Chapter 10

"Well it looks like congratulations are in order, Mrs. Grey," he says looking up at us. "You're pregnant." Christian drops my hand like it's on fire.

Wait, what? I think sluggishly. Pregnant? My stomach drops into my knees and I'm suddenly nauseous. This doctor has got to be wrong. "I can't be pregnant," I say urgently. "I'm on the shot. I've never missed a dose!" Oh my god, this can't be happening. I look desperately at Christian, but he refuses to make eye contact.

"Your shot may very well have failed," Dr. Martinez says sympathetically, setting down the folder. He leans against the counter and folds his arms. "Nothing is fool proof. But you are pregnant, Mrs. Grey."

No. No. No. No. Fuck. This can't be happening… I struggle to take a deep breath and bury my face in my hands. This is happening to soon. Way too soon. I'm not ready to have a baby. We're not ready.

"I thought this was a reliable form of birth control," I hear Christian ground out. I flinch. He's pissed. Fuck! I'm at the verge of tears now. It's too soon. It's too soon.

"I'm afraid birth control isn't something I specialize in," the Doctor admits, immune to the anger in Christian's voice. I distantly wish I was. "But the Depo shot is supposed to be effective. You're sure you haven't missed your Depo shot, Mrs. Grey?"

I nod quickly. "I had one before- before we left on the honeymoon, and the other one while I was in the hospital. I swear."

"Well," he says, changing the subject. "In light of this, you'll have to stop taking the pain meds I prescribed you. I'll write you another one for something that you can take. And you'll want to get in to see your Gynecologist as soon as possible. She'll be able to do an ultrasound to figure out how far along you are."

I'm given prescriptions for new pain medicine and prenatal vitamins and before I know it we're leaving. I follow Christian out in a daze. Christian stomps towards the black SUV with his hands in fists at his sides. I'm pregnant. I glance down at my flat stomach. A baby. I still can't believe it. The timing is terrible for sure, but, a baby. Christian's baby. Growing inside me.

When we get to the car, Christian yanks the door open for me. I'm sure it's out of habit, because the look on his face doesn't match the politeness of the gesture. Not one bit. "Christian," I say weakly. "Please-"

"Get in the car, Anastasia," he interrupts coldly. I stand there gawking at him. Through everything we've been through, I've never heard him sound that cold towards me. "Get in the fucking car," he repeats, his voice dropping into a lower register.

I bite my lip and get in, and flinch when he slams the door closed. Sawyer looks at me worriedly through the rear view mirror, but doesn't say anything. Christian hauls himself into the SUV, straps in and slams his door shut too.

Once were moving, Christian tears into me. "I can't fucking believe this! How could you let this happen?"

How could I let this happen? "I didn't do anything," I whisper, fighting back tears. "I didn't miss my shot Christian, it just happened."

"Just happened? Babies don't fucking just happen, Ana!" he snaps and I grimace. He's a lot madder than I thought he'd be. "I'm not ready to be a father."

That's what this is about, I think. "I think you'll be a wonderful father," I say slowly.

"How do you know that!?"

I stare at my knees. "I know you're upset. I know the timing isn't right and neither of us is ready for this, but we'll figure it out."

He slams his fist into the empty seat between us. "We've known each other for five fucking minutes!" He yells. "I wanted to show you the world, Ana. I'm not ready to share you. And now it's going to be diapers, and vomit and shit! Fuck!" He shoves his fist through his hair in an effort to calm down, but it doesn't seem to be working.

"Please don't yell at me, Christian," I mumble through tears, still looking at my knees.

"Jesus H. Christ, here we go with the fucking waterworks," he says hurtfully. "See? This is why I like control. So shit like this doesn't happen and fuck everything to hell. Fuck…" I notice we've stopped at a red light. His voice drops down to a harsh, bitter whisper. "Is it even mine?"

I gasp and stare at him in shock at the implication behind his comment. He seems to realize what he just said as well because the anger on his face fades into horror. "Fuck, Ana," he says quickly and reaches his hand out to touch me. "I'm sorry-"

I swat his hand away from me and sob. "Really Christian?" I bite back, hurt beyond belief. "You're going to say that to me?"

"Ana," he says desperately.

"No! If you want to know what happened so much, then fine," I shout through a veil of tears and wave my two fingers in front of his face. "He slid his hands up my thighs and put his fingers in me." Christian's face pales considerably. "All while telling me how you'd kill yourself if something happened to me! Are you happy now? Does that make you feel better?"

"Ana," he chokes out and reaches out to me again.

I swat his hand away again. I can't deal with this. "Go fuck yourself, Christian," I mutter and before anyone can stop me, I open the door and climb out into the rain. I can hear Christian yelling for me, before I slam the door shut. I jog quickly across the crosswalk and down the next street. I wipe the biting rain off my face.

I can't believe he just said that. But then again I can. Whenever he's upset, whenever something doesn't go the way he wants it to, he turns into a petulant adolescent. I hazard a glance back and I see Sawyer jumping out of the car right as the light turns green and Taylor is left with no other option but to go with traffic. Thankfully, he's stuck on the other side of the busy street. With the SUV gone out of sight, I stop at the curb and call a cab.

