You Can't Bring Me Down
So here's a wee action packed chap! R+R much appreciated;)! Sadly Dougie Poynter is not owned by me although in my heart and mind he's 100% mine! We're also married so…
Chapter 10 I'm Better Off Without You
JAZZIE'S POV
"How come I never see your dad around?" asks Josh, taking hold of my hand as we hop of the bus.
The bus drives of into the distance.
I look up at Josh and squirm.
"You don't want to talk about it, do you?" he notes gently.
"It's nothing more than he had enough and left" I shrug, trying to act like it's no biggie.
"That must have been hard" his eyes fill with sympathy, he draws me closer, as we walk along the high street.
"Yeah, but I think it had the biggest effect on Dougie" I shiver as the harsh December air whips through us.
Josh stiffens slightly. I still don't think he's gotten around the concept of me being Dougie's little sister. I'm not sure what happened between him and Dougie but it must have been some boy thing, alpha male crap.
"And how's that?" he asks, coming back to his senses.
"Well Dougie's now the only boy in the family. Dad and Dougie were really close as well, you should have seen him the day we found the note; he wouldn't talk to anyone, just stayed in his room. I guess he felt betrayed. Maybe he wanted to go with dad, I wouldn't blame him" I explain matter-of-factly, trying not to put any emotion into my words. If I tell it like a story then it doesn't have to be real, but if I start putting in my feelings that's when I'll start to break down.
"A note? What note?" Josh frowns, confused.
"Dougie was left alone after his operation-"
"What operation?" Josh interrupts.
I look at him oddly, what's with his sudden interest in Dougie?
"Dougie had to get an operation because he was in a fight with some guy, the guy busted his nose. His whole nose bone was smashed; he had to get cartilage from his ear to replace it. He's always getting into fights like that" I watch Josh's face closely. If I hadn't known him any better I would say it paled.
"No shit" he whispers.
"What?" I ask, what is it with him and Dougie? Honestly, boys can be so… over protective and big headed.
"So who found the note?" he seems lost in his own world, his face scrunched up, like he's thinking hard.
"Me and Dougie. Dougie felt guilty, because he must have fallen asleep when dad had left, he thought it was all his fault"
We walk past a vandalised park, a swing creaking in the wind.
"Why would he think it was his fault?" Josh dodges past a football.
"Well, if he was awake he might have been able to stop dad or something"
"So…" Josh furrows his brow, "You think it's Dougie's fault too?"
I bite my lip, fighting with the war in my head.
Just be truthful a small voice whispers in the back of my head.
"Yes" my voice comes out strong and harsh.
Josh flinches slightly then nods, ending the conversation. He checks his watch in an agitated fashion, like he can't wait to get away now, even though on the bus he was whining he never wanted me to leave.
"Here you are your highness!" He makes a grand gesture to my front door, which we now stand in front of.
"Thanks Josh, I had a really nice time!" I lean forward and he kisses me. I give him a quick hug, and then he starts to walk down the drive.
"Bye!" he calls when he gets to the bottom.
"Bye!" I call back then enter my house.
I shrug of my jacket then kick of my UGG's. I creep along the hall, grinning as I recognise a soft low droan. I follow the sound, which streams out the living room. I peek through the crack of the door, finding Dougie, sitting in the dark with his bass in his lap, notebook balanced on the arm of the chair and a pencil in between his teeth.
"Hey" I greet him softly.
He jumps, nearly dropping his bass.
"Hey" he smiles back, placing the bass gently on the ground.
"Have you eaten yet?" I ask, walking into the centre of the room.
"Yes" he says tightly.
"Dougie?" I force sternly.
"Jazzie, this demo song was supposed to be written and sent to Danny last week, to be perfectly honest food is the last thing on my mind right now! I have bigger things to stress about, like mum going to court, getting this damn song done, or where mum is in general! So if it's such a problem go make some fucking dinner yourself!" he snaps angrily, looking crazy as he grabs at his hair.
I blink at him in shock. Dougie's not one to raise his voice, or snap at someone without reason. Actually he's rarely ever stressed; he's probably the most laid-back person I know. – Or used to know. He grabs his bass angrily, and then slams out the living room, causing a picture to fall from the wall. I hear his footsteps stamp on each stair then him entering his room, cursing furiously to himself.
