The temporal stasis field wasn't really visible, but Len could feel it giving off what he'd come to recognise as time energy. He could sense its unique vibrations, like one would be able to sense heat or cold, and he found it didn't unsettle him as much as he thought it would when the former Time Master had warned him about it earlier.
He stared at Barry's lax face and was hit with a mix of feelings, the strongest of them being worry and guilt, although he couldn't pinpoint the reason for the latter. Iris and Sara had gone to have a talk with Mary Xavier, taking Mick with them and leaving Len alone with Master Rook.
"Are you sure this is gonna keep him safe?" Len turned to the older man as he spoke, searching his face for any hint of a lie. Because, after all, the last Time Masters he'd dealt with hadn't been the most truthful bunch and he'd never been a trusting person to begin with.
"It's the only solution we've got," Rook answered. "Our infirmary here at the Sanctuary isn't equipped to deal with something as severe as time poison." He threw Len a considering look. "How are you feeling, though? Is the dizziness gone?"
"I'm peachy," Len shrugged. "Literally. Ever since you've reset my frequency."
"I'm glad to hear that," Rook said.
"Something tells me you weren't expecting it to be that easy," said Len, trying not to frown. He was waiting for the other shoe to drop any second now.
"I'm just surprised, is all," Rook, rubbed his chin thoughtfully for a few moments. "Considering you've been trapped there for a lot longer than I was, your recovery has been rather swift, compared to mine. Spectacular even. I'm worried of any delayed after-effects, though."
Len did his best not to let what he was feeling show outwardly, keeping a lid on both relief and dread. The first at the apparent easy fix and the second at the prospect of future difficulties.
"Well," Len mumbled, "I'm still trying to wrap my head around the idea of missing two years of my life." He smiled a genuine smile, and resisted the urge to dwell on the easiness with which he did so. "Also, I'm trying not to look a gift horse in the mouth."
"If you put it that way…" Rook said. There was a lull in the conversation, during which both men turned to look at the prone speedster. "That particular hurdle notwithstanding," he went on, turning to peer at Len once more, an unreadable expression on his face, "your life will be different from now on. You will be different."
"I think I've begun to change long before even setting foot on the Waverider," Len said after a moment, not taking his eyes off Barry's unmoving body. "And this man right here started that transformation. He's the reason I joined this time-travelling crew. He saw something in me that no one else did, and his belief in my ability to be something more drove me to accept Rip's offer." He drew in a deep breath and swept a hand across his face. "By the time I held down the failsafe at the Oculus, I'd gone through a few more changes since joining Rip on this crazy endeavour."
Len paused then, something in Barry's hairline drawing his attention. Strangely, the hair above the speedster's right ear had started becoming flecked with grey. A strand, about two inches wide, had become completely white. Len knew it would never fade because, in the glimpses of the future he'd seen, Barry had had that streak in his otherwise auburn locks.
"I guess," Len went on, "that my time on the Oculus Waste helped me accept that I'm not the same man from before this all started, nor the one who stole a cold gun to keep the Flash on his toes. And that I'll never again be that man. Given what I've seen, I don't think I could return to being that person."
"Maybe it's that acceptance," Rook mused, "that gave you the ability to resist losing your sanity, which, in turn, made the transition back to this dimension easier to bear. And, from your friends' description of what transpired, the Oculus Entity seems to have accepted and even protected you. My experience wasn't as… pleasant and it took me a lot longer to readjust to normal life."
"Oh, I think I'll need some time to deal with this, regardless," Len turned to look at the other man and saw him in a different light.
Learning that he was speaking from personal experience, one they shared to a certain degree, made it easier for Len to trust the former Time Master.
"You are right about that," Rook said after a moment of silence. "The first thing you'll have to contend with, and probably the most noticeable, will be an altered perception of time."
"Altered how?" Len asked, eyebrows drawing together in a frown.
"Nothing too drastic," Rook hurriedly replied, apparently noticing the uneasiness in Len's stance. "You'll just be more aware of the passage of time when you are not in a place like the Sanctuary or the Vanishing Point, where there is none."
"I've always been pretty good at keeping track of time," Len said. "Guess that'll be one of my talents kicked into overdrive."
"You will also probably be able to sense temporal energy," Rook continued, "and I have a suspicion that that particular ability will be sharper in you than mine ever was." He paused shortly, as if for emphasis. "And last, but not least, you'll have the capacity to tell where and when you are in the timeline, if you've been dropped off somewhere without being told or by accident."
"Those sound like really nifty gifts, actually," Len said, not understanding the serious tone.
