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"The source of evil is desire, greed, and anger."― Aleksandra Layland
Bird stood in the doorway leading into the room where the press was set up for the mayor's announcement. There were rows of blue chairs facing a podium, and television cameras off to the sides and at the very back of the room. Pulling in a deep breath she cursed Falcone in her head for not giving her much time to figure out what she'd need to say once those cameras were rolling.
Slowly exhaling and finding a bit of calm amongst the chaos going on in the side room she'd been placed in, she considered that on second thought she might actually pull this off better going on a whim than if she'd had days of planning for it.
This was nothing but playing a role, getting out there with a smile plastered on and saying the things everyone wanted to hear. Just another deception, she told herself. Besides, Don Falcone wasn't the type of person you could easily say no to.
"Miss Wayne."
Turning around she saw Mayor James heading towards her.
"Mayor James." She greeted returning the smile and handshake he offered.
She'd never cared much for Gotham's current mayor, of course she understood the need to bend in order to keep from getting broken by the crime families in the city, but this compromise he'd came to –to save his own skin wasn't good for anyone. All he was doing was showcasing how weak he was, that with the first threat on his life he'd do anything to appease all the parties involved as long as it kept him safe.
"I'm glad you could be here tonight." He continued, "I know news of the compromise might not be an easy pill to swallow for the people of Gotham, but in the end I believe it's the best option for everyone. It's the plan the city needs."
The smile remained on her lips, but an almost blank expression fell over her brown eyes as she stared back at him in disbelief. He was trying to sell the idea to her as if she couldn't think and see for herself the many flaws it possessed.
"Save it for the cameras." Bird replied, her voice steady as she looked around them.
With a startled expression he asked, "I'm sorry?"
"You heard me." Bird said with a stern tone to her voice, "I mean being under Falcone's influence is one thing, but bending over for Maroni too? That's a new low… even for you."
His mouth hung open in shock as he stared back at her, his cheeks and the edges of his ears had taken on a red hue from anger at what she'd said.
Taking a step forward he growled under his breath, "They tried to kill me."
"Mayor James, if I had a dollar for every time someone threatened me or actually tried to kill me…" Her voice trailed off and she gave a small shrug before adding in an arrogant laced tone, "Well, I guess it doesn't matter. I'm a Wayne, the one thing I don't need more of is money."
"Good, I've caught you both here. We're going live in about four minutes."
They both turned to see one of the media liaisons for the mayor's office scrambling towards them with a wooden clipboard in her arms.
"We'll start everything off with the Mayor's speech, after which Miss Wayne will take over –say a few words, and then it will go back to the Mayor where we've allowed time for a small question and answer segment." She said, looking frazzled as her eyes darted between them.
"Sounds great." Bird feigned enthusiasm, as the dread in the pit of her stomach started to grow.
"Here." The woman said, as she pulled a paper off the clipboard and handed it to Bird, "I drew up a small outline and suggestions of what to say, you know, in case you start to freeze up in front of the cameras."
"Thanks…" She breathed, taking the paper in her hands which she barely had time to glance over before she and the mayor were ushered from the side room to the front of the room filled with reporters.
Bird stood back some and off to the side as the mayor delivered his speech, detailing ways in which this plan for Arkham would be best for the city. She kept a smile on her face despite it taking all of the restraint she had to not roll her eyes every single time he opened his mouth. By the end of his dialogue she'd completely blocked out what he said, it wasn't until she heard her own name that her thoughts came back to the present.
As she listened and watched Mayor James introduce her with the upmost politeness and respect, despite the encounter they'd had several minutes prior, her knees started to feel like they were composed of jello with toothpick bones that could splinter and give way at any moment.
It was just a few short steps until she reached the podium, steps that felt treacherous with her weak legs. Laying the sheet of paper down on the wood, she gripped the sides so tight her knuckles immediately started to turn a ghost white shade, "Thank you, Mayor James." She said nodding with a smile as he stepped to the side to let her take the center of the room and the press' attention.
Her breath caught in her throat as she looked around the room and any words she'd been plotting in her head seemed to dissipate, leaving no trace behind as her stomach felt like she had a full blown tsunami raging inside of it.
