AN: This is the second chapter I've posted today so if you haven't read chapter nine make sure you use that awesome previous button and check it out. Go on...go...
One Month Ago
"I feel like we're playing hooky. Do you know how long it's been since I've taken a day off?" Tris asks.
"Probably as long as it's been since I have." I reply with a smile.
"I had so much fun today Eric. Thank you." She says as she rubs her thumb over the back of our entwined hands.
"I'm glad, you needed a fun day with everything you've been dealing with. I had fun too." I reply.
We had no destination in mind when we left this morning, instead just driving out of the city so we could enjoy each other without worrying about running into anyone we know. We ended up finding a street festival, and we spent the entire day riding rides, eating deep fried food and playing games. This day has reminded us both of our many trips to Navy Pier as kids and we've thoroughly enjoyed being able to show affection out in the open without worrying about the consequences. For the first time since all of this between us started, I could hold her hand in public. We could kiss like the happy young couple we are.
I pull her to a stop before we reach the car and I lean down and kiss her. The slight breeze that's blowing pushes strands of her long blonde hair towards me and I slip my hands into the back pockets of her jeans and pull her flush against my body. I feel free.
"Say you'll be mine Tris." I whisper against her lips.
"I've always been yours." She whispers back before claiming my lips with her own.
We've had a lot more time together since Peter gave up on trying to be a decent boyfriend and went back to his womanizing ways. I've managed to go out with him enough to keep him happy, and to not make him suspicious when I duck out without warning. Ever since that night in her office, Tris and I have become much more intimate both physically and emotionally. I was so worried that she would shut me out like she did after Peter's arrest, but she didn't and if anything she became much more comfortable with showing me affection and telling me she loves me. We've spent a lot of time together at my apartment, where behind those doors we are able to love each other without restrictions.
It almost feels like we're in a relationship. I know Peter is still there, I know that the wedding is still being planned and I know that she's still terrified of what he'll do if she doesn't cooperate with him but sometimes when it's just the two of us it feels so real. I still worry about how I'm going to get her to break free from Peter. I can't operate with my head in the sand and as much as I'm trying to live in the right now it's still in the back of my mind.
The thing that terrifies me the most is that I've given this woman the ultimate power over me with how deeply I love her. She has the power to break me.
"What are you thinking about?" She asks me.
"The future." I answer her honestly.
"What about it?" She asks and I can clearly hear the hesitation in her voice.
"Nothing, let's just focus on the right now, ok?" I ask.
She doesn't say anything else for a long time but I feel her tracing her fingers across our entwined hands and up my exposed arm.
"I'm not being fair to you." She says suddenly.
"Tris, let's not do this." I reply.
"We have to do this Eric. I know you keep saying you want to live in the right now but the reality of our situation is that I'm stuck with him. We've not found any way out of this that doesn't potentially get my family or me hurt or me thrown into jail. How is this fair to you? You want to continue to be my dirty little secret when you could go out and find someone else who's actually able to be seen in public with you? Or who can love you without restrictions?" She stops speaking and when I look over at her I can see the tears she's failing to fight.
"This is exactly why I didn't want to talk about this." I reply. I take the next exit and find a small park right off the road. We park the car and head over to the empty swing set, taking a seat on swings next to each other.
"We can't keep avoiding the conversation just because it's hard. We have to talk about it. I'm getting married next month Eric." She says.
"Does that make you stop loving me Tris? Because it sure as hell isn't going to make me stop loving you." I retort.
"Of course it won't. Do you think I would say those words to you if I didn't mean them? Do you know I'm getting fucking married to him and I've never said those words to him? Not once Eric." She replies angrily.
"We can leave Tris. We can go to California, my boss would have no issue transferring me back and you're an amazing paralegal who would get work quickly. Or, better yet we could get you into law school." I reply.
"Right, and as soon as I'm gone he goes to the police Eric. Or he looks for my brothers. Or he realizes I left with you and he goes after you. He's unstable, and I think he's capable of anything." She replies.
"We change our names. It's that simple. We become new people." I argue.
"That doesn't protect my brothers Eric." She sighs. "I can't do this to you." She shakes her head.
"Don't start this conversation Tris. I refuse to let it happen. You are not breaking up with me." I argue. I get off of the swing and stand in front of her, yanking her swing towards me and wrapping her up in my arms. "You aren't breaking up with me. I love you and if this is what we have to do until he finally is satisfied then we keep doing it."
"I don't want to ruin your life Eric. You can do so much better than this. Than me." She replies.
"The only thing that would ruin my life would be you leaving me again. I can't do it, I won't be without you. I finally have you in my life, and even though it's not exactly where we want to be right now we will get there." I say I feel her arms wind around my torso and her relax into my chest.
"I love you." She says and I kiss the top of her head.
"I love you too. I never should have left. I shouldn't have moved to California and I should have grown a set and told you how I felt five years ago." I murmur and she shakes her head.
"Hindsight is twenty twenty." She replies.
"Tris, I need you to promise me you won't push me away again." I say quietly.
"I can't make that promise. I'm trying Eric, and there's no part of me that doesn't want this with you. I can't stand watching what it does to you. I'm doing this to you. Do you know how conflicted I am?"
"You have to let me be the one who decides what I can and can't take. I love you, and I will wait forever for you. There is no one else for me Tris."
"I don't want you to have to wait..." she replies but I press my lips to hers to keep her from saying more.
"It's my decision. If you ever end things with me it's going to be because you want to, not because you're making a decision for me. I know what I'm getting into Tris, I've known it this whole time and I don't give a fuck. I want you."
"But, he has to have a child to get his trust fund. He has to have an heir. I can't have sex with him, not while I'm with you, not ever." She replies.
"You don't have to." I reply.
"Eric..." She furrows her eyebrows in confusion.
"You stop taking your pills. We continue our relationship. You get pregnant, convince him you two had sex on one of the nights where he comes home completely shit faced and then a couple of weeks later you announce you're pregnant. He won't know he difference. I'll even get him drunk for you, it'll be so easy."
"You have seriously planned this out. You just literally spouted out a plan for you to get me pregnant and convince him it's his child without batting an eyelash. How? Why would you do this?" She asks.
"Because I love you, because we have a future together and because once he has his goddamn money you can prove the child isn't his and we walk out of his life for good. We raise our child, we have more children, we buy a house, we get married if that's what you want, we do it all."
Tris says nothing, instead she wraps her arms around my waist and looks into my eyes.
"Kiss me Eric."
I lean down and press my lips to hers. We melt into each other like every time before and for right now she's mine. She will always be mine.