"Roger, roger," the commander said with a mechanical salute before assigning a division to escort Tobi to his destination.
Tobi stood, looking through the forest towards his objective. "At last, the time has come to bring Konoha to its knees!"
"Konoha, eh?" the first droid noted. "Well, this can't be too bad."
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
Nute Gunray monitored the progress of his battle troops from the bridge of his command ship, unfortunately not in orbit as he would most certainly prefer it, but rather settled on the ground so as to be less conspicuous. It was just too bad that the planet Count Dukoo had ordered them to subjugate was under protected status, meaning their intrusion would be detected by monitoring satellites if they remained in orbit.
In the control room were a number of other semi-high ranking Neimoidians, their grayish-green skin and noseless faces all similarly covered with high-standing headdresses denoting their stature in the government, if not their overall physical stature. Next to them, however, was someone who made their appearance seem normal. A half black, half white plant man. This was their bounty-hunter partner whose task it was to capture slaves from the planet, at least that's what they had been told.
"Sir, all cannon emplacements are in position," the squeaky voice of the main battalion commander reported over the vid-screen.
Indeed, Gunray was able to see their target through the long-range viewfinders wired into the viewscreen. The site before him was not awe inspiring. In fact, it looked pathetically primitive, as to be expected on a preserve planet.
The settlement was large, nestled securely within a small range of encircling mountains with a series of natural waterfalls cascading down behind. Hundreds of stone structures rose up from the ground, though few rose up anywhere near to half the height of the mountains behind them, the primitive architecture clearly limiting how high they could build their cities. Each building was clearly made of the same granite that made up the mountains, all with the same basic shape of a cylinder capped with a pointed cone at the top.
There were no defensive energy fields. In fact, they could detect only the barest hints of any electrical equipment at all.
"Mr. Zetsu, are you sure that this is the target area?" Gunray asked the bounty hunter. "There appears to be no value in destroying this pathetic hovel."
"Oh, yes, this is the Village Hidden in the Stone. You should wipe it out before their patrols have time to report our presence to their leader."
Gunray frowned at the sinister sound of the black half of the creature, whatever it was, which contrasted with the almost silly and lighthearted voice of the white half. Insane associates were not at all to the Trade Federation Viceroy's likings, but he would have to put up with it for now.
"You may fire at will, commander," the viceroy ordered through the screen.
"All right, you heard the man!" the high pitched droid ordered. "All batteries, open fire!"
From up above a ridge two miles from Iwagakure, the line of Armored Assault Tanks opened fire with their main cannons, firing heavy bunker busting ordinance into the targeted area. Buildings collapsed on themselves, turning quickly to rubble.
"You should probably make sure you hit the Tsuchikage's residence. Target the tallest building with the large symbol for earth on the top of it," Zetsu ordered.
Firing continued for over five minutes. When the order finally came to cease, most of the tanks having expended nearly all of their heavy ordinance, the commander waited for the sizable dust cloud to dissipate.
Nute Gunray looked through the view screen to witness the inevitable outcome. There wasn't a single structure standing. Where once a proud, if primitive village had stood, now there was a barren rock of nothing.
The Viceroy of the Trade Federation pumped his fist in celebration. An easy victory! His favorite kind.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
The desert wind was blowing, kicking up a dust storm that obscured vision, making seeing anything within the massive dustbowl known locally as the Land of Wind nearly impossible.
"I can't see anything in this dust storm," one of the many mechanical foot soldiers complained to another one in the company. "Are we there yet?"
"Fools! Stop your complaining," a harsh, metallic voice scolded them from behind. "This sand storm offers us a perfect cover for a surprise attack! The pathetic village won't know what hit them and we'll crush them under our boots!" Following this sinisterly delivered line, the voice broke down into a hacking cough.
"Yes, of course, General Grievous, sir!" the tiny droids responded.
And then the dust storm died down for a moment, allowing the walls of the city before it to come into view. "There!" Grievous crowed, clearly not overconfident in the slightest. "Our victory lies before us. Suna will be a mere graveyard before dawn!"
