Told you I'd be faster :P
Maybe I should change this to Romance/Drama... amirghtamiright? ;) Cheers for the reviews I do like to know you're enjoying it and what you think of it.
If it helps, I know exactly where the story is going and everything will be explained all in due course, please enjoy the ride.
Things have been horrible since the party. Freddie is a complete mess over what Effy did to him and Naomi is so angry at her hurting him this much (when she specifically asked her not to!) that it has taken a lot of will power she didn't know she possessed to not go over the road and violently rip the superior smirk off her annoying face. And she would have, if not for Freddie pleading with her to leave it alone, saying she will only make it worse. According to him Cook is a well known hard-man in these parts and had returned that night from a stretch in prison for GBH. Any advertisement about their affair (like Naomi beating the door down and screaming at Effy; "how could you fuck up my best friend?") would likely get Freddie into serious trouble. So Naomi conceded to let Freddie deal with it in the way he seemed fit. Which at the moment was to drink heavily, smoke weed heavily and hardly leave his room.
A small upside that coincides with these recent events is that Starbooks is suddenly becoming more popular. Naomi would usually get on Freddie's back about pulling his weight for the shop but Naomi is finding she is managing quite well on her own and being busy helps take her mind off Freddie's fucked up situation and also some of her own recent developments and confessions. Besides, having a liquored up stoner banging around the shop floor can misconstrue impressions to her many new regular customers. As well as having him spontaneously burst into tears a few times a day. He is better off left to his own devices upstairs for now.
However when the end of the day comes around and the shop is cleaned down and the money counted, Naomi can't escape her own petrifying thoughts that she tries to avoid by rushing herself off her feet in the shop or concentrating on fixing Freddie. She sleeps restlessly because her mind is reeling, constantly barraging her with thoughts of her neighbor. She has been trying to figure out this delicate dance they find themselves in and Naomi has turned to her writing countless times this week.
It is to be expected from a woman who owns her own shop filled with time's most beautiful works of literature, who's authors felt and lived as much she does; she is a closet writer of poetry and prose and stories and truths. The pages of her notebook are rapidly being filled with words pumped from her own aching organ as each slumberless night drifts into the early hours of the clearer day. She writes more and more about Emily and how much she wants her.
Emily has been…off with her since the party. She's always busy and blatantly avoiding her. Sometimes she puts it down to Emily being genuinely busy and maybe a little awkward about what happened. She might feel bad for not warning either of them about Cook and therefore too ashamed to show her face for a while. Dark as the night her thoughts can flip and turn on her and she worries herself that Effy has told her everything she knows. That Naomi is a gold-star muff-muncher and used to be a horrendous player to boot. Naomi can't sleep for worrying that Emily is plain and simply freaked by her now and just doesn't like her. Naomi is not the kind of person she thought she was and that's that. Naomi lied and she can't be forgiven.
Except that she didn't lie. She just never told the truth. But that was in the past and a more important truth is that Naomi is completely changed since owning Starbooks. She is now a person that she herself can be proud of and she'll be damned if anyone disagrees that she has never been anyone other than that when with Emily. Emily makes her into a better person.
It's not like Emily is the picture of honesty and openness either, she thinks trying to console herself. Naomi's mind is also congested by the traffic of information and revelations she discovered about the petite-redhead last week. She is alarmed by the amount of things she obviously keeps locked away, she is bothered that Emily doesn't want to tell her. Naomi writes about how she pines for the redhead to open up, she just wants to be closer to her. In an infinite number of ways.
She hasn't written about what she thinks is the worst situation; that Naomi senses that Emily is perhaps afraid of her. Naomi is convinced she can see an internal struggle in Emily's expressive brown orbs. She can see lightness and a person full of love, but they are all too quick to freeze into a hard coldness, deflecting any warmth that may dare to try and reach her. Naomi is afraid that the ice may be too old and thick to break through and that by Naomi trying to expose the Emily she's seen a few times, which will then allow the real Emily to be hers completely at last, is probably a lot more difficult and maybe impossible for her to do alone.
