Chapter 10

Melissa leant against the basin as she stood and waited for Stephanie to appear from the cubicle in the ladies restrooms. She lifted her wrist as she chewed her lip anxiously and glancing at her watch, she let out a surprised gasp as she realised the time. She was due back at her desk and Mark would no doubt be on the warpath.

"Come on Stephanie. I can't wait any longer." she called out.

She heard the click of the door and as Stephanie emerged from behind it, her pale face told Melissa everything she needed to know. She frowned in sympathy as her brown eyes watched her friend carefully. "It's positive, isn't it?"

Stephanie nodded her head and sighed heavily as she flipped the lid and threw the pregnancy test in the waste paper bin. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest. She felt numb as she looked across at her. "What am I going to do Mel? The last thing I need right now is a baby in my life."

Melissa's heels clicked against the tiled floor as she walked over and placed her arm around Stephanie's shoulders. She tucked a loose hair behind her ear as she squeezed her affectionately. "I don't know Steph but I'm sure you'll figure something out. Maybe once the news has sunk in, you'll feel differently about it. Maybe you'll actually look forward to having a child."

A sad frown encompassed her face as she shook her head. "No, I won't and I know that sounds horrible and selfish but it's the truth. This baby ties me to Shawn and there's no way I can think about leaving him now. I'm trapped Mel."

Stephanie leant her head against hers and sighed. She had felt nothing but despair since the day she suspected she was pregnant. She had taken at least five tests in the hope that one would show up negative but so far none of them had. It was a pretty safe bet to say that she was pregnant.

"And you're sure this baby is Shawn's? There's no way it could be Paul's?"

Stephanie lifted her head giving her friend a wry smile. "That's the first thing that crossed my mind too until I thought about the dates." She puffed out her cheeks as she shifted her feet on the tiles. "I'm only four weeks late. I got my period on the second week of our honeymoon. I remember it vividly. I actually saw it as a blessing in disguise."

Melissa squeezed her shoulder once more and gave her a sympathetic smile in return. "So how far along do you think you are?"

"About eight weeks I think. I'm surprised I've not had more symptoms yet. I've never really felt nauseous or put on any weight."

"That's probably because you've been so distracted lately. That plus you haven't exactly been eating properly. It's no wonder you haven't put on an ounce."

Stephanie's mouth parted to reply when she was interrupted by someone banging on the door and a muffled voice shouted through to them.

"Hey! Whoever is in there had better open up before there's an accident out here."

Stephanie and Melissa looked at one another and burst into laughter despite the moment. They were still giggling as they walked over to the door and Melissa unlocked it. She didn't even have time to open the door before it was roughly pushed open from whoever was outside. The person didn't even acknowledge them and ran straight for a cubicle.

Melissa watched and shook her head. "Desperate times then?" She made her way out into the corridor. "I couldn't even tell who that was she was so fast."

Stephanie smiled as she followed her out smoothing down the hem of her cream coloured sweater. "I think it was Susan from accounts but I'm not sure."

She nodded as she stopped and turned to look at her friend. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

Her friend sighed as she ran her hand through her hair letting the loose strands fall softly around her face. "I don't know Mel. It's going to take a while for this to sink in I think."

"Well try and not make any rash decisions. Give yourself time to really think about what it is you want. Having this baby doesn't necessarily mean staying with Shawn you know."

Stephanie's jaw was clenched in determination as she adamantly shook her head. "No Melissa. If I have this baby then I stick with my marriage. That's one thing I am sure about."

"Okay." She smiled as she stopped outside her office. "Well its back to the grind. I'll talk to you later?"

Stephanie nodded and returned to her office. She had just approached her desk when felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned around to see Mark, her boss, standing smiling at her. He held an envelope in his hand which he held out.

"It's an invitation for a book launch I'd like you to attend." he explained. "It's one of the writers you signed up last year."

Stephanie smiled in acknowledgement and opened up the envelope. She quickly scanned the invitation. "Jennifer Hall. I didn't realise her book was published already."

"Yes and we're expecting it to do really well."

"It's in Boston in two weeks time. I'll check my diary but I'm pretty sure I'll be able to make it."

Mark pushed his glasses further up on his nose and smiled. "Good. You can let me know if there are any problems."

Stephanie smiled and watched as he walked away disappearing amongst the hustle outside but her smile soon faded as she looked back at the invitation and realised the name of the venue. It was the hotel; the same hotel that she had stayed in the last time she was in Boston. The very hotel where she had met Paul and fallen in love with him.

She sighed heavily and she felt a pang in her chest as she pushed out her chair and sat down at her desk. As she stared at the scattered piles of paper, Stephanie couldn't help but let her thoughts drift to Paul and she wondered how he was and what he was doing. Shawn still hadn't heard anything from him and he seemed to have given up even trying to contact him. And as far as she knew, Shawn hadn't even talked to Kevin either. Although that wasn't a bad thing as far as she was concerned. It had been over two weeks since she had talked to Kevin and discovered that he knew all about her and Paul. Ever since then she had been on tenterhooks wondering if he would let his conscience get the better of him and decide to tell Shawn the truth. But right now that was the least of her problems. She was pregnant with a baby that she wasn't sure she wanted. She had a lot of thinking to do and a major decision to make; a decision that Paul sadly no longer played a part of.

