Therapy
Written by MarySueIsDead
Chapter 10: Black - Part 2
~2003~
The blonde stared at her feet for most of the journey back; kicking rocks here and there that scattered across the lonely asphalt paved road. Buckley's convertible now far behind them; a faint cloud of dark smoke lingering above the trees was it's only remembrance as the fire died off and burned what was left of the expensive vehicle.
Rhonda led the two; her usually confident demeanor now gone as it reflected in her posture. She sulked somewhat while she trudged down the path to the nearest gas station.
Sparse cars passed them, none questioning their motives. Or the fact that the edges of their clothes had been burnt and frayed. So they were left with mostly silence and the subtle noise of nature surrounding them.
Helga let out a breath as the afternoon sun beat down on her head, and sweat wrung around her chest and back. She lightly shook her head to herself, thoughts crawling back to earlier. How could Rhonda throw the Arnold thing back in her face? And then somehow skew that into what was happening with Phoebe?
She didn't know what was going on with her and Phoebe's delicate relationship. Did she want to pursue it further? Yes. But she didn't think it would fix her. Maybe she just wanted to have a good time; bring back some of that childhood she had lost. There were no other ulterior notions.
Was Rhonda really that insecure? She seemed perfectly fine earlier in the bathroom. The lanky teenager rolled her blue eyes and brought her hand to her forehead to wipe off beads of perspiration. Obviously NOT fine.
Then it hit her. 'Oh God, was I the Arnold in this situation? Was I really so dense that I couldn't see it this whole time?' She glanced back up at her companion's back, Rhonda's thin grey hoodie darkened by her own sweat. 'And of course, I FREAKED, just like Arnold had so many years ago. How was I so...so...oblivious?'
It wasn't much longer that they reached the station along the lonely road. Worn down by decades of tourism, the establishment still held a certain charm to it. And it appeared as if a small diner had been connected at some point in time; like two buildings smushed together. The two girls entered, grateful for the air conditioning and fans that greeted them. One of the employees walked up, but with his ugly tie and fluffy brown mustache he looked more like a manager. "Goodness gracious, you ladies look like you've been through hell and back!" He exclaimed as he rubbed his polished bald head in surprise. "What can I do for ya'?"
Rhonda grinned weakly and combed her fingers through her hair, letting a few ashes fall from her black locks. "We've been walking for a while and don't have any money…" She exhaled and crouched down, untying the laces of her shoes and Helga's eyes widened to witness the wealthy teenager slip out of the sneakers and pick them up. "But...these tennis shoes are from Nancy Spumoni's Fit Collection Fall '02; even pre-owned they're worth five hundred dollars. We'd definitely appreciate it if we could get some food and a phone call."
The large bellied manager crossed his arms. "Shit. Did you two escape from one of those backwoods cults? Look, don't worry about it, find a booth in the diner and sit down. I'll bring you ladies some food." He responded as they glanced over into the dining area and he turned to walk into a back room of some sorts.
The girls walked over and sat down at one of the red plastic booths, letting their anxious eyes graze upon every detail in the establishment, but each other. 'Quaint place.' The blonde thought as Rhonda bent over the side of her seat to put her shoes back on.
Once she sat up, the wealthy teenager fiddled her thumbs together and continued to browse around, eventually looking over by the cash register. "The um...the phone's over there." She gestured quietly, afraid her words might cause another argument.
Helga peered over as well but sighed aloud. "I'm not going to leave you. God knows you probably would get picked up by a cult without me here. Or start leading one."
"I thought you...definitely hated me."
She sniffed and adjusted her crooked glasses; staring intently at her hands upon the well-used table. "I um...I don't hate you." She started off, figuring out how to continue. "I'm...I'm sad...I'm sad you felt like you had to hold in these feelings for who knows how long...and I'm sad because I held in mine for Arnold...probably even longer than that. I'm sad because...you felt like you couldn't say it without..."
"Looking like a complete psycho?" Rhonda interrupted with a crooked grin, finding her sad state of affairs somewhat humorous.
Helga stopped talking, silent with her thoughts.
The dark haired girl responded calmly. "Helga, It may be hard to believe, but I want what you want. I want to escape the...god, how could you even describe it?"
"Dark...smoke hazed room?"
Rhonda paused for a second but nodded in agreement. "The dark smoke hazed room. But...that room has been my entire life. When the most prominent...aspect is removed from me...who am I?"
Helga nibbled on the side of her lip before uttering her more profound thoughts. "...You may not see or know yourself, but I do, even in the darkness. You're an incredible, ambitious person...and you've been stagnant and you're noticing that. Some people don't notice that they're meant for much more. So...I think that means you care about yourself." She reached for Bliss' wisdom in the corners of her mind, even though she definitely wasn't someone who should be giving out advice.
"I thought if I could make my parents happy; you happy, then I'd be happy. I don't know what to do when it doesn't turn out that way."
The blonde grumbled as so many of those Bliss sessions came back to her all at once. The woman had been annoyingly right about everything, and she was rather despaired that her former therapist wasn't sitting at the table with them right now. She would know exactly what to say. "You make yourself happy..." She absentmindedly flicked the silverware on the table. "Trust me...it's not easy."
Rhonda pursed her lips at the compliment. "You think I'm ambitious?"
Helga let a small smile creep through. "I envision you being the CEO of a big major corporation someday. A powerful, sexy woman."
"Oh yeah?" The wealthy girl chuckled gently. "And where would you be?"
She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, sulking into the plastic seat. "Shit if I know."
Rhonda placed her hands together in playful thought. "Well, I think you'd become a hippie. Living out in a cabin in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere. I'd have to fly in one of my fancy 'very sexy and powerful' helicopters to come visit you."
They both grinned for the moment before Helga's disappeared. Who was she? She thought she was Helga G. Pataki. A rootin' tootin' she-devil from the bowels of Olga's forgotten awards and trophies. But maybe there was something else inside her. Maybe something that only Phoebe and Arnold had pinpointed with their rose-colored goggles. Maybe she was...nice. Maybe she was...caring. The idea made goosebumps trail upon her spine.