She's afraid that she will never get to know the girl, and worse still that Naomi will never be a significant part of Emily's life. She feels that the fight Emily is already battling within herself is far greater than Naomi will ever comprehend and that all she can do is wait whilst being the person she wants Emily to love. Just incase she ever can. But she doesn't know that answer yet. Ultimately, the ice must be thawed from within. But it's not going to stop the blonde from chipping away at it as best she can, exposing shard by shard what she trusts is the real Emily. Her Emily.
Naomi is in love with Emily, that much she has known since she first saw her. She falls deeper and deeper with every moment she spends with her and with every other detail she finds out about her. But it's awful, it's bad and it hurts. Because the more Naomi finds out about Emily the more Naomi can feel her resisting and pulling away, like Emily doesn't want her to know her. It kills her because really, she just wants to know a single answer, one that would enable her to move on and get over her if she can; one that can establish a final line or barrier between friendship and ultimately being the person that completes them in every way. But for now she can only carry on hoping, putting her stupid heart on the line trying to get to know her better, to know THE answer, but making it beat more strongly for Emily all the time until then. What the hell am I doing? Naomi asks, it seems like she's setting herself up for one hell of a fall. The truth is she really can't help it when it comes to Emily. She loves her, she can't control that. She won't stop until she knows one hundred percent that they could never be together. But she can't think about that, it scares her too much. She tells herself she's happy with the way things are now, why can't she just stay like that and not risk the devastation? You can really love someone as a friend right? It would be enough? Except she knows it's not. She wants much more than that…
So with Freddie's massive depression and Emily professionally avoiding her Naomi has been filling the last couple of weeks since the party with work and getting to know her new customers. And buying Freddie booze from Panda who is always so apologetic when she sees Naomi. Apparently her brain isn't always on Planet Thomas and had the good grace to be sympathetic towards Freddie after she deducted (albeit quietly and with no word to Cook) what went on at her party.
When she doesn't sleep because of the red-head she writes or reads her favourite book over and over again, guzzling the words on the well worn and crinkly pages when it isn't on it's permanent home by her bedside. She finds comfort in the memorized themes and plots of the book, not only because they are so familiar but perhaps because, she wonders, they strangely mirror the drama in her own life.
Her only consolation in these troubling times with Emily is that the red-head still manages to find the time to drive the blonde to the hospital to get her bandages changed or a refill of her pain prescription. It makes Naomi think she still cares and that things are just going to be a bit awkward for a while. Naomi wishes the hospital could prescribe her a daily dose of Emily, as she is convinced there is no drug or medical marvel out there that will make her feel as well or as mended or even painless than an extended period of time spent with one Emily Fitch.
Alas, Emily drives her there, she gets her drugs and she drops her back off with a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes and Naomi feels like she did when Emily left suddenly without saying goodbye that night. It makes her feel cold. So she sighs and lets her leave and lets her comeback in her own time. It's always going to be in Emily's own time. She wishes she could speed up the process.
There may be a distinct lack of communication. She decides the next time she gets her alone, she will get them to have a proper conversation, and get things back to how she wants them.
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Naomi is cleaning down for the day as Freddie emerges from his pit to tell her something that just might make her wish come true a lot earlier than she'd hoped,
"Hey buddy, you ok?" she asks quietly and carefully, thinking anything louder and more jovial would be extremely insensitive.
He nods once but doesn't smile, not since the party, "Just came to tell you; a bunch of us are going out tonight. Thomas DJs once a week at The Glass, thought we'd check it out."
She is a little taken aback by this suddenly sociable Freddie and she really can't be arsed with clubbing tonight after her busy week, but she goes along with whatever he needs.
"Yeah, cool. Sounds good." She looks at him questioningly, "So Panda and…?"
