Chapter 10: A Terrifying Jokester
You nervously look at the screen of your phone, biting the bottom of your lip with apprehension as you see the time displayed. It is four thirty PM… In your determination to not be late, you have accidentally arrived thirty minutes early. Although you are sure that it is okay to be a little early, thirty minutes might be pushing it.
'Oh no…' Is all you can think as you glance back and forth from the phone and the door. As if looking at it again will magically change the time to something more acceptable. Door… Phone… Door… Phone… Door… Phone… It is now four thirty-five PM. But this isn't because of a miracle. This is because you have been silently standing in front of Papyrus' house for five minutes while internally panicking.
You glance behind yourself, passed the driveway and the two mailboxes, all the way to the empty road. Maybe if you leave right away, you can make it back to your house and wait for a few minutes. Even as you think about this option, you know that it is ridiculous. By the time you would make it back to your house, it would be way past the time you were supposed to arrive. Then again, you could always phone Papyrus and say that you are too sick to come. That isn't a complete lie… After all, you are feeling sick in your stomach right now.
Your leg twitches and you turn your body, getting ready for a mad dash down the driveway. But before you can make another move, the door suddenly opens and a smiling skeleton lets out an enthusiastic, "NYEH HEH HEH! HUMAN BESTIE, YOU HAVE ARRIVED JUST IN TIME!"
Turning around with surprise, you can feel your heart threaten to burst out of your chest. Pink-cheeked and trying to appear as casual as you can, you cross your arms and utter an obviously uncomfortable laugh. "H-heh... Haha ha… Y-yeah." What is he talking about? You are clearly way too early. Papyrus should be upset with you and demanding to know why you think it is acceptable to be… You steal a quick glance at your phone. It is four forty PM. Twenty minutes still seems much too early to you. Unless you are remembering the time wrong and the get together starts right now.
"ACTUALLY, YOU HAVE ARRIVED EXTREMELY EARLY FOR THE GET TOGETHER." Papyrus amends himself, resting his hands on his hips with a smile.
In one sentence, he has managed to clear something up and confuse you at the same time. So, you did get the time right. But why does he seem to be so happy about you being, as he eloquently put it, extremely early? "Is that… a good thing?" You ask, subconsciously beginning to reach for a strand of your hair.
Before you can grab it, your arms are suddenly pressed against your sides as Papyrus enthusiastically picks you up. Your eyes widen with shock and your legs automatically give a few feeble kicks as they search for solid ground. But the ground is a long distance away, and past experiences tell you that you won't be feeling it anytime soon. Your fists clench as your body stiffens with embarrassment at how ridiculously easy it is for Papyrus to pick you up.
Too excited to notice your discomfort, Papyrus just yells, "OF COURSE IT IS A GOOD THING! ARRIVING EARLY MEANS THAT YOU WISH TO SPEND EVEN MORE TIME WITH ME! WHICH IS TO BE EXPECTED AFTER ALL, BECAUSE WE ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST OF BESTIES! I ALWAYS ARRIVE EARLY WHEN I AM INVITED SOMEWHERE. MY FRIENDS LOVE IT!"
Honestly, you aren't sure whether that is true. People don't normally like it when guests arrive too early. Then again, whoever Papyrus' friends are must be used to his overabundance of energy. Surely, they expect that kind of behavior from him. Maybe they purposely tell him a later time than the other guests, that way when he arrives early he is actually on time. 'That's actually a pretty good idea…' You think, making a mental note to do this if you ever invite the skeleton to your house.
Turning around, Papyrus walks back into the house while effortlessly carrying you. He even repositions you so that he can support you with one arm while shutting the door with the other. Your face begins to cool down as your embarrassment slowly fades away. Although you still feel small, you can't help but notice that Papyrus always seems to know how to hold you so that you are incredibly comfortable. A foggy memory of him mentioning how he carries his brother around all the time, flashes through your mind.
'I guess practice does make perfect.' You think with an amused smile.
"HUMAN, ALTHOUGH I AM GLAD THAT YOU HAVE ARRIVED EARLY… THE DINNER IS NOT YET COMPLETE AND I AM AFRAID I MUST LEAVE YOU ALONE ON THE COUCH." Papyrus says apologetically as he walks over to the couch and carefully sets you down on it. From the way he slowly places you on the cushions, someone would think they were made of rocks instead of fabric. "PLEASE, MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE WHILE YOU WAIT FOR THE OTHERS TO ARRIVE. MY HOME IS YOUR HOME!"