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
The great Swordsman of the Mist, Kisame Hoshigaki-sama, strode nobly and boldly forward towards his homeland once more, the great strapping sword Sameheda "Shark Skin" slung over his shoulder with an ease that would startle lesser swordsmen. Next to the Beowulf-esque Kirigakure ninja, the numerous battle droids appeared truly puny. The blue-skinned sword-prodigy moved through the swampy ground with predatory grace, ever closer to his goal of revenge—or whatever it was that motivated him.
Behind the mighty Kiri missing-nin, an army of battle droids advanced, riding upon Trade Federation battle tanks. With the magnificent Kisame-sama's knowledge of the Village Hidden in the Mist and the technological advantage of the Trade Federation, what chance could their possibly be for the Mist ninja?
A glare. The deadly shark-like eyes of Kisame-sama glared at the narrator. "Stop trying to jinx us. This had better not be a trap."
The narrator trembled fearfully. A trap? What could possibly stand up to the might of Kisame Hoshigaki of the Akatsuki, especially with such an army at his back?
With a last barbed look, the great swordsman strode forward, his sharp, pointed teeth forming a confident smile on his face. He fully expected a trap, and was thinking of the terrible, terrible things he would do to the narrator once the mission was over for the narrator's role in setting things up.
Little did Kisame know, the narrator was secretly smiling, too.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
The tall, silver-haired frame of Count Dooku knelt beside the small Punworcca 116-class interstellar sloop he favored for stealth missions. With the massive golden solar sail stowed within, the craft was quite compact and nearly undetectable. While the Sith Lord preferred the safety of a powerful capital ship when there was a chance of encountering strong enemies, there were times when his master's missions required stealth and a personal touch.
The destruction of the Elemental Nations and the abduction of a selection of ninja was one such time.
A holographic projection of a black cloaked figure appeared, hovering above the ground.
"My master," Dooku said, still kneeling.
"What?" the voice replied, "Who is this?"
"It's your apprentice…Darth Tyranus?" the Sith Lord explained hesitantly.
There was a pause. "Oh, yes, right, right. Tyranus."
"I am reporting that our forces are in position. Iwa has already been wiped out. General Grievous has engaged Suna. Our forces are converging on Kiri with the mercenary Kisame leading them. The leader of the Akatsuki is spearheading the attack on Konoha, and I will be ordering the bombardment of Kumo in moments. Our victory will be—"
"What the hell kind of places are you talking about, Tyranus?" the voice broke in with annoyance, "Kiri? Kumo? Konoha? I've never heard of any of these names you are mentioning except for you and General Grievous! And to be quite honest I'm a little hazy on you. How is conquering these insignificant villages supposed to help the Sith take over the galaxy?"
"Master, you commanded me to find and destroy Uzumaki. This is his home planet…" Dukoo groveled.
There was a brief pause. "Ah, yes, I do recall that. Sort of slipped my mind. Now, prepare yourself. You will be facing a giant octopus."
"You have foreseen it?" Dukoo asked, obediently.
"No, not foreseen. Just seen," the hologram said, "It's right behind you." The hologram faded out.
"What do you—"
"Yo! Yo! Yo! It's the greatest ninja you know, me and Eight-O!"
Dukoo turned to see a monstrous creature just behind him, standing several times higher than his sloop. It had the head of an ox and the body of a massive octopus.
'What kind of octopus has an ox head?' the Sith Lord thought to himself, as he looked at the impossibly large creature that had somehow snuck up behind him despite its gargantuan size.
"It's me, Killa-Bee, I'm the one you see. The rappin' jinchiriki—wheeee!"
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
Supreme Chancellor Palpatine shut off the holographic projection. Everything was in place. The Jedi were occupied with battles across the galaxy. The Galactic Senate was so mired in corruption and bureaucracy that it was incapable of acting in concert. And now, his apprentice was ready. No, not that Tyrannus idiot. The other one. Yes, there was the Rule of Two, but rules were only made to be broken.
It was time to act.