"Panda, Emily, Effy and Cook are coming with us." He says hollowly.
Now that isn't on. "What the fuck Freddie? You wanna go fucking dancing with them? Like she hasn't just ripped your heart out and shat on it?"
Her hands in mid air in a gesture that means she doesn't know what to do with him, "she's not fucking coming in here, I'll…I'll…" She doesn't know what she would actually do to Effy. So many fantasies have been played out in her mind about the most effective way of causing her extreme discomfort its hard for her to decide. She's thought of a few, all are equally as satisfying to the blonde.
"Leave it alone Naomi!" Freddie almost shouts, but then looks guilty towards the only person that has shown they truly care about him. So he carries on more softly, "We've got to keep up appearances yeah?"
Naomi has calmed down but sighs frustrated, "What the fuck has happened to us Fred's? It wasn't supposed to be this complicated."
Knowing full well that his blonde friend is referring to the unnerving possible threat of James Cook breaking down their door and breaking Freddie's knee-caps, all because Freddie had fallen in love with a beautiful girl next door.
He knows she's suffering too, having Emily avoiding her when they had just come so close has got to hurt. He knows hurt when he sees it, especially on Naomi. Moving to this place and starting their own business was supposed to right so many of their wrongs and give them a peaceful fresh start. Naomi is right, their life here is more complicated than they imagined it being.
His voice is flat and he shrugs apathetically, "I don't know Nai." He turns around and trudges back up the stairs to his room saying, "They'll be here at ten."
What little of the conversations she's had with him have all been like this the past two weeks; abrupt, to the point and devoid of emotion. Dragging her into his mess and making her think her problems are less significant is what hurts him too. But he couldn't stop it and he needs her right now, she's all he has.
Naomi watches him go up the stairs before throwing her cleaning cloth in anger down on the coffee bar.
"This is bullshit." She mutters to no one in particular.
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Panda is the first to arrive and Naomi greets her with a sloppy kiss on each cheek as Panda giggles her excited hellos and waves a bottle of Pinot Grigio in her face. Naomi decided earlier on that she would be well on her way to steaming before her guests arrived, not wanting to able to see Effy's smirk or Emily's sad eyes unless they were blurry. She also knows she is a happier drunk and she would need all the ammunition possible to not slap Effy in the face and wrestle her to the ground when she saw her.
Ushering Panda through the shop door she drunkenly swaggers to Freddie and Naomi's living area up the stairs, thinking it would be best to pre-drink in their lounge where it is comfier and where she can trust a known criminal not to steal from their register.
Panda giddily comments on how "whizzer" their house is as she bounces from room to room, not waiting for Naomi to offer her a tour she was about to suggest. She unceremoniously plants herself next to a monged-since-seven-O'clock-Freddie and exclaims that he has a "Whacker lot of weed!" From his lazy position on the couch he immediately offers her two's on the humongous spliff he is medicating himself on. She looks positively bursting with fun that Naomi can't help but laugh at the scene and thank her lucky stars that this bundle of energy would be joining them tonight.
Naomi is helping herself to the wine Panda brought and thus her fifth glass of wine that night when she hears the shop bell ring and the distinct, goose bump inducing tones of Emily's voice,
"Naoms? You in?"
Naomi silently curses as she feels caught unprepared and quickly puts the bottle down but carries her glass with her to face the start of this ridiculous charade.
She stumbles a bit on the last stair, having taken her support bandage off her ankle for the night and not being used to wearing such high heels. But she wanted to look good for Emily tonight and thinks she has succeeded when she catches the red-head looking her up and down and sees the red-head smile genuinely in what feels like ages.
The blonde straightens her black high waisted skirt and flutters her hands nervously for just a second on her tight sleeveless white blouse before purposefully striding towards the trio, deciding whom to address first.
It's Emily, it will always be Emily.