She apprehensively inhaled, and with a clammy palm, reached across the table for Rhonda's right hand; taking it into her own. This...young woman had sacrificed a lot to tell her three simple words. She would not be the Arnold in this situation. "Look...I'm terrified of losing you too. You never gave me a reason to doubt how much you wanted me in your life. That's something that was so rare for me...and it's horribly addicting. Most of the time when I was having a bad day, all I wanted to do was run to you. Have you fuck me until I was senseless, and get so numb off of weed and alcohol. Maybe...maybe I don't know who I am either...without it. Without you."
Rhonda saturated the words and stared down at their hands, brushing her thumb over her companion's skin reassuringly. She stated her words confidently, as they had been floating around in her mind for a while. "You're Helga G. Pataki. You kick so much ass without even trying, yet...you're incredibly human. You're my best friend. You're…" She released a shallow breath. "You're my fuckin' heroine." Her voice cracked as the waiter came up and noticed their affectionate gesture.
"Ah, it was one of those cults, huh?" He set down the servings of steaming hot food in front of them along with two waters. "Chef's choice. Plus that meat is going to expire tomorrow, so now I have a reason to get rid of it for no charge."
"Thank you." The dark haired teenager spoke up before Helga could say anything and their hands parted as they tended to the burgers on the plates.
"Don't mention it!" He called back as he walked away.
The two girls dug into the meal. Helga, a little more rambunctiously since all she had this morning was toast and coffee. She could've eaten more, but browsing through the Heyerdahl family photo album seemed like a better distraction.
Rhonda repressed a giggle as she watched the grease drip over her friend's mouth as the blonde took another hearty bite. Sure she was hungry too, but another feeling of satisfaction filled her insides; her appetite could momentarily wait. "By the way, everything I did for you; the sex, the weed, the alcohol...It was all out of love. So you didn't have to...remember..."
The blonde swallowed her big bite uneasily, staring back into Rhonda's vulnerable brown eyes. 'Now was the time to say something...nice, Helga ole' girl.' "Well...I- I appreciate that...but I'm not abusing your love anymore. And you shouldn't let anyone do that to you, even me, because...you are so much more than your status and money."
The wealthy teenager felt her skin flutter at the words and she took a polite munch into her own delicious greasy burger. The sounds of their chewing, and sips from drinking, were the only noises currently in the diner besides the old rotating fans and creaky air ducts.
"You wanna know something else?" Rhonda asked after she swallowed.
"Hmm?" Helga mumbled as she took another bite of her sloppy meal.
"I think you're crazy drop dead gorgeous."
The lanky girl immediately choked on the food in her esophagus and quickly grabbed for her water, hoping to wash over the frantic reaction of her body.
Rhonda smirked proudly to herself. "This truth stuff is pretty cool."
Miss Pataki rolled her eyes playfully after she managed to swallow the bun trapped in her surprised throat. She attempted not to smile.
The wealthy teenager then sighed as she set down her burger and looked over at the phone by the register again. She requested kindly. "Walk with me...just a little longer. And then we'll hitch a ride back into the city. Both of us."
XOXOX
They trudged on a couple more miles; less silently as the two reminisced on favorite moments of their youth. When finally a car pulled over along the side of the deserted path; it's two passengers an elderly couple.
The woman poked her head out the passenger side window. "You ladies look like our grandson's age! Do you need a ride?"
"Where you all headed?" The man asked.
Rhonda walked up to their vehicle, since she was the better negotiator and people-person in general. "Oh yes, that would be splendid. If you're headed towards New York City, we're going to a little neighborhood called Hillwood, right by Queens."
"Oh, I think I've heard of that one before. We're headed to Connecticut for our Grandson's acceptance into Yale. The whole family is celebrating! We can drop you off on the way there!" He exclaimed in a friendly tone.
"Oh, congratulations! That's so awesome! Thank you!"
The two girls got into the back of the vehicle and attempted to get comfortable on the maroon velvet covered seats.
"Hope you like Johnny Cash!" The driver said as he glanced into the rear view mirror and started to pull away from the side of the road.
Helga felt optimistic; she was pretty sure with her fists and Rhonda's well...wacky spontaneity, they'd be able to take out these two geezers just incase they were secret axe-murderers.
"Oh, Ray, we've been listening to that darn tape since we left Chicago!" The older woman chided.
"It's my favorite tape!"
The blonde browsed out the window and spotted the nearest mile marker; from her small knowledge of Pennsylvania, they must've had around an hour and a half left until they would reach Hillwood again. She breathed out a huff of air, at least now they had wheels.
She peered over at Miss Lloyd who gazed out her own window. Rather reserved with her thoughts, which was a rarity. Helga glanced up at the elderly couple and discreetly scooted closer to her friend, quietly taking Rhonda's wrist, lifting it over her golden head as she rested it onto her shoulder while leaning into her friend's side.
The wealthy teenager's eyes widened in surprise at the gesture but smiled at the flicker of normalcy. Something she longed for but could never seem to reach. She pulled Helga closer in response.
"How much do you think your dad is going to kill you?" The blonde whispered, casually snuggling into her partner's side, as if this were an everyday thing. Was it so wrong to want to be normal for a goddamn hour or two?
Rhonda chuckled lowly. "I'll probably be grounded for a year. Not to mention, the insurance won't cover it." She then exhaled heavily. "It's fine. It'll be a change, but I'll have to be okay with it. Not being able to do whatever I want all the time."
"You're going to have to sneak out because I don't think I'll be able to climb to your bedroom window on the twentieth floor to visit you."
Miss Lloyd bounced her perfect eyebrows. "We'll see."
They both listened to 'Cocaine Blues' play over the stereo and Rhonda grinned to herself, her fingers grazing over the burnt edges of her friend's t-shirt. Helga had every right to hate her, but somehow she didn't. Not being hated...felt nice.
After a couple moments, the blonde spoke up softly again. "You're warm you know."
She inquisitively looked down at her companion. "What?"