"Where to?" The cabbie asks me disinterestedly and I give him the first address I can think of. He eases back into traffic. In the passenger side mirror I can see Sawyer chasing after me frantically.

IIIIIIIIIIIII

I knock on the door outside Kate's apartment. Please let her be home from work, I think desperately. I glance around me worriedly, suddenly wishing I didn't leave Sawyer behind. Hyde could be anywhere. Quickly, I knock on the door again.

"Yeah, yeah, I head you the first time," Kate says, unlocking the door. She takes one look at me and asks, "what did he do to you?" From my puffy red eyes, and soaking wet clothes it must be obvious.

"I'm pregnant," I whisper, sniffling.

Her eyes widen. "Oh no, Ana, come here!" She says, pulling me into a hug and dragging me into the apartment. The flood gates open up, and I start crying again. She leads me into the living room where Elliot and Ethan are sitting watching a football game. They look up at me surprised. Shit! I think. I didn't count on them being here.

"Whoa, what's wrong?" Elliot asks worriedly. Both of them stand up and start making their way towards us.

"You're god dammed brother," Kate says fiercely. "That's what's wrong."

Once again I'm thankful for the tenacious side Katherine Kavanagh, because not only does she kick Elliot out in record time, but she sends Ethan out for Chinese food. My stomach grumbles at the mention of food, but she tugs me into her bedroom and gives me her pair of flannel bunny rabbit pajamas to change into. I pull off my soggy clothes and change into them slowly, all of my previous adrenaline gone and replaced by exhaustion. A small part of me feels guilty. Christian is probably freaking out about where I am; I left my phone in the SUV. My subconscious scowl's. It's the least he deserves, she says angrily. He'll figure it out eventually.

Kate is back in the living room waiting for me on the couch. I walk over and sit down tiredly, curling myself up into a ball. "Tell me what happened. From the beginning," she says.

I didn't come here with the intention of talking to Kate; I just wanted to be somewhere away from Christian - not forever, but just for the night, maybe longer. Not for the first time since I jumped out of the car, I rub my flat stomach. It's just for now, baby… I hope. But I find myself spilling my guts to her anyway. She listens silently the entire time, scowling.

"That fucker!" she says angrily when I'm finished. "He said that to you?" I bury my head in my hands and nod. "I get the whole 'I don't want to be a father' bitch fit, but- Ugh... Thundercunt!" I let out a sob. Why is this happening so soon?

Kate stops her rant, and pulls me into another hug. "Oh Ana, it's going to be okay," she says unconvincingly and pats my back. "It's a baby, not some life threatening disease."

"But what about my marriage?" I cry.

She rolls her eyes. "Grey wouldn't leave you if you turned into IT the clown," she sighs, rocking me back and forth. "He worships the ground you walk on. He'll get over it eventually. You're not the first couple who's had an unwanted pregnancy, you know."

I shake my head. "No," I mumble. "Not unwanted, just… unexpected."

"Unexpected," she agrees.

The door rattles for a moment, and Ethan comes through holding a white plastic bag. He closes it quickly behind him. "Uh," he says awkwardly setting the bag down on the counter. "I think Christian's on his way up."

"Nope!" Kate says loudly. "I don't think so. Don't even think about letting him in here, Ethan!" She snaps, back on her rant and stomps into her bedroom.

She comes back brandishing a baseball bat, right as someone pounds on the door. I groan and sink into the couch. All I want is somewhere quiet, so I can figure things out. Ethan rolls his eyes as she marches to the door. "Don't worry, Ana-banana," Ethan tries to joke and leans against the back of the couch. "Whatever it is, she'll put him back in his place." I don't say anything – he obviously doesn't know Christian very well.

"What do you want, Grey?" Kate asks, much more civil than I thought she'd be.

I can't see Christian from here, but I can hear his voice and it makes my stomach knot up painfully. "Is she here?" he asks her desperately. "Is Ana here?"

"Yes," Kate replies coldly. "What's it to you?"

He makes a move to come in, and Kate lifts up the baseball bat and pokes him in the chest. "Let me in, Kavanagh," he growls.

"After what you did today?" she snaps back. "I'd rather be eaten by a gang of cannibals."

"That can be arranged," he argues back. "Now let me the fuck in. She's my wife."

"I'm not your wife, Christian," I mutter tiredly from my spot. "I'm the pregnant woman you took your frustration out on today."

"Fuck! Ana," he calls out, and makes another attempt to get through the door.

"Please go away, Christian."

"Are you leaving me?" He chokes out, terrified. I pause. Am I? I look down at my stomach. No, I decide. Not unless I have to.

I get up and walk to the door so I can see him. He looks like an emotional wreck. I move so were face to face. "I should," I say bitterly. "I really should. What you said- Christian, that hurt. More than anything, that hurt. How could you be so cruel?" He doesn't say anything, just stares at my feet, expecting the worst. "But no. I'm not going anywhere. I told you I wasn't. But if you think I'm going home with you right now, you're crazy." My subconscious gives me a high five. Good job, she tells me. Stand up to him. "Go. I'll call Sawyer if I decide to come home." I close the door in his face before I can change my mind.

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