"Hi Ems!" She says probably a bit too needily but quickly stops berating herself, they're friends and they haven't seen each other properly in two weeks.
She's further sated and even made to blush when Emily breathes, "Wow, Naoms, you look amazing!"
Naomi grins at Emily and her heart beats a little faster but a potential reconciling moment is marred by Cook's intrusive vulgarity, "Yes Wheels, you are looking good to go. Or should I say Legs?" he sticks his tongue out and makes a show of looking at Naomi's barely covered lower half. She cringes without hiding it but still subtly tries to pull the skirt down. It crosses her mind encouragingly that it doesn't make her feel physically sick when Emily looks at her form. Emily is a cute perve. Was she perving? She hopes.
Naomi ignores him and plasters on her worst fake smile for Effy, seriously wishing she were letting anyone else in the entire world but her into her house.
"Effy. To what do we owe the honor of your presence here?" she says through gritted teeth. No seriously, tell me why the fuck we're all forced to go out together and pretend like I don't wanna rip you limb from limb?
"Well Cook has been away for a while and wanted to check out the delights of Camden nightlife."
Naomi spies Emily shifting from foot to foot looking uncomfortable before the brunette continues coolly,
"And he suggested that we invite some of the people he met at the last party, so he decided he wanted to bring you and your boyfriend."
Naomi's jaw physically drops at the insinuation, "My-my what?"
"Boyfriend." Emily says and looks at Naomi with so much guilt, as if she's really saying I'm sorry! Instead of; "Tall, dark, handsome guy, you lucky thing!"
The blonde looks between Emily's pleading face that asks her to go along with it, and Effy's shimmering dark blue orbs that Naomi wouldn't have liked to believe that they contain much restraint and regret and then finally Cook's obliviously happy wolfish grin. Eventually she takes a deep breath, holds her tongue and downs her full glass of wine, barely wincing as she turns around without another word and leads them into her home. Cook seems impressed when he yells, "Top notch Blondie!" as she bounces along to catch up with them.
Once back in the living room Naomi immediately refills her glass and takes another large gulp. She notices Emily somberly say "Hi" to Freddie with her shoulders hunched.
Giving herself something to do and stalling the inevitably intense awkwardness in the room, Naomi fixes Freddie a drink and takes it to him before sitting on the arm of the sofa nearest to him. She could feel Cook's lecherous eyes on her the whole time, making her skin crawl. Freddie thanks her and his eyes look red from the spliff, making it look like he's been crying, which would probably be an accurate assumption too.
Just as she thought her night couldn't get any worse, Cook pipes up from behind his can of Special Brew and licks his lips when looking at Naomi, "How long you two kids been together then?"
Naomi hears Emily choke and then cough on whatever she had just been drinking and the blonde suddenly starts to sweat. Freddie looks up at her, confusion etched on his face, "Naomi? What-" she closes her eyes at the realization that Effy's fake arrangement for the two of them was not discussed with Freddie.
Panda squeaks, "Stupid! They aren't-"
"Shut up." Effy cuts her off in her monotonous tone.
Cook reiterates for the group, "I mean how long have you been making monkey with a bangable little piece like her man? Lucky cunt Fredster!" he finishes with his eyebrows waggling and his mangy laugh.
"We're not-" Freddie rambles, out of sorts.
"Three years!" Naomi interrupts and glares at Freddie begging him to trust her. "We met at Uni in Bristol." Completely ignoring for the time being how Cook had spoken about her and how exposed it made her feel. She carries on, grabs Freddie's hand who seems to have caught on and laces her fingers with his, "We were on the same course and he would sit right behind me in every lecture. Eventually I asked him out and… we…fell in love." The lie tumbles out more easily than she thought it would and Cook is satisfied.
She had seen Freddie look at Effy meaningfully throughout it all. But she looks as unaffected and disinterested as ever. Naomi can feel her anger rising that threatens to erupt when she glances at Emily who is staring into her drink hard and keeping as quiet as a mouse. Offering no kind of relief to her friend.