"Your body. It's always warm." Helga reiterated, shifting slightly under the touch of her partner. A faint blush rose upon her cheeks at the words that escaped her conscious.
The wealthy teenager smirked and sunk deeper into the car seat, pulling Helga lower with her. "You know what I like the best about your body?" She asked promiscuously.
"Oh, criminy." The lanky girl muttered as she anxiously peered up at the older passengers of the vehicle, instantly regretting her confession, yet a smile resided on her lips.
"Those little dimples above your ass cheeks; drive me wild."
Helga snickered and lightly nudged Rhonda in the ribs. "You only stuck around me for my ass dimples."
"Well, you apparently craved my warmth."
The blonde hesitated then stared up into Miss Lloyd's brown eyes. Eyes that were usually darkened by the barriers of popularity and prestige. However now they sparkled with hues of amber, reflecting uncommon susceptibility. "It reminded me that...the world wasn't as cold as it seemed."
Rhonda just grinned genuinely at her friend and squeezed their bodies closer. Brushing her hand up and down Helga's arm to in a comforting attempt to warm her up as she gazed back out the window, knowing the normalcy wouldn't last for long, but maybe all the craziness to get to normalcy was worth it.
~2002~
She was drunk, but not drunk enough as a young man from her drama class stood a little too closely as he went on and on about his successful audition for Macbeth in their high school's rendition of well, Macbeth.
Rhonda took a polite sip of her drink as she adjusted the large crown atop her head and shifted in her black gown. She was bored of this dull conversation and her mind began to brew a headache. Her eyes wandering for Helga in the partying crowd of her parent's penthouse; her thoughts pondered an escape from this 'shmo'.
When she noticed the flicker of the red mask and shimmering crimson pants, she smiled and handed the alcoholic beverage to her classmate. "I must tend to my other guests." She interrupted his ramble and walked away.
The hostess made her way towards the blonde as she observed Iggy talking to her tipsy friend. Hearing bits of their conversation as she neared closer, speculating the old worn pink cotton of his bunny suit; 'Christ, what was he, eight years old?' She really needed to stop being so lenient on these invitations and start weeding out the un-cools.
"So, yeah, you should totally come back to my place. We can, you know, see what happens?" He asked as he shuffled nervously in his costume and took a sip of the drink in his hand.
Helga chuckled to herself, her rosy cheeks brimmed with intoxicated humor, even though no one could see it. "You're saying you...w-want to hook up with me?"
He shrugged and disclosed a small grin. "Yeah, why not? You're pretty rad, Pataki."
Rhonda interrupted the conversation that was making her nauseous. "Excuse us, Iggy, I must borrow Helga. Pressing lady matters." She said briefly as she took her friend's wrist and led them away from the young man in the bunny suit.
Iggy groaned rather audibly as he watched them walk away in the crowd. "Real COOL, Rhonda!"
The wealthy hostess brought them outside to the balcony where sparse classmates resided, either for a smoke or a nap on the patio furniture. "Did you see that?" Helga exclaimed as Rhonda reluctantly let go. "He totally wanted a piece of this!"
The dark haired girl sighed. "Before you make any rash decisions, let's just...take in some fresh air.." She placed her hands on her hips and took in a lungful of the brisk night atmosphere herself.
The lanky teenager snorted and swayed her drink around, it's contents splashing about. "Are you...Are you jealous?"
"Helga, you're super drunk."
"You- You're drunk." She laughed awkwardly and took a gulp of the alcoholic liquid.
Rhonda rolled her eyes and brushed the sleeves of her gown. "Not drunk enough, apparently." She winced at the looming headache that scattered across her brain from her drama partner's shpiel earlier.
Helga hummed a little tune and wobbled, finally thrusting her arms into the air; her drink sloshed again. "Fuck it! I- I haven't felt this great in a really long time! Y-You know what I wa- want right now?"
The hostess slyly smiled, knowing her companion was probably so intoxicated, she could say whatever she wanted and the blonde wouldn't remember. "What is it, Precious?"
Helga stuck out her pointer finger and it danced along to some random melody in her head. She eventually pointed to Rhonda. "You. You look fucking hot in that getup. Like you're about to...behead some peasants or some shit. It's bitchin'." She chuckled to herself and took another swig of her drink.
"You want me?" The wealthy teenager asked skeptically. Sure they fooled around, but most of the time it came from boredom, or the spikes of hormones they frequented at their age. Most of it was initiated by her, since she felt...a certain affection for her fond hellion recently.
Was it a crush…? Was it... something more? Not like she could turn to her parents with such questions. Helga didn't have a lot of money. She wasn't a model. And she wasn't some chiseled rich boy gallantly riding up on a white horse.
It took being around Helga on a daily basis to realize that she actually could enjoy the simpler things in life. Like eating corn dogs on the blonde's bed watching a movie and falling asleep on the crumbs. Or sitting with her friend on a disgusting bus to Dinoland for half-price day.
Is this what that something more was…? Not giving a shit about anything around but the person you were with? It felt good...to not give a shit.
"Did I s-stutter, Princess?"
Rhonda took a dignified step and came in closer, her lips smirking. "I'm a queen tonight." She said as started to care less, staring into Helga's blue eyes through thick lenses and red eye holes from the mask. She calmly placed her hands on the girl's bare waist.
Helga raised her hand in the air only to nonchalantly toss her drink somewhere past them, onto the ground of the balcony, maybe over the ledge, who knows, and drunkenly wrapped her arms around the hostess's neck. "Prove it. Fuckin' throw me against this wall and take me, like a queen." She egged on.
Rhonda's smug grin deepened and she moved her hand to scoot the blonde's glasses from her eyes, upward to rest on the top of her head. "If I'm going to take you, I want to be the only thing you see right now."
"Well you're in luck, because I see two of you."
The wealthy teenager pushed her partner backwards until they hit the exterior of the penthouse and she pressed her there. Helga let out a humored gasp, her breath, saturated with alcohol and something fruity. Rhonda brought her nose closer. "Is that Sheena's vegan ambrosia salad?."
"Yep. You want a taste?"