Smiling at him, you say, "I will Papyrus! Thank you so much…" You end up thanking his back because he is already excitedly racing back to the kitchen. The faint aroma of smoke comes from the room, but you don't hear any distress from the skeleton. Whether or not this is a good thing, you aren't entirely sure.
Chuckling softly, you start to look around the room. Spotless houses always put you on edge. They make you feel like you are an intruder in a forbidden place. Somewhere that no living thing is supposed to see. Luckily, this house is anything but spotless… Books are scattered on the coffee table, video game controllers are laying on the floor in front of the television, various stains dot the carpet, and a few discarded soda cans suggest what most of the stains are. All in all, it feels warm and inviting. Messy enough to show that the house is lived in, but not so messy that it is overwhelming. Although, the bottle of ketchup on the coffee table is a little strange.
Raising an eyebrow, you tentatively reach out and poke the bottle. It is a little over half-way full… Deciding to leave the condiment alone, you glance at one of the thicker books on the table. "Quantum Physics?" You mutter with confusion as you open the book. But as soon as you flip the page, you realize that it is a joke book. A few more flips and suddenly it is a quantum physics book again.
This continues for several minutes before you finally decide to just close the book with a sigh. Lowering your head and rubbing your temples to try and get rid of the headache forming, you internally debate whether you had been looking at a quantum physics book or a joke book. Another pressing question flashes in your mind, causing your head to shoot up and your hands to shoot down. Whose book is it? Papyrus doesn't seem like the kind of person to read a book about quantum physics. You feel a twinge of guilt at that thought. Perhaps there is more to him than meets the eye and you are simply jumping to conclusions. After all, it wouldn't be the first time you've underestimated someone… Besides, there is a fifty percent chance that it is a joke book. Someone as cheerful as Papyrus would certainly enjoy a good laugh.
"Maybe it's his brother's…" You ponder out loud, wondering what kind of person… skeleton, he is. Is he a genius or a jokester? It seems like your question will soon be answered because the sound of a door opening reaches your ears. It sounds like it came from the hallway. That must be where the brother's room is.
"SANS, YOU LAZYBONES! YOU ARE FINALLY AWAKE! QUICK, GO TO THE LIVING ROOM AND SAY HELLO TO MY HUMAN FRIEND." Papyrus' voice calls out from the kitchen, accompanied by the banging of pots and pans. The smell of smoke begins to get stronger, mixing with the aroma of tomatoes. It is interesting to say the least.
"tibia honest, i think i'd rather go back to bed." A deep voice drifts from the hallway, causing you to narrow your eyes with confusion. You know that voice… But you can't seem to remember where you heard it. Whoever it is, they certainly don't sound thrilled about having to meet you. In fact, their tone has a hint of bitterness.
"NO, NO, NO! YOU WILL NOT GO BACK TO BED! YOU WILL GO TO THE LIVING ROOM AND BE NICE TO MY HUMAN BESTIE AND THEN YOU WILL BECOME BESTIES WITH HER AS WELL! I MEAN IT!" Papyrus retorts, emphasizing how much he means it by slamming a lid down onto a pot. "ALSO, PLEASE REFRAIN FROM MAKING ANY MORE PUNS. I DO NOT WANT YOU TO SCARE THE HUMAN AWAY WITH HOW BAD THEY ARE!"
"alright pap, but i'm insulted that you think my puns are bad. my puns are the cause of many wonderful skelle-brations. heh, heh, heh…" Sans replies, the bitterness becoming replaced by slight amusement. But as he grows more relaxed, you can feel your entire body tense. You remember where you know that voice from.
"it's you." Sans says in a hard tone, his voice suddenly coming from behind you.
You flinch with surprise before slowly turning around. A shiver runs down your spine as you look into two, black eye sockets. Void of even a glimmer of light, the darkness seems to pierce through your very soul. Air crackling with tension, a minute of silence passes with neither of you looking away. Honestly, you aren't sure you could look away if you tried. With a racing heart and sweaty palms, you finally manage to stammer out in a hoarse voice, "I-it's you."
His eye sockets narrow and a dark shadow seems to fall over his face, causing you to cower slightly. "yeah, it's me… now that we've covered that, how 'bout you tell me how you know my bro? don't even think about telling a fib-ula, because i'll know…" He says in that same serious tone, slowly walking over to sit down on the couch. He reminds you of a predator on the hunt, stalking his prey.
At least you have your answer... Papyrus' brother is a jokester. A terrifying jokester, but a jokester nonetheless.