She has to get out of here. "Baby?" She addresses Freddie, "I'll be right back, I just have to go to the bathroom." And then makes sure Effy is watching her as she kisses him softly for a good three seconds.
As soon as she leaves the room she realises she's being followed and decides to carry on going down the hall instead, to her bedroom where she could at least talk properly without fear of being overheard.
Emily closes her door behind her and starts huskily, "I'm so sorry Naoms,"
"This is a fucking pantomime!" the blonde shrieks, furious but almost relieved that she has someone to plot with.
Emily shortens the distance between them to try and offer some form of comfort to the distressed beauty, "I know! I'm sorry, we tried to get him to go somewhere else but he seems to have taken a liking to you." She says, instantly feeling dirty.
"I don't want him in my house Emily! He's a pig, have you heard the things he says to me?"
"Yes I've heard!" the red-head cries fuming, "He's vile and I've always hated him but never as much as I do tonight!"
Naomi sits on her bed heavily and runs her fingers through her hair. Emily can't help but think she looks incredibly sexy doing that. "Why didn't you warn Freddie about Effy and him? Why didn't you tell me?"
Sensing the blonde needs some space Emily perches on a set of drawers, careful to not knock any of Naomi's personal things on display.
The petite girl sighs before saying apologetically, "Neither of us knew when he was coming back. We didn't even know he knew where to find us."
"Fucking great." Naomi dead-pans, "What are we involved in Emily? Just how dangerous is this prick?"
Emily looks around the girl's room slightly, she is saddened that this is the first time she has seen it and it's such an unhappy occasion. She drinks in all the small details and decorations that scream Naomi and she is surrounded by smells that are so Naomi it makes her knees weak.
She looks at the girl who is radiating hurt and anguish and Emily's heart thuds thickly as she worries her bottom lip.
"He was sent to prison when we were all still in college. He beat up a guy within an inch of his life because he couldn't stand the way this poor guy was looking at Effy."
"Jesus Christ." Naomi whispers, rubbing her temples.
"He was always a bit of a dick in college, eyeing up other women, but he was loveable and he loves Effy. Like fierce you know? And Effy loved him in her own way. But when he did that…she wanted to leave. So I left with her."
"And now he's back." She adds uselessly.
Emily nods sadly. "She loves Freddie. More than she's ever loved anyone. It's killing her having to pretend to be with Cook, just so he won't beat the crap out of him. I hear her crying in the kitchen nearly every night when Cook's asleep."
"I don't care about Effy. I care about how fucking destroyed Freddie is and how fucked up this all is! I don't understand why she doesn't just tell Cook to get fucked and be with Freddie!"
Emily moves from the dresser not able to watch Naomi be devastated a second longer, she gets within arms reach of the beautiful blonde and pulls her down and into her gently so that she's holding her. Naomi seems to lose her bearings suddenly but recovers by wrapping her long arms around Emily's petite frame and squeezes her back.
She doesn't know how long they just were standing there close together but she forgets to figure it out when Emily softly says into the crease of her chest and arm, "Even if Cook did leave if she asked him, would she ask Freddie to be with her? I don't think they were ever official." Emily hates that phrase. "It's her mess. She needs to fix it. All we can do is be there for our friends."
Naomi breathes deeply savoring the fact she can smell Emily's shampoo and perfume, and lays her insecurities on the line, "You're my friend Ems. But you haven't exactly been there for me either."
Emily nods against Naomi's blouse, her eyes closed from the feeling, "I know," she says softly, "I'm sorry. But I'm back now."
I have absolutely no idea where the Cook hate came from but its fun :) I do actually love him as a character but this is how he turned out in Starbooks.
I'm sorry if there are any mistakes, please let me know if you like the story and where you think it's gonna go :D
Any guesses on Emily's favourite book yet? :P Cheers everyone!