Kevin tapped his pen on the desk as he sat in his office deep in thought. After his conversation with Stephanie a couple of weeks back, he had decided not to tell Paul about what he had accidentally overheard. He thought it was for the best for everyone concerned especially his friend. He had come so far and had somehow gotten past his despair at losing Stephanie. In fact he seemed to be coping and getting on with his life again. If he knew what Stephanie had said about loving him, Paul would either be back to square one and start drinking again or it might give him the incentive he needed to actually do something about getting her back. And as much as Paul was his friend, so was Shawn. He couldn't be the one responsible for ruining his marriage. Or at least that was what he had thought. Now he was starting to have major doubts about his decision not to tell Paul.

He knew how much Paul loved Stephanie. He had seen it for himself and after a lot of thinking over the last couple of weeks, he realised that he couldn't be the one stopping his friend from being completely happy. Paul had literally been on cloud nine when he had called to tell him all about this amazing woman he had met while he was in Boston. He had even told him his plans for relocating to New York just so he could be with her. No-one had been more surprised to hear that than he had been. Paul had no shortage of admirers over the years but his friend had never really been interested in settling down. Sure, he'd gone out on dates and had the odd relationship here and there but they never seemed to last. Paul's problem was he was full of ridiculous romantic notions. He wanted to find "the one" and had always believed that there was one person out there that you were destined to spend the rest of your life with. Of course both he and Shawn had laughed at him – several times in fact – but it looked like his friend had been right all along. Right up until the part where he found out she belonged to someone else.

And that was another dilemma Kevin faced. Shawn. He loved Stephanie and what would it do to him if he was to lose her? He didn't deserve to be unhappy and to have his life ruined – he was too nice a guy for that to happen to him. But then again, he also deserved to be with someone who wanted to be with him because they were in love with them and not because they were too scared to admit the truth about loving somebody else. And Kevin didn't doubt that Stephanie loved Paul especially not after what he had overheard.

He threw down his pen and quickly picked up the phone before he lost his nerve. God knows he had changed his mind and back again so many times over the last couple of weeks. Kevin listened to the phone ring out at the other end and he checked his watch. It was just before eight o'clock. Maybe Paul was still at work. It wasn't unusual for him to be at the office at such a late hour. He was about to hang up when he heard the breathless reply at the other end.

"Hello?"

"I'm not interrupting anything there am I buddy?"

Paul's laughter echoed down the line. "No, unfortunately Angelina Jolie can't make it over tonight so I decided to get my workout at the gym instead. I ran inside when I heard the phone ring." There was a short pause and some movement on the other end. "So, is this you being motherly again and checking up on me?"

Kevin chuckled. "Something like that. How are you doing anyway?"

He heard another brief pause followed by a soft sigh.

"I'm alright. I actually went five minutes without thinking about her today. That's got to be a record, huh?"

His eyes flickered with his sympathy. "Paul, these things take time and ….."

Paul interrupted him before he could say anything else. "I know. You can spare me the lecture. I made the mistake of telling my mom everything and that's what I've been getting ever since. Her other favourite saying is there's plenty more fish in the sea."

Kevin chuckled before letting out a calming breath. The words were on the tip of his tongue to tell him about Stephanie when he heard his friend talk once more.

"You know my sister's also taken it upon herself to set me up with a friend of hers. We went out for a drink at the weekend."

His mouth parted in surprise at the news, amazed that Paul had actually gone on the date. "How did that go?"

"It was okay actually. She seemed nice enough."

"You don't sound too excited about it."

Paul's heavy sigh crackled down the line. "Well I only went through with it for Lynn's sake more than anything else. She's just trying to help I suppose. The only problem is she's arranged for us to have dinner with her on Saturday."

"It all sounds very cosy. You never know. You might actually enjoy yourself."

"Maybe. God knows I need to try and do something. I mean I've accepted I'll never have Stephanie to share my life with. It doesn't stop me from wanting her in it though."

Kevin closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair as he made his decision and offered Paul a silent apology. "I know. Look buddy I gotta go. I'd better go and check that Phil's re-stocked the bar before we open. I'll call you next week."

"Okay. Take it easy Kev."

Kevin hung up before he listened to the voice in his head telling him to change his mind. He knew that what Paul had just said had given the perfect opportunity to tell him what he had overheard Stephanie say about loving him. However, he decided he couldn't do it. Paul was trying to move on and seeing other people was definitely a step in the right direction. He would keep what Stephanie said to himself. It was best all round and it would save any further heart-ache for everyone involved, in particular his two best friends.