At his desk, the chancellor input the control codes needed to send his personal signal, overriding the Jedi's communications. A second later, a white helmeted head appeared on the screen.
"Clone commander," the Dark Lord of the Sith said.
"Chancellor Palpatine!"
"Execute Order 66," he commanded before flipping the switch that would shut off his transmission.
"Yes, Sir!"
The hologram faded away. Darth Sidious grinned wickedly. It would be the beginning of the end for—
The hologram faded back in. "Eh," the figure of the clone commander rubbed the back of its helmet. "Which one was Order 66 again?"
Palpatine sighed. "Order 66. Eliminate all of the Jedi. Wipe them out."
The clone laughed nervously. "Oh, right, yeah. That one. Got it." The hologram faded out again.
At last he would—the hologram faded back in.
"HEY! I'M a Jedi!" the clone commander yelled, pulling his helmet off to reveal spiky blond hair and deep blue eyes. "What do you mean by eliminate them!"
Palpatine decided it would be best if he thought fast. "Eliminate? No, no, no I said 'well ain't they great', all of the Jedi."
Holographic bright blue eyes looked accusingly through the communications signal, "What about that 'wipe them out' part?"
"Oh, that," Darth Sidious chuckled nervously, "I said 'type them out'—give them an official commendation. Yes, they are to be commended for all their hard work. Well, ain't they great! Type them out, give all of them commendations…"
There was a moment of total silence. The blond haired clone glared through the hologram, apparently not buying it.
"Erm—come to think of it, it wasn't supposed to be Order 66. Should have been Order 67, yes that order concerning mandatory holidays for all clone troopers. You know what, nevermind. I'll just take care of the paperwork myself. Sorry, gotta go!" With that, Palpatine quickly shut down the hologram.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
On a planet far away, the clone commander frowned before disappearing in a puff of smoke.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
The sound of blaster fire tore through the once tranquil woods of Fire Country, trees exploding from the power of the weapons being discharged.
A ninja wearing a grayish-green chuunin vest suddenly dove to his right, as the tree he had been crouching in exploded. The ninja, wearing the swirling leaf symbol on his forehead, tracked the attack back to its source, his eyes never leaving the direction the blaster fire had come from. As soon as his feet found purchase on another tree, the shinobi twisted his body, and with strength and accuracy far beyond anything a normal human could ever hope to achieve, threw a kunai back towards the droid that had shot at him.
The sound of a metallic clang rang out, and the droid was knocked to the ground. "Ow! That hurt!" the downed droid called out. Then it got back up.
The Leaf-nin stared in unbelief. "What are these things?" he asked, turning to his equally overwhelmed teammates. Scores of laser blasts pounded the area around him, and the ninja barely managed to back flip away to avoid certain death. "I've never seen any ninjutsu like what they use! We have to retreat!"
Before the rattled chuunin could make good on his intended course of action, a number of particularly familiar Konoha ninja landed beside him.
A girl with twin buns in her hair launched a dozen kunai at once. A dozen droid foot soldiers dropped to the ground or froze in place, electricity sparking from their punctured ocular sockets. "They're made of metal. Aim for the eyes and neck joints."
A very annoyed looking Shikamaru touched down beside Ten-Ten, then the rest of Team Gai and the group once known as the Rookie Nine joined the scene, dropping down from the treetops. There was a clear tick mark on Shikamaru's face. These guys were attacking at dawn. What kind of sadistic enemy did that? "They're all long range fighters, so if you get in close you'll be able to deal a lot more damage. They're weak against suiton and raiton techniques, but completely immune to any kind of genjutsu or mind control techniques. They've got lousy aim, so keep moving and don't use any techniques that make you an easier target to hit. Okay, got it? Good. Now let's deal with them quickly so that I can get back to sleep!"
Chouji went to work, using only partial body expansion techniques to avoid becoming too large of a target. Sakura, Kiba, Akamaru, and Rock Lee all waded into the enemy lines, decimating the enemy with punishing physical attacks which rent the droids into scrap metal. Shikamaru's shadow stretched out to engulf an entire platoon of battle droids, and then Shikamaru just turned his body and pointed his finger at another platoon. When Shikamaru squeezed his fingers, so did the droids, only they were carrying blasters.
