Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Fullmetal Alchemist nor do I claim to.

See chapter 1 for trigger warnings.

Yaoi (sort-of) warning for this chapter.

You guys all make me so happy with your awesome reviews. *-*

Chapter 10

Expanding horizons

Ed stayed for a little while after our talk, and convinced me to brush my hair and teeth. I realized I really let myself go. It was a little embarrassing after the fact, but he didn't really seem to mind. Given the circumstances, this is the happiest day I've had in a while. Ed and I are officially dating, and I make a mental note of today's date.

"I have to go, Envy. I have homework to do, but I think we should all get together tomorrow to play some tunes." Ed looks up at me, but I have trouble letting go of him.

"Yeah … okay." I say with a pout. I was about to ask if I can help him, but thinking about it I probably wouldn't be a very good study partner. I recall all the times he was supposed to be 'studying' when he was really with me.

"Practice has been pretty lame without you, and I had to practically force Kira to come because she was so distraught over you not being there." Ed looks like he was forcing himself not to roll his eyes. Was Kira really that upset over me?

I look a little surprised, and then instantly regretful since I ignored all of her calls. I just couldn't deal with anything or anyone with the way I was feeling. I'm sure she understands.

"Don't worry about her, En. She'll be good as new as long as you show up tomorrow." He seems to catch the emotion on my face, and boops my nose. Ed smiles reassuringly at me and gives me a quick peck on the lips before turning to go.

I'm determined to make Ed happy. Ever since he agreed to be in a relationship with me, I am terrified every minute that he will get tired of me.

I go back in the apartment feeling a little down, thinking I don't want to wait until tomorrow to do something. I can't just sit around doing nothing, I've been doing plenty of that recently.

I still don't have a job.

My subconscious reminds me Ling is taking care of all the bills by himself. Sometimes I don't know why he puts up with me.

Letting out a sigh to myself, I decide to take a walk to clear my head.

The sun is shining, and there's lots of people everywhere. I don't like crowds, but it's sort of a daily occurrence in this city. I can't really avoid it, so I just ignore the noise and bustle as much as I can as I make my way toward the park.

I sit down on a bench and look down at the green grass. It's a little quieter here, save for the people biking or randomly running by with their dogs.

I squint in the sunlight as I see a figure jogging toward me that I recognize. I think it might be Kira.

"ENVY!" She squeals and jogs right for me the second she spots me. Well, at least she doesn't seem angry

"Hey, Kira." I smile weakly at her and let out a small whoosh of air when she roughly embraces me in a hug.

"I heard what happened with you and Ed. I tried to call, but he said you needed time alone." She looks sad and I reflect her emotion.

"I'm sorry. I just couldn't ..." I trail off and look to the side.

She seemed to understand and sits next to me.

"I would have warned you about him if I had known. I kind of had suspicions, though." She giggled softly.

One corner of my mouth curls up in a lop-sided smile. "Am I that obvious?" Then my face falls. "I'm not sure what I've gotten myself into, Kira. I told him he doesn't have to change for me, but I'm not sure I meant it." I admit suddenly to her. She's the only one I can talk to about this.

"Oh." She frowns. "He seems really fond of you. Besides, I haven't seen him with anyone else since he met you." I perk up a bit at her words. "He also never brought any of his other boyfriends home, if that counts for anything." Kira gives a small shrug of her shoulders.

"I guess. I had a feeling he slept around a bit but I didn't realize how much." I put my face in my hands and heave a sigh.

She rubs my back. "Ed's a dog. We all know it, but he's such a good guy you can't help but like him anyway." She's not really making me feel better, but I don't let on.

"I know what will cheer you up!" Kira grabs my hand and pulls me to my feet and I give her a skeptical look. "We're going shopping."

She drags me along towards the mall and I groan. Great, more crowds.

We end up in the middle of a place called 'Bloomingdales'. My eyes are bugging out of my head as I see all the prices. Are these guys joking with this stuff? Is it made of gold or something?

Kira brings me to the men's section, and I frown at the immense selection.

"So, what do you like?" She gives me an expectant look.

I merely shrug. I really don't know.

"Oh c'mon, you've got to like something. You want to impress Ed, right?" She grins at me.

I nod, though I've never been one for fashion. I always hate the way I look anyway, so why bother?

She suddenly grabs my shirt and pulls it tight so she can see the line of my body. I gawk at the invasion of space, but I figure she's the expert not me.

"You are so skinny!" She gapes at me, and I scowl.

"So I've been told." I sound grumpier than I meant to. It's just that Ling always complains about me not eating enough and getting thinner and blah blah blah.

"I'm totally jealous." She says but there's a smile on her face. "I think you would look much better with form-fitting clothes. You have such a nice figure." She lets go of my shirt and beams at me.

I look down at my clothes, realizing they are sort of baggy. I'm expanding my horizons here.

"Maybe I should wear something that would fit in with our music." I make a suggestion as I start to look around.

"Great idea." She nods.

My eyes wander, not being drawn to much of anything until I spot a top that looks like it could be worn off the shoulder. I go over to it and touch the soft fabric with my fingers, tilting my head as I inspect the garment.

It doesn't even occur to me that I had wandered into the misses section.

Kira is laughing her ass off behind me, and I turn to glare at her as I take the top off the hangar and hug it to my chest.

"What?" I demand, and she laughs harder.

"Nothing, Envy." She smirks at me and I start browsing through the selection of jeans. I don't know that skinny jeans are really my thing, but I grab a few of each kind. Bell bottoms make me think of the 80s, so maybe these things that say 'hip-huggers' will work.