She paused but she did not let her hesitation reflect in her determined features. They hadn't kissed since that time when they were thirteen. Sex was cool, but she often found herself fantasizing more. Kissing was special; she felt it had more substance. And even though she had kissed her whatever-boyfriend 'Blake' in the past, she always wanted it to be Helga's lips that she was sampling.
Was that...weird? God, why was she thinking so much right now when this golden jewel was right in front of her, wanting more?
The Queen gritted her teeth and exhaled a warm breath before pressing her mouth to the Luchador's; she lost all inhibitions and her mind stopped. All she could focus on were the tender flavors of her friend's vermillion colored skin as she drew in each passionate motion and lick.
Helga's fingers went to the hostess's hair and tangled within Rhonda's smooth jet-black locks. The crown shuffled on her head as she muttered in-between the heated gestures of their burning desires. "Mmm, your lips taste so good; your mouth tastes so good; you taste so good..."
"Mmm...shaddup."
Continuing their zealous oral motions, the wealthy teenager reached down and grabbed her companion's thigh, bringing it up, wrapping it around the side of her hip, pushing the blonde firmer against the wall.
Several lustful moments later, Helga finally pulled her mouth away and mumbled, "L-Let's go to your room."
Rhonda revealed a gratified smile and let go of her thigh, only to take her guest's hand and they swiftly moved back in, through the teenagers of the crowded penthouse, eventually reaching a hallway and hostess's bedroom.
As Helga stumbled over to the queen-sized bed, Rhonda opened the compartment of a nearby dresser to find a 'Do Not Disturb' knob-hanger she had for such occasions and placed it onto the door, quietly closing it while she watched the blonde fumble out of her pants and gawkily unbind her chest. She flopped onto the bed and chuckled into the satin sheets. "I m-may need some help."
The dark haired girl strolled over and pushed aside the sheets of her made bed, helping Helga lie back on the mattress. She wiggled and eventually her head found the pillow of the right side. Rhonda repressed a giggle as Helga forgot to take off the luchador mask or her glasses atop her head. Her guest mumbled as her eyelids became heavier. "I want you to t-touch me and...k-kiss me..."
Rhonda stared into Helga's half lidded eyes, glazed over with heavy intoxication. A twinge erupted in her stomach. As much as she wanted to continue this...ride of rousing feelings, she couldn't with her friend's current state. It wouldn't be right. And she cared for Helga much more than her own selfish satisfactions.
The hostess bit her bottom lip and sighed, grabbing the sheets and tucking the blonde's practically naked form into the bed. She pulled off her partner's glasses, folding them and placing them on the nearby nightstand. "Okay, Precious. I'm going go to the bathroom and rip off this silly gown, and come out looking so sexy for you. You just wait here, okay? Don't go anywhere."
Helga sleepily grinned and slowly gave a thumbs up. "C-Cool beans."
Rhonda smiled faintly as she walked over to her bathroom and closed the door, setting down her crown onto the counter. She closed her eyes tightly, still dealing with the pain from that incessant headache.
She turned on the faucet and splashed cold water onto her face. Attempting to not smear her makeup as she dabbed her cheeks with one of the bathroom towels. She then grabbed a nearby glass for gargling and filled it up with water; took some aspirin from the medicine cabinet and placed it into her mouth. She drank the cool liquid and swallowed the medicine, placing the crown back atop her head and left the bathroom, setting the glass of water and aspirin by the nightstand where Helga now slept.
Rhonda smiled at her companion's subtle snores. She was hoping the blonde would fall asleep. Away from Iggy, away from...well, everyone else. She licked her lips, gathering what taste of Helga she had left, and sat on the bed, gently moving a hand behind her flaxen colored head, unraveling the velcro that bound the mask to her friend's face.
She removed the scarlet veil and set it aside next to the bi-focals. Gazing into Helga's slumbering features. Something she felt like she could do forever.
Shit, she was a sap. It was a damn good thing she was so great at hiding it.
The hostess silently took off her shimmering crown, resting it above her partner's head on the large pillow. "This suits you much better…" she whispered cordially as she then got up and left the room, closing the door behind her. Reluctantly trudging back into the area of the party.
How she would love to just pass out next to Helga right now. Maybe sneak in a cuddle since the lanky teenager was so drunk she wouldn't have even noticed. But she had an affair to tend to, and she had to make sure everyone got the fuck out in a couple hours. Cleanup was shitty, but Curly always helped out with that part. And speaking of the young man himself...
The dark haired boy poked his head up from a gathering of classmates by the living room sofa and called over. "Hey, Rhonnie! Arnold took off all of his clothes and fell asleep on the couch holding a chia pet! We're all doing shots off of his butt crack! You want to do one?"
She laughed pleasantly. "Hell yes! Pour me a double, dahling." She responded as she skipped over and moved through the crowd.
Curly grabbed the handle of liquor on the coffee table and poured a tall shot of tequila, lightly squeezing it between Arnold's fuzzy butt as the footballhead snored between the cheers of teenagers crowded around his naked form.
"Thank you, love." She said as she knelt down onto her knees and placed her arms behind her back.
She bent forward and licked the scattered salt off one of his ass cheeks, placed her mouth around the rim of the glass, lifted her head back and gulped down the liquid. The group around her applauded again as she handed over the shot glass to her friend and grabbed one of the football-shaped limes upon Arnold's spine, placing it into her mouth. She then groggily stood up; the painkiller and alcohol coursing its way through her body.
Rhonda pushed her way towards the kitchen, her stomach rumbling from the lack of food. And speaking of food, she spotted and tapped her finger against the shoulder of a taller girl amongst the exuberant guests in her living room. A very sober Sheena was casually conversing with a very drunk Ruth McDougall. Rhonda shouted over the music. "Great salad, by the way!"
Sheena's face lit up happily and she nodded as Rhonda ventured back towards her destination. Everyone was having a great time as usual, and here she was, still thinking too much. Still not drunk enough. She really needed to stop that.