So what of Neji whose gentle fist would be of little use against mechanical opponents? Or Ino whose mind-body transfer would be useless against them? Or Shino, whose bugs would not do much against metal skin?
That's what blasters are for.
Wait a minute, a careful reader might say, didn't Konoha get twelve blasters from the deal with Qui-gon Jinn all the way back in chapter one? What about the rest of those weapons?
Glad you asked.
Ten-Ten leapt high into the air, twin scrolls twirling around her and then opening up as she released her ultimate attack: "Twin Rising LASER Dragons!"
"Back up!" one droid called out frantically. "Send in the reser—" and then its head was knocked clean off of its shoulders by a—
DYNAMIC ENTRY!
A green spandex wearing man, clearly burning with an overabundance of YOUTH smashed through a score of robots before coming to a stop to give a thumbs up back to his rival. "That's a hundred and four for me, Kakashi!"
The aforementioned one-eyed ninja was using a robot he had grabbed up and enhanced with lightning-chakra as a club to one-handedly turn every other droid in the vicinity into worthless scrap metal, all while very conspicuously reading a familiar orange colored book. "Did you say something?" he asked in a completely unconcerned voice.
Might Guy pumped his fist into the air, "Oh, that hip attitude of your burns me up! But don't think you can fool me Kakashi! I will win this challenge. Not only will I also fight these enemies with one hand, I will read TWO books from cover to cover before this battle is finished! And if I cannot do that, I will..."
Kakashi tuned him out. He was getting to the good part of Icha Icha Galaxy. Jiraiya was an excellent ghost writer.
Standing on the upper walls of Konoha, an orange-masked figure watched the battle unfolding with amusement. The Konoha forces were hopelessly outnumbered, he had brought ten times the number of droids than he had sent to the other villages. The Leaf ninja would soon enough run out of chakra and stamina, but the true leader of the Akatsuki had to give the beleaguered shinobi in the forest credit for putting up a magnificent fight. It would only make his revenge sweeter.
Too bad for them it was all a distraction to draw the forces of Konoha outside so that he would be free to destroy it from within. Tobi chuckled darkly.
Another chuckle from behind him answered his own. Tobi's lone sharingan eye narrowed inside the mask and he turned to see who was there.
"Nice mask," came a voice that sounded almost as idiotically cheerful as his own.
"Thank you, ninja-san!" Tobi replied with fake exuberance. "What do you like about Tobi's mask?"
"I like the color," came the earnest reply.
"I see. Well, Tobi would love to stay and talk to you, but," the voice abruptly dropped to a deep, sinister tone, "but I have a village I need to destroy."
"Yeah...about that...that's not gonna happen."
Tobi chuckled. "Oh, and who is going to stop me?"
In answer, an orange beam of energy ignited as Naruto Uzumaki took a step forward, blue eyes locked with the single sharingan one of his opponent.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
The first warning Nute Gunray had that something was terribly amiss was the spike of stone that pierced his heart. It was protruding up through the metal floor of his ship, right into his cowardly little chest.
Zetsu had slightly more warning before he was summarily released from existence.
"Jinton:Atomic Dismantling Technique!" was the sound that came from the short stocky man floating in the air above him.
"Wait! You're doing it wrong!" Zetsu cried out as a cube of energy expanded around him. "You're mixing up the Japanese and English technique name!"
The Tsuchikage didn't really care, completing the Particle Release attack by turning the freaky plant man into itty bitty bits of atomic dust.
"H-how?" one of the Neimoidians cried out as a Hidden Stone ninja rose up through the metal in front of him. "Your village was wiped out! We saw it!"
A quick stab of a kunai, and the Trade Federation representative was dispatched. "Yeah, and it's going to be annoying having to reshape all that rubble back into building shapes again. We'll all be doing D-ranks involving earth shaping techniques for months thanks to you scum."