I sink to the ground shaking.
I thought Dougie was the only one I had left, the only sane one left. He's supposed to look after and protect me. Now who have I got?
I crawl over to the smashed picture frame that fell from the wall in Dougie's rage. I turn the frame over delicately, avoiding in cutting myself. I stare through the broken glass at the picture inside. It was taken three years ago, when we had gone to Spain for our summer holiday. Me and Dougie have our arms around each other, both sun kissed and happily grinning away. We both have our tongues poking out between our lips, a cheeky look in our eyes. I'm wearing a thin beach dress, the ones which you wear over your bikini when at the beach. Dougie's only wearing blue trunks, his tanned chest on show. As a joke we've swapped shoes, Dougie's always had small feet and I for a girl have always had strangely large sized feet, so we've usually been around the same size. Dougie's wearing pink sandals, with daffodils decorated up the side. I'm wearing black scruffy converse, even in the hot climate. Mum and dad are behind us, holding hands. They look so happy, completely oblivious to the mess that was yet to come. I remember the day so clearly, we had asked a random person walking by to take our picture as mum was in love with the scenery. It was quite nice, the startling blue sky and ocean, both so clear you could hardly tell when one ended and the other started.
Sleek, sparkling white yachts rested in the horizon. I don't blame mum for wanting to capture the moment. That was the last time we were all happy together. After that Dougie and dad started to disappear together regularly. Dougie changed, he become hard, coming home often with a black eye or bloody nose. That was the last time Dougie was Dougie.
DOUGIE'S POV
I storm to school.
It's way too early in the morning but maybe if I impress Mrs Hound enough she'll consider dropping the court events. I arrive at the school gates and look around in amusement. The playground is heaving, pupils bustling about everywhere you look. There's a buzz in the air, it's so busy. The only time's when I bother to ever turn up to school it's dead quiet, no one to be seen as there already in their classes.
I notice Josh ahead and try and avert my eyes. I'm not sure exactly what he and my sisters are, close friends and nothing more I hope. I don't even know how the two got to know each other, there's a few years age difference plus Jazzie doesn't hang about with any his friends. I near them, sadly there's no other way to get to the front door without passing them.
"Hey look Josh, it's Dougie!" one of Josh's friends jeers at me, nudging Josh. Josh looks up from his phone, his eyes finding me in a flash.
"Just leave it Don" Josh mutters, "he's not worth it"
I spin around and glare at Josh.
"Aw come on Josh, look you've hurt little Dougie's feelings!" Don mocks.
Don starts towards me but Josh grabs his belt dragging him backwards. Don looks at Josh in surprise, "What the hell dude?"
"I said leave him alone!" Josh hisses advancing on Don.
"Woah, okay…" Don sulks, backing off.
Anger sparks inside of me.
Why is he caring for me like this? He doesn't know anything about me. Why is he acting like my bloody dad all of a sudden? Dad. Oh no she didn't. That little big mouthed idiot! Jazzie's went and spraffed away to her new boyfriend all about dad leaving and Josh now feels all sorry for me!
I turn and charge at Josh, he looks up in surprise before I smash into him, adrenaline thriving me forward. He grunts at my force and we both collapse to the ground. My hands enclose around his neck and he tries to struggle me off which results in us both rolling around the pavement like animals. He throws his fist forward, driving it into my eye. He pins me down, his knees digging into my forearms. I try to shove him off but his weights to great. He punches me repeatedly in the cheek. I kick out, setting him off balance which gives me the upper hand. I flip him over and punch upwards, aiming for his nose but instead catching his chin, his head smashes back which seems to only make him angrier.
All of a sudden it isn't Josh I'm hitting. It's dad; it's everyone that's ever failed or left me that I'm punching and kicking.
"Dougie! What are you doing?" I'm vaguely aware of someone screeching. I feel hands yank at my shoulders, trying to pry me away from Josh but Josh slams me down. I hear a cracking sound and groan. Pain shoots up my right arm. I lunge at Josh, fresh anger forming from me. I kick him full force in the kidney and he crumples, his face screwed in pain.