Harold's unconscious torso lied on the kitchen island as the barstool barely supported his lower half. He had a bag of Cheesy Poofs in one hand and a half-smoked joint in the other. Rhonda happily grabbed the roach and put it into her mouth, finding a lighter nearby on the cluttered island and lit what marijuana was left in the rolled papers. She drew in a large inhale and breathed out a sigh of relief when she started to dig into the bag of junk food. Pondering back to Helga's scrumptious body, just waiting for her to sleep next to later. Until Iggy caught up with her.
"Yo, Rhonda. Where'd Helga go?"
She resisted the urge to immediately snarl. He was like a pestering gnat. "Hmm, pretty sure she left." She responded with an uninterested tone.
"She left? How? She was plastered!" He exclaimed in the loud kitchen. The music blasting from the living room didn't help much either.
The wealthy hostess inhaled the joint again and held the smoke in her lungs as she talked. "She took a cab. So, unfortunately she won't be joining you tonight." She blew out the tantalizing flumes. "Maybe she didn't wanna' fuck a dude in bunny pajamas." She ended rather coarsely and took a bite of cheesy poof as he glared at her. "Did that thought ever cross your mind?" She scowled back and it was a stare off.
Realizing that he was going to get nowhere with this argument, the boy let out a defeated grumble and stomped away. "Whatever."
Rhonda smirked haughtily to herself as Curly made his way through the drunken teenagers and to her side. He was wearing a shining king's outfit with high heels, golden eyeshadow, and a brilliant scepter.
She glanced over at him. "Damn, I keep saying this, but you were right. You look amazing in those heels and that glitter."
He gave a joyous twirl. "I know, right!? And thank you so much for letting me borrow them. By the way, where's your main squeeze? I'm sure she'd just LOVE to see Arnold like that out there."
"She's in my room, sound asleep." She pointed at her friend with a lowered tone. "If anyone even THINKS about going in there, you stop them, and they answer to me."
He took off his crown and bowed respectfully. "As you wish, my queen."
"Well, well, well, Rhonda Wellington Lloyd." A voice greeted mockingly as it entered the space of the kitchen.
The dark haired girl immediately turned, and when she saw his punchable face, his crooked nose, her fading headache ruptured into an inferno of irritation; the sharp pain surging into anger. She blurted out without another thought. "Oh. My. God. You have got to be shitting me." She responded in disgust and called out angrily. "Who let the TRASH in!?"
"Your baby dyke isn't here to protect you now." Luke said as he walked up to the hostess with his arms crossed and two older boys next to him. His moronic minions.
Curly twirled his scepter as he intruded in on the confronting conversation. "Oh, well honey, she's got the next best thing! A faggot."
Rhonda scoffed, her temper rising even further, like she was about to explode with the surge of adrenaline. THIS WAS HER HOUSE, GODDAMIT! THIS WAS HER PARTY! THE FU-CKING AUDACITY! "Are you ugly AND stupid? What were you planning to do, Luke? Come to my home and kick my ass in front of all these people? Or roofie me and take me out to your truck? Were you really going teach me a lesson? Is that the best you dopes thought up in your pea brains!?" She shouted, enough for everyone in the kitchen to stop what they were doing and stare. It even woke Harold up as he woozily lifted his head from the island.
She continued before he could respond. "Or are you still trying to get that dance?" She took an inhale of the roach. "You know, I'm getting real sick and tired of your homophobia, and your bruised fuckin' ego." She furiously flicked the lit joint at him and he flinched as it grazed his arm and fell to the floor. "You want to really walk into the lion's den, huh? With your little groupies?"
Curly grinned devilishly. His wild eyes sparkling as he crept up beside his queen. "I'll dance with him." He said jabbing Luke in the thigh with his scepter.
Rhonda snorted loudly, the glares of her guests at the ill-favored teenager edging her on like fuel to the flames. "I'm going to end this before it even starts, because you're just a sheep!"
He replied weakly. "Yeah, well…" He mumbled, now nervous and peered around at all the classmates who obviously didn't want him there either. "You're a...you're a p-pompous bitch!"
"You forgot crazy." She glanced over and grabbed an almost empty beer bottle from the cluttered island, bringing it to her lips to consume the rest of the fizzy drops. She then lifted up her arm and smashed the container against the edge of the butcher's block; the bottle shattered as shards sprinkled onto the ground. The hostess pointed the broken glass in his direction as she held the neck. "Oh, would you look at that? I'm all out of fucks to give."
The lackeys became anxious as their confident demeanor faded quickly. "Dude, this was a bad idea."
"I told you we shouldn't have come here!"
Rhonda took a step forward, holding her improvised weapon firmly. "Luke, I'm going to end this conflict once and for all. You come near me again. You come near my friends again. Expecting some sort of apology. Expecting anything, anything at all. You'll regret it."
It was then that the voice of reason entered the room. Well, if reason was horribly befuddled and buck-naked. "Can someone walk me to the bus stop? I don't feel so good." Arnold muttered, rubbing his eyes like a lost child.
Luke grimaced in defeat; his plan of...whatever it was that he planned, had failed. "Come on, let's get out of here." He said to his two stooges and they headed towards the exit of the kitchen, bumping the confused footballhead on the way out.
Rhonda and Curly walked up to the lost young man and the dark haired girl crossed her arms. She usually made it very evident that all indulging guests at her parties should have a chaperone in-case situations like this were to occur. "Where's Gerald?"
Arnold's bloodshot eyes winced at the fluorescents from the kitchen ceiling. "I don't know, I can't find him."
"Where are your clothes?" She asked again as the fabulous king shook his head. Speculating the blond's bare form now in full view.
"I'm pretty sure I saw him toss his costume over the balcony a while earlier."
Rhonda rolled her eyes and scoffed. "And you didn't stop him?"
"No, it was highly entertaining."
She irritably glared down at her friend.
"What? Oh, darling, don't give me that look! Why don't let him borrow some clothes? I can search the wasteland of your penthouse for his suitor!"