Onoki, Third Tsuchikage, floated back down to the floor. "Hmph. I guess we actually owe that Konoha brat now. Thanks to his warning, we were able to get our civilians to safety and sink our ninja forces underground before the attack came."
One of the Rock ninja shrugged his shoulders. "He did say all we needed to repay him was some ramen."
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
Kisame stood with his mouth agape, as he stared unbelievingly at the sight before him. All around him the droids he had been sent with were lying in pools of molten metal, bubbles of lava lapping up around them. Mei Terumi's handiwork was not the surprise, however.
It wasn't even the sight of Sameheda having been severed in half, or the bright green beam of a lightsaber protruding from his stomach. It was the appearance of the opponent that had so easily bested him which shocked him the most.
The Mizukage gave him a sweet smile. "Kisame Hoshigaki, meet Jedi Master Yoda."
"Judged me by my size, did you?" the small, green but exceptionally powerful Jedi master asked. "A mistake, that was."
Kisame, with his last strength, made an attempt to choke the life out of the narrator, but it was already far too late for that.
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
Orange robes and blond hair spun and twirled in the air as Naruto somersaulted around the top of Konoha's walls, his lightsaber slashing and stabbing through the black and red cloud cloak of his opponent. His mastery of Ataru, also known as Form IV, had reached the point where he was a whirling dervish of unpredictable motion. Combined with replacement techniques and shadow clones, he was nearly impossible to hit, as Tobi was fast coming to understand.
The orange beam of energy slid straight through the Akatsuki leader, who in turn wrapped his chains around Naruto's over-extended arms, only to rend nothing but a wooden log. Tobi's sharingan spun, its predictive abilities being taxed to their maximum to stay ahead of his attacker, allowing him to dematerialize the parts of his body just ahead of the deadly blade. Not even Minato had been this frustrating. It was as if the ninja he faced had a sharingan as well!
Tobi used a series of explosive tags to disengage from his attacker. Time for some psychological warfare. "It seems your training away from Konoha has borne fruitful results, Naruto-kun. But it won't matter in the end. Your attacks on me are futile and Konoha is doomed." A series of explosions from the nearby forest. "Even now your friends are dying as the Trade Federation army overwhelms them. There is nothing you can do to stop them, and nothing you can do to hurt me."
Naruto, his attention momentarily drawn to the forest, turned his back towards the orange-masked man, his head slumped dejectedly. The blade of his lightsaber slowly extinguished. When Naruto raised his head back up, his eyes were slit red.
"Oh, I have ways to hurt you. Believe it." Naruto raised his hand. "Force-choke no jutsu!"
To his utter astonishment, Tobi found his throat being constricted by an invisible power, his form being lifted up into the air against his will. A horrible, overbearing power was crushing him. He tried to turn intangible to escape, but he remained in the grip of the Force that was choking the life out of him. "H-How?"
Malevolent eyes filled with the power of the Nine Tailed Fox stared back at him. "The Force surrounds us, binds, us, penetrates us. It's everywhere. Believe it."
Tobi believed it.
"Naruto!" a stern, familiar voice called out. "Put him down! This is not the way."
"But, Master Obi-wan, he's trying to kill my friends and my whole village!" Naruto complained. "I've got to stop him!"
Obi-wan Kenobi took a step forward, his hand reaching out imploringly. "Yes, Naruto, we will stop him. But not this way. Now, put him down."
"But..."
"Naruto, what have I told you about Force chocking people?"
"That it's the Dark Side." Somewhat abashedly Naruto kicked the wall below him even while still holding Tobi up in the air.
"And what is your Jedi Code?"
"That I'll make bonds with my precious people and protect them with my life..."
"And..." Obi-wan prompted.
"And...I won't give into the Dark Side, I'll make the Dark Side give into me."
"So, show me."
"Alright, alright." Naruto let Tobi fall, the masked man clutching his throat as he gasped for air. "There, are you satisfied? Jeez, Kakashi never complains when I kill the bad guy."