Managing to pull her eyes away from all the faces staring at her, eagerly awaiting to hear what she had to say. Bird looked down to the paper, her eyes frantically trying to take in the suggested talking points and lines she could use if she lost her way, urgently she searched for something she could say and build off of –a saving grace of some sort; but there wasn't one. Nothing written on that page sounded like anything she'd ever say and it was far too late to back down now.
Hearing a low rumble of whispers go through the room, Bird knew she had to say something –at this point it felt like anything would suffice.
Crumpling up the paper she'd placed on the podium, she let the paper ball fall to the floor next to her feet as she took in a deep breath and looked back out to everyone in the room.
"They, uh… they gave me a paper of talking points I was supposed to use if I got lost up here." Bird admitted, with a small smile she nodded to the crumpled paper on the floor and added, "Turns out it wasn't very helpful."
A few laughs sounded from around the room in response to her words and honesty, a welcome relief to the cold silence or rumble of whispers.
"When I was first asked to speak here tonight, I was caught off guard. Both because I was going to be speaking at an event with the Mayor and because I wasn't expecting the outcome of the decision that was reached. I was asked to stand up here in front of all of you and feed you some lines about how this is what my parent's would have wanted if they were still with us, but once I got here –I really started to ask myself: Is this compromise between the Wayne plan and the opposing plan really something my mother and father could have supported?"
Her voice trailed, off as she looked around the room of reporters –all waiting silently with their eyes glued to her. She could also feel the mayor and his staff staring at her nervously, afraid she was going to screw things up or say something she shouldn't. But not a one of them dared to try and shoo her away from the cameras, not only was this live TV but she was doing what she was supposed to; she'd captivated the audience, had them hanging on her every word.
She was appearing likeable and friendly, which had been her plan all along. She'd thought that if she could make her speech a warm and welcome contrast to the Mayor's speech of laying out cold facts –that she'd have their trust. There was a time and place for everything; right now was the time for her to seem as human and as believable as possible.
"Do you?" A voice came from the crowd. It wasn't open time for questions and the audience of reporters and press knew that, but even so one male reporter stood up as he asked, "Do you think your parents would have been happy with this outcome?"
Looking from the cameras at the back of the room, to the brave soul who'd dared to be the voice in the sea of quiet, Bird answered, "No."
A collective gasp filled the room, and she waited for the silence to return before she continued, "Not at first. My parents, especially my mother felt so passionately about The Wayne Plan for the Arkham District –every single piece and every single square foot was mapped out. I'm sure that if they'd lived to see this decision, it would have first felt like a failure to them –as I'm sure it does to many of you. But the longer I sat with the idea, the more I was able to see it clearly. This is nothing short of a win for Gotham City."
Bird paused again for dramatic effect as she looked back over the crowd, "It may not be the plan that most of us wanted to succeed in the beginning, but I truly think this compromise of the two plans is a blessing in disguise. And I know, that given some time to think everything over my parent's would have supported it as well. They wanted to help Gotham's least fortunate and that's exactly what this plan will do with the low income housing being constructed and the asylum being refurbished."
Scanning the room again, she politely smiled as she said, "Thank you."
With a slight bow of her head, she stepped back and let the mayor reclaim his spot at the podium when the floor was opened up for questions.
The room stayed silent for a few moments, before a reporter asked, "Mayor James, do you feel like the outcome is a failure of The Wayne Plan?"
Raising a dismissive hand and swiping it through the air, he shook his head, "This is not a case of either plan failing. This is a case of compromise for what's best for the people of Gotham. The Arkham District will be developed into low cost housing as well as a much needed waste disposal site. This is the best of both plans, together in one."
Motioning back to where Bird was standing, he added, "I think Starling Wayne said it best; this compromise is a blessing in disguise. It's the plan that is best suited for our city." Looking straight into the camera at the center of the back of the room, he finished, "Gotham needs- No, Gotham deserves a world class treatment facility for the mentaly ill. And I know that if Thomas and Martha Wayne were still alive they would have been proud of what we were able to accomplish today; who better to have heard that from than their eldest child?" With that, he stepped to the side and motioned to Bird as he politely thanked her for being there and for sharing her views, earning a round of applause of everyone in the room.
~(Later that night)~
After changing into her sleeping clothes for the night, Bird walked out of her bathroom and dropped her dress from earlier that night into the dirty clothes hamper by her dresser before she turned back to look at Oswald not only sleeping in her bed, but on the side she always slept on.
