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Lia

Sam refused to talk to me on the way back to his house. I knew Sam like the back of my hand. I knew that when he was mad he yelled for a while, but then he cooled down and felt bad for letting the temper get the better of him. When Sam had his feelings hurt he didn't talk. He gave the person who hurt him the silent treatment, and Sam's silence was worse than his yelling.

"Sam, don't be mad at me," I told him glancing over at him.

He just shook his head.

"Sam, I don't like Cruz. I love you, just don't get mad at me, please."

He didn't say anything, he turned into his driveway.

Once he shut the engine out I opened the door to get out, but he sighed a sign indicating that he would talk.

"Why him. Why do you want him, Lia? You know you can't have him, so why him?" He asked not brave enough to look at me.

"Sam, I don't-"

"Don't you dare tell me that you don't want him! He's the enemy, Lia, and you want him."

"Sam I love you, I swear. It's just that Cruz needs me."

"Why does he need you?"

"I'm his math tutor."

He rolled his eyes, "Lia, this is about algebra. You ran to him, you tried to catch him!"

"He fell! I thought he was hurt."

"Whatever Lia."

"Sam, I'm sorry. Just don't be mad at me."

He sighed and his voice was calmer, "Lia, I'm not mad at you. I'm scared for you. I feel like I'm the only thing that is holding you back from going to him. What if something happens to me, what if we break up, what if I move? Then what are you going to do, go run to Cruz Fuentes and become an enemy. Go against your family, go against me."

I felt the tears start to run down my face, "Sam I love you. Cruz will never change that, I love you. You have to believe that."

It was true I loved Sam. Sam was my first love, the only love in my life. I loved him in that moment, I did. I didn't love Cruz, I thought he was cute. I thought he was interesting, I thought he was different than any other boy.

"Fuck, Lia. Don't cry, you know tears break me," Sam said and reached up and wiped a tear that was rolling down my face.

"Sam you gotta believe me, you gotta believe that I love you. That is something that I would never ever lie about. I love you Sam."

He sighed, "Lia, I know you're not lying. I love you too."

He kissed my forehead gently and got out of the car.

When we got into his house he collapsed onto the couch, "I got some stuff tonight, some stuff for the Blood."

I raised my eyebrows, "What?"

I usually didn't ask questions about the blood because I didn't want to know what was going on, but then again Sam didn't tell me when he was doing stuff for the Blood.

"Some kids are getting jumped in."

I shook my head not bothering even to speak.

He sighed, "Lia, you know I don't like doing it, but I have to."

I nodded, "The kids getting jumped in, they're my age right?"

Sam nodded, "Most of them."

I laughed.

He cocked an eyebrow, "What's so funny?"

" I guess in a way this is the way that we're told we're growing up. Once the boys you grew up with in the neighborhood get jumped, were told that we're no longer kids. The guys go out and pick fights with other gangs, and the girls become sluts and try to seduce the newly bad boys. The girls wind up pregnant, and the boys are stuck with them-"

Sam cut me off, "Lia, you're rambling. Just stop rambling and breath. Wait, are you telling me your pregnant?"

I looked at Sam and rolled my eyes, "No, I am not pregnant, idiota."

Sam sighed and patted the seat on the couch next to him, "Sentarse, you're making me nervous."

I walked over to the couch and sat down next to him. He pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arm around me, "What's this all about? What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying that I don't want to be stuck here my whole life. Sam I love you, and I really want us to have a future together, but I don't want to be sucked into the way of our people. I'm smart I can go to college and do something in my life."

Sam looked at me like I was crazy, "Lia who ever said that you couldn't go to college. I know you're different than other girls around here, that's why I love you. I don't want a girl who will trick me into getting her pregnant. I want you a smart, pretty girl, who only let's me have sex with her if she knows that we have a condom somewhere."

"Sam, that's the problem. What if I do get the money to go to college, so I become a lawyer or a doctor or something, but Sam you'll just be a gangbanger. I love you, I always will, but I don't see how a lawyer can be the wife of a gangbanger."

I expected Sam to yell at me but he just ran his fingers through his hair, "Why are you so smart? Lia, you still have two years of high school left after this year. Why can't we just wait until we get there to ask what's going to happen. Why can't we just have these two years together, no complications."

I nodded, "Yeah, okay, two years that's a long time still. Two years, that's like 730 days—"

Sam cut me off again by putting his hand on me knee, "You're rambling again."

"I know, I ramble when I can't think straight. I can't think straight right now-"

"Lia, shut up," Sam said cutting my rumbling off once more.

I threw my head back defeated and ended up hitting it on the back of the couch, "Shit."

Sam laughed at me and I couldn't help, but laugh too.

For that minute I forgot about Cruz. I knew the only way Sam and I could spend forever together is if he somehow got out of the gang. Only one person ever got jumped out of the Blood and lived, Alex Fuentes. Alex bore scars all over his body from the jumping out. I could never do that to Sam, never. I'm pretty sure Sam would stay true to the Blood forever, I just had that feeling.

Cruz may have been the enemy, but really whose enemy was he. Was he my enemy just because I dated Sam? I hated the Blood like the Blood hated Cruz. So doesn't that make Cruz and I allies and Sam my enemy?

Why are boys so difficult?