The wealthy teenager sighed loudly and grabbed Arnold's wrist, leading them out of the kitchen and into the congregation of drunken classmates. "I am so tired of babysitting children that are not mine! I swear, I am not having another party for a long time. Maybe not even until next summer!"
He called out before the two were completely lost in the crowd. "While you help Mr Silly Willy, I'll make sure the 'sheeps' let the door hit them on the way out!"
Rhonda crossly pushed the physical noodles of people out of her way, eventually making it to her room and roughly closing the door behind her.
The footballhead rubbed his butt, his eyes happily adjusting to the darkness of the space. "I t-think someone grabbed my booty...and w-why is it so salty?"
She brought his naked body over to the mattress and sat him down, holding out a finger as if to scold a toddler. "Don't move a muscle, I'm just going to go to my closet."
He grinned as his fingers felt the smooth fabric of the satin sheets. "Mmm, such a warm comfy bed." He mumbled, his half lidded eyes becoming droopier.
"Hey." She said snapping her fingers, surprised Helga was still sleeping through all of this. "No, no, no, don't even think about lying down. You need to stay awake."
The young man whined. "But the couch was horrible to sleep on…"
"You know what would be best to sleep on? Your own damn bed." She snarled; obviously care-giving was not an expertise that was bestowed upon her. Well, not at least for Arnold.
He continued running his hands over the sheets until they reached a lump under the covers. He turned his oblong shaped head to the slumbering form and squinted. "Is that Helga...why does she get to sleep in your bed?"
"Because she's...it's none of your business." Rhonda said rather embarrassed, and even though she had the shadows to veil her features, she managed not to blush a single bit.
He moved his head in closer to get a better look at the unconscious blonde. "Is she naked?" He asked as he curiously took the top of the layers of satin and began pulling it back.
"Hey!" The hostess whispered harshly and immediately pulled his ear. She continued darkly. "You try that again, and I'll be yanking your dick next time, and not in a good way."
"I was just…" He rubbed his ear after she released her grip. "Oww...why is she naked…?"
Miss Lloyd grumbled to herself as Arnold should've been asking himself that same question. "If I tell you, will you stop asking questions?"
He nodded and continued to massage his hurting lobe.
"Its because…" She hesitated, tapping her foot impatiently, not like she had to explain herself to him of all people, but if it would shut him up. Her brows rose as she thought up a plan and held out two fingers in front of his face. "Arnold how many fingers am I holding up?"
"Seven…"
She let out a sigh of relief. "Good, you won't remember this. Helga's naked and sleeping in my bed because...she's safe there. And I'll do anything to protect her and keep her safe. Because I...I…."
He closed his eyes in a slow blink, and a couple seconds later he groggily opened them again. "B-because you what?
She exhaled rather heavily. Not thinking she would ever confess this, not to her lover's past beau at least. "I love her, Arnold."
A wide grin broke out onto his simplistic emotions. "Aww, That's really sweet, you're a good friend."
"Right, friend."
"She's lucky…" He responded as he turned to Helga's form again and gradually held out his arm, lightly patting the blonde on the head. "Shhhhh."
Rhonda spotted the shimmery crimson pants that resided on the floor by her bed and grabbed them, tossing them into Arnold's lap before she walked towards her closet. "Put, these on. I'm going to find you a shirt."
She strolled over to the expansive closet, gazing at her expensive attire. There HAD to be something she was was willing to give away! She shuffled through the clothes until she found a tattered old shirt that belonged to Curly. Leaving it at a sleepover at some point in time, she assumed it wasn't that important if he hadn't remembered to pick it up. She pulled the Wankyland tee off the hangar and walked out of her closet, rather shocked at the sight she witnessed when she returned to her bed.
The young man had cuddled up in a fetal position with the pants as he snuggled up to Helga's back for warmth.
The wealthy hostess stared at them for a moment; her heart leapt into her throat as as the blonde girl returned the gesture and wiggled closer to the other figure lying on the mattress. However, the words that left her mouth during what Rhonda could assume was a pleasant dream, left her weak in the knees.
Helga muttered, "Rhon…"
Miss Lloyd grinned to herself sheepishly and wrung the t-shirt in her hands as she walked over and took the footballhead by the arm, lifting his dead weight up off the bed. She supposed all those hand-stands she did with her mother during yoga had paid off somehow. "Arnold, I told you not to fall asleep."
The young man snorted as he awoke. "I wasn't...I was just resting my eyes…"
"Put on the pants." She commanded as he slowly bent over to stick his legs into the fabric. She then wrapped the shirt over his head, and with some uncomfortable tugging, finally got his weird shaped cranium through the neck line.
"Oww…" he grimaced as he barely held onto the elastic waistline of the leggings. "I'm...I'm trying to put on the shirt…"
"They're pants, Arnold." She corrected as she grabbed the shimmery cloth and pulled them up to his hips. Then grabbed his waist and led him back to the door.
When she opened the entryway to her love dungeon, she noticed her kooky companion along with a rather worried taller boy.
"I found Gerald!" Curly responded, elated he could help his mistress, but then gawked at Arnold's attire.
"Where the hell were you for the past hour?" She asked angrily at the darker skinned young man. He better have had a good excuse. Actually, she didn't care.
"I was just-"
"Save it. While you were off chasing some tail, doofus here was practically choking on his own drool." She exclaimed as she shoved Arnold forward and he landed into Gerald's arms.
The footballhead muttered, his eyes wincing again at the lights in the hallway. "I wasn't drooling that much…"
Rhonda scoldingly pointed to her long time classmate. "Get him home safe. And now."
Gerald just blushed and nodded as he supported his intoxicated friend and led them out of the hallway.
Curly placed his hands onto his hips as he watched the two walk away. "I was wondering where that Wankyland shirt went!"
The dark haired girl moved her fingers to the bridge of her nose and massaged it. "Listen, I am tired. I am cranky. And I have a headache. You get everyone out of here by two am, and then come get me. I'm going to lay down."
He sighed despairingly, upset she wasn't usually having the time of her life, but nodded. His hands dropped as he took his scepter, resting against the wall. "Of course, love."