Another brown-robed figure joined Obi-wan on the wall. Mace Windu removed the hood from his cloak and gave a bright smile. "I'm impressed, Naruto Uzumaki. It takes a lot of strength to turn away from the Dark Side like that. Today, you've earned my trust."
"And proven the worth of your Jedi-do," Qui-gon Jinn chimed in. "I think there can be no question. The Council will grant you the rank of Master."
"I agree," Master Windu said. "Once this is all over we'll take a vote. Now, how shall we do with the masked man?"
Naruto wiped a few tears from his eyes. One of his goals, to be a master Jedi, finally realized. "Talk no jutsu? Er, Jedi Mind-Trick?" he suggested.
"It's dangerous to try and force strong mind, but I guess it beats the alternative. Alright, let's give it a try," Obi-wan said. Then he turned to Tobi and waved his hand horizontally in front of him. "You will stop attacking Konoha and turn to the light."
Qui-gon stepped forward and waved his hand as well. "You will stop attacking Konoha and turn to the light."
Next, Anakin was up. "What he said."
Tobi clutched his head.
Mace Windu added his considerable influence. "You will stop attacking Konoha and turn to the light."
Then it was Naruto's turn.
He started with his life story. Twenty minutes and three flashback episodes later, Nartuo waved his hand.
Tobi gave a terrific groan, before suddenly he began to swirl out of existence. Just before he completely disappeared, he whispered, "Tobi's a good boy."
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
Naruto stood alongside several members of the Jedi Council outside the walls of Konoha. The attacking Trade Federation droids were completely wiped out, and the village was left unharmed. Team Gai, Team Eight, and Team Ten along with Sakura all stood nearby for the sake of convenience as Naruto met up with Tsunade.
"Naruto Uzumaki," the voice of the Fifth Hokage commanded, "report on your mission to the Hidden Village of the Sky Ship People."
Naruto gestured to the assembled Jedi one by one. "Oh, sure. This here is Jedi Master Old Toad Geezer," he said, to a loud harrumph from Yoda, "You already know Jedi Master Girly-Hair Sensei and Jedi Master Ramen-Hater Sensei." Obi-wan and Qui-gon waved. There really was no point protesting. "These are Jedi Master Samuel L. Jackson, Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker, and Senator Padme Amidala, vice president of the official Galactic Naruto Harem."
"Galactic Naruto Harem?"
"Absolutely. Membership in the Galactic Naruto Harem includes a number of perks and privileges," Padme explained, passing out pamphlets to some of the kunoichi on hand. Not only are you automatically upgraded to 'precious person' status, you also get exclusive snuggling and whisker stroking privileges that non-harem members simply cannot get."
"Not to mention that kunoichi from the Elemental Nations are eligible for Jedi training as Naruto's apprentices," Hinata added,levitating promotional literature into the air and igniting a lavender colored lightsaber.
Ten-Ten joined immediately.
"Yeah, that started up back a few chapters ago. Oh, and Granny-Tsunade, would you mind not having Hinata listed as a missing nin? You can say she was sent to help me on my mission? She's the harem president and a charter member."
Tsunade started rubbing her head. "Only, you, Naruto."
A group of porcelain masked ANBU suddenly dropped down to kneel before their leader. "Hokage-sama, the Raikage has sent emissaries: Yugito Nii and Kirabi."
"Yo yo yo, Hokage-sama! Big Bro A wants you to know—grrk"
"Hokage-sama, Lord Raikage has ordered us to convey his thanks for the critical intelligence you passed on to us, and his esteem for your ninja, Naruto Uzumaki's skill and power on the battlefield," the blond haired jinchuriki of the Two-Tailed Cat cut in while putting B in a headlock and covering his mouth. It was part of her mission. "His clones were of immeasurable value and saved many Cloud ninja from the invaders. I have been authorized to establish a non-aggression and trade treaty with the Village Hidden in the Leaves, if you are amenable."