"And they are," the other man said. "I'm not saying you shouldn't embrace them. But you spent two years exposed to pure temporal energy, not to mention the amount you've been irradiated with when the Oculus exploded. So there's no telling what else you might be able to do. And you might not even be the only one walking away from this with alterations to the core."
Len swallowed hard at the thought of other – less savoury – 'abilities' interfering with him, or his friends, leading a relatively normal life. What he'd seen as a blessing could easily turn into a curse, if he didn't have full control over his body and – as outlandish as it sounded – his powers.
"That thing I was able to do when the Time Wraiths attacked," Len said, voice almost a whisper, "when I practically shot lightning from my hands… is that the kind of thing you mean?"
He turned his face back towards Barry's form, needing something else to focus on than the whirlwind of his thoughts and emotions. Len knew Rook understood what he meant. He remembered that Sara had recounted their actions to the older couple while Rook was working with the ship's AI to reset his frequency.
"Your scans indicate that that was a one-off," the other man replied. "I'm thinking of more subtle things, but there's no way of knowing with certainty what they'll be until they manifest." He sighed and Len turned to look at him, surprised to find a softness in his eyes. "I'm not telling you this to frighten you. I just want you to be prepared for anything, because we're in uncharted waters, despite my experience, or Mary's."
"Thank you," Len said.
He wanted to say more, but was at a loss for words, and was saved from having to wrack his brain for something – anything – by the sound of footsteps on the hall. Not long after, Mick came stomping in, his usual gruff self.
"We're ready to go, boss," his partner said, nodding at Rook after completing his sentence.
"If you ever need anything," said Rook, extending his hand to shake Len's, "be it help or simply advice, just drop by. We'll be there for you if you encounter any hurdles you can't overcome."
"I'll keep that in mind," said Len and accepted the offered handshake. "Thanks."
Rook repeated the gesture with Mick, who shook the man's hand curtly, but not unkindly, and then the three of them started towards the exit hatch. Before leaving the room, Len spared one last glance in Barry's direction, then scanned the vitals display on the wall by the medical chair. But nothing had changed – for better or worse. He just hoped that Gideon would be able to fix the damage quickly and spare Barry any more pain. And, that they were in a timeline where Barry would actually survive this ordeal, despite the fact that Len's senses seemed to indicate that they were. The best laid plans and all that…
Trying not to let his mind wander down the dark path of a possible future where the speedster didn't make it, Len left the room and jogged to catch up with the others. It was time to go home.
Around the Styx's holotable, Sara and Iris watched as Mick ran a diagnosis on the jumpship to find out just how much damage the smaller vessel had sustained. They'd left the medical room in order to give Will space to set up the stasis field that would keep Barry stable enough to survive the time jump. Only Leonard had stuck around, allegedly to help the older man in case there was a need for it. Although, Sara doubted that that was the only reason he'd hung back. There had been an undercurrent of urgency and a hint of anxiousness in Leonard's demeanour, a worry for Barry's wellbeing. The speedster had apparently become somewhat of a friend during their shared entrapment and, according to Gideon's files, they had started tolerating each other before Leonard joined the team.
But Sara was now acutely aware of the fact that the man they had recovered from the Oculus Waste was a very different person from the one who held down the failsafe at the Vanishing Point over two years prior. He seemed a lot more open in his interactions, for one. He was even more accepting of help when he needed it, whereas before, he would have insisted that he was fine, even if he'd have to crawl on all fours to make his point. And he no longer looked at the people around him as if they were just part of a crew and nothing else. He looked at them like he considered them friends. Real friends. Even Iris, whom he barely knew.
She'd begun noticing the changes, starting with that brief discussion they'd had on the Waste, when she'd explained the protection vests and their escape plan to him and he had, in turn, told her about what had been going on with Barry. The lines of his face were softer somehow, the colour of his eyes intense in a different way, less like ice, and his voice lacked that distinct drawl that had been his trademark throughout the time she'd known him.
Her musings were interrupted by the soft footfall echoing in the hallway leading to the bridge. A minute later, Mary entered the room and joined the two women by the holotable.
"How are you feeling, darling?" Mary inquired after a moment, putting a reassuring hand on Iris' arm and squeezing gently.
"A little shaken," Iris said and rubbed a hand across her face, "but relieved too, now that I know Barry's safe."
"And you, my dear?" Mary addressed Sara and manoeuvred to stand in between her and Iris.
"I'm still trying to wrap my head around the thought that…" Sara took in a deep, steadying breath, "that Leonard's alive. That he's been alive all this time…"
"You couldn't have known," Mary said. "Not even Michael was certain, even if he had his suspicions."