She gave a pathetic smile and leaned forward, pecking him gently on the cheek. "Thank you."
With that, she closed the door to all the loud noises and chattering, and pressed her palms into her face as she walked over to the bed, attempting to apply tension to the pain that bounced around in her mind. When she dropped her hands, she glanced at her crown, glistening on the pillow above Helga's head. She grinned slightly as she yanked off the large whisk collar and tossed it to the ground, lying down on the mattress next to her partner and wrapped her arm over the blonde's waist, pulling her companion close.
God, she wanted to smash her head through glass, only to let the blood pull the agony out of her brain as it would drip below her. But as of right now, her head only collided with the other pillow of her bed, and the scent of her partner's strawberry scented shampoo calmed her senses.
Helga snuggled into the comforting touch and warmth of the hostess's body. Her lips smacked as she lightly roused from sleep. "What took you so long…?" She mumbled.
Rhonda felt her heart melt into the emotional puddle of her insides as she pressed her forehead against the back of her friend's nape. She felt tears rush behind her tired eyeballs, and she supposed she would have to bleed another day. The something more...creeping its way into her veins.
~2003~
It was already dark as they slowly drove down a familiar street, just a block or two away from the Pataki residence. The older couple stopped the vehicle by the curb and the girls excitedly hopped out.
"Thanks, Mr and Mrs Clark. Without you two showing up we probably would've been attacked and eaten alive by rabid rats." Helga teased as she playfully nudged Rhonda.
The dark haired girl shut the back door and held up her hand in a kind departure. "Have fun visiting your Grandson."
"Oh, we will! You girls take care!" Mrs Clark responded happily and the couple drove away, into the flickering lights of the dim avenue.
Helga turned to Rhonda and gestured towards the direction of her house. "Shall we?"
She smiled as they began to walk again. The car ride was a nice break on their worn heels. "I know I've already said it, but, sorry again...for today. Trust me, it...panned out way better in my head."
The blonde chuckled, holding her thumbs on the belt loops of her jeans. "I can imagine that….by the way, you never told me how you blew up the car."
"Right." She let out a humored breath and anxiously rubbed her forearm. "I put fireworks in the fill hose. Provided by Li-Li."
"Of course he would agree to that." Helga lightly shook her head and gazed into the night sky. "You're kind of a nut-job, Lloyd."
"Yeah...I suppose it's just more prominent when I'm around you."
The lanky teenager glanced over and blushed, discreetly moving over her right hand to interlace her companion's fingers with hers.
Rhonda peered down at the tender feeling that left her skin tingling. "You're holding my hand?" She questioned but smiled nonetheless.
"Yeah, Rhon', it's what normal people do."
"It feels nice. I should've known your fingers were skilled in other areas."
Helga grinned and lifted up her free hand up to adjust her crooked glasses; staring at her beautiful yet crazy partner through the cracks. "You know, you're kind of cute when you're not plastered as fuck and passed out on the edge of a toilet seat."
"Well, you have to admit it's pretty adorable when I use a roll of toilet paper as a pillow."
The blonde rolled her eyes and confessed, not like she had any dignity that she hadn't already lost. "You know, as much as I bitch about my shitty life, I care about yours. I care about your happiness. I guess I just-...didn't realize how important my role was in it. You carry this essence like, everything is just so fine all the time. I had no idea I needed to tell you...that it was okay to not be fine...all the time."
Miss Lloyd inhaled a lungful of the dusky atmosphere. "When you're busy taking care of someone else and their problems, you tend to forget about your own. And it's nice. You don't have to constantly deal with your own shit all the time. But I get what you mean, and I appreciate it." She glanced up at the twinkling stars, very subtle from the city lights, which were romantic enough on their own. "I think it was me that was supposed to figure out that I don't need to be fine all the time. 'Tis the life of a Leo."
Helga nonchalantly glanced down at her shoes as she swayed their hands and asked timidly. "Well...how do you feel after today?"
Rhonda's facial features beamed at the thought. "Like a huge weight has been lifted off my chest. I've been wanting to say that to you for a while, and I'm at point where I don't even care who hears or sees. I'll scream it out, I LOVE HELGA PATAKI!" She raised her arms in the air, along with her friend's; her call echoing throughout the neighborhood.
"Shhh." Helga responded with a tiny chuckle.
"This is what you used to feel with Arnold? It's amazing. I feel so energized!" She exclaimed as she abruptly jumped atop a nearby bus seat, still not letting go of the blonde's grasp. "LISTEN UP, HILLWOOD! I'D MAKE LOVE TO HELGA PATAKI IN THE STREETS!" She shoved her unoccupied fist valiantly into the sky.
The lanky teenager rolled her sapphire eyes and lightly tugged onto her partner's arm, "Rhonda, people are sleeping. Besides, how are you so sure I'm in love with you?"
Miss Lloyd turned to stare back down at her companion, and hopped off the bench with ease, taking both of Helga's hands into her own. "This feels too good for you to not to."
The blonde felt a flurry of sheepishness creep into the faint veins of her cheeks as she gazed into those radiant brown irises.
"It's okay, you don't have to say it. I just want you to be...happy. And I know I'm obviously not good for you, but that's probably the only cool thing about...people parting from one another; is that they have the potential to be happier...maybe with someone else...maybe on their own..."
Helga harbored a sudden tightness in her throat, trailing down to her stomach. Almost making her sick. She understood what Rhonda was saying. It sounded like it came right out of Bliss' own mouth. Still, it was agonizing. She was happy, yet confused and it hurt. Happiness hurt.
"Please...just…can we not talk about my happiness right now? Can we just...walk and not talk for a while?"
The wealthy girl nodded as they continued on silently, their fingers still lingering together.
Isn't this what she wanted? To be friends without the benefits? Then why did the realization hit her so painfully now? Hours ago she wished she was here, just a block away from her home with Olga, now she didn't. Rhonda had finally shown her all the raw fleshy bits under those encrusted and hardened Lloyd emotions. Perfect timing. But maybe it was the time, the only time it would've happened. Maybe these saddened feelings were supposed to happen now. And maybe so was the happiness. Maybe happiness was the wrong word. Elated bravery seemed more like it.
