anger start to well up in my chest.I decided I'd go to my first few classes and come to terms then talk to her at lunch. That way if I phased I'd have called Sam for backup.
I took a deep breath and walked passed her.
"Paul! What the hell is going on?" She yelled. I kept telling myself to ignore her, and that I'd talk to her later so I had nothing to worry about. "Wow some best friend you are. I basically tell you I'm dying and you just ignore me? What now that im going to be gone quicker-" I couldn't take it anymore. I was pissed that this fucking werewolf thing happened, I felt like I had just been punched in the balls. Was that really what she thought?
"Look I-" I couldn't speak anymore. Once we made eye contact time stood still and it was as if I felt the ground below me shifting. Everything made sense, the pull I had towards Diem, everything.
Sam had told me about imprinting and I was sure that there would be no one out there for me. And I didn't want anyone if I couldn't have Diem. Sam had said finding your imprint was like finding your perfect match, but that couldn't be true. Diem's perfect match should be someone more like Jared. I was too angry, too damaged to give Diem what she needed.
Fuck that.
If the spirits chose wrongly and gave me the pleasure of being tied to Diem my whole life I was not going to correct their mistake.
This girl was mine.
Forever and every day after.
A/N: HEY GUYS! SO sorry this took so long but I kinda wanted you to see Paul's side of things to give you more insight about their relationship as well. HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT!
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