"But why didn't he say anything?" Sara burst out, angry at the situation all over again. "Why didn't Rip even give us a hint that this might be a possibility?"
"I think the reason he didn't mention it," Mary answered, "was because your friend's… circumstances were vastly different from Will's. I also believe that he didn't want to give you false hope, only for it to lead nowhere."
Sara considered that for a few moments. Would it have really helped her then, to be given that hope and then to have it snatched away? If things wouldn't have worked out, on top of her grief over Laurel's death, how would she have coped? Would she have been able to handle it? Probably not. The truth was that, with Rip gone, they would never know and it was certainly futile to dwell on all the possibilities that would never come to pass.
"Besides," Mary went on, "by the looks of it, you might not even have been able to enter the Oculus Waste if that rift hadn't appeared between the dimensions."
"Mary's right," Mick muttered gruffly from his place at the holotable across from them. "We got the frequency of that place from that rift. Without it, Cisco couldn't have set up that gizmo to open a portal to the right place. At least not so fast."
"I think we can agree that," Iris said, "given all that's happened, we're lucky we're all in one piece. And I'm grateful for it."
"Yeah, me too," said Sara, trying to calm her racing thoughts and deciding to take the win, despite its lateness in arriving.
Having succeeded in getting her head back in the game, she chose to voice another dilemma, one she'd had since her previous visit to the Sanctuary.
"You told us," Sara said, "that Will had some trouble readjusting to life after you brought him back from that place. Do you think we have reasons to worry about Leonard? Or Barry?"
"From my observations of Mr. Snart before the frequency reset," Mary replied, after careful consideration, "I would have said yes. Yet, seeing how… normal he behaved afterward… I don't really know, to be honest."
"He was like that on the Oculus Waste too," Sara said. "He was very much aware of the situation and extremely clear-headed the whole time."
"Even after we got out of there," Iris chimed in, "he was quite coherent. Just unsteady on his feet, like he was dizzy."
"Well, taking that into consideration," Mary said, "it is entirely possible that his and Will's experiences on the Waste itself were wildly different. Especially seeing as their reactions at being found and then returned to our dimension contrast so sharply. But there still may be some subtle side-effects not yet noticed." She paused, looking at each of them in turn in a calculating manner. "I have a suspicion that you were all affected to a degree, the three of you included, even if it might not be noticeable at first."
"Affected how?" Iris asked, a hint of worry touching her tone.
"I'm not certain," said Mary. "In my instance, a while after returning to the Vanishing Point, I'd noticed I had gained a heightened sense of the passage of time while on a mission. Will had, as well, developed that sense after recovering. That was one of the reasons for volunteering to do research at the Vanishing Point after retiring, and then watch over the Sanctuary."
"Because those are places where time doesn't pass, right?" Iris concluded, turning to Sara for confirmation.
"That could be both a blessing," Sara murmured, her fingers going numb at the thought, "and a curse."
"Indeed it could be," Mary said, nodding for emphasis. "There is no need to worry, though. It is not something that one couldn't adapt to or fail to control. For me, it was simply being more aware of how time passed, like a sixth sense in the background."
"And what about Barry and Snart?" Iris asked.
Sara could tell that the other woman was still uneasy with this new development, even if on the surface she seemed to have taken it in stride.
"I really don't know what effects this might have on a speedster," said Mary. "To my knowledge, none has ever been on the Oculus Waste before. He might exhibit some symptoms, slightly milder ones maybe, if he does at all. It is entirely possible that his connection to the Speedforce may help him bounce back from this unscathed. At least physically."
"I really hope so," Iris whispered and Sara felt a pang of heartbreak for her.
"As for Mr. Snart," Mary continued, "again, I truly cannot say, as his situation is unique and he's been there a very long time. Also, from what you've told me while Will was resetting his frequency, it seems he'd managed to channel that place's very essence into a weapon to fight off the Time Wraiths."
"You think he'll be able to do that again?" asked Sara, thinking that such an ability would be a pretty nifty trick to have up one's sleeve.
"The only way to know," Mary said, "is through, if he's up for it, trial and error." She tapped a few times on one of the holotable's screens, sifting through some data. "Although, according to these scans, I find that highly unlikely."
"Well, it would have been kick-ass," Sara said at the same time Mick muttered "Bummer…" and Iris said "Shame…", which made all three burst into laughter.
"What I do know for certain," said Mary when they had quieted, "is that Mr. Snart, at least, has spent two years in a place that shows those who wander it various iterations of the past, present and future. If he decides that he wishes to talk about what he witnessed in those windows in time, he needs someone to be there for him emotionally. Because some things are hard to reconcile, especially when they haunt one's dreams."