When she'd first came into her apartment after getting home and didn't see him on the couch, she had a moment of panic wondering what had happened and where he was until she went into her bedroom and found him asleep on her bed
Not that she minded too much, after the night she'd had and knowing that very soon she'd have to face her brother who'd have an endless list of questions about why she'd say the things she said at the press conference –it was nice knowing she was coming home to someone who wouldn't be the least bit mad or judge her over what she'd said on the news
Pulling the blankets back she crawled into the empty side of her bed and covered up, flipping onto her side and facing in his direction with a small surprised gasp when she realized he was awake and looking at her.
"Hey." She greeted. Her voice carried with it the scent of alcohol on her breath and he realized the reason she'd gotten home so late after the press conference was because she'd clearly hit a least a few bars on the way back to her apartment.
"I saw you on the news." He stated, doing his best to pretend like he had no idea Falcone was going to call on her to speak that night.
"Yeah…" She breathed, closing her eyes and snuggling her unwashed face against the pillows, leaving dark smudges from her eye makeup as she confided, "I kind of hate myself for that. I hate myself even more for not having the courage to face Bruce tonight, I should have gone by the house right after the conference but I was too chicken."
His eyes scanned her face as he said with a half-smile, "You are a lot of things Bird, but cowardly isn't one of them."
"He's gonna hate me, you know. He won't understand why I did what I did…" Her voice trailed off as she took in a loud breath she nearly choked on before slurring, "Can I tell you a secret?"
Oswald let out a small chuckle at the question as he answered, "You can tell me anything, Bird."
"I think my parents would have disowned me today."
Raising up, slightly he watched with a serious expression on his face as she buried her face further into the pillow muffling her voice as she admitted, "I kept waiting for it, you know? Before they died… all the bad I'd done, I just kept thinking something would finally be enough that they'd be done with me. But they didn't. The worse of a person I became the more they tried to show how much they loved me. It's sick. It's so sick how much I tested them, I don't even know why I did it. I don't know… I guess –I guess I just knew I was never good enough for them, that no matter what I did, I wouldn't be deserving of the Wayne name and it's so messed up but I wanted them to tell me that." Her whole body shifted on the mattress as she tried to shrug.
"You did what you had to do." Oswald tried to assure her, starting to feel a pit of guilt inside of him for being responsible for putting the idea in Falcone's head to have Bird talk at the press conference. But he'd only allow himself to feel guilt to a certain degree. After all; if she'd never decided to go on a date with Harvey Dent, then he wouldn't have ever had to present the idea to Falcone in the first place. She was his Bird; which in his mind completely justified his actions.
"I'm gonna miss you." She mumbled; her words seeming even more slurred or more muffled from the pillow. He couldn't be sure, all he knew was he could barely understand her now and she hadn't seemed to be listening to what he'd last told her.
"Miss me?" He asked, laying a hand on her arm and shaking her when she didn't answer him.
"Yeah." She nodded, rubbing more of her dark eye makeup off onto her pillow case before raising up slightly to look at him with red eyes that seemed unable to focus on anything, "After Maroni finds out who you really are and then Fish knows you're alive. We'll have to part ways, you know? Too risky to be seen together."
He let out a troubled sigh at her words. The thought had crossed his mind several times too, the idea of a period of time where the risk of even speaking to one another would pose too great a risk. Oswald considered for a brief moment that –that may have been why the idea of her starting to date anyone right now was unbearable. Without him around, she'd have plenty of time to get close to someone else.
"I'd rather not think about it." Oswald admitted with a sour feeling growing in his stomach.
"Me either." Bird agreed, turning onto her back and laying her arm over her eyes to block out any traces of light, "It makes me feel ill."
His gaze darted back in Bird's direction, slightly widened from the admission she'd just made.
The thought of not being able to stay in contact with him made her feel ill? He couldn't deny that brought him an almost perverse satisfaction.
"We're not just friends… we're twisted up in one another." She added, her voice slightly distorted as she yawned and turned to face away from him.
His eyebrows lowered at the statement which had first seemed to be the beginning of another of her alcohol fueled rambles –until she stopped talking, that was.
"Bird?" He called out in the room, feeling like he was only speaking to the air now.