Tsunade raised her eyebrows. "I think that's good enough grounds to convince the Konoha council to approve of Naruto's promotion to chuunin. Congratu—"
"Hokage-sama," another trio of ANBU cut in. "Ao of Kirigakure requests an audience to discuss formalizing an alliance between the Mist and the Leaf."
"Make that jounin," Tsunade amended.
Ao walked in, but instead of heading directly to see the Hokage, he stopped by Padme. "I hear you're the one to see about joining the harem? The Mizukage would like some of your promotional material and would like to inquire if heads of state are eligible."
"Well," Tsuanade continued, "that just leaves Iwa to deal w—"
"Hokage-sama! Messenger hawk from Iwagakure!" A ninja from the Cryptography department burst in, holding up a document. "They want to establish economic relations with the Land of Fire and begin peace negotiations. Oh, and Naruto Uzumaki has been granted free ramen for life at every ramen stand and restaurant in the Land of Stone."
"YOSH!" Naruto pumped his fists, fire literally burning in his eyes.
Seeing this, the Hokage took emergency measures to prevent any possible defection of their top ninja. "As Hokage, I declare that Naruto eats for free in all Konoha restaurants, and we will reimburse him any ramen related expenses within the Land of Fire!"
Naruto did a happy dance. This was better than being promoted to Jedi Master and jounin.
"I wonder how Suna is doing," Hinata mentioned as she handed a pamphlet to Yugito Nii. "We haven't heard from them since the attacks begun."
Naruto waved the worry away. "I'm sure they're fine. There's no way Gaara lost to those droid bozos out in the desert."
It was at that moment that General Grievous appeared right in the middle of the camp, his arms extending to ignite four lightsabers simultaneously. Behind him, a dozen droids sprang up aiming blasters at everyone.
There was a tense moment of inaction while everyone prepared for battle.
"Can you believe what I found lying around outside?"
The voice was definitely not General Grievous.
"Kankuro, stop showing off your new toy," Gaara's gravelly voice commanded from behind him, the remaining Suna siblings appearing in a swirl of his sand.
"An entire army of fully functional puppets!" Kankuro popped out from behind General Grievous, his fingers manipulating chakra strings connected to the battle droids. "The Suna Puppet corps is going to be stronger than ever. Just got to dust all the sand out from where Gaara buried them all."
With that, all the tension melted away. Everything was looking good.
"You know, Master Yoda, with all of us here on this planet, who is protecting the government back on Coruscant?" Mace Windu asked.
"In the Galactic Senate, our trust we must place," Yoda responded.
"Oh, yeah," Naruto added. "Um, Padme, wasn't there some big vote thingy you were supposed to be taking part in today?"
Padme shrugged. "It'll be alright. Protecting your home was more important. Besides, I left it up to my proxy, Jar-Jar Binks."
The entire Jedi Council immediately felt a tremor in the Force. "I'm getting a bad feeling about this," Anakin muttered.
"What?" Padme said. "It's just for a few days. How bad can it be?"
Naruto: Attack of the Clones!
"Your forces have failed to destroy Konoha," an emotionless voice reported to the Supreme Chancellor, the pair sitting in the center of the Galactic Senate chambers. The figure was dressed from head to foot in black, a bulky mask obscuring his face.
"That is of no consequence. All has proceeded according to my plan, my young apprentice," the similarly black robed Sith Lord replied. "With the elders of the Jedi Council away from the seat of power, I have been able to secure the galaxy for the Sith. We will deal with the Jedi as soon as my position is secure."
In the Galactic Senate, the Naboo representative pod rose to the floor to be acknowledged by the Chancellor. Jar-Jar Binks stood before the Senate raising his voice, "Me is proposing, the Supreme Chancellor be made Emperor of the Galaxy and that the national anthem of the Galactic Empire be the Imperial March by John Williams."
There was a bit of a furor around the room. The whole making the Chancellor into the Emperor didn't seem like such a good idea, but on the other hand, the Imperial March theme was pretty epic.
"All in favor?" Palapatine demanded. A number of hands went up. "If any oppose, kill them," Palpatine very audibly instructed his new apprentice.
"Hn."