Sara mulled over that new piece of information and realised what Mary was implying. Depending on which parts of the timeline Leonard had seen in those swirling mists – Zari's future came to mind at that point, among others – there was a strong possibility that those after-effects would resemble PTSD. And Sara didn't know if the changes Leonard had undergone since his heroic 'death' would extend to wanting to talk about his demons to anyone.
"What you're describing," said Iris, after presumably giving it some thought herself, "sounds an awful lot like PTSD."
Sara didn't know if she would ever get used to how perceptive Iris was. No wonder she'd been so successful as an investigative journalist.
"In a manner of speaking," Mary leaned against the holotable and sighed. "There is really no telling until it happens, if it even does. Like I said before, Mr. Snart seems normal. A lot different than the first time I met him, yet a far cry from what Will was like after I got him back."
"And how do I help him if things do get bad?" Sara asked, and she had to put some effort into preventing the tremor that was creeping its way up her throat from surfacing.
She really hoped it wouldn't come to that. But, ever since boarding the Waverider for the first time, Sara realised that nothing was impossible. And that nothing seemed to go according to plan, not in their line of work.
"The only way to help," Mary said, a sad look on her face, "may be something as simple as listening if he wants to talk and supporting him in any way he might need. He might also need a reminder – or more – that he's no longer a prisoner of that Waste. The rest is up to him."
"I really hope he'll accept it," Sara murmured, biting her lip as a wave of uncertainty gripped her. "In the time we've worked together before he… well… he wasn't one to open up to anybody. It took a near-death experience for him to tell me how he'd met Mick. So the chances of him seeking out help are pretty slim."
That had been one thing about Leonard that had infuriated Sara, even though she understood where he was coming from. She'd hit the same roadblock when dealing with her own demons. And she understood this inability to talk about what was eating away at her very soul, especially since her resurrection. But she'd become a little more forthcoming about that sort of thing in the past couple of years. And Leonard – she suddenly realised that she'd started thinking and speaking of him on a first name basis, and when had that happened? – seemed to have changed somewhat too, so hopefully things could only improve, given some time.
The feeling of a warm hand settling gently over hers drew her attention back to the present. She glanced down at the brown skin and slender fingers – one of them adorned with a wedding band and an engagement ring – and then raised her gaze to meet Iris' kind eyes.
"I have a bit of experience in dealing with someone who's experienced trauma," Iris whispered, her tone soft. "I can help with that, if you want me to."
"I'd appreciate that," said Sara and straightened her back as she pushed away from the holotable. "I've had my fair share of… skeletons in the closet, so to speak, and I know it can get really bad when it comes to letting others in. I'd be grateful to get some advice from someone who's seen a different side of this."
"Also, I don't think it's going to be that hard to get Snart to open up," Iris mused, gazing at Mick for some reason. "He seemed a lot friendlier and more ready to help than the last time I met him."
"Yeah, that's weird," Mick chimed in, a sign that he'd clearly been eavesdropping. "He even ditched the drawl. It's gonna take a while to get used to that."
"I think," Mary said with a tilt of her head and a smile, "that your entire group of friends will have to adjust to a new dynamic."
"We'll have to burn that bridge when we get there," Mick grumbled. "Or something like that… y'know what I mean." He paused and typed something on one of the screens, then turned to them again. "Now, we better get movin'. I'll go tell those two we're ready to go."
With that, he turned on his heel and stomped out of the room. And while his gruff exit made Iris throw her a confused look and Mary raise an eyebrow, Sara smiled at the arsonist's antics.
"Don't worry about him," Sara told the other two, still smiling. "He's a little blunt and sometimes has a hard time expressing his thoughts, but his heart is in the right place."
"Well then, I guess this is goodbye for now," Mary straightened and clasped her hands in front of herself. "Give my regards to the rest of your team."
"Will do," Sara said. "We're really grateful for all your support."
"Thank you so much," Iris said, "for helping me get my husband back."
"It was my pleasure," Mary inclined her head and turned for the exit.
They walked in silence until they reached the ramp and Sara felt like a weight had been lifted off her chest at the realisation that this was, for the most part, over. They'd succeeded without losing anyone in the process, at least not permanently. With Gideon's help, Barry would recover, and he and Leonard would have a support system to get them through any possible after-effects of this ordeal.
Sara herself had also found a friend in Iris, someone loving and empathetic, whom she was determined to get to know better. And if there was anything she could, in turn, do for Iris, she would do it without hesitation.
So she decided to take the win and live by Mick's words: they'd deal with any problems when or if they arose. For now, it was time to head home.