"Shit, our calves are going to hurt tomorrow, huh? But think of how sexy they'll look in heels." Rhonda commented optimistically as they approached the stoop of the Pataki condo.
Helga stared down at their intertwined hands, and for some reason she couldn't let go. Even if they weren't good for each other, that logic didn't correlate with how she emotionally festered inside. Involuntarily, she began to cry; tears ran down through the ash and dirt on her cheeks and she wiped them with her free wrist.
"What's wrong?"
She started to blubber, and dared to turn her head away. Her lower lip curled. "God, why is this so hard?" Her usually bold tone cracking as nostalgic memories blundered through.
Miss Lloyd's eyes softened as she adoringly gazed into the face that wanted to hide from her. "We are... all we've known for the past six years...and it's scary to break that. But I think now…" She gently took blonde's other hand again. "I'm ready for it. I'm ready to not be fine. And I think you are too."
Helga sniffled and let out a dispirited chuckle; her blue eyes now puffy and pink, her voice wavering as her heart ripped apart at it's mismatched seams, stitched over and over again. "I can't believe you blew up a car just to tell me you love me."
"It was worth a eighty thousand dollars." She disclosed a smug yet cordial grin. "But you're worth so much more than that."
Heavier droplets spilled from those sapphire eyes and the lanky teenager shook her head. "Fuck, Rhon'." She muttered before wrapping her arms around Rhonda's torso, her fingers clinging into her friend's shoulder blades while she sobbed into her shoulder. She mumbled against the fabric. Perfume mixed with fire. "...I love you too…"
The dark haired girl felt water wrap over her own brown irises, and she returned the embrace. Having a response tucked away in her brain for nearly every situation, this was one she felt difficulty finding words for.
As if it was possible, Helga's tone became even more breathless as the agony from sadness mixed into her lungs. "I don't...I don't know if I'm strong enough…I don't want to become lost again..."
Rhonda pressed her palms into her friend's lower back, bringing the blonde closer; wanting to take away all of Helga's fear in that instant, kiss every inch of her face, pick her up into her arms and run away. Falling back into the black hole of numbing habits. But somehow she found the courage to resist; she had to let go, even if it meant plunging into that endless pit by herself, gazing at her lover's face from above, becoming smaller in the distance of the light.
She uttered the words to Helga, and secretly to herself. "You are strong." She sniffled. "You are, Precious. You have to believe that you are...I do." She pulled away in her companion's arms and looked down into the blonde's glistening eyes. "Now, pull your damn hands up and wipe away those silly tears."
Helga exhaled a humored snort and let go of Rhonda as she rubbed the streams from her cheeks, regaining a bit of her voice. "You know I'm still here for you...if you need it. I'm just a phone call away from...calling you out on your arrogant bullshit."
Miss Lloyd grinned wide at that and helped brush a couple tears off of her partner's chin with her thumb. "I'll keep that in mind."
The lanky teen sighed and reluctantly glanced back at the door up the stoop. "I guess I better go tell Olga I'm not dead...I'll...see you around?" She asked anxiously, her torn heart fluttering on it's last thread.
Rhonda simply nodded in response as Helga gradually turned, heading up the stairs towards the entrance of the blue bricked condo.
She gazed at her back, the gallant features of her spine and muscles; words escaping from her lips before the blonde entered the home and rested, or didn't rest, for the night. "Miss Pataki."
Helga paused and curiously altered her torso to face her longtime friend again.
The wealthy girl suddenly felt nervous, something that was incredibly rare for her. "You think in the future, when we're less fucked up...we could give us another go?"
She gave a small smile and bashfully shoved her hands into her jean pockets, surprised as she felt the crumpled sticky note from earlier that day. She pulled it out and looked at the piece of paper; poetic notions floating amongst her brain waves as she strolled back down the stoop and took Rhonda's hand, tenderly placing the note into it. "We'll see. As long as you don't blow up another damn car."
"No promises."
Helga curled her lover's fingers over the paper and brought her mouth to the side of Miss Lloyd's cheekbone, serenading the suppressed verses into her ear. "Remember, who you are, even in the dark, smoke hazed room. And when you're ready, diligently search in the opaque shadows for that door." She let her lips graze across Rhonda's cheek in a subtle peck before parting back to the home. "Goodnight, Princess."
The dark haired teenager stood there and waited until her friend entered the condo. She then stared down and opened her hand, unfolding the familiar sticky note.
Waiting for you outside!
She smiled to herself and glanced up at the light that turned on from Helga's bedroom window. "Goodnight...My queen."
XOXOX
She wandered down the streets by her lonesome, absently playing with the note that resided in the pocket of her thin hoodie. She couldn't wipe the grin off her face, and decided not to race home right away, trying to prolong the imminent punishments that awaited her.
Rhonda exhaled subtle swoons here and there as she reached her detour, a townhome much like the others in the neighborhood. She strolled down the walkway and reached the door; brushing her feet on the welcome mat as she rang the doorbell.
After a couple seconds, the sound of a lock was unlatched and the door opened, revealing Curly in his nightly robe and mud mask. His eyes widened and he gasped at her presence. "Oh. My. Goodness. You look incredible. Did it go as well as you planned?"
Miss Lloyd expressed a dazzling smile and quickly picked him up by the waist, twirling them both around as she could not contain her glee.
"YES!" He exclaimed and cupped her face into his manicured fingers. "Aww, I'm so happy for you!" She set him down back onto his feet and he responded with a wince.
Rhonda's smile immediately left as she noticed he staggered on his heels. "What happened?"
He rolled his eyes and adjusted. "The brute caught up with me after fourth period. Like he and his gaggle of neanderthals think it'll stop me from trying out on Friday, but don't worry about it. Sweetie, I want to hear about your glorious day!" Curly swiftly took her hands with his as he pulled her into the house. Her ecstatic grin returning.
XOXOX
Helga, remember when I said I only stared at myself? I lied. You'll never go out of style in my eyes.