When she didn't answer, he reached a hand over and started to shake her, but just as his hand landed on her arm she flung her other arm up and slapped his hand with lightning fast speed.
Jerking back, he held onto his now sore hand as he stared at her with a look of disbelief on his face –unable to tell whether she was asleep or just no longer wished to speak to him.
"Goodnight, then." He mumbled, as he flopped on his other side to face away from her –moving around in the bed as much as possible to make sure it would disrupt her if she was sleeping.
~(The next day)~
The sun was starting to set as Bird drove up the long driveway to Wayne Manor. The red and orange painted waves in the sky mixed with the shadows from the large trees caused the mansion to feel more imposing than usual.
Her stomach had been twisted in knots for the better part of the day and she'd put off coming to see her brother for as long as possible. She'd even stopped on the way there at a small café to get a coffee and try calling Harvey Dent to apologize again for running out on him the night before during their date, but he didn't pick up. Not that she blamed him much, if the tables had been reversed she wasn't entirely sure she'd answer the call either.
Bothering her more than anything was how much it was bothering her that he wouldn't answer her calls. She didn't know him very well and their first date involved a heated debate in which at one point he looked angry enough to start throwing things, and ended with her running off without any explanation. She knew she hadn't given him much of a reason to want to see her again, but deep down it was upsetting to know she was so easily dismissed.
Shifting into park, she shut her car off and left the keys in the ignition as she blew a heavy sigh. It was probably for the best that Harvey wasn't up for talking to her anyways, she thought, even if he hadn't seen the press conference the night before –he was sure to have caught parts of it on the news since then. He'd probably have his own fair share of questions regarding why she was openly backing a compromise that wasn't good for anyone.
What could she possibly tell him then? That she was a criminal and had been asked by Don Falcone himself to speak in front of the cameras on the issue? That she'd chosen to betray her family because a crime boss had asked her too? She'd seen the night before just how strongly he felt about organized crime –going so far as to not even eat at a restaurant in either Falcone or Maroni's territories.
Pushing all thoughts of Harvey out of her head, she somehow mustered the strength to push open her car door and step outside, just in time to hear loud thunder rumbling in the distance.
Once she was inside, she took her time walking through the house. Hoping she might encounter Alfred and could ask him just how mad her younger brother was, but unfortunately the butler was nowhere in sight and before long she found herself at the entrance of her fathers office –the room it seemed Bruce was living out of now.
Stepping into the room, she saw him sitting at the desk with a pair of headphones on. As she walked closer she could hear the heavy beat thudding through the small speakers and a look of confusion spread over her face as she realized her brother was listening to metal music. Something completely out of character for him.
Noticing he was no longer alone in the room, he pulled the headphones off his ears and reached down to hit the stop button on the cassette player.
"Since when do you listen to heavy metal?" Bird questioned, as she walked around the desk and scooted back to sit on it, next to the notebook he'd been writing in.
"Since I found the tapes in your old room." He simply answered. There was no need to look up at his sister to know the look of rage she was now surely wearing.
Even though she'd been moved out of the house for years now, she still had a lot of her things in her room there and couldn't stand the thought of anyone going in there to root through things.
"Why were you in my room?" Bird asked through gritted teeth as she tried to remain composed.
"Why did you lie on TV?" He shot back at her as his eyes narrowed in anger.
Bird's eyes also narrowed with the accusation she threw at Bruce, "You're acting like a child."
"I am not!" He yelled, suddenly more enraged with Bird than he had been when he'd first watched the press coverage on television the prior night.
"Are too." She screamed back at him; well aware the statement now made her sound like the childish one.
"How could you do that?" Bruce wasted no time in letting her know the pinpointed reason for the way he was feeling, "You didn't just lie in front of all those cameras. You… you said that mom and dad would have supported that plan and you know it isn't true. They worked so hard to get the Wayne plan to pass, it was so important to them!"
"It sucks, I know that." She lowered her voice, "But this compromise might have very well saved a lot of lives. Political leaders were being killed who supported the opposing plans, Maroni almost got to the mayor."
"Look around, Starling." Bruce yelled, gravel in his tone, "Our parents are gone. They're dead and now something they wanted so badly for this city died with them. How can you even sleep knowing that?"