Somebody pulls me away from him.
I'm taking inside, god knows where to.
They sit me upright against a wall. Someone else comes over, there voice raised and angry. I massage my temples and slowly my vision sharpens.
Mrs Scott's leaning over me, an antiseptic wipe in her hand, whilst she dabs away at my cheek.
"You really need to control your temper Dougie" she sighs. I wince as the solution stings in my cuts, "I've put forward the suggestion you start anger management classes"
My eyes widen at this. She notices, and shrugs.
"Well you seem to be going about with a lot of anger in you. In anger management you'll learn how to deal with it all, how to release it" Mrs Scott sticks medical tape along my cheek bone.
"Battering Josh felt good"
A/N 'battering' means fighting, it's a slang word, and I think it is mostly used in Scotland! Sorry for my own words slipping in!
I reply truthfully.
"I bet it did but you can't just go about punching people whenever you feel angry. Violence isn't always the answer you know!" she takes a step back, assessing her work.
"I know" I mutter, defeated.
"I've phoned your mum to come in to talk about your court dates and possible exclusion but she's at work-"
I frown. Mum's been out of work for months, there's no way she could be at any work. She told me she was taking a break, why would she be at work? She said she was looking for a better job, that she wasn't being treated right, or translated meaning that the hours were too long and she couldn't be arsed.
"-So I've offered to drive you to the hospital instead"
I groan. I don't think I can bear the whiteness and brightness of the hospital just now. Hospitals are my worst and about only phobia I own. Everything about them makes me sick to the stomach, the smell, the fake smiles and the fact that somewhere in the building there is a morgue. I shiver at the thought of rows and rows of unmoving bodies in bags…
"I thought you could bring along someone? Your sister maybe?"
I snap up to see Mrs Scott looking down at me with concern, "Um, I don't really want her to know about this"
"Okay then… what about Paul?" She starts to collect her belongings together, throwing her handbag over her shoulder.
I think of Paul. Fat lot of help he would be! Then someone's name dawns into my head,
"Actually… can Louise come?" I ask shyly feeling embarrassed.
Mrs Scott smiles at me, "Sure, I think I saw her waiting outside…"
Mrs Scott opens the door to a concerned looking Louise, worry etched across her face.
She jumps up and rushes into, what I now know to be the nurse room.
"Okay, perfect" Mrs Scott smiles then picks up her car keys, "Let's get you to the hospital and get your arm checked out!"
I look down at my oddly angled arm and sigh sadly. The pain is hardly there, I guess my bodies become used to injuries.
I try to get up but fail. Louise and Mrs Scott throw each of my arms over their shoulder then help me stumble out to the car.
We drive off, leaving rumours to spread around the school. All I can seem to think about is how I've messed up again. I lean back in the seat, both Louise and a very mothering Mrs Scott keeping a watchful eye on me.
"What hospital are we going to?" I ask dully.
"St Ravens" Louise informs me, squeezing my unharmed hand which she takes delicately.
I freeze.
"Why not Judes Road?" I ask, trying to keep the nervousness out of my voice.
Mrs Scott frowns at me from the rear view mirror. "Dougie, St Ravens is like an hour closer, why would we go all the way out to Judes Road?"
I start to go clammy.
"Dougie are you okay?" Louise asks, noticing my discomfort.
"I'm fine" I swat her concern away.
I don't want to go to St Ravens. They know me in St Ravens, that's the hospital dad used to always take me to, I can't go with Louise and Mrs Scott! I'll surely be recognised.
One rule I made a long time ago was never to let my personal life get out, Mrs Scott already has her qualms about me, if she realises I'm well known at a hospital, she'll put two and two together then…
Social services here we come.
So BOOM there's another chapter for you;) I'm not sure if you like it? I don't know if you think it's a bit much, what with Dougie in another fight, and another trip to the hospital and all so please tell me your thoughts on it! Dougie will soon be leaving school though, so to some of you's that'll be interesting? Or I don't know:L… also if you have any idea's that you think would fit into this story then PM me them, to help with the flow of the story:D! Really hoped you's enjoyed..
PLEASE REVIEW I BEG:D! xxx