After my arms are full of different clothes, I manage to find the changing room.

The lady at the desk just in front of the stalls gives me a weird look when she sees what I picked out. "How many, hun?" She asks me.

"Eh... three, I think." I had one top and two pairs of jeans.

"Mmhmm. Here you go." She smiles oddly at me and hands me a hanging number for the stall.

Why is everyone acting so strange?

I try on the first top I found, and I instantly love how it fits. It's black, and the sleeves bunch up a little and end mid-forearm. I put it off my shoulder, exposing the pale flesh over my collarbone. I then pull on one of the jeans, realizing perhaps I'd picked a bit too small of a size when I can't even get them past my thighs. I struggle a little to get back out of them, and tried on a slightly larger size I'd picked out.

These fit perfect. They're the 'hip-huggers' I'd seen, and they certainly do that. They are a little … lower than I'm used to, and they end well below my navel. Luckily the top is just long enough to cover my stomach.

I shyly open the door to my shall and peek out to see Kira standing there waiting patiently for me.

"Are you finally done? Let's see it!" She seems really excited. More excited than I am, for sure.

I slowly inch my way out and stand just outside the door.

Her hands are thrown over her mouth and she stares at me. Is it horrible?

"You look so sexy!" She claps her hands and rushes up to me to inspect my outfit first-hand. She pulls on the top to smooth it out more, and continues to admire me.

I snort. "Well I do feel kind of sexy." I deliberately swing my hips to the side and it sends her into a giggling fit. I feel like a completely different person in these clothes.

Putting my hands to my hips, I watch her laugh. Well, I guess I'm kind of having fun too.

"Okay, now that you decide you like it, I need to tell you something." She pokes my chest and I rub the spot and pout at her.

"What now?"

"Envy, those are girl's clothes." She nods her head indicating to what I'm currently wearing.

I say nothing, I just stare at her. Girl's clothes. Of course. It would be just like me. Everyone thinks I'm a girl anyway. I groan and slump to the floor in a defeated heap.

Kira rushes toward me and shakes my shoulders. "You look SO good in them. You can't even tell. They hug your body and the style is so flattering for your figure Envy," she insists, trying to reassure me but I'm too busy sulking.

"Do you think Ed would like it?" I ask her hopefully after a few moments of woe-is-me.

"There's only one way to find out!" Kira chirps and stands, extending her hand to me. "Let's just get that set you're wearing now, and we can always come back later for more if it works out." She grins at me, and I take her hand and get to my feet.

I really hope I'm not spending the last dollars I have on these just to have Ed laugh at me too.

After we finally manage to check out and leave the store, I walk out onto the sidewalk wearing my new clothes. People are looking at me, and I can't tell if they are judging or admiring. Shrugging it off, I say good-bye to Kira and walk home.

Walking through the front door to the apartment, I meet a wide-eyed Ling.

"Whoa, Envy. Someone must be feeling better, huh?" He pats my shoulder—the one that's actually covered in fabric—and grins widely at me.

"Yeah. Ed came to see me." I admit, and feel my face heat up when I say his name.

"Oh." He doesn't seem pleased. "If he even thinks of breaking your heart again, I will wring his scrawny little neck." Ling threatens, getting a particular gleam in his chocolate eyes.

I put my hands on his arms, and smile at him. "I'll be okay. Thanks, though." Then I hug him. Same old Ling, as always.

"Please tell me I don't look like a girl?" I ask a random question, looking desperately at him and he pauses, which is not the answer I was looking for.

"Ling!" I cry, and he stifles a laugh.

"You look great, Envy-chan. Really. Edward's a lucky guy." He says with a warm smile, and my heart lurches. Does he really think so?

"Thanks." I say, and Ling gets a peculiar look in his eyes. He's acting strange, but before I have time to ponder further on that, he suddenly embraces me with our bodies pressed flushed together and kisses me. My eyes open wide in shock, and I'm too surprised to even decide if I want to kiss him back or push him away.

After a moment he pulls away, leaving me with my mouth slightly open in disbelief. Did that really just happen? He seems to read the look on my face and smiles at me.

"I just wanted to see what it would be like. Y'know, to kiss a guy. I've never tried before. It wasn't bad, but I think you're supposed to move your lips." He teases me casually and I think my entire body might have turned into a small furnace right then.

Just when I think I'm getting over Ling.

I regret my choice of tight pants at this moment, and give him a look.

"Yeah—still not gay. That did nothing for me." He just laughs it off and leaves me with a severe discomfort in my nether regions.

I go to bed without eating, and I have to make a bit of an effort to pull off these tight clothes. I'm still not used to wearing things like this, but I suppose I must look good if even a straight man wants to kiss me. That's what I'm going to keep telling myself, anyway.

I groan and flop back on my bed, cursing my body. Pretty sure villagers could camp in my boxers right now.

I do something I haven't done in a very long time and I slip my hand under the thin fabric covering my stubborn erection, and begin to stroke myself.

I turn my head to the side, unable to look as I pleasure myself. I close my eyes and groan softly as I picture Ed's warm, writhing body above mine and I feel my shaft swell even further in my hand. My mind goes a little further with my fantasy and suddenly Ling is walking in, not wearing a damned thing and he kneels beside me and begins to kiss me. My mouth hangs open as I visualize him climbing on top of me in front of Ed and lowering himself onto my ready cock while Ed continues to fuck me at a steady pace.

At this point I'm aroused beyond belief and I climax hard and suddenly as my mind goes blank, erasing the images from my thoughts as I experience the intense pleasure wracking my body.

I fall asleep almost instantly after I'm finished.