Her jaw tensed as she stared at her younger brother, she wanted to lash out at him. She was the oldest after all and she really didn't appreciate the disrespectful tone he'd taken with her, but even she couldn't deny that she was deserving of his outburst.
Much like her parents, her brother also wanted a brighter future for Gotham than what the decided compromise could provide. Some days she honestly had trouble believing he was the younger sibling, he carried himself in such a way that possessed a wise-ness far beyond his years.
He seemed to almost understand everything, but Bird knew there were things about her world that he couldn't begin to comprehend.
"Everything they worked for is now falling into the hands of criminals, and you're just letting it happen." He accused, another bout of anger hitting him as he knocked a box of papers off the desk and Bird realized the office was now covered in stacks of boxes; all of them labeled Wayne Enterprises.
On a better day she would have asked him what on earth he'd been spending his time doing, but she knew today he was too angry to have a civil conversation with her and in truth she wasn't feeling so civil herself.
"You don't understand." Bird defended, her arms crossed over her chest as she leered darkly at him.
"Then explain it!" He demanded.
"The short and to the point version, Bruce… is that I was asked to speak at that conference by someone you can't really say no too."
His eyebrows furrowed, but his voice fell back into a suitable volume for speaking to someone in the same room as him, "There is always a choice, Starling. You just made the wrong one."
"See? You just don't get it!" She yelled, "It's so easy to make the hard decisions after-the-fact, and even easier to make them when you're sitting pretty inside these mansion walls."
"What is that supposed to mean?" He questioned, his voice raising again.
Rubbing her forehead she let out a weak laugh as she breathed, "Look, Bruce; you're young and you're smart and I know your heart is in the right place here –but outside the walls of Wayne Manor, there is no black and white. It's an entire world of gray area where the decisions aren't all so easy to make. It's a world where all those books you've read won't help you at all."
"Maybe there's no black and white in a gray area, but there is always right and wrong." He stated, and his words hit her like a ton of bricks. He was right and they both knew it, she was well aware of how badly she'd screwed up.
"You act tough and try to justify your actions, but you know the difference between right and wrong. You must know by now that you did the wrong thing." Bruce said to his older sister in a voice barely above a whisper as his anger started to turn back to into a pit of despair in his soul.
"Right and wrong… sure." She conceded, "But there's still gray between the lines and for some people the paths leading to the good and the bad look too similar to know which path you're on."
Still not willing to give up his end of their fight, he countered, "I don't believe that. Sometimes stepping up and doing what's right can be the hardest thing in the world, but you just do it anyways; because it's the right thing."
"Yeah? Well, sometimes my moral compass goes on the fritz in life and death situations."
The words came out before she could stop them and for a brief and fleeting moment the room fell into a complete dead silence, so much so that neither of them could even hear the flames and wood crackling in the fire place.
"Someone threatened your life?" He gathered, slowly walking closer to her.
"Not directly, but it wasn't hard to understand that what I was being asked to do was much more of an order than a request."
"Who was it?" Bruce asked her.
"It doesn't matter." Bird shrugged, "People like me are built to navigate the gray area and part of that is learning to pick my battles, especially with the most dangerous of people. I know I screwed up, Bruce. I know I let you down, but I did what I had to do to survive. It's not always pretty and sometimes I hate myself for it –but I'm still here. I'm a survivor –it's what I do."
Lightening flashed; violently illuminating the room for a few crackling seconds before another round of thunder shook the glass panes in the large windows.
Blinking from the harsh, bright blows of light from the storm, Bird looked back around the room before she slowly turned to leave.
"It's storming outside." Bruce commented, and Bird literally bit down on the side of her tongue to keep from making a bitchy comment on how he'd just pointed out the single most obvious thing in the world.
When she didn't reply and kept walking away he added, "You can stay until it dies down outside."
"Thanks little brother." She said with an arched brow as she looked over her shoulder as she reached the doorway, "But I think I've already worn out my welcome… and this is Gotham, sometimes the storms seem to last forever."
A/N- Thanks for reading!
I owe a huge thank you to Miss E Charlotte, SmellYourScentForMiles, and Love. Fiction .2016 for revewing chapter 9. Glad you're enjoying the story so far. ^_.^
As always reviews are greatly appreciated and you can follow me on tumblr for edits and story related posts. (sagelondyn)